The Ridonculous Race: Reimagined
by Lord of the Sloths
Summary: Twenty two teams of two race around the world for one million dollars. There will be lots of laughs, lots of love, and lots of drama. Find out who wins: The Ridonculous Race Reimagined.
1. None Down, Twenty Two To Go Part 1

Don is standing in front of a historic Toronto train station.

"Toronto: Capital of North America, birth place of funk, where the albino panther roams free" Don introduced. "These are some of the many facts the writers made up. Right now I'm waiting for twenty two teams that will embark on a race around the world for a million dollars. I'm your host Don and this is: The Ridonculous Race"

The camera switches to the interior of a train.

"Let's meet out teams. This is Carrie and Devin. Best friends since childhood" Don narrated.

 **Team Interview**

"We've been friends since we were like two years old" Devin said.

"Yeah, we sure have" Carrie said.

Carrie leans closer to Devin.

"Um... What are you doing?" Devin asked.

"Oh... You have something on your shirt" Carrie said.

 **End Interview**

"Crimson and Ennui. Really creepy teens who need to get more sun" Don said.

Lightning strikes in the background.

"Wow, that is unsettling" Don said.

 **Team Interview**

"I guess winning would be okay" Crimson said. "I don't really care"

"Yeah..." Ennui said. "I'd use the money to plan my funeral"

 **End Interview**

"Jay and Mickey. Identical twins with very lousy luck" Don said.

A bunch of suitcases fall on top both of them.

"Okay, that was an understatement" Don said.

 **Team Interview**

"We don't have what you would call good luck" Jay said.

"But we keep pushing through it" Mickey said.

"I know we can win" Jay said.

Jay tries to high five Mickey but hits him in the face.

"Gah! My face!" Mickey exclaimed.

 **End Interview**

"Kelly and Taylor. Mom and Daughter" Don Narrated.

Kelly files her nails. Taylor takes the file from her and uses it on her.

 **Team Interview**

"Okay, so for some reason my mom thought signing up for this show was a good idea" Taylor said.

"Taylor and I are really tight. Sometimes we get mistaken for sisters" Kelly said.

"What..." Taylor said. "Can you edit this out?"

 **End Interview**

"Emma and Kitty. Actual sisters" Don said.

Kitty takes a selfie of her and Emma.

"Stop that" Emma said.

 **Team Interview**

"This is going to be so fun" Kitty said.

"We don't have time for fun" Emma said. "If win that million we're set for life"

"I bet a selfie will make you feel better" Kitty said.

"It won't" Emma said.

 **End Interview**

"Owen and Noah. Seasoned reality TV professionals" Don introduced.

Owen hugs a teddy bear and Noah rolls his eyes at him.

 **Team Interview**

"We met back on Total Drama" Owen said. "After that we were on lots of other shows: Scare Factor, Kitchen Meltdown, Fashionista Flip-Flop"

"I honestly don't think I was qualified for any of those shows" Noah said.

"I'm so excited to go on an adventure with my little buddy" Owen said.

Owen hugs Noah.

"Owen... I... Can't... Breathe..." Noah said weakly.

 **End Interview**

"Bonnie and Jack. Cousins with very different approaches to life" Don said.

Bonnie looks to be about nineteen. She had brown hair tied in a pony tail that reaches down to her shoulders and green eyes. She wore a purple sweater with a green stripe on the stomach, new looking blue jeans and sandals. She was tall and in pretty good shape.

Jack look about a year or so younger than Bonnie. He had straight brown hair he combed back and blue eyes. He wore a light blue T-shirt with a star on it, tan shorts, and sneakers. He's slightly overweight and a bit shorter than his cousin.

 **Team Interview**

"Me and Jack have been good friends... Okay my only friend" Bonnie said. "He's the only person who can actually stand listen to me for more than two minuets. But we're going to win this. Right Jack?"

Jack is distracted by something off screen.

"Jack!" Bonnie yelled. "Pay attention!"

Jack quickly turns his head to Bonnie.

"Oh, sorry. I got distracted" Jack said. "There was a guy with a cool hat... It had bird on it"

 **End Interview**

The train stops and the teams get off. Tom and Jen step off the train.

"Tom and Jen. Two incredibly camp fashion bloggers" Don announced. "And before you ask, no, I've never heard of their blog either"

 **Team Interview**

"So one day Jen bet that we could totally win this show" Tom said. "And I decided to take her up on the bet. Now we're here"

"Plus this is an absolutely fantastic way to promote out blog" Jen said.

"And we can blog about foreign fashion" Tom added. "Triple win"

 **End Interview**

"Leonard and Tammy. Live Action Role-Players... Don't know what it is but it sounds nerdy" Don said.

Leonard and Tammy step off the train.

"Behold the power of Leonard the Magnificent!" Leonard announced.

 **Team Interview**

"Tammy and I have been friends since ninth grade" Leonard said.

"We were stuffed into the same locker" Tammy explained.

"We unpacked out lunches and waited for the janitor to find us and we've been friends ever since" Leonard said. "We both helped with the siege on Castle Red-Skull"

Tammy pulls an ocarina out of her backpack and plays a tune.

 **End Inteview**

"Josee and Jacques. World class ice dancers" Don narrated.

Josee and Jacques jump out of the train.

"Hello fans!" Josee said excitedly.

They both wave at the camera.

 **Team Interview**

"We're world class skaters" Jacques bragged. "We won gold everywhere"

"Except at the Olympics" Josee said. "Jacques dropped me on my head and I had to go the hospital... We only got silver"

"No! Don't remind me!" Jacques exclaimed.

Jacques runs off screen.

"He doesn't like to remember it" Josee said. "Silver is his least favourite colour"

 **End Interview**

Brody and Geoff are the next ones off the train.

"Geoff and Brody. Totally rad surfer dudes" Don Narrated. "Do people still say rad?"

Geoff waves to the camera.

"Hey Bridgette, love you. Hope you're watching" Geoff said.

 **Team Interview**

"My girlfriend Bridgette was busy with some sort of a surfing competition" Geoff explained. "So I got my bud Brody to come with me instead"

"I'm so psyched for this" Brody said.

"Me to bro" Geoff said.

 **End Interview**

"Melvin and Trevor. Master magicians" Don said. "Wow... I thought the LARPers were nerdy"

Melvin is a tall slender man in his mid to late thirties with a thin moustache. He is bald and has hazel eyes. He wears a black blazer, blue velvet pants, a red bow tie, and black laceless shoes.

Trevor is about a head shorter than Melvin and a few years younger. He has ginger hair parted in the centre and green eyes. He wears a red jacket, black pants, a top hat, a black bow tie, and black laceless shoes.

 **Team Interview**

"We are professionals" Melvin said confidently. "Of course... The magic business isn't as profitable as it used to be"

"Out last ten shows were all at children's birthdays" Trevor said. "Have you tried getting a pyrotechnics team into a small house? It's hard"

"But with this show we get free promotion and a chance to get funds" Melvin said.

Trevor reaches in to his hat pulls out a business card and shows it to the camera.

"Alakazam!" Trevor said.

 **End Interview**

"Ryan and Stephanie. Two totally in love daters" Don narrated.

Ryan and Stephanie step off the train.

 **Team Interview**

"We've been dating for two month and six days" Ryan said. "We've been going steady ever since"

"There's going to be so much to so on this trip" Stephanie said. "Like what flavours of protein bars they have in China"

"I was just wondering that" Ryan said.

"No way" Stephanie said. "Sometimes out minds are just in synch like that"

 **End Interview**

The teams go towards Don.

"Right this way teams" Don said. "We're still waiting on some more teams. In fact I can see some of them now"

The camera pans over to see Laurie and Miles parking their bike.

"Laurie and Miles. Hippies, vegans, and friends to mother nature" Don said.

 **Team Interview**

"There are so many great causes to give to with the prize" Laurie said. "The Hike and Bike Foundation, The Canadian Vegans Society, or Save the Vampire Dragonflies"

"I think that last one was a bad example" Miles said.

"Good point" Laurie said.

 **End Interview**

"Sanders and MacArthur. Incredibly ambitious police cadets" Don narrated.

Sanders and MacArthur join the rest of the teams.

 **Team Interview**

"We're tough as nails and we'll do anything to win" MacArthur said.

"As long as we don't break any international laws" Sanders added.

"I wouldn't mind breaking a few" MacArthur said.

"Oh dear God" Sanders said to herself.

 **End Interview**

"Judy and Lucy. Chefs'" Don said.

Judy and Lucy get off a nearby bus.

Judy looks to be in her early twenties. She is slightly overweight. She had brown curly hair that goes down to her neck and blue eyes. She wore a typical white "Chef's Shirt", white pants, and black shoes.

Lucy looks to be a bit older than Judy, and about a head taller and slightly thinner. She has straight short hair and light green eyes. She wore an outfit that matches her partner only with black pants instead of white and light blue shoes.

 **Team Interview**

"We've started up a small catering business" Judy said.

"The main reason we're here is it try foreign food" Lucy said. "We don't care about winning"

"This is the best idea we've ever had" Judy said.

 **End Interview**

"Mary and Ellody. Geniuses with an IQ so high that I'm not even sure it's a real number" Don narrated.

Mary and Ellody get off of a bus.

 **Team Interview**

"Astrophysics is underfunded. Reality shows offer monetary prizes, conundrum solved" Ellody said.

"She said we need money and this show has it" Mary translated.

"Mary, don't about the intellect of the viewers" Ellody said.

"Sorry..." Mary said

 **End Interview**

"Dwayne and Dwayne Junior. Father and son" Don said.

Dwayne and Junior walk up to the rest of the teams.

 **Team Interview**

"I spend a lot of time around the office. I thought this would be a good chance for me to spend some time with Junior here" Dwayne said.

Dwayne puts his arm around Junior.

"Yeah... That's nice dad" Junior said. "Are there any kids my age here?"

"Um... Well..." Dwayne said awkwardly.

 **End Interview**

"Gerry and Pete. Old tennis rivals" Don said.

Gerry and Pete walk down the street.

 **Team Interview**

"We've always been kind of competitive" Gerry said. "We thought this would be a good way to get back in the game"

"And for sponsorships" Pete said.

"If you have any of those rash creams and need a spokes person call his agent" Gerry said pointing to his partner.

 **End Interview**

"Lewis and Tracey. Actors... Who you've probably never heard of" Don said.

Tracey looks to be in her mid forties. She had blond hair that is in a bun and green eyes. She wore a blue long sleeved shirt, a purple skirt, a turquoise necklace, and leather boots. She was tall and in pretty good shape.

Lewis look about the same age as Tracey. He had straight brown hair he parted to the left and blue eyes. He wore a black turtleneck, tan pants, and laceless shoes. He's in pretty good shape.

 **Team Interview**

"We were a pretty big deal back in the 90's" Lewis said. "We were on every magazine cover"

"But lately we've only been getting parts in crappy sitcoms that get cancelled after one season" Tracey said.

"I actually wanted to host this show but they wanted someone younger" Lewis said. "But I figured that even competing would be good enough publicity for us to get our careers back together"

"What could go wrong" Tracey said.

 **End Interview**

"Chet and Lorenzo. New step brothers" Don narrated.

Chet and Lorenzo exit a bus having a slap fight with each other.

 **Team Interview**

"His stupid mom married my dad and now there making us do this to get along" Lorenzo said.

"Don't call my mom stupid you jerk" Chet said.

Chet pushes Lorenzo.

"You asked for it barf breath" Lorenzo said.

Lorenzo pushes Chet back.

 **End Interview**

"Last but not least: Rock and Spud. Rockers" Don said.

Spud and Rock join the rest.

 **Team Interview**

"We're taking a break from rocking out for a bit" Rock said. "Even if Spud isn't athletic we're just doing it for fun. And I've always wanted to be on TV"

"We're on TV!" Spud said.

"You signed up remember" Rock said.

"No I didn't" Spud said.

 **End Interview**

All the teams have gathered around Don.

"Now that you're all here the game can begin" Don said. "You need to get to the CN Tower where you will find the Don Box and get your travel tip. You will be able to recognize it because it has my handsome face on it. Now go!"

The teams start running and trample Don.

"No! Not the face!" Don exclaimed.

The teams start running down the street to get to the CN Tower. Jaques and Josee trip over some garbage cans.

"Whoa are you dudes alright" Geoff asked.

They both immediately spring up and the trash can lands on Geof and Brody.

"Nothing can stop us!" Josee said.

Dwayne and Junior make it to the CN Tower.

Junior presses the button on the Don Box and a travel tip pops out. More teams start to arrive. Junior takes the tip.

"It's an Either/Or" Junior said. "What the heck in an Either/Or?"

"An either or is where the teams get two options. Each with their own pros and cons" Don explained to the audience via voice over.

The scene shifts to a staircase.

"Teams can either choose to take the sitars up the tower" Don narrated.

Cut to Don standing on the ledge of the tower.

"Or take the elevator up and walk around the edge" Don said.

Cut back down to the teams.

"Definitely taking the elevator" Junior said.

"We're world class skaters. We're taking stairs" Jaques said.

"Elevator" Tom said. "What person in their right mind would take the stairs"

"Stairs seem safer" Jay said.

 **Team Interview**

"I have a rare condition where we can't go up high to fast" Mickey explained.

"He gets nose bleeds if we do" Jay said. "This is why we don't get out much"

 **End Interview**

Inside the tower Dwayne and Junior make it into the elevator first.

"We made it kiddo" Dwayne said. "High five"

Dwayne tries to high five Junior but misses and hits the buttons. This causes it the malfunction and all the buttons light up. Dwayne awkwardly tugs on his shirt collar.

"Let's take the stairs" Junior said.

"Good idea sport" Dwayne said.

Sanders and MacArthur enter the elevator.

"Well... I'm not going up those floors" MacArthur said. "Let's go Sanders"

The Adversity Twins, Police Cadets, Ice Dancers, Father and Son, Daters, Stepbrothers, and Surfer Dudes are already on their way up the stairs. Tom and Jen get in the elevator.

"Oh come on who pressed the buttons?" Jen complained.

"Whatever it'll still be faster" Tom said. "Close the doors"

Jen presses the button to close the doors.

"You are not getting up there with out us!" Bonnie exclaimed.

Bonnie and Jack run at the doors.

Jen presses the button faster.

Bonnie makes it through the doors but Jack is left outside.

"Uh oh..." Jack said. "I can catch up with her if I take the stairs"

Jack runs up the sitars. The Ice Dancers are in the lead on the sitars.

"Some teams have chosen the stairs" Don narrated. "It's going to take lots of endurance to make it to the top"

Sanders is looking tired out.

"I can't take it any more... I'm going to pass out" Sanders said.

"I'm twice your size and I've barely broken a sweat" MacArthur said.

MacArthur picks up Sanders.

"Do you have to do that?" Sanders asked.

"Do you want me to leave you here?" MacArthur asked.

"Fair point" Sanders said.

Meanwhile in the elevator Tom and Jen are talking to camera.

"Hello to all of our followers" Jen said. "Right now it's time for out favourite part of our blog. What you shouldn't wear"

"Today's item we're discussing is sweaters" Tom said. "Yuck, I mean who would want to look like a stuffed animal?"

"What do you have against sweaters?" Bonnie asked.

"Oh... We forget you were here..." Jen said.

The elevator stops. Tom, Jen, and Bonnie get out.

"Now we can strut to victory" Tom said. Tom looks at the area they have to climb on.

"Okay... Maybe we should take a small break" Jen said.

Tom nods in agreement.

"Well I have a million dollars to win" Bonnie said.

"Excuse me ma'am Don said you need to be part of a team to go out there" A man with a box of helmets said.

"I am part of a team" Bonnie said.

"Where's your parter?" the man asked.

"Waiting for the elevator..." Bonnie said. "Okay, I'll sit down"

Meanwhile down by the elevator, The Best Friends, LARPers, Magicians, Reality TV Pros, Actors, Vegans, Rockers, Mom and Daughter, Chefs, Goths, Sisters, and Geniuses are waiting for the elevator.

"With the elevator slowly returning the teams have no choice but to wait... And wait... And wait" Don narrated.

The elevator returns. Most the teams make it on. Owen, Noah, Judy, Lucy, Leonard, Tammy, Kelly, and Taylor are not able to make it in.

"Rude much" Taylor said.

"Taylor, remember what I said about keeping positive" Kelly said.

"Shut up mom" Taylor said.

"Wow, that's a nice cloak. Are you are a magician?" Owen asked Leonard.

"I'm a wizard" Leonard said. "My best friend Tammy's a bard"

"Yeah... I'm gonna go over there" Owen said.

Meanwhile back on the staircase. Dwayne and Junior are looking tired out.

"Dad... Can we take a break?" Junior asked.

"We just need to pace ourselves Junior" Dwayne said. "Just take it one step at a time"

Geoff and Brody run past them.

"Dude we're getting such a work out from this" Brody said.

"I know man" Geoff said. "We'll be so chiselled we'll look like statues from the knees down"

Ryan is carrying Stephanie.

"You doing okay?" Ryan asked.

"Keep doing what your doing" Stephanie said.

Chet and Lorenzo are slowly walking.

"If... We come in last... I'm telling dad it's your fault" Lorenzo said.

"You will not... You... Knucklehead" Chet said seeming visibly out of breath.

"That was a... Terrible insult... You jerkwad" Lorenzo said.

A few flights of stairs up Jay and Mickey are going at a slow pace.

"Stay with me Mickey" Jay said.

Mickey has his eyes crossed and a is unable to stop smiling.

"Why is there a leprechaun on the ceiling?" Mickey asked.

Mickey falls forward.

"This is why we don't have many friends" Jay said.

Back on the top floor the elevator arrives.

"I can see the sky walk" Devin said.

Carrie and Devin grab a helmet and step out on to the sky walk. Before anyone else can grab a helmet Tom and Jen step up to the box.

"Hang on one second. I need to make sure my helmet is disinfected" Tom said.

The other teams glare at him.

On the sky walk Devin and Carrie step out.

"Oh God, I'm gonna die" Devin said.

"You've always wanted to get over your fear of heights" Carrie said.

"I'm not afraid of heights I'm afraid of falling from heights" Devin corrected.

While Carrie is reassuring Devin the Tennis Rivals, Rockers, and Geniuses run by.

"Yes! We're in the lead" Pete said.

Meanwhile back at the base of the tower the elevator arrives again. The teams who were left behind before get on. Lucy is eating a package of peanuts. Lucy eats one before immediately spits it out.

"God, why did I think those would be good!" Lucy said.

 **Team Interview**

"We both have very refined pallets" Judy said.

"God! It has a horrible after-taste!" Lucy exclaimed.

 **End Interview**

Meanwhile back at the stairwell.

"Almost there..." Jack said. "Just a few more floors..."

Jack's cellphone starts ringing. Jack answers this.

"Hello, who is this?" Jack asked.

"Jack! Where the Hell are you!" Bonnie shouted through the phone. "The elevator came and you were nowhere to be found"

"I'm climbing the stairs" Jack explained.

"What..." Bonnie said. "I could have gone on the sky walk forever ago"

"Oh... Sorry" Jack said.

"Get to the top of the stairs and wait for me" Bonnie said. "I'll be there"

Bonnie hangs up.

Back at the top of the tower the elevator arrives.

"Alright we made it" Owen said.

Meanwhile on the sky walk most of the teams have begun crossing.

"It's okay Devin just put one foot in front of the other" Carrie said reassuring him.

"Thank you..." Devin said. "Keep up the good work"

 **Team Interview**

"Carrie's the perfect person to take with me" Devin said. "She always know what to say. She has my best interests in mind... And my girlfriend Shelly was busy"

"Wait what?" Carrie said.

 **End Interview**

"If the wind keeps its current speed we should arrive in approximately nine minuets" Mary said.

"Indeed" Ellody said.

The camera pans over to the Vegans, Rockers, and Actors.

"Please don't kill us mother earth" Miles said.

"We're doing this for you" Laurie said.

"Spud stop standing around" Rock said.

"What?" Spud asked. "Oh my God how did we get up here!?"

"This is too much Tracey" Lewis said. "I don't do my own stunts"

"So do I. But do you hear me complaining?" Tracey said.

"Okay fine" Lewis said.

Kitty is taking pictures of the city.

"Kitty, stop that" Emma said. "You could get injured... Or worse"

"Are you kidding this is so cool" Kitty said. "I've never felt so alive"

"I'll make sure to put that on your grave" Emma said.

Emma grabs Kitty's arm.

Pan over to the Magicians, Mom and Daughter, Fashion Bloggers, and Bonnie.

"Don't let go Tom" Jen said.

"I'll try" Tom said. "Can you believe people pay to do this"

"I am going to die up here" Bonnie said. "Why couldn't Jack just take the elevator"

A newspaper hits Bonnie in the face.

"My face!" Bonnie exclaimed. "Oh hey, their rerunning Calvin and Hobbes"

"Be careful mom" Taylor said.

"I'm trying" Kelly said.

Kelly slips. Luckily for her Trevor is able to catch her.

"I've got you gorgeous" Trevor said.

"Thanks... But I'm already married" Kelly said.

"Well this is awkward" Trevor said.

 **Team Interview**

"You know if there are any ladies out there I'd be happy to put on a magic show for you" Trevor said.

"Was that a euphemism or are you literally referring to the fact we perform for bachelorette parties?" Melvin asked.

"Yes Melvin. The incredibly suggestive way I said that meant I was trying to promote us" Trevor said sarcastically.

"Sorry, sorry, just checking" Melvin said.

 **End Interview**

Meanwhile back inside the tower.

"The teams who chose the stairs are now leaping ahead of the others" Don narrated. "Some more literally than others"

Josee and Jacques leap out of the stair doors.

"Are we winning?" Josee asked.

A local guide hands them their tip.

"It says we have to take a zipline" Jacques said.

Josee and Jacques go over to the zipline. They strap themselves to the zipline and push off. Josee grabs the travel tip and they land on a mattress by an airport.

"It says we have to take a flight to Morocco" Josee said reading the tip.

"Congratulations. You two are in first and have the honour of being on flight number one" Don said.

Meanwhile at the exit to the sky walk Gerry and Pete are the first one's out.

"Yes we made it" Gerry cheered.

Pete collapses in pain.

"Gah! My artificial knee!" Pete exclaimed. "It collapsed!"

Noah and Owen are the next ones off the sky walk.

"Come on we can win this" Noah said.

Noah and Owen make it to the zipline and take it to the airport. Owen manages to grab the travel tip. They crash into the mattress.

"We're going to Morocco" Owen said reading from the tip.

"I think you crushed something when we landed" Noah said.

Sanders and MacArthur exit the staircase.

"We made it" MacArthur said.

"Can you put me down?" Sanders asked.

"Sure" MacArthur said.

MacArthur drops Sanders.

Sanders and MacArthur head over to the zipline and land with no problems.

Carrie and Devin are the next ones off the sky walk. Ryan and Stephanie make it out of the stairwell and Pete makes a recovery and gets on his feet. They all get to the ziplines.

"This is for Wimbledon '77!" Gerry said playfully shoving Pete.

Unfortunately this makes Pete lose his grip and fall into the water.

"Sorry" Gerry said.

Gerry grabs the travel tip but loses his grip and falls.

The Best Friends and Daters land without any issues.

Back in the tower Geoff and Brody make it out of the stairwell.

"We made it bro" Geoff said.

Brody collapses in pain.

"I think I strained something" Brody said.

"Don't worry dude, I'll figure something out" Geoff said.

Dwayne, Junior, and Jack make it up the stairs.

"Never do that again" Junior said.

"But we're still in the lead" Dwayne said.

Tracey, Lewis, and Bonnie make it off the sky walk.

"Well I've learned that stunt doubles need to get paid more" Lewis said.

"Agreed" Tracey said.

"Hey! Jack! Over here!" Bonnie called.

"There you are" Jack said. "Come on we can make it"

All three of the teams strap on to the zipline and slide over to the airport while grabbing their tip.

"I think we made it on to the first flight" Jack said.

"No. The others did" Don said.

"Yes!" Junior cheered.

"We barely made it" Lewis said.

"But we landed first" Bonnie said.

"Yes but you chose the elevator and Jack chose the stairs" Don explained. "Which means you get a thirty minuet penalty"

"You have got to be kidding me" Bonnie said.

Back in the tower.

"More and more teams complete the sky walk" Don narrated. "Now it's a race to get the good seats on flight two"

Mary, Ellody, Emma, and Kitty exit the sky walk.

"Our prediction was perfectly accurate" Ellody said.

"Nine minuets precisely" Mary said.

"Come let's go" Kitty said.

"I think my life just flashed before my eyes" Emma said.

The two teams zipline to the finish.

The Magicians, Mom & Daughter, and Fashion bloggers get off the sky walk next.

"Again sorry about earlier" Trevor said.

"The more you bring it up the worse it is for everyone" Kelly said.

"I'll make sure my partner stops hitting on you ma'am" Melvin said.

"I can't believe we actually made it" Jen said.

"My shirt is ruined forever" Tom complained.

The teams make it to the ziplines.

Halfway across the zipline Trevor's hat falls off.

"Not the hat!" Trevor exclaimed.

Trevor reaches for his hat. He grabs his hat but lets go of the zipline and falls into the water. The rest make to the other side of the of the line.

"Melvin you have to wait for your partner" Don said. "The rest of you make it to flight two"

"Damn it" Melvin said.

Back in the tower the Rockers, Vegans, and Chefs make it off of the sky walk.

"That was crazy" Rock said.

"Whoa, how did I get back inside?" Spud asked.

"Is he like that all the time?" Judy asked.

"It's normal by this point" Rock answered.

"We did this for you mother earth" Miles said.

"I'm not sure if it was worth it" Laurie said.

All three of them zipline to the other side.

"We made it on flight two" Lucy said.

The three teams run to their plane.

"Cousins, your penalty time is up" Don said.

"We did it" Jack said.

"Thank God" Bonnie said.

"Congratulations. You have got the last seat on flight two" Don said. "As for the remaining teams they will be on flight three"

Meanwhile back in the tower Chet and Lorenzo make it up the stairs.

"Thank God. We finally got out" Chet said. "Why did you take the stairs?"

"It was your idea you moron" Lorenzo said.

"Brody, we need to move" Geoff said.

"I need... Potassium" Brody said weakly.

"Does anybody have a banana?!" Geoff asked.

"I don't think they do" Brody said.

"Don't worry dude I'll carry you" Geoff said.

Geoff picks up Brody.

Jay makes it up the stairs dragging Mickey behind him.

"I am a dainty princess" Mickey sang.

 **Team Interview**

"Why did we sign up again" Jay asked.

"I don't know..." Mickey said.

 **End Interview**

Back near the sky walk the Goths and LARPers are the last ones off.

"I think we're losing" Crimson said.

"Whatever" Ennui said.

The teams zipline to the finish.

"We made it" Jay said.

"Where are we now?" Mickey asked.

"We have to take a plane..." Jay said nervously.

"Yay... Flying" Mickey said.

"To the flying machine!" Leonard cheered.

"We still don't care" Crimson said.

"Nice going jerk now we're in last" Lorenzo said.

Gerry, Pete, and Trevor climb out of the water.

"Come on Pete let's go!" Gerry said.

"Slow down my knee still hurts" Pete said.

"Thank God, there you are" Melvin said.

"A snapping turtle tried to eat me" Trevor said.

The scene switches to an electronic map of the world.

"All the teams have gotten on their planes. Now the race really begins" Don narrated. "There are three planes. The teams on the first plane get the advantage and the teams on the last plane will be in a race to not be eliminated"

Three yellow outlines of planes light up on the map.

"Flight one shall carry the Polcice Cadets, Ice Dancers, Reality TV Pros, Best Friends, Actors, Father & Son, and Daters" Don narrated.

Circles with portraits of the teams pop up in the background.

"Flight two contains the Sisters, Vegans, Cousins, Fashion Bloggers, Rockers, Chefs, Mom & Daughter, and Geniuses" Don Narrated.

More portraits pop up.

"And last but not least flight three carries the Tennis Rivals, LARPers, Surfer Dudes, Stepbrothers, Magicians, Adversity Twins and Goths" Don narrated.

More portraits appear.

"One of those teams I mentioned will be going home next time" Don narrated. "Who will it be. Find out next time on: The Ridonculous Race"

* * *

 **Wow this is probably one of the longest chapters I've written. I hope you liked it. If your wondering why I made this before my Pahkitew Island fanfic I decided that since this season was a spin off I could make it any time I want and it's one of my favourite seasons. I'm not sure if it was a good idea or not but I'll do it anyway. Let me know what you thought of my OC teams. Also if you found Bonnie annoying that was sort of her intention. I wanted to challenge myself by making a character that wasn't likeable. Please be sure to give constructive criticism.**


	2. None Down, Twenty Two To Go Part 2

"Last time on the Ridonculous Race. Twenty two teams of two left on an adventure around the world. Right now flight one is halfway there and flight two is about to take off. One of the teams on flight three is going to have the ultimate reality TV humiliation of being the first sent home. Find out who it will be right now on: The Ridonculous Race"

The teams on flight three are waiting for their plane in the airport.

"Okay Mickey I bought a bunch of tissues in case you get nose bleeds while flying" Jay said.

"Good, I bought a some oven mits in case I touch something I'm allergic to" Mickey said.

Leonard and Tammy pop up from behind them.

Greeting gentlemen!" Leonard said. "What do you say to an amalgamation of adversaries? A weaving of wizards and doppelgängers to rule them all!"

Tammy throws some confetti in the air.

"No! I'm allergic!" Jay cried.

Jay runs off.

The camera pans over to Chet making a phone call.

"Your plan will never work mom. We don't like each other" Chet complained. "Can you just divorce his dad?"

"Is that my dad?" Lorenzo asked.

Lorenzo steals the phone from Chet.

"Dad! Divorce Chet's mom!" Lorenzo yelled.

"That's my mom you jerk!" Chet said.

Chet and Lorenzo fight over the phone.

The camera pans over to Crimson and Ennui sitting on a bench next to Melvin and Trevor.

"You two remind me of a street magician I once knew" Trevor said. "I think his stage name was "The Bat" or something lke that"

They both ignore him.

"You know I am a professional" Melvin said. "Observe"

Melvin pulls a string of handkerchiefs out of his sleeve.

The Goths get up and leave.

 **Team Interview**

"We don't like people as bright and cheery as them" Ennui said.

"We also aren't looking forward to going somewhere as sunny as Morocco" Crimson said

 **End Interview**

 **Second Interview**

"You know if you hadn't if you hadn't gone after your hat we wouldn't have to put up with those pasty freaks" Melvin said.

"This is a special hat" Trevor said. "I can't do any magic tricks with out it"

 **End Interview**

The Moroccan flag appears in the background accompanied by some images of the desert.

"Morocco, originally called Italy until they found out Italy already existed" Don narrated. "Home to hot deserts and hot spices this is where the first flight has just landed"

At the Morocco airport the teams on flight one run off their plane. The Ice Dancers are the first ones out of the plane closely followed by the Cadets, Daters, Actors, Father & Son Best Friends, and Reality TV Pros. Jacques presses the button on the Don Box and takes the travel tip.

"The Spice Is Right" Jacques read from the travel tip. "It's an All In"

Cut to Don standing next to a local spice kiosk.

"An All In is where both members of the team participate" Don explained. "In this case getting spices from this local spcice kiosk. Some are sweet but some will _set your insides on fire_!"

Back at the airport all the teams have gotten there travel tips.

"It says to pick five spices. Ideally Cinnamon, Cumin, Paprika, Saffron, and Ginger" Noah read. "Sounds pretty easy"

Suddenly him and Owen are trampled by the other teams trying to get in their taxi. After the other teams leave Owen reaches up from the ground.

"Taxi..." Owen said weakly.

Cut to the inside of Dwayne and Junior's taxi.

"See pal what did I tell you" Dwayne said. "We're doing great"

"Yeah... Sure I guess" Junior said.

 **Team Interview**

"I'm Dwayne and this is my son Dwayne Junior" Dwayne said.

"They already know that dad" Junior said.

"We're a father and son team" Dwayne said.

"They already know that to" Junior said.

"Oh... I bet they didn't know we're going to win" Dwayne said.

 **End Interview**

Meanwhile in Ryan and Stephanie's taxi.

"I know a lot about spices" Stephanie said. "I eat them all the time"

"She does" Ryan said. "And I love that I know that about you"

"Me to" Stephanie said.

They both start making out.

"Um... Should I keep filming?" The cameraman asked from offscreen. "Hello? Are you listening?"

Meanwhile in Noah and Owen's taxi.

"I've always kind of had a really bad fear of being on planes" Owen said. "I tried to get over it... Didn't work. But now I have my very own teddy bear to help me calm down. His name's Beary. Get it?"

Owen shoves Beary into the side of Noah's face.

"Sadly yes" Noah said.

"Noah doesn't like him but he likes Noah" Owen said.

"Please stop" Noah said.

Meanwhile in Lewis and Tracey's cab.

"I think we're doing surprisingly well" Lewis said.

"My only complaint is that this taxi is filthy" Tracey said. "There's a lollipop stuck to my shirt"

"This is still better than working on those terrible direct to DVD sequels" Lewis said.

"Okay you're right about that" Tracey said.

Both of them shudder at the thought of it.

Meanwhile on flight two.

"The teams on flight two prepare for a cold battle to keep their lead" Don narrated.

"Attention passengers we will be landing in Morocco within the next thirty minuets" the pilot said via intercom.

Emma is writing something down on a notepad.

"What are you doing?" Kitty asked.

"I'm trying to determine who our biggest threat is" Emma said.

"Have you figured it out?" Kitty asked.

"No. But I've narrowed it down to the Ice Dancers, Police Cadets, and all the teams who've had prior experience on reality TV"

The camera pans over to Rock and Spud. Rock looks nervous.

"Spud and I have never been on a plane before" Rock said. "Luckily I've seen lots of them in movies"

"You mean like Snakes on a Plane?" Spud asked. "That was a fun movie"

Rock's eyes widen.

"Oh man... I'm gonna die" Rock said. "On the bright side I get to meet Sam L. Jackson"

Meanwhile the Police Cadets, Best Friends, Daters, Actors, and Ice Dancers have arrived at the Spice Kiosk.

"Why aren't these labelled?" MacArthur asked.

"This one's cinnamon!" Carrie sad excitedly.

"Okay, no need to get so excited" Devin said.

"Sorry. I'm just having a lot of fun" Carrie said.

The camera pans over to Stephanie looking at different spices.

"That one's saffron" Stephanie said. "Wait! No! Yes! No! Maybe... Give me a moment..."

The man running the kiosk gives Stephanie a confused look.

"SCOOP IT!" Stephanie yelled.

The man quickly scoops the spice into a bag.

"We're done" Jacques said.

The man hands them a travel tip.

"We have to travel to a restaurant on a camel?" Jacques said.

The camera pans over to several old smelly looking camels.

The Best Friends and Daters get on their camels.

"Excuse me is there a restaurant around here?" Sanders asked.

The man gives no response.

"A REST-AU-RANT! WE LOOKING FOR EAT! Sanders said loudly.

"Sanders, he isn't deaf. He just doesn't speak English" MacArthur said. "Sorry about that"

The man at the stand doesn't say a word.

"I AM SORRY! APOLIGIZIO, YOU UNDERSTAND?!"MacArthur shouted.

"Let's just get on the camel" Sanders said.

"The others left" Tracey said.

"I know. There are just two spices left" Lewis said.

"We can't lose our lead now" Tracey said. "We'll never get our careers back on track. Just pick two random ones. What's the worst that can happen?"

Lewis picks out two random spices before getting on the camel with his partner.

Cut to later where the five teams are riding their camels.

"Ugh... These camels smell terrible" Carrie complained.

Pan to MacArthur smelling her armpit.

"Yep... Definitely the camels" MacArthur said quickly.

Back at the airport flight two finally lands.

"With flight two now landing things are really heating up" Don narrated.

The flight two teams run out of the airport and make it to the taxis. The only team to get left behind is Taylor and Kelly.

"What the- Where did the other cabs go?" Taylor asked.

"I'm sure thing will get better" Kelly said.

A broken down cab pulls up to them.

"See there's a cab" Kelly said.

"Not getting in there" Taylor said. "I see another one"

They go up to a better looking cab and get in.

"Follow those other taxi's!" Taylor demanded.

Meanwhile flight three is in the air.

"On flight three the teams discuss strategy" Don narrated.

"If you arch your arm a little higher you're boss" Geoff said.

"Thanks bro" Brody said.

Brody tosses a pretzel behind him that lands is Gerry's mouth. This causes Gerry to wake up.

"What happened?! Why am I covered in pretzels?" Gerry asked.

"What's going on?" Pete asked.

"I actually don't know" Gerry said.

Dwayne and Junior make it to the spice stand along with Noah and Owen.

"Let's see... Which spice to pick... Um..." Owen said nervously.

 **Team Interview**

"Picking spices was hard but I kept my cool" Owen said.

 **End Interview**

"WHY DO YOU ALL LOOK THE SAME?!"Owen shouted before running away.

Dwayne and Junior awkwardly look at each other.

 **Team Interview**

"It isn't a mans job to know about spices" Dwayne said. "In ancient times women were the spices collectors and men were the huners. Those were the days. Men and the power and-"

"You know mom is probably going to see this right?" Junior asked.

"And times have changed" Dwayne said quickly. "Yay!"

 **End Interview**

"Dad, the other teams are catching up. We're gonna lose our lead" Junior said. Junior points to several taxi cabs approaching them.

"Just pick out any five" Dwayne said to the man at the counter.

"That's a good plan. Give us the five closest to you" Noah said.

The man nervously looks at the spices.

"Come on man! Snap to it! My partner will eat anything. I once saw him eat half a shower curtain" Noah said.

"It had pictures of cupcakes on it" Owen said.

The man scoops five random spices and gives them to Dwayne and Owen. Both teams get on their camels. The flight two teams get out of the taxis. The Geniuses and Vegans are the first ones to make it to the spice kiosk.

"Cumin, cinnamon, paprika, saffron, and ginger" Ellody and Laurie said while pointing to the spices they want.

"That was surprisingly elementary" Ellody said.

"I know right" Laurie said.

Meanwhile the final plane has landed.

"As more teams flight three has landed in Morocco" Don said. "They'll need to hurry if they want to avoid going home"

The Surfers, Magicians, Stepbrothers, LARPers, Tennis Rivals, and Adversity Twins grab their travel tips and get in the taxi to the spice kiosk.

Meanwhile in the desert the Reality TV Pros, Father & Son, and Actors are trekking through the desert.

"That's just great. The lollipop stuck to my shirt melted and now there's a red stain" Tracey complained.

"At least you get to sit in the back" Lewis said. "The suns been shining in my eyes forever"

"Onward!" Dwayne yelled at the camel.

"Dad, I think the camel's going to pass out" Junior said.

"Nonsense Junior. Camels are ships of the desert. They're tireless" Dwayne said

The camel collapses from exhaustion.

"Oh great we got a broken one..." Dwayne complained.

Junior facepalms.

The Actors and Reality TV Pros pass them.

Back at the kiosk the Sisters and Cousins are the only ones left.

"What to choose..." Jack said to himself.

"It doesn't matter" Bonnie said.

"But the it end up really spicy" Jack said.

"I understand your concern" Bonnie said. "Luckily I like spicy food"

Bonnie scoops up some random spices before getting on her camel.

"Which one of these is cumin?" Emma asked herself.

"Is it this one?" Kitty asked.

"You can't just pick at random" Emma said. "Um... Maybe it's this one?"

Emma fills the bag with a yellow spice.

"Why can you guess?" Kitty asked. "Why can't I?"

"Because it's an educated guess" Emma said. "Now let's go"

Emma and Kitty run to their camel. Jay and Mickey make it to the kiosk.

"We're not in last" Jay said. "Come on let's find some spices"

"Which one is cinnamon?" Mickey asked himself. Mickey sniffs a basket of red spice. This causes him to sneeze violently and create a cloud of spice.

 **Team Interview**

"The good news is we found out we're allergic to cinnamon" Jay said.

"The bad news is we found out be inhaling it" Mickey said.

 **End Interview**

The cloud clears and Jay and Mickey are lying on the ground. The rest of the flight three teams arrive at the kiosk.

Meanwhile the Vegans, Chefs, Geniuses, and Fashion Bloggers. The Vegans are walking next to their camel instead of riding it.

"I can't take this sun" Jen said. "It's going to fade the colour out of my shoes"

"Why didn't I bring sunglasses..." Tom complained.

"I am so excited to try these spices" Judy said.

"Me to!" Lucy exclaimed. "I can barely contain myself!"

"Isn't this camel the greatest" Laurie said.

"I never thought I would meet one" Miles said.

 **Team Interview**

"Our camel was beautiful. And the desert was very hot. If we win we're launching a stop riding camels campaign" Laurie said.

"Take hikes not humps!" Miles cheered.

"Don't say that... It sounds really weird" Laurie said.

 **End Interview**

"You do know a camel can go up to 65 kilometres an hour and go two weeks without water" Mary said to the Vegans. "It would be beneficial to ride it"

"But we're doing this for mother nature" Miles said.

"We don't have anything in common do we?" Mary asked.

Meanwhile Sanders and MacArthur are the first to arrive at the restaurant.

"We made it" Sanders said. Sanders runs up to the Don Box and takes the travel tip. MacArthur slowly walks up to her and collapses.

"I can't take it... Somebody turn off the sun..." MacArthur said.

"Calm down while I see what we do next" Sanders said. "It's a Botch-Or-Watch"

"That's one where only one of us does the challenge right?" MacArthur asked. "If it is, you're doing it..."

"It says we have to give the spices to the chef and eat the entire bowl of Moroccan stew" Sanders said. "After eating the stew continue on foot to the Chill Zone because-"

The scene cuts to Don standing in the Chill Zone.

"... The last team to meet me here will be cut from the race" Don said.

Cut back to Sanders and MacArthur. The Chef hands them their stew. Behind them are Carrie and Devin as well as Josee and Jacques. Josee is holding a lucky rabbits foot.

"Come on Bun-Bun, don't let us down" Josee said to the rabbit's foot.

 **Team Interview**

"I'm not superstitious, I just believe this rabbits foot is the source of all my success" Josee said.

"Can I rub it?" Jacques asked.

"Of course you _can't_ " Josee said.

Jacques takes a few steps back from his partner.

 **End Interview**

Meanwhile Dwayne is trying to get his camel off the ground.

"Move you stupid humped horse" Dwayne demanded.

"Dad we've been here forever" Junior said. "Maybe we should just walk"

"I'm not giving up" Dwayne said.

Leonard and Tammy pass them on their camel.

"It works better if you _ride_ the camel" Leonard said.

"I know that!" Dwayne said angrily.

Leronard and Tammy pass the Vegans.

"Take hikes not humps!" Miles yelled at the LARPers.

"Miles, I like you... But you need to stop trying to make that a thing" Laurie said.

 **Team Interview**

"We're getting back in the lead" Leonard said. "We were held up in the taxi. The fool wouldn't except dragon coins"

"He'll rue that decision when Armetheaus the Dragon Lord takes the throne" Tammy said.

"Oh he will so rue it" Leonard said.

 **End Interview**

Devin is eating his stew while Carrie watches.

"Oh Devin" Carrie said.

Carrie realizes the camera is on her.

"Oh... That was just... I was... Okay I love him!" Carrie confessed. "I've loved him ever since we were four and he peed n my turtle pond... That's not _why_ I love him, that's just when it started. But how do I tell him? What if he doesn't feel the same? Plus he already has a girlfriend, _Shelly_... Who is probably going to see this..."

Carrie facepalms.

"Carrie! I finished the stew!" Devin announced.

Carrie runs up to him.

"Let's go we're in first" Devin said.

Devin and Carrie start running.

The chef hands off a bowl of stew to Ryan and Stephanie.

"Let's rock and roll!" Rock cheered as he and Spud get off their camel.

"Come on Jack, time is money. In this case very literally" Bonnie said getting off her camel.

The Goths, Magicians, Geniuses, Chefs, Stepbrothers, and Surfers get off their camels. Suddenly Gerry and Pete's camel speeds past the rest before coming to a halt and launching the two of them off and into the sand.

"I think I need another kidney transplant..." Pete said weakly.

Sanders is slowly sipping at her stew wiping her mouth between sips. MacArthur is glaring at her. Every time Sanders wipes her mouth MacArthur's eye twitches.

"Stop taking your time and chug!" MacArthur demanded.

"This is how civilized people eat" Sanders said.

"We don't have time to be civilized" MacArthur said. MacArthur tilts the bowl forcing Sanders to swallow the remaining stew.

"Freeze! I mean... Done!" MacArthur said holding the bowl above her head. "Let's go!"

They both start running.

The camera pans over to Josee standing on one leg while drinking her stew.

"Such grace and perfection!" Jacques said drawing attention to Josee.

"I'm done!" Josee said. "Let's move!"

The camera pans over to Crimson and Trevor drinking stew while Melvin and Ennui watch.

"Wow, your friend isn't even flinching while drinking that" Melvin said. "How are they doing that"

"We've practised not showing emotions" Ennui said. "We're able to marathon the Toy Story movies without crying"

The camera pans over to Ryan and Stephanie. Ryan is drinking the soup and Stephanie is hugging his chest.

"Keep going babe!" Stephanie said.

The camera pans over the Chefs and Fashions Bloggers.

"How's the soup?" Lucy asked Judy.

"It's a culinary nightmare" Judy answered. "How did we mess it up. We're chefs"

"The smells were blending together and they all looked the same" Lucy defended.

"I can only eat this in small portions" Judy said.

"Tom, stop taking so long" Jen said.

"I'm being very careful. You know how much these clothes cost. There isn't anywhere for me to wash them" Tom said.

The camera pans to Owen and Noah. Owen is red in the face from the spice.

"Noah! I think you picked the wrong spices!" Owen said.

"Owen, you're about ad picky as a raccoon just do it" Noah said.

The camera pans to the Sisters and Actors. Lewis finishes his stew.

"See was picking the last two at random so bad" Tracey said.

"Thpeak for yourthelf my mouth ith thwollen!" Lewis said.

"Oops... Come on just drink some water and get going" Tracey said.

Emma takes a sip of stew.

"Yuck! This is terrible" Emma complained.

 **Team Interview**

"We picked some of the wrong spices" Emma said.

"You picked them" Kitty pointed out.

Emma glares at her.

"Which is good... I would have just guessed" Kitty said.

 **End Interview**

Ellody talks to Geoff while watching their partners eat.

"When I met Brody he was eating a cat's hairball on a dare" Geoff said. "I managed to one-up him by eating a jar of wasabi. I'm still seeing my doctor about it"

"I met Mary at an engineering school potluck diner we both brought pi themed pie" Ellody said. "We're quite whimsical"

"Heh, pies" Geoff said.

"You aren't the brightest star in the galaxy are you?" Ellody said.

The camera pans to the Cousins.

"You know I really don't want to do this" Bonnie said.

"You're the one who just picked random spices" Jack said.

"Okay fine" Bonnie said.

Bonnie chugs down the stew.

"That wasn't so bad" Bonnie said.

Bonnie suddenly passes out.

"Bonnie?" Jack said.

Jack pokes her.

"Hello? Earth to Bonnie?" Jack said.

Bonnie's leg twitches.

"Okay you're alive" Jack said.

Jack starts dragging her.

The camera pans over to Chet and Lorenzo.

"Stop slurping! I hate it!" Lorenzo said.

Chet spits the stew in Lorenzo's face.

"Don't spit at me!" Lorenzo yelled.

Chet spits the stew at Lorenzo.

"If you do that again I will punch you!" Lorenzo threatened.

Chet's eyes widen and he starts sipping the stew normally.

Meanwhile Lewis and Tracey are wandering through the desert.

"Make the thun thtop thining" Lewis complained.

"Lewis, stop talking. I can't understand you" Tracey said.

"Trathy, I think were lotht" Lewis said.

"I can't understand a word you say" Tracey said.

"I thaid: were lotht!" Lewis said.

"Wait, I don't recognize anything. I think we're lost" Tracey said.

"I jutht thaid that!" Lewis said angrily.

Meanwhile Carrie and Devin make it to the Chill Zone.

"Congratulations Best Friends" Don said. "You are in first place"

"We made it!" Devin cheered.

"I knew we could do it" Carrie said.

"I wonder if there's a phone. I have to tell Shelly about this" Devin said.

 **Team Interview**

"Coming in first is a bit of a shock" Devin said.

"We're a great team and all but I wasn't expecting first" Carrie said.

 **End Interview**

Back at the desert restaurant Owen finishes his stew.

"Need! Water!" Owen exclaimed.

"Calm down I bought some in the airport" Noah said.

Owen snatches the bottle from Noah and gulps down the whole thing.

"Is there any more?" Owen asked.

"I bought one for me and one for you... That was yours" Noah said. "But since this is an emergency..."

Owen grabs the second water bottle and chugs it down.

"Okay... I'm good... Is there a washroom nearby?" Owen said.

"Go behind a cactus and make it quick" Noah said impatiently.

The LARPers and Vegans make it there next.

"Did you remember to give our camel our E-mail addresses?" Laurie asked.

"I did... Although I'm not sure if camels have computers" Miles said.

Meanwhile Sanders and MacArthur are running through the desert.

"Is it me or did the atmosphere become a lot more girly?" MacArthur asked.

They look behind them to see Josee and Jacques close behind the. Jacques is holding Josee above his head.

"That's just weird..." Sanders said.

"So long cadets" Jacques taunted.

"Jacques look out!" Josee cried.

Josee's warning came late as they both crash into a tree.

"Later skaters!" MacArthur said. "See what I did there?"

"Yes" Sanders said.

"Because their actually skaters" MacArthur explained.

"Yeah, I got it... I just didn't get it" Sanders said.

Back at the desert restaurant the Surfers, Daters, Geniuses, and Tennis Rivals finish their stew.

"Let's go bro" Brody said.

Brody and Geoff run off.

"Come on Mary we're wasting precious nanoseconds" Ellody said grabbing her partners hand and running off with the other teams.

"That stew was terrible" Pete said. "I'm glad it's over"

"Great now let's go" Gerry said.

Gerry and Pete follow the rest.

"Come on babe we can out run the other teams" Stephanie said.

Back near the chill zone MacArthur and the Ice Dancers are racing.

"I am not losing to a man in a pink leotard" MacArthur said.

"Well I'm not losing to a... I can't think of anything good" Jacques said.

Both of them keep running. Sanders and MacArthur reach the Carpet of Completion before the Ice Dancers.

"Police Cadets, you are in second" Don proudly announced.

Josee and Jacques make it to the carpet next.

"As a French-Canadian ice dancing team you probably hear this a lot: Third place" Don mockingly said.

Josee's eye twitches.

 **Team Interviews**

Josee screams from off screen and throws knives, pots, pans, and chairs at Jacques.

"Josee is a _very_ competitive woman" Jacques said nervously.

 **End Interview**

Cut to a black screen.

"Fourth!" Don announced as a picture of the Daters is shown

"Fifth!" A picture of the Geniuses is shown next.

"Sixth" The Surfers were shown next.

"Seventh" The Actors were after that.

"Eighth, Ninth, Tenth" Don announced with pictures of the Reality TV Pros, Fashion Bloggers, and Tennis Rivals shown.

"Eleventh!" Emma and Kitty are physically shown.

"What! Eleventh!" Emma yelled. "You need to start doing more"

"I would love to do more" Kitty said.

"I'll tell you when to do more" Emma said.

Back at the desert restaurant the LARPers, Vegans, Magicians, Mom & Daughter, Stepbrothers, and Chefs. Dwayne and Junior finally made it. Dwayne is lying down on the camel's back. Junior takes the stew from the chef.

"Come on dad you need to eat this stew" Junior said.

"My mom's done!" Taylor declared holding up her empty bowl. Taylor starts running.

"Not so fast Taylor..." Kelly said holding her stomach in pain.

"I'm done" Chet said.

"Took you long enough" Lorenzo said. "It would have been quicker if you hadn't constantly been spitting it at me"

"Shut up" Lorenzo said before running off.

"I'm finally done" Trevor said.

"We've been here for hours" Melvin said.

Melvin and Trevor run after the rest.

Junior talks to the camera with his dad passed on on the camel in the background.

"So I didn't sign up for this, and I don't really want to be here" Junior said. "But now that I'm here I don't want to be the first to go home"

Junior turns around and goes to talk to his dad.

"Come on dad it's like you always tell me: Never say quit" Junior said.

"Actually sport... It's: Never say never..." Dwayne said weakly.

"I don't really listen to you" Junior said. "Just get up and eat"

Back at the Carpet of Completion Jay and Mickey are the next ones there.

"Twelfth" Don announced.

"We did surprisingly well" Jay said.

Jack drags the unconscious Bonnie across Carpet of Completion.

"Thirteenth... Is she okay?" Don said.

"Jack... When I can move my legs I will kill you" Bonnie muttered.

"She's fine" Jack said.

Cut back to the black screen.

"Fourteenth" Don said accompanied by a picture of the Goths.

"Fifteenth" A picture of the Rockers shows up.

"Sixteenth" The Magicians are shown.

"Seventeenth" A pictures of the Mom & Daughter show up.

"Eighteenth" The Stepbrothers are shown.

Back at the desert restaurant.

"The only teams remaining are the Vegans, Father & Son, Chefs, and LARPers" Don narrated. "One of them will be cut from the race"

Dwayne takes the stew from the chef.

"I hope we the right spices" Dwayne said.

A flame shoots out of the stew. Both of them go by

"Dad you need to hurry and down this stew" Junior said. "We're in last"

"Level completed!" Tammy said excitedly.

Leonard and Tammy run past them.

 **Team Interview**

"So what's a little spice?" Dwayne said. "Let's do this thang. Heh, "Thang" makes me sound like a kid"

"It really doesn't" Junior said.

 **End Interview**

Dwayne stares at the stew before swallowing the entire thing.

"Wow..." Junior said.

"I'm done" Laurie said.

"Good" Miles said.

"Let's go Lucy" Judy said.

"I think I burned off my taste buds" Lucy said.

The Vegans and Chefs run past Dwayne and Junior.

"That wasn't so bad" Dwayne said.

Suddenly Dwayne's eyes go in opposite directions.

"I'm blind! I can't see! Temporary blindness!" Dwayne exclaimed.

"Come on we can make it!" Junior said

Junior grabs his dad's arm and starts running.

The LARPers are in the lead closely followed by the Vegans and Comedians with Dwayne and Junior trailing behind.

 **Team Interview**

"The others were catching up fast" Tammy said.

"There was only one thing we could do" Leonard said. "MAGIC!"

 **End Interview**

"Song on slumber!" Tammy said.

Tammy pulls out her ocarina and plays a tune on it.

"Chaos barrier!" Leonard said waving around a staff.

The other teams just run past them.

"Why did nothing happen?" Tammy asked.

"Who cares we need to catch up!" Leonard said.

Laurie and Miles are the first to make it to the Carpet of Completions.

"Congratulations my nature loving friends" Don said. "You placed nineteenth"

Lucy and Judy make it there next.

"Twentieth for the Chefs" Don said. "And here comes twenty first"

Dwayne and Junior make it to the Chill Zone.

Junior lets go of his father's arm.

"Tell me if I'm going to hit a tree!" Dwayne yelled.

"How long are you going to let him do that?" Don asked.

"I just needed a break" Junior said.

 **Team Interview**

"Twenty first place! Come on we can do better" Dwayne said. "I know, we'll stay up and talk strategy"

"Great..." Junior said.

 **End Interview**

Leonard and Tammy defeated walk across the finish line.

"The Ridonculous Race is about skill... Not magic" Don said. "You're out"

"Time reversal spell!" Tammy chanted.

"Security!" Don yelled.

Clips of Leonard and Tammy competing play.

"I think we could have done better" Tammy narrated over a clip of her and Leonard getting off the train.

"We got to do lots of things I never though we'd do, that's something" Leonard said as clip of them ziplining plays.

"I'm glad we did this together. We can share these memories, forever!" Tammy said as the scene shifted to them walking through the desert.

"I still don't see why they make us walk home" Leonard said.

* * *

 **This chapter was a lot like the canon episodes hopefully the changes I made kept it interesting. As for the elimination Leonard and Tammy have very limited plot options. And this is coming from someone who actually finds them mildly amusing. Let me know what you thought.**


	3. French Is an Eiffel Language

"Last time on the Ridonculous Race. Our teams went to Morocco and built up an appetite frankly, I think they should have gotten a pizza. The winners were Carrie and Devin. In my book everyone else lost. But we could only eliminate one team and that was Leonard and Tammy. I'm not sad. They were weird... But that was then and this is: The Ridonculous race"

Don is standing next to a Don Box at the Carpet of Completion.

"Yesterdays Chill Zone is today's starting line. Teams will depart in the order they arrived" Don explained. "First up the _intrguingly platonic_ Best Friends"

Carrie and Devin run up to the Don Box and take their travel tip.

"We're going to Paris!" Carrie said excitedly.

"Cool!" Devin said.

Cut to the France flag with a photo of the Paris skyline to accompany it.

"Paris France, home of mimes, tiny coffees, and other things that annoy me like you wouldn't believe" Don said.

Cut to Don standing on top of the Eiffel Tower.

"Once in Paris teams must make there way here, to the Eiffel Tower to receive their next tip" Don explained.

Back in Morocco Carrie and Devin get on their mopeds.

"Let's go!" Carrie cheered.

 **Team Interview**

"I can't believe we're going to Paris" Carrie said. "It's the most romantic place on earth"

"If we win the million I'm going back there, with Shelly" Devin said. "I miss you baby!"

Devin waves at the camera.

 **End Interview**

"Could you loosen you grip a bit" Devin asked Carrie.

"Oh, sorry" Carrie said.

"Move aside!" A voice from behind them said. Carrie and Devin look behind them to see Sanders and MacArthur.

"Official police business" MacArthur said.

The Cadets pass Carrie and Devin. Close behind Sanders and MacArthur Josee and Jacques catch up. They both smile at the camera.

 **Team Interview**

"As sports heroes we never know when the camera's are off what with the paparazzi and all" Josee said.

"So we just have to always smile... Even in our sleep" Jacques said.

"It's very painful... But worth it" Josee said.

 **End Interview**

Back near the Chill Zone the more teams start to leave.

"Look out!" Mickey said.

Jay and Mickey crash their moped into a sign and Mickey falls out followed by Jay crashing into the tree.

Tom and Jen struggle to put a carper on their moped. Tom and Jen turn to the camera.

"If we knew we were going to the fashion capital of the entire universe we wouldn't have spent so much money on this authentic hand woven Moroccan carpet" Jen explained.

"Paris!" They both said excitedly.

Meanwhile the first team to the airport is Josee and Jacques. They run up to the clerk.

"Do you offer upgrades for Olympians" Josee said proudly.

"We offer first class upgrades for all gold medal persons" The clerk said.

"Never mind" Josee said through gritted teeth.

Lewis and Tracey push both of them out of the way.

"Do you offer upgrades for movie stars!" Tracey asked.

"I have no idea who you are..." The clerk said.

More teams arrive. Gerry and Pete look behind them.

"Do you hear something or is my hearing aid acting up again?" Pete asked.

"I hear it to" Gerry said. "I think both of our hearing aids are acting up"

Geoff and Brody drive through the doors and crash into a pile of luggage.

Back on the road more teams are driving down the road. Lorenzo has his hands over Chet's eyes.

"Get your hands off my eyes!" Chet demanded.

"Get your eyes off my hands!" Lorenzo said.

"What does that mean?!" Chet asked.

"I don't know!" Lorenzo shouted.

Ahead of them are the Chefs.

"Lucy, do you think we should slow down?!" Judy asked.

"We're going to Paris! They have some of the best food in the world!" Lucy said. "I haven't had any, but I've heard great things!"

"I just think you should-" Judy began before Lucy drives them into the tree cutting her off.

"... Slow down" She finished.

Ahead of them is Tom and Jen.

"Tom! The carpet's slowing us down!" Jen said. "We need to dump it!"

"But it's so expensive" Tom said.

"We're going to Paris!" Jen said.

"Okay..." Tom said. "You're free! Fly!"

Tom tosses the carpet off the moped where it unfurls. It flies at Dwayne and Junior.

"Look out!" Dwayne shouted.

They get wrapped in the carpet swerve off the road and crash. Laurie and Miles pass them peddling their moped instead of using it normally.

"Pedal power!" Miles cheered.

 **Team Interview**

"We didn't ride our camel through the desert yesterday, so they'd stay hydrated" Miles said.

"And today we're peddling out moped to conserve fuel" Laurie said. "Oh! I wish there was a way to give this moped to our camel"

"Can camels ride mopeds?" Miles asked.

"Note to self... Invent camel moped..." Laurie said.

 **End Interview**

The Cousins, Sisters, and Rockers are nearing the airport. Emma and Kitty make it there first.

"Come on let's go!" Emma said.

"I'm going as fast as I can" Kitty said.

Rock and Spud park their moped.

"Come on Spud!" Rock said.

"What?" Spud said.

"We stopped moving" Rock said.

"Oh..." Spud said.

Rock and Spud enter the airport.

"Jack! Hit the breaks!" Bonnie demanded.

"Where are they?!" Jack asked.

"I don't know! I've never ridden a moped before!" Bonnie said.

They crash their moped into the airport wall.

"Where are the airbags..." Jack said weakly.

 **Team Interview**

"We haven't been doing to well" Jack said.

"You think! I was passed out for half of the last challenge!" Bonnie said angrily.

"What can we do?" Jack asked.

"We need and alliance" Bonnie said. "Tell me Jack, who is the smartest team here?"

"Chet and Lorenzo?" Jack asked.

"It's the Geniuses... It was clearly them... How could it be anyone else?" Bonnie said.

 **End Interview**

Tom and Jen make it to the airport.

"We made it" Jen said. "And all we lost was the rug"

Dwayne and Junior looking beat up from the crash enter the airport.

"What happened to you two?" Tom asked.

"Craziest thing, we were hit by a carpet" Dwayne explained.

"Well... Yes... That sure is..." Jen said awkwardly. "We'll just go over here"

Her and Tom quickly excuse themselves. They join the other teams waiting for their plane.

"Twelve teams anxiously wait for flight two which is leaving in an hour and a half after the first flight" Don narrated. "But the first teams already on flight one have already landed in Paris"

Flight one lands and the Ice Dancers are the first ones out of the airport followed by the Cadets, Daters, Surfers, Reality TV Pros, Best Friends, Actors, and Geniuses. The teams get in their taxis and drive off to the Eiffel Tower.

At the Eiffel Tower the first team there is Josee and Jacques.

"Yes! We're in first!" Josee cheered.

Suddenly another car rear ends them.

"What was that?" Jacques asked.

The camera moves to the outside to reveal the Police Cadets' cab.

"Nailed it!" MacArthur said happily.

The camera pans over to Don standing next to a one ear French artist.

"This challenge is a Botch or Watch. Which ever team member didn't eat the Moroccan stew has to draw a caricature of their partner" Don explained. "Once the picture is approved by this local artist they will receive their next travel tip"

Don gives the artist a weird look.

"What happened to your ear?" Don asked.

The artist just ignored him.

The rest of the teams arrive except for the Actors who seem to be missing for some reason. The flight one teams start drawing. Josee strikes a pose.

"Don't move so much" Jacques complained.

"I'm trying to look good for the camera" Josee said.

"Okay bro, do a cool pose" Geoff said.

Brody flexes his muscles.

"Awesome" Geoff said.

Back at the airport flight two lands.

"Now that all the teams are here the excitement really begins" Don narrated as the flight two teams ran to the taxis.

Cut back to Geoff sketching Brody.

"And I'm done" Geoff said.

"Thank God" Brody said.

Brody hands the artist a badly drawn picture of Brody with big muscles.

The artist gives him a thumbs up and hands them their tip.

"This just says some weird stuff about underground cheese..." Geoff said.

A rat runs across the ground and into an open sewer hole.

"Follow that rat!" Brody cheered.

Cut to the Parisian catacombs where Don is.

"The catacombs where the French buried victims of the plague back in the good old days" Don said. "Teams must make their way through the catacombs and to a wheel of cheese on the other side where the next travel tip is located"

Meanwhile Tom and Jen are riding their taxi.

"We're doing surprisingly well" Tom said.

"Don't tempt fate Tom" Jen said.

Another taxi crashes into their taxi.

"Sorry..." Tom said.

Both of them step out of the taxi to see Lucy and Judy.

"Sorry, did we do that" Judy said.

"Don't worry" Jen said.

"Jen, we crashed, we're in Paris, and there is a boutique next to us" Tom said. "It's our destiny"

"Or a test of will" Jen said.

"It will take forever to get a new taxi" Tom added.

"Your right! Let's go!" Jen said.

Both of them run off.

"Those two have a point" Lucy said. "I see a cheese shop across the street"

"Okay, sounds like a plan" Judy said.

Both of them leave to.

Back at the tower Carrie shows her picture to the artist.

The artist gives her a thumbs down.

"What do you mean he got an A in art class" Devin said.

The artist turns the picture around to show a picture of Devin without a shirt and surrounded by angels and flowers.

"Oh I get it" Devin said. "It's to realistic"

The artist facepalms.

Pan over to Emma reading a book on law while Kitty sketches her.

"So do you have any boyfriends?" Kitty asked.

"Yeah his name is focusing on getting a law degree" Emma answered.

"You aren't very fun" Kitty said.

 **Team Interview**

"Emma's always been the serious one" Kitty said. "But ever since her boyfriend Jake dumped her two years ago she's been a little-"

Kitty is interrupted by Emma putting her hand over her mouth.

"Fine! I've been just fine" Emma finished. "I don't need a boyfriend I need my law degree and my kid sister to start pulling her own weight"

"And a boyfriend" Kitty added.

 **End Interview**

Pan over to the Geniuses and Cousins.

"Hey, uh, weren't you and your partner in fifth?" Bonnie asked. "Why are you still here?"

"Me and Ellody are perfectionists" Mary answered. "We believe not finishing the job until it's done right"

"That kind of stuff could get you uh, you know, eliminated" Bonnie said. "Maybe we could be in an um... Alliance"

"You just want you use us don't you" Mary said.

"Wow... You're good" Bonnie said. "How did you know"

"You couldn't look me in the eyes, kept saying "Um" and "Uh", and wouldn't stop fidgeting" Mary answered.

"Mary, I'm done!" Ellody said.

Mary and Ellody leave.

"I need to keep trying..." Bonnie said.

Meanwhile on a country road the Actors taxi is lost.

"How are you lost you live in this country" Tracey complained.

"You two were the ones giving me directions" the driver said.

"Turn around and go to the left. No right! Left!" Lewis demanded.

The driver gets confused and crashes into a nearby tree.

"You know what... We'll just walk from here" Lewis said.

"Here's your payment" Tracey said tossing a wad of cash at the driver.

Both of them quickly run out of the taxi.

Back at the tower the Adversity Twins, Father & Son, Magicians, Stepbrothers, and Mom and Daughter make it there.

"Don't worry Trevor, I already have a pencil" Melvin said producing a pencil from thin air.

"Where did you get that?" Trevor asked.

"I like to keep miscellaneous objects up my sleeves for spontaneous magic tricks" Melvin answered.

Mickey nervously reaches for the pencil.

"Come on Mickey show that pencil who's boss" Jay encouraged.

 **Team Interview**

"It was a normal Tuesday morning. Mickey's pencil case broke. He slipped on one and fell down the stairs landing on pencils the whole way down" Jay explained. "Long story short we had to go to the hospital and he's been afraid of them ever since"

"PENCILS!" Mickey shrieked in terror.

 **End Interview**

Noah shows his drawing to the artist. The picture is of Owen eating the Eiffel Tower. Noah and the artist start laughing.

"What's so funny?" Owen asked.

"Let's go" Noah said.

"But I wanted to see the picture" Owen said.

Meanwhile Gerry and Pete's taxi is aimlessly driving. It comes to a sudden halt when the driver sees a goat in the path. This causes Gerry and Pete to wake up.

"What?! Who?! Where are we?!" Gerry said.

"You old men never told me where to go" The driver said.

"Hey we're old but we're not stupid" Pete said.

"Eiffel Tower and hurry!" Gerry said.

Meanwhile Ryan and Stephanie are walking through the catacombs.

"If you got the plague I'd throw myself on top of your boil covered body so we'd die together" Ryan said.

"I don't know weather to find that attractive or disturbing" Stephanie said.

Ryan and Stephanie start making out.

Back above the ground more teams continue drawings.

"Do you want to look alive in this picture?" Ennui asked.

"I don't really care" Crimson said.

"Thank God I'm drawing" Taylor said. "I am the best in my class after all"

"You know Taylor I used to be an artist before I quit to have you" Kelly said.

"Not everything is about you" Taylor said.

Tom and Jen run up to the tower carrying shopping bags close behind them are Lucy and Judy carrying grocery bags.

"Come on let's hurry" Jen said.

Junior, Jack, Jay, and Carrie show their caricatures to the artist who gives them all thumbs up one by one. They all head down to the catacombs.

"I hope I don't get the plague again" Jay said nervously.

Four more cabs pull up. The Tennis Rivals, Actors, Rockers, and Vegans get out.

Below the ground Sanders and MacArthur are looking for the cheese. MacArthur is sniffing the air.

"What the Hell are you doing?" Sanders asked.

"I've worked border patrol" MacArthur said. "People think they can bring fuits and veggies wherever they want"

MacArthur runs into a nearby room followed by the sounds of crashing.

"What happened?" Sanders asked.

"It's okay... I ran into a pile of skulls" MacArthur said.

Back above the ground the Fashion Bloggers, Rockers, Magicians, Sisters, Stepbrothers, Chefs, and Mom & Duaghter finish the drawing portion of the challenge.

Back underground Jack and Bonnie are following Mary and Ellody.

"Are you still here?" Ellody asked. "Do you ever give up?"

"I'm as annoying as mosquito and as persistent as one" Bonnie answered.

"She is trust me" Jack said.

"Mary, so what if I tried to exploit you? Me and Jack will be valuable allies for you and your friend" Bonnie said.

"I'm thinking about it..." Mary said. "Ellody can I talk with you for a second?"

Mary and Ellody walk ahead of Jack and Bonnie.

"Ellody, they brought up a good point" Mary said. "You spent almost two hours on that drawing"

"Okay, I know what to do" Ellody said.

Mary and Ellody go back to Bonnie and Jack.

"Tell you what, we'll help you out of the catacombs and if you help us in return we might consider being in an alliance" Ellody said.

"It's a deal" Bonnie said.

"Good, we know the way out. We like to study maps in our spare time" Mary said.

"You must be fun at parties" Bonnie said.

Meanwhile Geoff and Brody hit a dead end.

"Dude, it seems like all these paths lead to nowhere" Brody said.

"Don't worry bro, if we find all the dead ends the only path left will be the right one" Geoff said.

 **Team Interview**

"Geoff and I are glass half full kind of guys" Brody said.

"But since there are two of us it's a full glass" Geoff said.

"Take that science!" Brody cheered.

 **End Interview**

Dwayne and Junior are looking around.

"Dad, these skulls are freaking me out" Junior said.

"Don't worry they've been dead for hundreds of years" Dwayne said.

"That doesn't make me feel better" Junior said.

Meanwhile Judy and Lucy are struggling to carry their heavy grocery bags.

"My arms are getting tired" Lucy complained.

"It's worth it to have all this delicious cheese and bread" Judy said.

Both of them notice that they are surrounded by rats.

"What's going on?" Lucy asked.

"I think they want the cheese" Judy said.

"I spent lots of money on this" Lucy said.

"Just give them one wheel" Judy said. "I think they'll kill us if we don't"

Lucy tosses one wheel of cheese to the side and the rats go after it.

"Run!" Judy yelled.

Both of them start running away.

Back on the surface the Vegans, Actors, and Tennis Rivals complete the challenge.

 **Team Interview**

"Our plan is to follow those veggie brained animal lovers to the cheese and then zoom past them" Pete said.

"They don't eat any steak it'll be easy to overpower them" Gerry said.

 **End Interview**

Back down in the catacombs Jay and Mickey are running as fast as they can. Two shadowy figures step in their path.

"Don't kill us!" Jay pleaded.

The figures step forward to reveal Crimson and Ennui.

"Oh... Sorry about that. You scared us" Mickey said. "It's kind of creepy down here"

"I personally like it" Ennui said.

"This place could be an amusement park or a camp for kids" Crimson said.

Meanwhile MacArthur continues to sniff the air.

"We're getting close" MacArthur said.

"Do you hear running water?" Sanders asked.

They run through a passageway to see several large wheels of cheese stacked on top of each other.

"Alright!" MacArthur cheered.

Josee and Jacques come up behind them.

"Well if it isn't out world class silver medallists" MacArthur taunted.

Josee angrily kicks down a pile of cheese revealing a sign.

"I hate silver!" Josee said angrily.

Jacques goes up to the sign and takes a good look at it.

"It say we have to float this cheese to the Louvre" Jacques said.

Cut to Don standing outside of the Louvre.

"The Louvre home to many paintings I was told to stop touching" Don said. "It's also today's Chill Zone. The last team here may be eliminated"

Cut back to Josee and Jacques jumping on to the cheese float.

"Hey Ice Dancers, you forgot your oars" MacArthur said holding up the Ice Dancers' oars.

"Jacques, you were supposed to grab the oars" Josee said through gritted teeth.

Sanders and MacArthur paddle past them.

Back in the Catacombs the Tennis Rivals and Actors are following the Vegans.

"Are you following us?" Laurie asked.

"No we're just going in the same direction" Pete said.

"Hey, I recognize you" Lewis said to Gerry. "When I was a kid I used to watch your games on TV all the time. You were my childhood role model... Wow, I am old..."

"At least you still have all your teeth" Gerry said. "Pete knows a place that can hook you up with some great dentures"

Meanwhile Tom and Jen are disgusted by all the skulls.

"Ew... It is like so gross down here" Tom said.

"I know right" Jen said. "Do you think these skulls are still infected"

"I hope not. That would be totally disgusting" Tom said.

An ominous shadows looms over them.

"Run!" Jen yelled. "I don't want to be eaten!"

Tom and Jen run away. After they leave the shadow gets closer to reveal that it's a rat.

Meanwhile at the canal the Best Friends are getting on their cheese floats.

"Come on Carrie! I'll catch you!" Devin said.

Carrie jumps down and into Devins arms.

"Thank you" Carrie said.

Carrie leans closer to Devin.

"What are you doing?" Devin asked.

"Oh, I thought there was something on your face" Carrie said. Carrie and Devin start paddling.

Close behind them is Kelly and Taylor. Kelly is the only one rowing.

"Taylor, do you mind doing a bit of rowing?" Kelly politely asked.

"And ruin my manicure. No way" Taylor said.

Pan behind them to see the Goths who aren't rowing.

"Do you think we should row?" Crimson asked.

"We have a lead. There isn't much point" Ennui.

Back at the beginning of the canal. Ryan and Stephanie get on their cheese.

"Let's go!" Ryan cheered.

"Did you remember the paddles?" Stephanie asked.

"Be right back" Ryan said.

Ryan climbs back up and grabs the oars.

"That was close babe" Ryan said.

Ryan and Stephanie row away. Jay and Mickey are the next ones there.

"Gah! Cheese!" Jay exclaimed.

 **Team Interview**

"We have a very rare dairy allergy" Mickey said.

"Even touching it gives us a really bad rash" Jay said.

 **End Interview**

"Let's just swim" Mickey said. "It'll probably be faster"

Jay and Mickety jump in the water.

At the front of the canal Sanders and MacArthur are in the lead. Josee and Jacques catch up to them by using their legs to propel themselves forward.

"What is wrong with them?" Sanders said.

 **Team Interview**

"Missing paddles can't stop us" Josee said.

"We've been in worse situations" Jacques said.

"Like when Jacques got rabies from a squirrel" Josee said.

"My doctor said I shouldn't have gone on the ice. But I just dressed as a Saint Bernard so all foam coming from my mouth made sense" Jacques explained.

"Adapting, it's what we do" Josee said proudly.

"I still think I should have seen my doctor" Jacques said.

 **End Interview**

Back at the start of the canal the Sisters, Magicians, Father & Son and Surfers make it out.

"We finally made it" Emma said. "We would have made it faster if you hadn't stop to take pictures off all those skulls"

"Sorry they looked cool" Kitty said.

Emma and Kitty get on their float.

"Isn't this just the coolest trip so far sport?" Dwayne asked.

"Dad, let's just get on the cheese float" Junior said.

They get on their float. Melvin and Trevor get on to their float next.

"Did you get the oars?" Trevor asked.

Melvin takes an oar out of his sleeve.

"Where do you keep these things?" Trevor asked.

"I always wear a jacket two sizes bigger than what I actually need" Melvin answered.

"Alrigh dude we made it. That took forever" Brody said.

"We still have lots of time bro" Geoff said.

Geoff and Brody get on their cheese float. The Geniuses and Cousins make it there next.

"Are we the last ones?" Ellody asked.

"I don't think so" Mary said. "But we should hurry anyway"

Mary and Ellody get on their cheese float and it floats away from the platform.

"Did you grab the oars?" Mary asked.

"I thought you did" Ellody said.

"Here!" Jack said tossing them their oars.

 **Team Interview**

"Why did you do that?!" Bonnie asked. "They lead us out of there we got what we wanted"

"They said that they woud be part of an alliance if we helped them out" Jack explained.

"I wasn't actually going to help them" Bonnie said. "Just get what we needed and ditch them"

"You were going to kill them and hide their bodies in a ditch!" Jack exclaimed. "Oh... Not literally"

"Are you sure we're related?" Bonnie asked.

 **End Interview**

Back in the catacombs the Vegans, Actors, and Tennis Rivals are looking for the exit.

"Most of the teams have found the cheese but those left in the catacombs will have a hard time getting back on their feet" Don narrated.

"Lewis where are we going?" Tracey asked.

"I was just following Gerry and Pete" Lewis answered.

"We were following Laurie and Miles" Pete said.

"You said you weren't following us" Miles said.

"We lied" Gerry said.

 **Team Interview**

"We thought vegans would sniff out cheese in a second" Gerry said.

"At this point we'll be lucky to get a deal for tube socks, and I hate tube sock. You never know where to put your heel" Pete complained.

"Well you can say bye to that sponsorship" Gerry said.

They both laugh at their own joke.

 **End Interview**

Back at the start of the canal Owen and Noah make it out.

"That took way to long" Noah said.

Noah goes over to the sign.

"Okay, I'll take the oars and you take the cheese" Noah said.

Noah looks back and sees that Owen has taken a bite out of the cheese wheel.

"Why am I not surprised by this?" Noah asked.

"What? It's delicious?" Owen said.

Meanwhile at the end of the canal Josee and Jacques make it out first. They wave to the camera.

"Hello fans!" Josee said.

While they are waving Sanders and MacArthur pass them. Both teams push their cheese wheels up the stairs.

"Go! I'm not losing to these ice freaks" MacArthur said.

Sanders and MacArthur make it to the Carpet of Completion first followed by Josee and Jacques.

"Sanders and MacArthurs you win first place" Don announced.

"Jacques... I want to punch something" Josee said angrily.

Jacques backs away from her.

Back in the canal Owen and Noah are balancing on half a cheese wheel.

"Owen! Stop eating out float!" Noah said angrily.

"Sorry. This stuff is really good" Owen said. Owen takes another bite out of the cheese wheel.

Behind them are Ryan and Stephanie.

"Time to kick this thing in to overtime" Ryan said.

Ryan tosses his oar into the air but on the way down it misses his hand and floats away.

"Umm... Stephanie, could you hand me your oar?" Ryan asked.

Stephanie tosses her oar over to Ryan who fails to grab it.

"Ooops... Sorry" Ryan said.

 **Team Inteview**

"I'm sorry I let you down babe" Ryan said.

"It's fine sugarplum" Stephanie said. "Just don't let it happen EVER, again..."

Ryan steps away from Stephanie.

 **End Interview**

Back at the start of the canal the Chefs and Fashion Bloggers are getting on their cheese floats.

"Judy, there isn't enough room for you" Lucy said.

"Dump one of the bags" Judy said.

"No way" Lucy said.

"We just started I don't want to go home now" Judy said.

"Fine" Lucy said.

Lucy kicks one grocery bag overboard.

Judy hops on and starts rowing.

Tom is very carefully balancing on the cheese wheel.

"Is there enough room" Jen asked. "I don't want the clothes to get wet"

"I have everything under controll" Tom said. "But... You're going to have to swim"

"I'll do it: For fashion" Jen said.

Back at the Carpet of Completion Geoff and Brody make it there next.

"Surfers, you are in third" Don announced.

"Awesome!" Geoff cheered.

The screen cuts to black.

"Fourth!" A picture of Carrie and Devin is shown.

"Fifth!" Dwayne and Junior are shown next.

"Sixth!" Chet and Lorenzo are shown after that.

Back at the start of the canal the Actors, Rockers, Tennis Rivals, and Vegans jump on their cheese wheels.

"Hey hippies, when you go home be sure to get a real job" Pete taunted.

"Yeah, and a haircut" Gerry added.

 **Team Interview**

"The thing is age is all in your head" Gerry said. "And your joints"

"And it has a lot to do with the year you were born" Pete added.

 **End Interview**

Cut back to black screen.

"Seventh" A pictue of Ryan and Stephanie appears.

"Eighth" Followed by a picture of Mary and Ellody.

"Ninth" Next to that is a picture of Jack and Bonnie.

"And the Sisters in tenth" A picture of Emma and Kitty shows up.

Cut back to Don standing by the Carpet of Completion. The Reality TV Pros and Adversity Twins run up to Don.

"Hold up!" Don said. "Twenty minuet penalty for both of you"

"What why?" Owen asked.

"We completed the challenge" Mickey said.

"You were supposed to wheel your cheese to the me" Don said. "I don't see any cheese"

"We would have had an allergic reaction" Jay explained.

"But I ate the cheese! I am cheese!" Owen said.

"Okay... Tell you what since Owen has a point I'll chop ten minuets off your penalty" Don said. "Jay, Mickey, you still have to wait the full twenty"

Cut back to a black screen.

"Eleventh!" A picture of Kelly and Taylor is shown.

"Twelfth!" A picture of Melvin and Trevor appears.

"Thirteenth!" A picture of Crimson and Ennui appears next to theirs.

"Fourteenth!" Tom and Jen are shown.

"Fifteenth!" Judy and Lucy are shown.

Cut back to Don at the carpet of completion.

"Noah and Owen, your penalty is up" Don announced.

Owen and Noah run to the carpet of completion.

"You now have sixteenth place" Don said.

Back in the canal the Tennis Rivals, Vegans, Actors, and Rockers are rowing.

"There are five teams not yet across the carper" Don narrated. "The race is on to not come on last"

"How did we go from being on the first flight to being all the way back here?" Tracey complained.

"Personally I blame this city's taxi service" Lewis said.

"Spud! Can you help me row?" Rock asked.

"I don't really feel like it" Spud said.

"We can turn this cheese into nachos when we get there" Rock said.

"Alright!" Spud cheered.

Spud picks up and oar and starts rowing. Laurie and Miles row right past Gerry and Pete.

"How are those hippies beating us?" Pete asked.

"I don't know? We're actual athletes!" Gerry said.

Back at the carpet of completion Jay and Mickey are pacing.

"How much longer do we have?" Jay asked.

"I don't know" Mickey answered.

"You have five minuets" Don answered. "But you'd better hurry, the Actors are catching up"

Lewis and Tracey make it to the carpet.

"You are in seventeenth" Don announced.

The Vegans make it to the carpet next followed by the Rockers.

"Eighteenth and Nineteenth" Don said.

Back at the end of the canal Gerry and Pete are lifting their cheese wheel up the stairs.

"Lift with your back not your legs" Pete instructed.

"I thought it was the other way around" Gerry said.

"I'm pretty sure you lift with your back" Pete said.

Pete's hands slip and the cheese wheel runs Gerry over.

"I'm okay..." Gerry said weakly.

Back at the carpet.

"I think the Tennis Rivals are getting closer" Jay said.

Gerry and Pete wheel their cheese closer to the Carpet of Completion.

"Jay and Mickey, your penalty is up!" Don announced.

Gerry and Pete let go of their cheese wheel and run towards the carpet. They bump into Jay and Mickey. Both teams land on the Carpet of Completion.

"What happened?" Jay asked.

"I think it's a tie" Pete said. "We all stay"

"Not so fast" Don said. "Gerry, your foot isn't on the carpet completely. You both are eliminated"

Gerry gets up.

"What! Do you need glasses!" Gerry said. "My foot was in!"

"I don't need glasses and it was out" Don said.

"It was in!" Gerry insisted.

"It was out!" Don argued.

"IN!" Gerry yelled.

"Do I need to call security on you two?" Don asked.

Clips of Gerry and Pete play while they narrate over them.

"That went really poorly" Gerry said over a slip of him pushing Pete off the zipline.

"At least we weren't the first ones out" Pete narrated as a clip of them climbing out of Lake Ontario played.

"Hey if anyone out there needs a pitch man for those bathtubs with the doors so you don't have to step over call my agent" Gerry said over a clip of them carrying the cheese wheel up the stairs.

"Who's your agent?" Pete asked as the scene changed to them floating down the canal on their cheese wheel.

"I don't know. It's been so long I can't remember" Gerry said.

* * *

 **I'm not one hundred percent sure making this fanfic was a good idea but I'm going to keep with it. Also I'm trying to give my characters screen time but not too much that they steal the spotlight. As for the elimination despite liking Gerry and Pete I couldn't think of much plot for either of them.**


	4. Mediterranean Homesick Blues

"Last time on the Ridonculous Race our teams had to test their artistic abilities before going down into the dark catacombs. Tom and Jen were more interested in the shopping than the actual game and Owen ate more cheese than humanly possible. The winners were Sanders and MacArthur. Gerry and Pete on the other hand lost big time. Who will lose today? They've all got potential. Stay tuned for: The Ridonculous Race!"

Don is standing outside the Paris Chill Zone.

"We are at the Lourve which is also today's starting point" Don said. "The teams will depart in the order they arrived in and make it to the train station where they will go to today's destination: Calanque de Maubois"

Josee and Jacques walk towards the Don Box.

"I said yesterdays winners" Don said. "You came in second"

Josee and Jacques walk away angrily.

"Yesterdays _real_ winners were Sanders and MacArthur" Don said.

Sanders and MacArthur walk over to the Don Box.

 **Team Interview**

"I've got my eyes on those Ice Dancers" MacArthur said.

"They're weird to say the least" Sanders said.

"Very weird" MacArthur said.

Sanders nods.

 **End Confessional**

Sanders presses the button on the Don Box and takes the travel tip.

"It say we need to take the train to Calanque de Maubois and search the train station for the next travel tip" Sanders said.

Cut to a picture with a French flag with a photo of the beach over it.

"Calanque de Maubois skirts the Mediterranean on the south of France" Don narrated. "It has sands so fine you want it to get in your shorts... That sounded weird... Did I mention the beaches are awesome? Because they are!"

More of the teams get their travel tips.

"Dude, we get to go to the beach!" Brody said.

"Awesome! I love beaches" Geoff said.

"Who doesn't" Brody said.

Meanwhile Sanders and MacArthur are trying to get a cab.

"Taxi!" Sanders yelled.

Several taxis pass by her.

"Why can't I get a cab?" Sanders asked. "Ten just passed us"

"Leave this work to the professionals" MacArthur said. "Professionals being me"

MacArthur takes out her badge and steps in the road.

"Everyone freeze!" MacArthur yelled.

This causes several crashes. MacArthur runs up to one of the taxis.

"I'm commandeering this vehicle!" MacArthur said.

The taxi driver gets out of his car.

"Sanders, I got us a cab" MacArthur said.

 **Team Interview**

"Sometimes MacArthur is a bit... Aggressive" Sanders said.

"I'm not aggressive!" MacArthur aggressively said. "Just kidding you need to chill out Sanders... Seriously! C _hill out!_ "

 **End Confessional**

Josee and Jacques are running down the street towards a subway station.

"The subway! It will be the fastest way to the station!" Josee said.

"Good idea!" Jacques said.

Josee and Jacques enter the train station. Behind them Geoff and Brody enter the subway as well.

 **Team Interview**

"We have the best plan ever" Brody said.

"Basically we just follow a smarter team" Geoff said.

"And everyone here is smarter than us" Brody said.

 **End Interview**

Back at the start Emma and Kitty take their travel tip.

"Yay! The beach! This will be fun" Kitty said.

"This won't be fun" Emma said. "Because this time we'll be in first"

Meanwhile Dwayne and Junior are running through the street. Dwayne looks tired out.

"You're doing great... I didn't except you to... Keep up with me" Dwayne said.

Junior ignores him and runs ahead of him. Dwayne runs in to a lamp post.

Behind them are Lewis and Tracey.

"Tracey, can we slow down?" Lewis asked. "I have leg cramp"

"We stopped two blocks ago" Tracey said. "Besides you need to get out any way"

"Can we take a cab?" Lewis asked.

"For the last time no" Tracey said. "I don't trust this city's taxis"

Lewis collapses from exhaustion.

"Okay fine. We'll take the stupid taxi" Tracey said.

Meanwhile Sanders and MacArthur are still driving.

"I see the train station!" Sanders said.

"Hang on, I've always wanted to do this" MacArthur said.

MacArthur spins the steering wheel around and the taxi spins in a circle. It ends up stops when it makes it to the curb. They get out of the taxi.

"Never do that again..." Sanders said.

At the train station the Ice Dancers, Police Cadets, Surfer Dudes, Father & Son, Best Friends, Stepbrothers, and Daters make it there first.

"The first seven teams make it on the train!" Don narrated. "The other teams are racing to make it on the next train south"

Meanwhile in Tom and Jen's taxi.

"The south of France is pretty much the best place in all of Europe" Jen said. "It's like Paris but with glossier lipstick"

"That reminds me..." Tom said.

Tom reaches in to his bag and pulls out a can of spray tan.

"Spray tan?" Tom asked.

"Of course" Jen said. "I thought you'd never ask"

Meanwhile in Mary and Ellody's taxi.

"Driver, here's a map with the fastest route to the train station" Mary said.

Mary hands the taxi driver a map of Paris with a bunch of numbers written on it.

"This is impossible to read" The driver said.

"It's very simple" Ellody said.

"This looks like techno jargon" The driver said.

 **Team Interview**

"We were never "Popular" in school" Ellody said. "But memorizing the street maps of every major city is just as fun as going to parties"

"... Or going on dates" Mary added. "Or being a cheerleader, or-"

"Our choices are paying off" Ellody said. "We can out think all the other teams"

 **End Interview**

Meanwhile Judy and Lucy are running through the streets.

"What kind of food do you think they'll have where we're going?" Lucy asked.

"Let's just focus on staying in the game and we think about food later" Judy said.

 **Team Interview**

"We need to start focusing more" Judy said. "Our love of food got us seriously delayed last time"

"Admittedly we probably should have saved cheese shopping until after the challenge" Lucy said.

 **End Interview**

Meanwhile in Emma and Kitty's taxi.

"Hey Em, how about we take a picture?" Kitty suggested.

"This isn't a vacation" Emma said. "We don't have the time"

"Come on it'll be fun" Kitty said.

Kitty puts her arm around Emma and snaps a picture of the both of them.

"Now can we focus?" Emma said.

Meanwhile in Calanque de Maubois the Ice Dancers, Police Cadets, Father & Son, Surfer Dudes, Best Friends, Stepbrothers, and Daters make it there first.

"The first seven teams have made it" Don said.

The teams grab a travel tip from the Don Box.

"This one's a Botch or Watch" Dwayne read. "Whose turn is it?"

"Yours" Junior answered. "What's the challenge?"

"It says we have to... Swim with sharks!" Dwayne read.

Cut to Don standing in a row boat surrounded by sharks.

"In this challenge whoever didn't draw the caricature in Paris has to get the travel tip off the fin of a great white shark" Don explained.

Suddenly one of the sharks jumps at Don.

"Okay I explained everything... Please get me out of here" Don said.

Cut back to the teams standing on the beach.

"I'll be back Carrie... Probably" Devin said.

"How come I had to eat a weird stew and now swim with sharks and all you did was draw a picture?" Chet asked.

"Because the world hates you" Lorenzo answered.

"If that sharks eats you I'd eat the shark so we'd be together forever" Stephanie said.

"That's gross... But somehow still attractive" Ryan said.

"Man I really dodged a bullet here" MacArthur said.

"You know I'm standing right next to you" Sanders said.

"Sorry... Just glad I'm not you..." MacArthur said.

In the water everyone is swimming to get the next travel tip. Dwayne is doing badly and just flailing his arms.

 **Team Interview**

"Turns out that swimming in shark invested waters is harder than it looks" Dwayne said.

 **End Interview**

Josee does a back flip over one of the sharks and grabs the travel tip.

"Yes!" Josee cheered.

"Wow she's good" Devin commented.

Devin swims towards a shark. Suddenly Brody jumps on top of the shark.

"Sorry dude!" Brody said. "I need this!"

"I'm just gonna go" Devin said.

"As the teams from team one battle with the top of the underwater food chain. Train two arrives" Don narrated.

Cut to the Geniuses, Sisters, Cousins, Mom & Daughter, Magicians, and Goths getting off the train. Each of them takes their travel tip.

"Sharks... Sounds fun" Ennui said.

"Sounds like I could die" Crimson said.

"Um... It's your turn to do the challenge right?" Trevor asked Melvin hopefully.

"Nice try" Melvin said.

Meanwhile underwater Devin is sneaking up behind a shark. Devin takes the tip from the shark. The shark turns around and starts chasing him. This causes Devin to drop the tip and it floats to the surface. Dwayne sees Devin's travel tip and pikcs it up.

 **Team Interview**

"I'm actually kind of proud of my dad" Junior said. "It's a lot harder to swim towards a shark than away from one"

"This isn't my first shark rodeo" Dwayne said. "If anything they should have been afraid of me"

"And now you killed it..." Junior said.

 **End Interview**

Bonnie is hesitating to get in to the water.

"Hey Jack... Do I really have to swim with those sharks?" Bonnie asked.

"It's what it says on the travel tip... So yes" Jack said.

The camera pans over to Kelly and Taylor.

"Mom! Stop stalling" Taylor said.

"Okay I just wanted to let you know that if I get eaten by those sharks I'm leaving my gold pocket watch to you" Kelly said.

"You have a watch" Taylor said.

"I just don't wear it. It's way too valuable" Kelly said.

"How old are you again?" Taylor asked.

"Nice try. You aren't getting that watch for a while" Kelly said.

Suddenly a huge yacht arrives at the beach.

"Who's yacht is that?" Don asked. "I don't remember authorizing a yacht for this challenge..."

Tom and Jen step off the yacht.

"Did anyone miss us?" Tom asked.

"Aren't you supposed to be on the third train?" Don asked.

"It's a long story" Jen said.

 **Team Interview**

"So we were waiting for our train when we saw the Prince of Monaco" Jen explained. "He said we liked outfits and asked where we were going"

"One thing leads to another and we end up ahead of the other teams and on a yacht with a prince" Tom said.

 **End Interview**

Dwayne is swimming towards the shore.

"Junior! Get a bucket! We need to build a sand castle!" Dwayne shouted.

Cut to Don standing on the shore.

"Dwayne may be a terrible swimmer but he's right" Don said. "For the second part of the challenge teams will have to build a sand replica of the Palace of Versailles"

Don walks up to a small kid with blond hair.

"When local sand castle prodigy Sandy McCastles, probably a fake name, decides their castle is good enough they will receive the next travel tip" Don explained.

Sanders climbs out of the water before collapsing on the beach.

"It's about time" MacArthur said. "I would have finished long ago if I was out there"

Back out with the sharks Devin finally grabs a travel tip.

"I finally got it!" Devin cheered. "And I'm alive!"

A shark rises from under Devin.

"Well this bites..." Devin said.

Trevor is being chases by a shark.

"Come on man! You wouldn't eat a magician?" Trevor said.

Trevor throws a rubber ball at the shark. This makes the shark angrier.

"This was a terrible idea!" Trevor yelled.

Two sharks are about to attack Mary. She holds up a magnet which causes the sharks to swim away. Mary takes a travel tip that fell off the shark.

 **Team Interview**

No, sharks aren't afraid of me" Mary said. "But they are afraid of magnets"

"Technically it isn't fear" Ellody said.

"Of course not. I wasn't being literal" Mary said. "Charged metals in water create an electrical field which disrupts a sharks electro-reception senses"

"We should explain" Ellody said. "Salt water is an ionic solution. It contains particals with unpaired electrons"

"I wish we had a dry erase board" Mary said.

"Speaking up dry can we cut to something else?" Don asked from off screen. "Anything?"

 **End Interview**

Emma is being chased by a shark.

"That's more like it" Don said.

At the train platform the third and final trains arrives and the Vegans, Reality TV Pros, Chefs, Adversity Twins, Actors, and Rockers get off the train. They take their travel tips.

"Okay so the bad news is that you have to swim with sharks" Noah said to Owen.

"What's the good news?" Owen asked.

"The good news is that I don't have to" Noah said.

"I sure hope we don't hurt the sharks" Laurie said.

"The only sharks I've starred with have been CGI" Lewis said. "This is going to be tough"

Cut to the Ice Dancers, Father & Son, and Best Friends building sand castles.

"As more teams begin the second challenge some struggle to complete the first" Don narrated.

Brody and Judy are being chased by a shark.

"Come on shark dude! At least chase me towards shore!" Brody yelled.

"I'm warning you! I know a great recipe for shark fin soup!" Judy threatened.

The sharks speeds up.

Closer to the shore Rock slowly gets in the water.

"Spud if I die you get to be lead singer of the band" Rock said.

"Cool... Wait who will be me?" Spud asked.

"You can decide... If I die" Rock said.

 **Team Interview**

"I really need the money. For my parents" Rock said. "They aren't getting any younger and they really want me to move out of the basement"

"Yeah if we win we can build out own basement" Spud said.

"I'm not sure that's how that works" Rock said.

 **End Interview**

A shark menacingly swims towards Crimson. Crimson glares at the shark. The shark swims away and drops the travel tip.

"Thanks..." Crimson said unenthusiastically.

Back closer to the shore Bonnie crawls out of the water

"Did you find the tip?" Jack asked.

"No I'm just taking a break..." Bonnie said.

"You can't do that" Jack said.

"Why not?" Bonnie asked.

"You never let me take breaks" Jack said.

"Okay fair point" Bonnie said.

Elsewhere on the beach more teams are building sand castles. Sanders and MacArthur are building a sand castle bigger than the rest.

"Are you sure it has to be this big?" Sanders asked.

"It's go big or go home" MacArthur said.

Emma overhears them.

"Hear that Kitty. We need to make this castle bigger" Emma said.

"Okay" Kitty said.

Mary and Ellody are drawing some calculations in the sand.

 **Team Interview**

"We're scientists" Ellody said. "We know how important the planning stage is"

"Agreed" Mary said. "Were building a sand castle. This isn't kids stuff"

 **End Inteview**

Sandy McCastles goes over to Dwayne and Juniors castle.

"What do you think?" Dwayne asked.

Sandy gives it a thumbs down.

"What do you mean. This is a great sand castle" Dwayne complained.

Sandy walks away.

"Hey come back here!" Dwayne said. "You little brat! I'll show you a thing or two about building sand castles!"

Back out in the ocean Owen picks up a floating travel tip.

"Yes!" Owen cheered. "I got the travel tip!"

Owen notices several fins circling him.

"Any chance you guys are dolphins?" Owen asked hopefully.

Jay is slowly approaching a shark from behind.

"Easy does it..." Jay said.

Jay takes the travel tip but angers the shark. The shark starts chasing him.

"Oh come on!" Jay complained.

Miles his hugging one of the sharks. Miles turns to the camera.

"If me and Laurie win the million I think I'll donate it to the preservation of these misunderstood creatures" Miles said.

She takes the travel tip from the sharks fin and the shark angrily glares at her.

 **Team Interview**

Miles now looks beat up.

"Sharks are now off my list of animals to save" Miles said.

"That sounds like a good idea" Laurie said.

"Yeah... Very good" Miles said.

 **End Interview**

Judy climbs on to the back of a shark and takes the travel tip.

"HA! Take that you stupid fish!" Judy taunted.

The shark bucks Judy off its back. Judy goes flying through the air and drops the tip. Tom picks up the travel tip.

"Well, today must be my lucky day" Tom said.

Back on the beach Dwayne and Junior have made a new sand castle. One that is much smaller.

"Okay where did that judge go?" Dwayne asked. "Hello? Tiny opinionated young man?"

Sandy walks up to Dwayne and hands him his next travel tip.

"Thanks" Junior said.

"It says we need to take a boat to... Iceland!" Dwayne read.

Cut to a dock in Iceland where the Chill Zone is. Don is standing on the docks.

"Iceland, the southernmost dock of this frigid island is the location of today's Chill Zone" Don explained. "The last team to make it to the Carpet of Completion could be heading home"

Cut back to the beach.

"Come on let's go dad" Junior said.

Dwayne and Junior run past the other teams and go over to the docks. MacArthur notices the size of Dwayne's sand castle.

"Hold the phone... It doesn't have to be this complicated" MacArthur said. "Why didn't anybody tell me?"

Over on the docks Dwayne and Junior get in a motor boat. Dwayne is having trouble getting the boat to start.

"Come on let's just get a different boat" Junior said.

"Don't worry I can fix it" Dwayne said.

Dwayne walks over to the motor and looks at it.

"It's all very simple" Dwayne said. "All you have to do is... Um..."

 **Team Interview**

"One summer my dad tried to attach a new bell to my bike" Junior said. "When he was done the wheels were gone... I don't know where they went"

"It was one of those Swedish bells. Very difficult. I had to take the whole darn bike apart" Dwayne said. "Hey, wasn't that the summer you walked everywhere?"

"Yes it was..." Junior said.

 **End Interview**

Dwayne and Junior jump in to another boat.

"I can not believe the first to boats we picked are broken" Dwayne said.

Dwayne tries to start this boat but it doesn't work either.

"You have to turn the key, _then_ press the start button" Junior said.

"Huh, must be one of those Swedish boats" Dwayne said.

Back by the shore Judy and Brody get out of the water.

"I'm okay..." Brody said weakly before falling over.

"I am going to eat so many sharks once this is done!" Judy said angrily.

"Don't worry, I'll help" Lucy said.

Over on the beach Sandy hands travel tips to Josee and Jacques as well as Tom and Jen. Both teams get their own boat. The Chefs, Best Friends, Police Cadets, Fashion Bloggers, and Stepbrothers get in their boats.

"I want to drive" Lorenzo said.

"No way!" Chet said.

"Let's switch every twelve seconds" Lorenzo said.

"Fine" Chet said.

Chet and Lorenzo leave.

"Okay, you promise not to terrify me with your driving?" Sanders asked.

"Oh don't get a heart attack grandma" MacArthur said.

MacArthur starts up the boat and leaves.

"We're back on track!" Judy said.

Judy tries to start up the boat but the motor starts smoking.

"What the- Why doesn't this want to start?" Lucy said.

Carrie and Devin speed past them.

"Woohoo!" Carrie cheered.

"No problem we can figure this out..." Lucy said.

Tom and Jen speed past them after that.

"Why won't you start you stupid boat!" Judy yelled angrily.

Judy angrily kicks the motor. This causes the boat to start.

"Huh, I guess violence solves my problems" Judy said.

"It doesn't" Lucy said.

Meanwhile in Iceland at the Chill Zone. Dwayne and Junior make it there first.

"Dwayne and Junior, you are the first ones here" Don said,

"Yes!" Junior cheered.

"But you get a twenty minuet penalty" Don said.

"What?!" Dwayne exclaimed.

"You broke a rule when you read the travel tip before reuniting with Junior" Don explained.

"What? Surely we can work out a deal" Dwayne said.

Dwayne hold out his wallet to Don. Dwayne takes a coupon out of his wallet.

"Look, you can get a free coffee at Tim Hortons" Dwayne said.

"Twenty minuet penalty" Don said.

"Well it was worth a shot..." Dwayne said.

Back in France the Sisters, Vegans, Magicians, Mom & Daughter, Adversity Twins, and Actors get in their boat. Over on the beach Sandy hands travel tips the Daters, Cousins, and Goths.

"Most teams finish the challenge" Don narrated. "But others get caught up on details.

Elsewhere on the beach Mary and Ellody finish writing their calculations in the sand.

"We've finished our calculations" Ellody said. "Now to build a perfect model with out data"

A wave suddenly washes away all their data.

"NO!"Ellody shouted.

"We'll have to just improvise" Mary said.

"I can't do that!" Ellody said. "It needs to be a perfect model"

Jack quickly runs up to them.

"Not to but in but I agree with Mary" Jack said.

"You don't understand!" Ellody said. "We need to get this right"

"Okay, well... I guess it's been nice knowing you" Jack said.

"Jack! Stop helping them!" Bonnie yelled from off screen.

"Gotta go!" Jack said.

"Do you think we should listen to him?" Mary asked.

"I don't want to make something imperfect... But on the other hand I don't want to go home" Ellody said.

 **Team Interview**

"Why do you keep helping those stupid geniuses!?" Bonnie asked.

"They look like they know what they're doing" Jack said.

Bonnie facepalms.

"We don't need help... and neither do they" Bonnie said.

"Why?" Jack asked.

"Why did I sign up with you again?" Bonnie asked.

"I'm the only one who wanted to listen to you" Jack answered.

"Oh... Right... Note to self: Get more friends" Bonnie asked.

 **End Interview**

Meanwhile in Iceland Jacques and Josee make it to the Carpet of Completion first.

"Jacques, Josee, you are in first" Don announced. "I was expecting you to flip out. Glad to see you kept it professional"

 **Team Interview**

Josee is holding up her lucky rabbits foot and blows kisses to the camera. Jacques is running in circles.

"YES! We're the best! Nothing can stop us!" Jacques cheered.

 **End Interview**

Tom and Jen walk to the Chill Zone.

"Tom and Jen, you are in second" Don said. "However you arrived at the beach by yacht instead of train. Twenty minuet penalty!"

"It was still worth it" Jen said.

"You're just jealous" Tom sad.

"No... No I'm not" Don said.

"You totally are" Tom said.

Noah and Owen are the next ones to the Chill Zone.

"Owen, Noah, you are in second place" Don announced.

 **Team Inteview**

"Yay!" Owen cheered.

Owen hugs Noah and squeezes all the air out of him.

"Please... Stop..." Noah said weakly.

 **End Interview**

Sanders and MacArthur make it to the Chill Zone.

"Third place!" Don said.

Sanders and MacArthur high five.

Carrie and Devin make it to the Chill Zone.

"Fourth Place!" Don said.

"Good job driving" Carrie said.

"Thanks Carrie" Devin said.

Back on the beach in France Geoff takes the travel tip from Sandy.

"Dude, I think we're in last" Brody said.

"Don't worry bro we can catch up" Geoff said.

Geoff and Brody both run off. Mary and Ellody finish building a small sand castles.

"Hey kid!" Mary said. "Did we do good enough?"

Sandy shrugs and gives them the last travel tip.

"Come on let's go!" Ellody said.

Mary and Ellody get in the last boat.

Meanwhile out in the middle of the ocean Judy and Lucy's boat breaks down.

"Damn! Not again!" Lucy said.

"Is there a tool box anywhere?" Judy asked.

"Let me see" Lucy said.

Lucy looks around and finds one under her seat.

"Okay, I think I know what to do" Lucy said.

Lucy takes a wrench out of the tool box and gets ready to hit the motor.

"Whoa! Whoa! Isn't that dangerous?" Judy said.

"You kicked it to get it to work just earlier" Lucy said. "Besides, what's the worst that could happen?"

Lucy hits the motor and the boat starts up again.

"See. What did I tell you" Lucy said.

The boat then explodes and sends them both flying in to the air.

"Damn it Lucy!" Judy yelled as they flew.

Meanwhile in Iceland Dwayne and Juniors penalty ends and they make it across the Carpet of Completion.

"Fifth!" Don announced.

Shortly after that Tom and Jen's penalty ends and they make it to the carpet of completion.

"Sixth!" Don announced.

Ryan and Stephanie run to the Chill Zone.

"Seventh!" Don said.

Chet and Lorenzo make it to the Chill Zone next followed by Crimson and Ennui.

"Eighth and Ninth" Don said.

The next two teams across the line are the Sisters and Magicians.

"Tenth and Eleventh" Don announced.

"We're in the exact same place as before! How is that possible?" Emma complained.

"I'm sure thing will get better" Kitty said.

"They'd better" Emma said.

"Yes! We're getting better at this" Melvin said.

Two Hawaiian shirted tourists walk to the Chill Zone.

"Who are you people? Are you with us?" Don asked. "I don't want to have to call security"

The tourists quickly leave. Jay and Mickey make it to the carpet.

"Twelfth!" Don said.

Kelly and Taylor make it there next. Followed by Laurie and Miles.

"Thirteenth and Fourteenth" Don said.

Rock and Spud cross the carpet next.

"Fifteenth!" Don announced.

Lewis and Tacey make it to the Carpet of Completion.

"Sixteenth!" Don said.

Bonnie and Jack are the next ones to the Chill Zone.

"Seventeenth!" Don said.

Meanwhile out in the ocean Geoff and Brody are racing against Mary and Ellody.

"Come on dude, we're almost there" Geoff said.

"I'm driving as fast as I can bro!" Brody said.

Mary and Ellody's boat starts breaking down.

"What's going on?" Mary asked.

"I think something's wrong with the motor" Ellody said. "I'll take a look at it"

Ellody walks over to the motor.

"I think I see the problem" Ellody said. "There's a disconnected wire. I just need to adjust it"

Ellody touches a part of the motor and electrocutes her. This causes the boat to start again. Ellody lets go of the motor.

"Ellody, do that again" Mary said.

"Are you kidding! I need to fix this properly!" Ellody said.

"We don't have the time" Mary said.

"Okay, you're right" Ellody said.

Ellody touches the motor again and starts the boat up.

Back on the dock.

"You know I really think the Chill Zone needs a couch" Don said to someone off screen. "But not one of those tacky zebra print ones. Maybe one of those nice leather couches- Oh wait here they come"

Don sees that the last two boats have made it to the docks. Geoff and Brody make it to the Chill Zone first.

"Geoff, Brody, you have eighteenth place" Don said.

"Alright bro!" Geoff said.

"Awesome!" Brody cheered.

Mary and Ellody sadly walk to the Carpet of completion. Ellody is looking worn out, burnt, and her hair is sticking on end from the engine.

"It's okay Don, we know" Mary said. "Give us the bad news"

"Mary, Ellody, you are in... Second to last place!" Don announced. "AKA nineteenth place, AKA still in the race!"

"Yes!" Mary cheered. "Hear that Ellody!?"

Mary hugs Ellody but is electrocuted.

"Ow..." Mary said. "Wait, who's in last then?"

Judy and Lucy climb out of the water and on to the docks.

"What did I say?!" Judy angrily asked.

"I shouldn't hit the motor..." Lucy said.

"And what did you do?!" Judy said.

"I hit the motor..." Lucy said.

Don walks up to both of them.

"Judy, Lucy, your time on this show has come to an end" Don said.

"I figured" Judy said.

"I hope you two enjoyed your time on the show" Don said. "Also you need to pay for that boat you blew up"

Judy and Lucy start running away.

"Damn it" Don said.

Clips of Judy and Lucy play while they narrate over it.

"I guess we really should have focused more on the game" Lucy said over a clip of them crashing their moped in Morocco.

"On the bright side we had some great food" Judy said over a clip of them carrying bags of French cheese in the catacombs.

"Yeah, that cheese was good" Lucy said over a clip of Judy trying to eat the Moroccan stew.

"Want to see if there's a place here that serves shark?" Judy asked as the footage switched to them walking down the street and into the sunset.

"You know I do" Lucy said.

* * *

 **And now for the first major difference. Mary and Ellody have an extended roll. Why Mary and Ellody you may ask. I think they're probably one of the teams that were eliminated early that I thought had the most plot potential. I decided to challenge myself by taking three teams that were eliminated early and give them more plot. They are one of them. As for the elimination Judy and Lucy were the most gimmicky of my OC's and I kind of just made them for a few jokes and to have a team to elimination instead of Mary and Ellody.**


	5. Bjorken Telephone

"Last time on the Ridonculous Race. Out teams got friendly with sharks... Some more than others. After building castles in the sand it was a boat race to Iceland. It looked like it was over for the Geniuses Mary and Ellody. But Judy and Lucy didn't think things through and ended up getting eliminated. Who won't think things through next? I don't know. But know stay tuned to fnd out on: The Ridonculous Race!"

Don is standing on the docks in Iceland.

"Welcome back to Iceland. Where today's starting line is yesterday's Chill Zone" Don explained. "Teams will be departing in the order they arrived in"

Josee and Jacques walk over to the Don Box and take their travel tip.

"It says we have to take a bus to a nearby geyser field" Josee said.

Cut to a background of the Iceland flag with a photo of the geyser field to accompany it.

"These geyser fields are part of a volcanic field tucked under a skimpy layer of salacious sinter" Don said. "Whatever that is. But I have been informed that it is indeed dangerous"

Cut to Josee and Jacques making it to the bus stop.

"Come on! Where's the bus" Jacques said. "Any longer and we'll lose out lead"

They look behind them to see the Police Cadets, Reality TV Pros, Best Friends, Fashion Bloggers, and Father & Son.

"Hi" Sanders said.

"Don't even think about getting on the bus before us!" Jacques said.

"You can't stop me from thinking it!" MacArthur said.

"Oh really?!" Josee said.

While they are arguing the bus pulls up behind them.

"Um... Guys, the bus" Noah said.

The teams run on to the bus.

Back on the docks Ryan and Stephanie take their travel tip.

"Some teams get their travel tips. But for others the fear and panic is clearly visible on their face" Don said.

Don gestures to Crimson and Ennui who have no emotion on their face.

"I said _fear and panic!_ FEAR AND PANIC!" Don said. "Come on guys work with me"

"AH!" Mickey screamed from off screen.

"That's better" Don said.

The camera pans over to show Mickey cowering in fear from a spider.

"SPIDER! Make it go away!" Mickey shouted.

 **Team Interview**

"I'm actually only mildly afraid of spiders" Mickey said. "If you thought that was bad you should see me around a werewolf"

 **End Interview**

Out in the geyser fields the first six teams make it there. The teams get off the bus.

"There's the Don Box!" Junior said.

Sanders and MacArthur make it to the Don Box first. Sanders takes the travel tip.

"It's an All In" Sanders read.

Cut to Don standing right next to a speaker box.

"In this challenge the teams must put their hand down on this speaker box to hear me say "Please give me my next travel tip" in Icelandic" Don said.

Don presses the button on the speaker box.

"Vinsamlegast gefa mer mina travel abending" The speaker box said.

"After that they must navigate through the geyser field" Don said.

Cut to Don standing next to a woman in a swan dress.

"And repeat the phrase to this Icelandic local" Don said. "Say it right you get the tip. Get it wrong... You have to go back to hear it again... What are you wearing?"

The local ignores him.

Back at the speaker box Sanders and MacArthur make it ther first. MacArthur presses the button.

"Vinsamlegast gefa mer mina travel abending" The speaker box said.

"You got that?" MacArthur asked.

"Yep" Sanders said.

Sanders and MacArthur said. Dwayne and Junior come up behind them.

"Dad, press the button" Junior said.

"No need to son. I was able to hear it. Now we can save time" Dwayne said.

 **Team Interview**

"My mind is like a steel trap" Dwayne said.

"Oh really? When's my birthday?" Junior asked.

"Um... Sometime in July?" Dwayne asked.

"October..." Junior answered.

 **End Interview**

The Police Cadets and Ice Dancers are navigating through the geyser field. The Cadets are ahead of them.

"I hope you like the taste of silver!" MacArthur taunted.

Dwayne and Junior are starting to catch up.

"Just follow my lead" Dwayne said.

 **Team Interview**

"All we have to do is time it right and we will be talking to that _beautiful_ swan lady" Dwayne said. "That is to say that I meant she has a nice dress... Honey I miss you!"

 **End Interview**

At the start of the geyser field the second bus arrives and the Daters, Stepbrothers, Sisters, Magicians, Adversity Twins, Goths, & Daughter, and Vegans get off the bus.

"Come on Kitty, this time we're getting first!" Emma said.

"Okay, just slow down a little" Kitty said.

"I like Iceland... It's a cold wasteland" Crimson said.

"That's so poetic" Ennui said.

Back at the bus stop the Surfer Dudes, Actors, Geniuses, Rockers, and Cousins are waiting for the bus.

"Most teams have already made it" Don narrated. "But the last five teams anxiously wait for their bus"

"I'm so ready for this bro, how about you?" Geoff asked.

"Totally" Brody said. "This is so much fun"

"Ellody, are you doing okay?" Mary asked.

Ellody looks a little dazed from being shocked by the speed boat in the last challenge.

"My brain tickles..." Ellody said weakly.

 **Team Interview**

"Ellody isn't looking too good" Mary said. "I'm assuming she absorbed a few too many watts of electricity from that speed boat"

Ellody twitches and few sparks fly off her hair.

"But it's too early in the game to give up" Mary said. "Besides, we're geniuses. I'm pretty sure we can handle this. Right Ellody?"

Mary puts her hand on Ellody's shoulder but is shocked.

 **End Interview**

Back in the Geyser field the Ice Dancers are the first ones to make it through. They run over to the Icelandic local.

"Vinsamlegast gefa mer mina travel abending" Josee said.

The local hands her the travel tip.

"It says to take the helicopter to Skaftafell National Park and find the next Don Box" Josee read.

Josee and Jacques run to a nearby helicopter.

"Josee and Jacques may be the first ones there. But the helicopter will only depart when six teams arrive" Don narrated.

Back in the geyser field Owen has gotten himself stuck in a geyser.

"Are you going to be okay?" Noah asked.

"Tell my parents I lived a good life!" Owen said.

The geyser erupts and launches him in to the air. Owen lands only to get his head stuck in another geyser.

"Oh wow it looks really cool down here" Owen said.

"Only you could manage this" Noah said.

At the end of the Geyser field Dwayne and Junior are trying to tell the phrase to the swan lady.

"Vensamseleleguest gefa mer grinkel travel... Something" Dwayne said.

The swan lady gives him a thumbs down.

"You gotta admit that your language is pretty silly" Dwayne said.

She gives Dwayne and unamused look.

 **Team Interview**

"I can not be expected to remember something I only heard once" Dwayne said.

"Are you kidding me!?" Junior said angrily.

 **End Interview**

Dwayne and Junior run back in to the geyser field. Laurie and Miles go over to the Swan Lady.

"Vinsamlegast gefa mer mina travel abending" Laurie said.

The swan lady hands them the travel tip.

 **Team Interview**

"I knew I had to get it right" Laurie said. "I didn't want to be culturally insensitive"

"That's how wars start" Miles said.

"And war is bad" Laurie said.

 **End Interview**

More teams are running to get across the geyser field. Melvin tries to jump across the geyser but the geyser erupts and he gets swept in to the air. Melvin falls at Trevor's feet.

"You okay Melvin?" Trevor asked.

"I can't feel my face..." Melvin said.

"Can you get up?" Trevor asked.

"Just give me a few minuets..." Melvin said.

Tom and Jen are running as fast as they can while holding their hands over their head.

 **Team Interview**

"That stuff is hot water. This top is cold wash only" Jen said.

"No one told me there would be _real_ danger!" Tom said.

 **End Interview**

Crimson and Ennui make it over to the swan lady. They notice Taylor standing next to the swan lady.

"Are you done yet?" Ennui asked.

"No! My mom messed up the phrase so I made her go back" Taylor explained.

"Vinsamlegast gefa mer mina travel abending" Crimson said.

The swan lady hands Crimson the travel tip.

Crimson and Ennui turn to the camera.

"All our favourite bands are from here" Ennui explained.

"We know a lot about the language" Crimson said.

Back at the start the actors leave.

"You got it memorized?" Tracey asked.

"Yes" Lewis said.

"Good" Tracey said.

Lewis and Tracey leave. Dwayne and Junior make it to the speaker box.

"Okay, this time I'll remember it" Dwayne said.

"Sure you will" Junior said.

"I will!" Dwayne said.

Back with the swan lady Chet and Lorenzo are arguing.

"I was supposed to remember the first part and you were supposed to remember the second!" Chet said.

"NO! It's the other way around!" Lorenzo argued.

Chet pushes Lorenzo. Lorenzo pushes him back. The swan lady pushes them both to the ground.

 **Team Interview**

"She's totally in to me" Chet said.

"You wish" Lorenzo said. "She's obviously in to me!"

 **End Interview**

Tom and Jen are the next ones to make it to the swan lady.

"Oh my God! That dress is absolutely fab" Tom said.

"Not to mention that you're hot enough to pull off the look" Jen said.

The swan lady hands them the travel tip.

"Thanks" Tom said.

Meanwhile at the start.

"Okay, I've got the phrase memorized" Mary said. "Are you feeling okay Ellody?"

"Why is everything upside down..." Ellody said weakly.

Mary and Ellody leave. Kelly makes it back to the speaker box.

"Finally... My legs are killing me" Kelly said.

Back at the end Noah and Owen go up to the swan lady.

"Finsamlegost gefa mer mena travel alfending" Owen said.

The swan lady shakes her head.

"Come on, let's go back" Noah said.

After that Sanders and MacArthur make it there.

"Vinsamlegast gefa mer mina travel abending" Sanders said.

The swan lady hands them their travel tip. Ryan and Stephanie make it there next.

 **Team Interview**

"We each memorized part of the phrase" Ryan explained.

"We like the share everything" Stephanie said. "Except for French fries. If he EVER touches my French fries, KABAM!"

"Um... Okay then" Ryan said.

 **End Interview**

"Vinsamlegast gefa mer-" Ryan began.

"mina travel abendeering" Stephanie finished.

The swan lady gives them a thumbs down.

 **Team Interview**

"You were so close babe" Ryan said.

"I know I was close! She should have given us the travel tip" Stephanie said angrily.

"It was just a mistake" Ryan said.

"There can't be mistakes! That's what love is!" Stephanie said.

Stephanie storms off.

 **End Interview**

Emma and Kitty are the next ones to talk to the swan lady.

"Vinsamlegast... Um..." Emma said trying to remember. "Gefa..."

"Mer mina travel abending" Kitty finished.

The swan lady hands them the travel tip.

"Next time don't interrupt me" Emma said.

"But I got it right" Kitty said.

"But you might not have" Emma said. "Let's just get on the helicopter"

Emma and Kitty make it in to the helicopter. After they get in the helicopter takes off.

"The first six teams are already in the air" Don narrated. "But the teams on the ground need to hurry"

Devin and Carrie are running across the field. Devin gets his foot stuck inside a crater.

"My foot's stuck!" Devin exclaimed.

Carrie tries to get Devins leg out.

"While the others struggle to finish the first challenge. The top six have already arrived" Don narrated.

Cut to the helicopter landing. Josee and Jacques get out of the helicopter first and make it to the Don Box. Jacques takes the travel tip.

"It's an Either Or. Feast or fossil... What does that mean?" Jacques said.

Cut to Don standing next to a table with several covered plates on it.

"The teams have two options in this challenge" Don explained. "Either eat a traditional Icelandic feast..."

Cut to Don standing in an icy cave.

"... Or retrieve one of the intact fossils embedded in the walls of this ice cave" Don said. "Once the task is complete teams must take their intact fossil or empty plate to the Chill Zone. The last one to meet me there will be out of the race"

Cut back to the teams. All the teams, minus Crimson and Ennui, take a pick axe and head off in to the cave.

"We'll take the feast..." Crimson said.

 **Team Interview**

"The others picked the fossil thing... So we didn't... Because whatever" Crimson said.

"Yeah..." Ennui said.

 **End Interview**

Ennui takes the lid off the plate to reveal a bunch of weird looking foods.

"This traditional Icelandic thanksgiving feast consists of putrefied shark, pickled herring, cured ram, broiled puffin and singed sheep head" Don said. "Jeez, what were they thankful for?!"

Crimson and Ennui ignore him.

"You two are like this a lot aren't you" Don said.

"Pretty much..." Crimson said.

Back with the swan lady. Jay and Mickey make it to her.

"Vinsamlegast gefa mer mina travel abending" Jay said.

She hands them the travel tip. After them Rock and Spud get to the swan lady.

"Vensauceymlegast gefa... Um" Rock said struggling. "Come on Spud, you heard it to"

"What... Dude, that was forever ago" Spud said.

"Okay, let me try again" Rock said. "Vinsamlegast... gefa mer mina... Um... travel abending"

The swan lady hands the travel tip to them.

"Alright! Rock n' Roll!" Rock cheered. "Let's go Spud!"

Carrie and Devin make it there next.

"Vinsamlegast gefa mer mina travel abending" Carrie said.

The swan lady hands them the tip.

Dwayne and Junior make it over to the swan lady again.

"Vinsamlegast gefa mer-" Junior began.

"Mina travel asdentding" Dwayne finished.

The swan lady suddenly slaps Dwayne.

 **Team Interview**

"What did you say to her?" Junior asked.

"I have no idea" Dwayne said.

 **End Interview**

Chet and Lorenzo go over to the swan lady.

"Vinsamlegast gefa mer mina travel abending" Lorenzo said.

The swan lady hands him the travel tip.

"Good job" Chet said.

"Did you just thank me?" Lorenzo asked.

"No... You fart head" Chet said.

Meanwhile back in the ice caves.

"Kitty, help me get this fossil loose" Emma said.

"Give me a second" Kitty said. "I'm taking pictures. This place is cool"

The camera pans over to Sanders and MacArthur.

"I found a fossil" Sanders said.

"Stand back!" MacArthur said.

MacArthur takes her pickaxe and tries to get the fossil out. The fossil crumbles.

"Jeez, for something that's been around for so long you think It'd be able to take a hit" MacArthur said.

The camera pans to Laurie and Miles humming and waving their hands at the fossil. Jacques and Josee pass by them and give them a weird look.

 **Team Interview**

"We decided to free the fossil with spiritual energy" Laurie said.

"We didn't want to use too much" Miles said. "We just wanted to free it... Not bring it back to life"

 **End Interview**

The Cousins and Surfer Dudes make it there next.

"Okay, I think I remember it" Brody said. "Vinsamlegast gefa-"

Brody is cut off by Bonnie pushing him to the side.

"Sorry, I'm going first" Bonnie said. "Ahem, vinsamlegast gefa mer mina travel abending"

The swan lady hands her the travel tip. The Cousins leave.

"Vinsamlegast gefa mer mina travel abending" Brody said.

The swan lady hand him the travel tip. Mary and Ellody make it there next.

"Vinsamlegast gefa mer mina travel abending" Mary said.

The swan lady gives her the travel tip.

"Thanks" Mary said. "Ellody, are you going to be okay?"

"No..." Ellody said weakly.

Mary and Ellody make it to the helicopter.

"The second helicopter has been filled and they're on their way to the ice caves" Don narrated.

Back in the ice cave Emma has cut out a block of ice with the fossil in it.

"Kitty help me with this" Emma said.

Kitty ignores her and takes a picture.

"Is this because what I said earlier?" Emma asked.

Kitty nods.

Cut back to the swan lady. Dwayne is still trying to get the phrase right.

"Mino travel... Nino travel... Moopy travel outstanding... Depantsing!" Dwayne said as he slowly lost his grip.

The swan lady shakes her head.

"Why is this so hard!" Dwayne yelled.

"Let's go back dad..." Junior said.

After Dwayne and Junior leave Melvin and Trevor make it over there.

"Vinsamlegast gefa mer mina travel abending" Trevor said.

The swan lady hands them the travel tip.

"Yes! Finally!" Trevor said. "You okay Melvin"

"My face is still numb..." Melvin said.

"Let's go, I'm tired of coming in so close to last" Trevor said.

After Melvin and Trevor leave Noah and Owen make it there next.

"Vinsamlegast gefa mer mina travel abending" Noah said.

They are given the travel tip.

"Yes!" Owen cheered.

After them Kelly makes it over there.

"Oh my God! What took you so long mom?!" Taylor asked. "I've been waiting here forever"

"I'm not what I used to be... Me legs are killing me..." Kelly said.

"Just say the thing" Taylor said.

"Vinsamlegast gefa mer mina travel abending" Kelly said.

They swan lady gives her the travel tip. Ryan and Stephanie make it to the swan lady next.

"Vinsamlegast gefa mer mina travel abending" Stephanie said.

They are given the travel tip.

"YES!" Stephanie cheered. "High five Ryan!"

Ryan put out his hand and Stephanie hits it.

"Ow..." Ryan said weakly.

After Ryan and Stephanie leave Lewis and Tracey make it there.

"Why did it take so long to get here..." Tracey complained.

"You were the one who took a break..." Lewis said.

"Shut up and say the phrase" Tracey said.

"Vinsamlegast gefa mer mina travel abending" Lewis said.

They are given the travel tip.

"The final helicopter is almost full... But Dwayne and Junior still haven't gotten the phrase right" Don narrated.

"Okay, this time I really think I have it right" Dwayne said. "Vonsemlogast-"

"Vinsamlegast gefa mer mina travel abending" Junior interrupted.

 **Team Interview**

"I just couldn't risk you- I mean us. Messing up again" Junior said.

"You were about to say you... Meaning me" Dwayne said.

"No..." Junior lied.

 **End Interview**

"Through the magical power of editing the helicopter has now landed" Don narrated.

The helicopter lands and the teams get off. They all go over to where they decide which challenge to take up.

"Yeah, we're doing the fossil one..." Taylor said.

"Agreed" Kelly said.

Kelly and Taylor run over to the cave where Dwayne and Junior already are.

"Dad, be careful. There's ice" Junior warned.

"I know" Dwayne said.

Dwayne trips over and slides over to a nearby rock. His picks axe lands right next to his face.

"Changed my mind... We're eating..." Taylor said.

Kelly nods in agreement.

 **Team Interview**

"If you had a face like mine you would not want a ice pick hitting you in the face" Taylor said.

 **End Interview**

Cut to the feast table with the Surfer Dudes, Goths, Magicans, Mom & Daughter, Reality TV Pros, Daters, Geniuses, and Rockers are eating.

"You know, this food is surprisingly good" Brody said.

"I know right" Geoff said.

"Trevor, remind me why we chose this?" Melvin asked.

"You said you liked exotic food" Trevor said.

"Well now I don't" Melvin said. "Turns out my judgement is better when it comes to magic"

Mary picks up a piece of herring and shoves it in Ellody's mouth.

 **Team Interview**

"Normally I would have chosen the other challenge" Mary said. "But with her being "Temporarily impaired" this should be a lot easier"

Mary puts her hand on Ellody's shoulder only to be electrocuted.

"I really need to stop doing that..." Mary said.

 **End Interview**

Rock seems to be the only one eating for his team.

"Hey! Eat something man!" Rock said to Spud.

"What... Oh I'm not really hungry" Spud said.

"That's not the point!" Rock said angrily.

The camera pans to Crimson and Ennui finishing their plate. They take their empty plate over to the Carpet of Completion.

"Wow, first place!" Don said.

They remain silent.

"That means you win! You're the winners!" Don said. "Really... No emotional reaction... Like, at all"

 **Team Interview**

"I am so excited to be in first place" Ennui said.

"Careful... You're dangerously close to changing your expression..." Crimson said.

"Thanks.." Ennui said.

 **End Interview**

"First place may be taken. But last is still up for grabs" Don said. "Here come more teams now"

Tom and Jen make it over to Don.

"Slow down" Don said. "You didn't actually complete the first challenge properly. You complimented the local's dress instead of using the phrase"

"So?" Tom asked. "It was a gorgeous dress"

"That means you get a thirty minuet penalty" Don said.

"That's unfair" Jen said.

"It's fair" Don said. "I know. The producers were very specific with the rules"

Josee and Jacques make it there next.

"Second place!" Don said.

After them Noah and Owen are the next ones to the Chill Zone.

"Third!" Don announced.

"Great... Is there a place I can throw up?" Noah asked. "Those sheep eyes aren't agreeing with me"

Meanwhile in the ice caves. Chet and Lorenzo are fighting over their pick axe.

"Gimmie! I want to get that fossil out!" Chet said.

"No way! You'll just mess it up!" Lorenzo said.

"No I won't!" Chet said.

The camera pans to Sanders and MacArthur. MacArthur is getting ready to swing her ice pick at the fossil.

"Whoa! Maybe I should get it out instead" Sanders said.

"Good call" MacArthur said.

The camera pans to Bonnie trying to get a fossil out of the ice.

"Why did you choose this challenge?" Jack asked. "The other one would have been over quicker"

"Yes but this one is easier" Bonnie said. "And you know what they say: Hard work never pays off, so choose the easy route"

The camera switches to Jack talking to the camera with Bonnie working in the background.

"I'm not very smart, I'll admit that" Jack said. "But I really don't understand Bonnie's logic. She always seems to think about herself before others. The only reason I don't tell her is that she doesn't have any other friends..."

The camera cuts to Jay and Mickey pushing a fossil encased in ice.

"My arms are aching" Jay complained.

"Don't worry we're almost out" Mickey said.

They both slip and the fossil starts sliding away. They chase after it. The fossil ends up near Emma and Kitty.

"Hey, could you give us out fossil back?" Mickey asked.

"Sure thing" Kitty said.

Kitty hands them their fossil.

"Need any help with it?" Kitty asked.

"No thanks" Jay said.

Jay and Mickey leave Emma and Kitty.

"Hey Kitty, quick question" Emma said. "Why do you help them but not me!?"

Kitty ignores her and takes a picture.

Elsewhere in the cave with Lewis and Tracey.

"Tracey, I'm going to get that fossil on the ceiling" Lewis said.

Lewis point to a fossil stuck on the ceiling.

"Or we could get one that isn't impossible to reach" Tracey said.

"No I've got this. It's just like in my movies" Lewis said.

"Didn't you have a stunt double?" Tracey asked.

"Yeah, but I watched him a lot" Lewis said.

Lewis takes a few steps and and starts running before slipping and falling on his back.

"God my spine! Changed my mind... We'll do it your way" Lewis said.

"That's what I thought" Tracey said.

Meanwhile Laurie and Miles are pushing their fossil out of the cave.

"My hands are so cold" Miles said.

"Let's take a break and thank the fossil spirits for guiding us" Laurie said.

"Good idea Laurie" Miles said.

Laurie and Miles let go of the fossil and close their eyes. While this is happening the the fossil slides away. The fossil ends up next to Dwayne and Junior.

"Well, this must be our lucky break" Dwayne said.

"Don't you think that this might already belong to someone" Junior said.

"What kind of an idiot would lose this?" Dwayne asked. "Besides, we're already falling behind"

"Okay... I guess you're right" Junior said.

Dwayne and Junior pick up the fossil and leave. After they leave Laurie and Miles frantically run in.

"Where is it?!" Miles said.

"I don't know" Laurie said.

They run over to Carrie and Devin.

"Excuse me have you seen a fossil?" Laurie asked. "We lost ours"

"Can't say we have" Devin said.

"It can't just disappear" Miles said. "Come on let's keep looking"

Back at the Chill Zone Geoff and Brody are the next team there.

"Fourth!" Don announced.

Ryan and Stephanie run over to the Chill Zone next.

"Fifth!" Don said.

"Yes!" Stephanie cheered.

She and Ryan start to make out.

"Could you at least do that somewhere else?" Don asked.

Kelly and Taylor run to the Chill Zone.

"You would be in sixth... But you get a one hour penalty" Don said.

"Wait what?" Taylor said.

"After messing up the phrase only Kelly went back when you both were supposed to" Don said.

"Nice going mom!" Taylor said.

"It was your idea to send me back!" Kelly said.

"I'm your daughter! You can't blame me!" Taylor said.

Mary and Ellody make it to the Chill Zone next.

"Sixth!" Don announced. "Is Ellody okay?"

"She just needs rest" Mary said.

Bonnie and Jack run to the Chill Zone.

"Seventh!" Don announced.

"See the easy way is the best way" Bonnie said.

Dwayne and Junior are the next ones to the Chill Zone.

"Eighth!" Don said.

"HOLD IT!" A voice from behind them said.

They turn around to see Laurie and Miles.

"You stole out fossil!" Laurie said.

"I knew it..." Junior said.

"Fine... I'll give it back" Dwayne said.

"Not so fast" Don said. "It's fair game to steal the fossil. You two have to go back and get another one"

"THE GODDESS OF KARMA WILL HAVE YOUR SOUL!" Laurie shouted at Dwayne.

"Laurie, remember to breath" Miles said. "You just need to be calm"

"I AM CALM!" Laurie shouted.

 **Team Interview**

"Meh, not the first time someone has cursed me... Long story" Dwayne said. "Luckily I don't believe in goddesses or karma... So I think I'm good"

 **End Interview**

"We won't be able to free another fossil in time" Laurie said. "We'll have to... Eat the feast"

"NO!" Miles shouted.

Miles falls to the ground. Laurie helps her up.

"Come on let's go" Laurie said.

"I'm not sure I can do it..." Miles said.

Laurie and Miles leave. After they leave Carrie and Devin get there.

"Ninth!" Don said.

Tom and Jen's penalty ends.

"Fashion Bloggers, your penalty is up!" Don announced.

"Finally" Tom said.

"You have tenth!" Don said.

Chet and Lorenzo are the next team there.

"Eleventh!" Don announced.

Emma pushes her fossil over to the carpet. Kitty just watches.

"Twelfth!" Don announced.

"Oh come on!" Emma complained.

Jay and Mickey are the next ones there.

"Thirteenth!" Don said.

Back at the feast table Laurie and Miles are eating while crying.

"I'm so sorry!" Laurie cried. "It'll all be worth it... Actually that last bite wasn't too bad..."

The camera pans over to the Magicians and Rockers.

"Whoa we'd better hurry" Spud said. "They're eating faster than us"

"They're eating faster than me!" Rock said angrily. "ME!"

"Okay Trevor, all we have to do is eat this sheep head..." Melvin said.

"Great... If you excuse me I'm going to throw up in a bush" Trevor said.

Trevor runs off quickly.

Back at the Chill Zone Sanders and and MacArthur make it there.

"Fourteenth!" Don said.

"Man that was close" MacArthur said.

Lewis and Tracey make it there after that.

"Fifteenth!" Don announced.

"Great..." Lewis said. "Quick question, do you have a back pillow?"

"No" Don said. "I'm not forty seven"

"I'll have you know I'm forty five... " Lewis said. "So not much of a difference"

"Hey Don, is our penalty over yet?" Taylor asked.

"Soon. But the other teams are catching up" Don said.

The camera pans over to the Rockers, Magicians, and Vegans running towards the Chill Zone holding their empty plates. Laurie and Miles make it there first.

"Sixteenth!" Don announced. "Also, Kelly, Taylor, your penalty is up"

Kelly and Taylor quickly step over the Carpet of Completion.

"Seventeenth!" Don said.

The Rockers and Magicians are racing towards the Chill Zone.

"Spud! Run faster!" Rock said.

"Hey man, I'm moving as fast as I can" Spud said.

Melvin and Trevor out run them and make it to the Chill Zone.

"Eighteenth!" Don said.

"I can feel my legs burning..." Trevor said.

Rock and Spud walk over to Don looking defeated.

"Rock, Spud, you are in last" Don said.

"Ah man... I guess we really screwed up" Spud said.

"You didn't do anything! That's why we lost" Rock said.

"I'm sorry man... I wanted to help" Spud said.

"Normally I'd send you home... But this is a non-elimination round!" Don announced.

"What! Alright!" Rock said.

"Sweet!" Spud said.

Don turns to the camera.

"Who will be the next ones to go home?" Do asked the camera. "My money's on them. But you'll have to stick around to find out in the next episode of: The Ridonculous Race"

* * *

 **I really liked writing this chapter. Not sure why, but I had a lot of fun with it. The biggest change is that Rock and Spud were in last instead of Laurie and Miles. I did this to start Rock and Spud's plot early because for the first several episodes they didn't do much.**


	6. Brazilian Pain-Forest

"Last time on the Ridonculous Race! Our teams got geysered in Iceland! What fun. Then they either had to chip out a fossil or enjoy a delicious Icelandic feast. Crimson and Ennui came in first but didn't seem to care. Laurie and Miles decided to go against their morals in order to stay in the game. In the end it looked like Spud may have cost him and Rock the race but luckily for them it was a non-elimination round. They're safe for now but one team won't be this time. This is: The Ridonculous Race!"

Don is standing at the Icelandic Chill Zone.

"Here in Iceland is today's starting line" Don said. "And yesterdays winners Crimson and Ennui get the first travel tip"

Ennui presses the button on the Don Box and takes the travel tip.

"Hmm... Brazil" Ennui read.

Cut to a background of the Brazilian flag accompanied by a picture of the rainforest.

"Sunny Brazil. Home to loud music, fine coffee, a really surreal Terry Gilliam movie and more things that keep me up at night" Don narrated.

Cut to Don standing on an airfield.

"The first eight teams will take a direct flight" Don explained. "The remaining teams will be leaving later on a flight full of farm animals. Here they come now"

The Ice Dancers, Goths, Reality TV Pros, Cousins, Father & Son, Surfer Dudes, Daters, and Geniuses run towards the plane.

"Good thing we aren't on the other plane" Dwayne said. "And it's all thanks to this fossil"

Dwayne hold up the fossil.

"Kept it as a present for your mom" Dwayne said.

"I still kind of feel bad about taking it" Junior said.

"We didn't know it belonged to those hippies" Dwayne said. "And besides you know what they say: Happy wife, happy life"

The fossil slips out of his hands and shatters on the ground.

"Shoot..." Dwayne said.

Dwayne and Junior board the plane. Owen and Noah are sitting in the corner. Owen is chewing on Beary's ear.

 **Team Interview**

"To say the least Owen is a little nervous" Noah said. "To say the most he's terrified out of his wits"

 **End Interview**

"Wait where's Beary?" Owen asked.

"You ate him" Noah said flatly.

"Can I hold you?" Owen asked.

"Please don't" Noah said.

Owen ignores him and hugs Noah tight.

The camera pans over to Josee and Jacques sulking.

 **Team Interview**

"We came in second in Iceland... _Ice-_ land" Jacques said.

"It's unacceptable" Josee said. "Last time I was this upset about where I placed I got a new partner"

 **End Interview**

The camera pans over to Bonnie talking to Mary and Ellody.

"Hi guys. I'd like to talk about renewing out alliance" Bonnie said. "Turns out Jack is as smart as a boulder, I'm as charming as an eel, and we both move as slow as molasses. We need your help"

"Really. After you've been doing nothing but intentionally ignoring us" Ellody said.

"Why would we want to work with you?" Mary asked.

"Because you're nice people..." Bonnie said. "Also, JACK, wouldn't stop pestering me about it..."

"Are you okay?" Mary asked.

"Fine, just fine" Bonnie said.

"She's like this a lot" Jack said.

 **Team Interview**

"We've decided that an alliance would be a good idea" Ellody said. "Bonnie's lack of morality may be useful"

"Also we're one hundred percent sure that neither of them is competent enough to manipulate us" Mary said.

 **End Interview**

"It's a deal" Mary said.

"Good" Bonnie said.

Cut to the outside of the plane as it goes down the runway.

"Plane two begins to fill up while plane one takes off" Don narrated.

While going across the runway the plane runs over the shards from Dwayne's fossil and gets a flat.

Inside the plane everyone shakes from the flat.

"Ladies and gentlemen we'll be delayed due to a flat" The pilot said through the intercom. "We ran over a sharp object"

Junior facepalms.

Cut to the airfield where the second plane takes off first.

"In an interesting reversal yesterdays winners are now falling behind" Don narrated. "Flight number two is in the air. On its way to Brazil"

The camera changes to the inside of the plane.

"I am so not doing this" Taylor complained.

"Oh come on it's not so bad" Kelly said. "It's just a cow... Think of it as giant steak"

 **Team Interview**

"Back home all my friends said we'd be the first ones to go" Kelly said. "But guess what we made it and we aren't quitters"

 **End Interview**

"Yeah, I'm quitting" Taylor said.

Taylor angrily kicks a goat and storms off.

"If you stay I'll buy you a car" Kelly said.

"Deal" Taylor said.

The same goat from before suddenly head butts her.

"I am _not_ okay..." Taylor said weakly.

The camera pans over to Laurie and Miles looking at some sheep.

"I ate the sheep's head back in Iceland..." Laurie said. "But I did it to stay in the game"

Laurie hugs one of the sheep.

"I'm sorry sheep!" Laurie said.

"Laurie, sheep don't talk" Miles said. "If we want to win that money to help the animals of the world maybe a few can get hurt"

"What?! That's crazy" Laurie said.

"It's like Yoda said: The needs of the many out weigh the needs of the few" Miles quoted.

"I don't think he said that" Laurie said.

"I haven't watched any movies in a while" Miles said. "Things get a bit confusing"

The camera pans over to Rock and Spud.

"Spud are you angry about what I said?" Rock asked.

"What did you say?" Spud asked.

"I said that you didn't do anything to help in the last challenge" Rock said.

"Oh yeah... No we're cool" Spud said. "I'll try and help or whatever"

"You sure?" Rock asked. "I can never tell whether your listening or not"

"Sorry what did you say?" Spud asked.

The plane lands in Brazil and the Teams get off the plane. The first ones to the Don Box are Sanders and MacArthur.

"It's a Botch or Watch" MacArthur read from her travel tip.

Cut to Don standing next to a tree with a oven mit hanging from it.

"In this challenge whoever didn't swim with sharks in the Mediterranean must perform a traditional Brazilian rite of passage" Don explained. "They must stick their hand in this glove of bullet ants to retrieve their next travel tip"

Don nervously looks off camera.

"We have a medical team on stand by right?" Don asked.

The teams are walking towards the glove.

"So how painful are bullet ants?" Kitty asked.

"The pain and swelling from the bites of the bullet ants can last from up to twenty four hours" Emma said.

"Oh... Great.." Kitty said.

All the teams stop at the glove and awkwardly stand around.

"So who wants to go first?" Melvin asked.

"Well I would... But I really don't want ants in my dress" Jen said. "Maybe someone else should go"

"I'm too terrified" Carrie said.

There's an awkward silence.

"Anybody?" Melvin asked. "Okay, I'll go"

Melvin nervously hovers over the glove.

"Um... Give me a second" Melvin said.

"Can I go first?" Mickey asked.

"Not now kid. I'm already here" Melvin said.

Jay and Mickey talk to the camera with the jungle in the background.

"I actually have a really good feeling about this for once" Mickey said. "I've been bitten by poisonous animals so many times I've built up a resistance. Last year on an aquarium field trip a box jellyfish sat on my head like a hat"

Jay and Mickey try to high five but they both miss.

"We don't high five very often" Jay said.

Jay tries to high five Mickey but accidentally pushes him back. Mickey crashes into Melvin who has his hand pushed in to the glove.

"GAH! That was my card trick hand!" Melvin exclaimed.

"I'm so sorry!" Mickey said.

"I'll be okay" Melvin said.

Melvin takes his hand out of the glove holding the travel tip. His hand his now very swollen.

"Let me see that travel tip" Trevor said.

Trevor takes the travel tip from his partner.

"It say we have swing to the coconuts" Trevor read. "What the Hell does that mean?"

Cut to Don standing on the edge of a cliff.

"Teams must cross this ravine by any means necessary" Don explained.

Don walks over to several large piles of coconuts.

"Then they must look for the next travel tip hidden inside these coconuts" Don said. "The catch is there are only nineteen tips. The rest of the coconuts are empty"

Back at the glove Lorenzo is getting ready to get the travel tip.

"Quit stalling!" Chet said.

"Fine!" Lorenzo said.

Lorenzo reaches in to the glove.

"AH!" Lorenzo shouted.

Lorenzo takes out the travel tip.

"Come on let's go!" Chet said.

"I'm going" Lorenzo said.

Chet and Lorenzo run off.

Laurie goes over to the glove.

"Okay, I can do this" Laurie said to herself.

Laurie reaches in to the glove and quickly pulls out the travel tip.

"Come on Miles let's go" Laurie said.

 **Team Interview**

"We like to say that we love all animals" Miles said.

"But those bullet ant bites really hurt" Laurie said.

 **End Interview**

Mickey walks towards the glove. MacArthur pushes Mickey out of the way.

"Sorry kid, we need to catch up" MacArthur said.

MacArthur reaches in to the glove.

"AH! Officer down!" MacArthur exclaimed.

MacArthur runs off.

"Wait for me" Sanders said.

Mickey tries to walk towards the glove again. Taylor steps in his way and glares at him.

"Um... Ladies first" Mickey said.

"Hey, he was there first!" Kitty said to Taylor. "Let him go"

"Fine! But I'm next" Taylor said.

Taylor storms off.

"Wow, thanks" Mickey said.

Mickey walks over to the glove and pulls out two travel tips. Unlike the others his arm isn't swollen. Mickey walks over to Kitty and gives her one travel tip.

"Here you go" Mickey said. "It's the least I can do for you helping me"

"Thanks" Kitty said.

Kitty snaps a picture of her and Mickey.

 **Team Interview**

"What happened to our no alliances agreement?" Emma asked.

"I didn't form an alliance" Kitty said. "And I never agreed to an agreement"

 **End Interview**

Taylor goes over to the glove. Instead of reaching into the glove Taylor blows in to the glove and a travel tip foats out. She grabs it.

"Got it" Taylor said.

 **Team Interview**

"My lung capacity is so huge that doctors can't measure it with their fancy lung rulers or whatever" Taylor said.

"When she was five she held her breathe for seven minuets until we bought her the _very expensive_ dollhouse she wanted" Kelly said.

 **End Interview**

Melvin and Trevor are swinging on a vine across the ravine.

"Slow down!" Melvin shouted.

"It's a vine! It doesn't do that!" Trevor shouted.

Laurie and Miles crash into them and they all fall to the bottom of the ravine.

"Ow! My face!" Miles exclaimed.

"You landed on my neck..." Trevor said.

"How do we get up?" Laurie asked.

"I don't know" Miles said.

"You're all idiots" Melvin said.

At the top of the cliff Sanders and MacArthur land.

"We made it! That's how we roll" MacArthur said.

Lorenzo lands on the edge of the cliff and kicks MacArthur out of the way.

"That was pretty funny" Sanders said.

Chet then kicks her out of the way.

Jay and Mickey start swinging across the ravine. Halfway across the vine breaks and they fall down the ravine. They fall to the bottom and land on top of the Magicians and Vegans.

"Oh hey more people" Miles said.

Back and the glove Rock and Spud go up to it.

"Come on Spud you've got to do this" Rock said. "Remember what I said about being helpful"

Spud reaches in to the glove and pulls out the travel tip. His hand is swollen but he doesn't have a reaction to it.

 **Team Interview**

"Spud's got a delayed reaction to everything" Rock said. "He won't feel those bites for hours. But when he does he'll be all like: YOWCHE!"

"What?" Spud asked.

 **End Interview**

Lewis and Tracey are the last ones to go up to the glove.

"Tracey, I know you can do it" Lewis said.

"If that swelling and redness doesn't go away it'll be your fault and I'll never get another movie roll" Tracey said.

"Okay, calm down" Lewis said.

Tracey reaches into the glove and grabs the travel tip.

 **Team Interview**

"This show hasn't been good to us" Lewis said. "But I actually think we're starting to get known more"

"Jus this morning I got a call about being in Alvin and the Chipmunks five... Not a great start but it'll get better" Tracey said.

 **End Interview**

The first flight finally lands and the teams get off of it. Josee and Jacques get to the Don Box first and take the travel tip.

"It's a Botch or Watch" Josee read. "You're up Jacques"

Jacques runs over to the glove.

"Hurry up!" Josee said.

"Right" Jacques said.

Jacques reaches in to the glove and takes the travel tip out.

The Cousins and Geniuses are the next ones to the glove.

"Okay, I think I know a way to get the travel tip with out getting hurt" Jack said.

"Really?" Mary said. "No offence but you don't seem like the smartest"

"Well, watch this" Jack said.

"I have a bad feeling about this" Bonnie said.

"It won't end badly I swear" Jack said.

Jack walks over to the glove. He picks up the glove and shakes it. A bunch of ants fly out of the glove. Two travel tips fly out of the glove. Jack grabs both of them and puts the glove down.

"Okay, here you go" Jack said.

Jack hands Ellody the travel tip.

"Um... Jack, look at Bonnie" Ellody said.

Jack looks to his left. He sees that all the ants that fell out are now crawling all over Bonnie. There are a bunch of small red bites all over her.

"Jack... You are... An idiot..." Bonnie said trying to suppress pain.

 **Team Interview**

"Look on the bright side" Jack said. "Instead of a bunch of bites in one place. There are a bunch of them... All over... That's kind of worse"

"If I wasn't in so much pain I would punch you" Bonnie said.

 **End Interview**

Back with the coconut pile Sanders and MacArthur are trying to break open the coconuts.

"Why won't you open!" MacArthur yelled.

"You know they gave us hammers" Sanders said.

"I've got it" MacArthur said. "I don't need help"

Sanders leans closer but MacArthur pushes her away.

"Just give me that!" Sanders said.

Sanders takes the coconut and hits it with the hammer. The coconut breaks open to reveal the travel tip.

"I wore it down for you" MacArthur said.

Sanders takes the travel tip

"Huh, it's an All-In" Sanders read.

Cut to Don wearing a headdress and tail piece made of blue feathers.

"In this All-In teams must make this costume" Don explained. "Once it's approved by this local they can get the next travel tip"

Don gestures to a tall woman wearing with the same headdress as Don.

Back at the glove the flight one teams are in line. Geoff is holding the travel tip. Unlike the rest both his hands are swollen.

"I can't feel either of my hands" Geoff said.

"Let's go bro" Brody said. "The feeling should come back after a while"

At the cliff Kellly and Taylor are getting ready to get on the vine.

"Hop on and hold on" Kelly said.

Taylor hesitates.

"DO IT!" Kelly yelled.

"Please don't scream. It's bad for your neck" Taylor said.

Taylor grabs on to Kelly and they swing across to the other side.

Jay and Mickey climb up from the ravine.

"We made it out" Jay said.

Josee and Jacques swing towards Jay and Mickey and kick them into a pile of coconuts.

Jay and Mickey get up. Jay notices that Mickey's head broke open a coconut with a travel tip inside.

"Whoa you found a travel tip" Jay said.

Jay and Mickey talk to the camera with the other teams working in the background.

"You know I think our luck is changing" Jay said. "It sort of offsets the whole vine breaking thing"

"Hooray..." Mickey said weakly.

Kelly cracks open one of the coconuts and one of the travel tips falls out.

"Yes!" Kelly cheered.

"OMG! Mom arms down! You have armpit stains" Taylor said.

Kelly quickly puts her arms down.

Back at the ravine the Vegans and Magicians climb out of the ravine.

"Well that went badly" Melvin said.

"Come on we can still make it" Trevor said.

Melvin and Trevor run over to the coconuts.

"Are you okay Miles?" Laurie asked.

"I'll be fine" Miles said. "Come on let's try and catch up"

On the other side of the ravine Rock and Spud are thinking of a way to cross it.

"Spud, how's your hand?" Rock asked.

"What it's fine" Spud said.

Spud looks at his left hand. He then looks at the other hand to see that it's swollen.

"Whoa! How did that happen... Could have sworn they were the same size this morning" Spud said.

Spud leans on a tree and the tree falls and bridges the gap.

"Way to go Spud!" Rock said.

Rock and Spud walk across on the tree. Carrie and Devin see the fallen tree.

"Should we cross on that thing?" Carrie asked.

"It looks safe" Devin said.

They start walking on it. The tree makes a cracking noise.

"We should move a bit faster" Carrie said.

Devin nods.

They make it off the tree. Ryan and Stephanie try to cross the tree bridge but it breaks and they fall down the ravine. Owen and Noah swing across the ravine. Noah gets off first and Owen lands on him.

"My spine!" Noah exclaimed. "I need that!"

Josee and Jacques are going through the coconuts.

"Why don't any of these have travel tips inside of them!?" Josee said angrily.

Josee angrily throws a coconut at Geoff. The coconut opens to reveal a travel tip.

"Alright dude, I found a travel tip" Geoff said.

"Let's go" Brody said.

At the dress making a lot of the teams have already made it there. MacArthur goes up to the judge. Instead of the regular headdress MacArthur made hers in to a police hat.

"What do you think?" MacAthur asked.

The judge gives her a thumbs down.

"No!? What do you mean no?!" MacArthur said. "Listen lady, I spent a lot of time on this!"

"Let's go" Sanders said.

Sanders holds MacArthur back and drags her away.

Back at the crafts table Tom and Jen seem very excited.

"Oh my God! I can't believe we're making this headdress" Tom said. "I've always wanted to actually design something"

"I know right me to" Jen said. "I can't wait to wear this"

"Who said you get to wear this?" Tom asked.

"This is made for a girl" Jen said.

"Big deal" Tom said. "You bought your winter boots in the mens department"

"They fit me better" Jen said.

The camera pans over to Emma and Kitty.

"Do you still think we shouldn't be in an alliance with Jay and Mickey?" Kitty asked.

"No way" Emma said. "They'll trick us in to thinking they're our friends. And when you least expect it they'll turn on us"

"Really?" Kitty asked.

The camera pans over to Jay and Mickey. Mickey had somehow glued his hands to his face and Jay was trying to get them off.

"Okay you have a point" Emma said.

Emma and Kitty walk over to them.

"Here's the deal" Emma said. "We're going to set up a trial mini-alliance"

"Really, cool" Mickey said.

"The deal is you help us and we help you" Emma said.

"Of course" Jay said. "We'll do whatever we can"

The camera pans over to Lewis and Tracey.

"Ha! This challenge is a piece of cake!" Tracey said. "I always talk to the guy who does my costumes"

"Speak for yourself" Lewis said. "There are like ten dollars worth of feathers glued to my back right now... I don't know how I got it there"

"Well with me here there's hope" Tracey said.

Lewis and Tracey high five. They try to pull apart but can't.

"Lewis... Explain this" Tracey said.

"I got glue all over both my hands... Somehow" Lewis said.

Over by the ravine Ryan and Stephanie climb up the cliff.

"I told you the tree would break" Stephanie said. "But did you listen"

"No..." Ryan said. "Can we just forget about this and look for the next travel tip"

Over at the coconuts the Vegans, Father & Son, Magicians, Best Friends, Goths, Ice Dancers, Stepbrothers, and Reality TV Pros are already there. The camera pans over to Owen and Noah. Owen eats an entire coconut.

"Okay, I got it down" Owen said.

"You realize we aren't supposed to eat them?" Noah asked.

"Um... No" Owen said.

"We're supposed to break them open" Noah said.

"Oops... Sorry about that" Owen said.

"Most of the teams are still looking through the coconuts Geoff and Brody have gotten themselves in to first place" Don narrated.

The scene shifts to Geoff and Brody receive their travel tip.

"It says we have to take a hang glider" Brody said.

Cut to Don standing at the Chill Zone.

"This lovely beach is the location of today's Chill Zone" Done explained. "Teams must take a tandem hang glider from the cliffs above down here"

At the top of the cliff Geoff and Brody get on their hang glider. They jump off the cliff but their hands slip and they fall in to the water.

Back with the coconuts Carrie and Devin find their travel tip.

"Finally" Carrie said. "Come on let's go"

Ryan stomps on a coconut and cracks it open. He takes a travel tip from the inside.

"Took you long enough" Stephanie said.

"Don't worry we're catching up" Ryan said.

Ennui smashes a coconut against the side of his head and a travel tip falls out.

"Ow... My head" Ennui said flatly.

"You're such a drama queen sometimes" Crimson said.

Lorenzo hits Chet over the head with a coconut. A travel tip falls out.

"Hey! You're actually good for something!" Lorenzo said.

"No I'm not!" Chet said. "I mean... Shut up!"

Melvin and Trevor are going through a pile of coconuts.

"Why are none of these good?" Trevor asked.

Melvin throws a coconut towards Laurie and Miles in anger.

The coconut smashes against a tree and a travel tip falls out. Laurie grabs it.

"Look! I found one!" Laurie said.

"Wow, that's great" Miles said.

"Hey we found that!" Melvin said.

"Finders keepers" Miles said.

"Give it to us" Melvin said.

Melvin tackles Laurie. Laurie lets go of the tip and it starts to float away in the wind. Melvin gets up and starts chasing the travel tip. Miles grabs the travel tip before him.

"Give me the travel tip!" Melvin said.

Miles loses their grip and Melvin takes it.

"Yes!" Melvin exclaimed.

Melvin looks around quickly before dropping it into the ravine.

 **Team Interview**

"Why did you do that?" Trevor asked.

"To stall them. We can find another one" Melvin said.

"Kind of a jerk move" Trevor said.

"This is reality TV. You need to be competitive to win. We've been coming in too close to last" Melvin said. "Don't you watch Survivor?"

"What the Hell is Survivor?" Trevor asked.

 **End Interview**

"So should one of us get that" Laurie asked.

"The travel tip said there were only nineteen of them in there... I'll go get it" Miles said.

Elsewhere Josee and Jacques are starting to lose their grip.

"Why don't any of these coconuts have tips in them!" Josee said angrily.

Josee throws a coconut that hits Owen in the head. The coconuts breaks open and reveal a travel tip.

"Cool" Owen said.

"Let's go" Noah said

Junior breaks open a coconut and a travel falls out.

"Got it!" Junior said.

Dwayne grabs the ticket and he and Junior start running.

"Stop them! I need that travel tip!" Josee said.

Josee tackles Dwayne.

"Run son!" Dwayne exclaimed.

Junior takes the travel tip from her partner and starts running. Jacques chases after her. Josee tries to throw a coconut at Junior but it ends up hitting Jacques in the head. The coconut breaks open to reveal a travel tip.

"YES! Finally!" Josee cheered.

 **Team Interview**

"Josee... Tell me what happened?" Jacques asked. "I think my brain is broken"

"I told you" Josee said. "A monkey jumped out of a tree, picked up a coconut, and hit you in the head"

 **End Interview**

Josee and Jacques run over to the craft table where the other teams are working. The judge waits for the teams. Chet and Lorenzo walk up to her. Lorenzo is glued to Chet's arm.

"Don't ask. Just give us the travel tip" Lorenzo said.

The judge hands them the travel tip. After them Josee and Jacques run up to the judge. Instead of the outfit that everyone else had their outfit had red feathers and instead of just being a headpiece and tail piece they had feathers on their legs and arms to. The judge hands them their travel tip.

"Um... Didn't you too just get here?" The judge asked.

"Yes" Josee answered.

 **Team Interview**

"We've designed our own costumes for all of our shows" Josee explained.

"This was a piece of cake" Jacques said.

 **End Interview**

Crimson and Ennui walk up to the judge. Instead of the regular blue feathers Crimson's dress has black feathers.

"What are you staring at?" Crimson asked the judge.

The judge hands her the travel tip.

 **Team Interview**

"Bright colours are for people who live sad pointless lives" Crimson said.

"Yeah..." Ennui said.

 **End Interview**

Kelly and Taylor go over to the judge.

"What do you think?" Kelly asked.

The judge gives them the travel tip.

"Yes!" Kelly cheered. Kelly raises her arms in the air in celebration.

"Mom! Your armpits" Taylor reminded her.

Kelly quickly puts her arms down. After they leave Lewis and Tracey run over there.

"What do you think? It's a amazing right" Tracey said proudly.

The judge gives her the travel tip.

At the crafts table the teams are working on their costumes.

"Okay, I think this costume is good" Kitty said.

"Are you sure?" Emma asked.

"Yes Emma, I'm sure" Kitty said.

Kitty puts on the headdress. Emma and Kitty go over to the judge.

"Well, did we do good?" Emma asked.

The judge nods and hands them the tip.

"Yes!" Emma cheered.

After them Dwayne and Junior go up to the judge who hands them their ticket.

Over on the cliff Chet is on the hang glider. Lorenzo is still glued to his back.

"You know the fact is that I'm still doing good even though I'm glued to you" Lorenzo said.

"More like _because_ you're glued to me" Chet said.

"No it's not" Lorenzo said. "Now stop being a- CLIFF!"

"What?" Chet asked.

Chet steps off the edge of the cliff and falls.

"Nice going jerk!" Lorenzo shouted as they fell.

Meanwhile at the Chill Zone Josee and Jacques arrive first.

"Congratulations you are in first" Don said.

"Yes! First place!" Josee cheered.

Crimson and Ennui land next to Don on their hang glider.

"Crimson and Ennui you get second place... I'm assuming you don't care" Don said.

"Pretty much" Crimson said.

Cut to a black screen.

"Third!" Don said as a picture of Kelly and Taylor appeared.

"Fourth!" A picture of Geoff and Brody appeared next

"Fifth!" A picture of Chet and Lorenzo appeared.

"Sixth!" Lewis and Tracey appear next.

"Seventh!" After that a picture of Dwayne and Junior appeared.

Back up on the cliff the Adversity Twins and Sisters are getting ready to take off.

"You've got our back right?" Kitty asked.

"You bet" Mickey said.

They both take off and start gliding.

"Jay! I think I'm getting a nose bleed!" Mickey said.

"Hang on until we land!" Jay said.

Mickey's lack of focus causes him and Jay to crash into Emma and Kitty. They all land on the Carpet of Completion.

"And trial over... Alliance terminated" Emma said.

"Sorry guys... Gotta agree with my sister on this one" Kitty said.

"Fair enough..." Mickey said weakly.

"Sisters, you get eighth, Adversity Twins, ninth" Don said. "Please get off the carpet and see a doctor"

Meanwhile back at the ravine Miles climbs out holding the travel tip.

"I got it" Miles said. "Those magicians are going to get it"

"Come on we need to hurry up" Laurie said.

Laurie helps Miles up and they hurry over to the crafts table.

Back at the Chill Zone Tom and Jen land their hang glider.

"Tenth!" Don announced.

"Alright!" Tom cheered.

"Look out!" A voice from above shouted.

Noah and Owen suddenly crash just outside of the Chill Zone. Mary and Ellody land their hang glider on the carpet followed by Bonnie and Jack.

"Eleventh and Twelfth" Don announced.

Sanders and MacArthur make it over to the Chill Zone next.

"Thirteenth!" Don said.

Noah drags Owen over to the carpet.

"Fourteenth!" Don announced.

The Daters and Best Friends run to the Chill Zone next.

"Fifteenth and Sixteenth!" Don announced.

Melvin and Trevor land their hang glider on the Carpet of Completion.

"Seventeenth!" Don announced.

The Rockers and Vegans land next and start running. Rock and Spud make it to the Chill Zone first.

"Rock and Spud, you are in eighteenth" Don said.

Don walks up to Laurie and Miles.

"Laurie, Miles, you are in nineteenth, which means you're eliminated" Don said.

"But those magicians threw are travel tip down the ravine earlier. We wouldn't be in last if that didn't happen" Laurie said. "Isn't that sort of stuff against the rules?"

"I'm not sure. I may look into that..." Don said. "But in the meantime hitch hike home or whatever you hippie's do because you're out of here!"

Melvin walks over to them.

"Hey no hard feelings right?" Melvin asked.

Melvin holds out his hand hoping for someone to shake it.

"Sure..." Miles said awkwardly.

Miles pushes his hand away.

Clips of Laurie and Miles play while they narrate over them.

"All out plans for the money are gone..." Miles said over a clip of them walking with their camel in Morocco.

"I still can't believe we had to eat meat!" Laurie said over a clip of them peddling their moped.

"Your hart is in the right place... Not the one you ate the one inside you... Well they're both inside you" Miles said over a clip of her hugging a shark in the Mediterranean.

"What are you saying?" Laurie asked as the footage switched to them walking into the sunset.

"I don't know... This metaphor is getting confused" Miles said.

* * *

 **And there's another elimination that's the same as canon. I tried to make it slightly less cruel by cutting out the bit where Laurie's face is bitten by bullet ants. I also made them come in dead last instead of have them come in first only to get a penalty. Let me know that you thought. Also Melvin may or may not be a secondary antagonist now. Let me know what you think of that decisio**


	7. A Tisket, A Tasket, Where is the Casket

"Last time on the Ridonculous Race. The ants came marching one by one in Brazil. Where our teams went coconuts. An alliance between the Sisters and Twins formed... Before being immediately destroyed. The pressure of the race started to get to some of the competitors. Namely Stephanie and Melvin. Josee and Jacques came in first. But on the other side of the coin out vegetable loving friends Laurie and Miles were cut from the race. Now that the only non-selfish team is gone what will happen? Stay tuned to find out on: The Ridonculous Race!"

Don is standing in the Brazilian Chill Zone.

"Here at the beach is today's starting point for the race" Don explained. "Leaving first is Josee and Jacques"

Josee and Jacques go over to Don and wave at the camera.

"Hello fans!" Josee said.

"We're back!" Jacques said.

Jacques presses the button on the Don Box and takes the travel tip.

"It says we have to go to Dracula's castle in Transylvania" Jacques read.

Cut to a background of the Romanian flag with a photo of an old looking castle to accompany it.

"Transylvania, home of majestic mountains, old Saxon architecture, and that feeling you get when you're alone in the dark" Don narrated. "Teams must travel to this old castle to receive their next travel tip"

Cut back to Don, Josee, and Jacques.

"There's a shuttle bus waiting for you that will take you to the airport" Don said.

"First place here we come!" Josee cheered.

Later inside the shuttle bus it's revealed that all the teams are inside the bus and Josee and Jacques are very unhappy about it. The camera pans to Crimson and Ennui.

"What is this strange feeling?" Crimson asked.

"I fear it may be... Excitement!" Ennui said.

 **Team Interview**

"Transylvania... I can't believe it..." Ennui said.

"Just awesome..." Crimson said.

 **End Interview**

The bus has started moving. The camera focuses on Tom and Jen.

"Can I show them? I am so excited" Tom said.

"Yes! Of course" Jen said.

 **Team Interview**

Tom takes out a fez and puts it on his head.

"I bought it from a local here. Who as it turns out is also a distributor" Tom explained. "So I ordered 4000 of them to be shipped home. I will make fez's a thing again!"

 **End Interview**

"Jen, put yours on" Tom said.

"Um... Maybe later" Jen said.

The bus stops at the airport and the teams rush inside. They form a line to get airline tickets. Ryan and Stephanie are at the very back.

"Ryan! There are only two flights and I do not want to be on the second one" Stephanie said. "Throw me to the front"

"I don't know. That doesn't sound like a good idea" Ryan said.

"Do it!" Stephanie demanded.

"Okay" Ryan said.

Ryan picks up Stephanie and throws her towards the front of the line. Sanders and MacArthur notice her flying towards them.

"Take cover!" MacArthur exclaimed.

Stephanie lands on the clerk handing out tickets.

 **Team Interview**

"Ryan has voiced some concerns about how "Competitive" I've been getting" Stephanie said. "But we've reached an understanding. Right Ryan"

"I need to be more supportive so that she doesn't have to be the constant and lone motivator..." Ryan said nervously.

 **End Interview**

Most of the teams are show running to catch their plane.

"The first ten teams have made it on to the plane" Don narrated. "But the remaining eight teams on flight two leave forty five minuets later, a hurdle that may be too difficult to overcome"

The Rockers, Fashion Bloggers, Magicians, Mom & Daughter, Best Friends, Adversity Twins, and Stepbrothers are seen waiting for their plane in the airport.

"Come on Rock, I know you wanted to be on the first flight" Spud said. "What can I do to cheer you up?"

"You can help us win" Rock said.

"I can totally do that" Spud said.

"Cool... Wait are you just telling me what I wanted to hear?" Rock asked.

"Yeah. And boy did you look happy" Spud said.

The camera pans over to Melvin and Trevor.

"You know Melvin I kind feel guilty about causing Laurie and Miles to come in last" Trevor said. "You were just so aggressive"

"Don't feel guilty you had nothing to do with it. All I did was delay them" Melvin said. "And besides, I'm not really that aggressive. It's all an act for this. Just like when we perform. We need to stop coming in so close to last"

"That still doesn't make me feel better..." Trevor said.

"Do you want to come in last?" Melvin asked.

"No..." Trevor said.

"Then follow my lead" Melvin said.

Meanwhile in Romania the first plane lands and the teams get off. It's raining outside the airport.

"Okay... It's about as creepy as I imagined..." Junior said.

Cut to Crimson and Ennui talking to the camera with the castle in the background.

"Dracula was the first Goth" Crimson said. "To be here is just... It's so... I can't-"

"Careful Crimson... You almost had colour in your face" Ennui said.

Cut to the teams running up the hill to the castle with Crimson and Ennui in the lead. Close behind them are Josee and Jacques. Sanders and MacArthur catch up to them.

"Oh, sorry are you trying to pass us?" Josee asked.

Josee pushes Sanders down the hill.

"Oh no you don't!" MacArthur said.

MacArthur tackles Josee and Jacques.

Meanwhile on the second plane Carrie is talking to Tom and Jen.

"So you two have a blog. That's so cool" Carrie said. "Who started it?"

"I did" Tom and Jen said at the same time.

"No I did" Jen said.

"What? It was totally me" Tom said.

 **Team Interview**

"Okay you typed it out but it was my idea" Jen said. "I'm the creator and you were like... My personal assistant"

"What? Excuse me!?" Tom said.

 **End Interview**

Meanwhile at the gate to the castle Ryan and Stephanie make it there first.

"Yeah! We made it!" Stephanie cheered.

"See what we have to do next" Ryan said.

Stephanie takes the travel tip.

"It's an All-In!" Stephanie said.

Cut to Don standing next to a bunch of coffins.

"In this All-In whoever was holding the travel tip must drag one of these coffins with their partner inside to a graveyard where they must tip the coffin into an open grave" Don explained. "Creepy isn't it?"

Meanwhile at the airport the teams on flight two rush out. Jay and Mickey move more slowly than the others.

 **Team Interview**

"We know vampires aren't real" Jay said. "We aren't stupid... But werewolves on the other hand..."

"If they can smell fear we're both in big trouble..." Mickey said.

 **End Interview**

"Last one up there eats snot!" Lorenzo said.

"Yeah but it'll be you!" Chet said.

"I guess we should find the castle" Jen said.

"That's what the tip said" Tom said. "Unless you'd like to take credit for that to you"

"It was my idea!" Jen insisted.

"It so was not" Tom said.

Meanwhile inside the castle Geoff and Brody are following Emma and Kitty around.

"... And then he said dude, that moose doesn't need mouth to mouth" Brody said.

"Cool story" Kitty said.

"Why are you following us?" Emma asked. "How about this, me and Kitty stay here and you two... Just go away!"

"Rad idea!" Brody said. "If we find the coffins we'll signal you"

"How do we know what the signal is" Emma asked.

"It goes something like this" Geoff said. "Woo! Reow! Weeow! Roo!"

"Please stop" Emma said.

Kitty takes a picture of Geoff and Brody.

Meanwhile at the castle Lorenzo and Chet make it there.

"I made it first! Now you have to eat snot!" Lorenzo said.

"Shut up" Chet said

Chet takes the travel tip.

"Whoever took the travel tip must... What!" Chet read.

Meanwhile at the coffins Dwayne is getting into one of the coffins.

"Now, don't get out or do anything that could get us a penalty" Junior said.

 **Team Interview**

"I'm loving the father son time. Junior's the best. He's almost too obedient" Dwayne said. "He needs to learn that part of growing up is learning what rules you can ignore"

"Does this mean I can ignore my curfew?" Junior asked.

"Well not that" Dwayne said.

"Drive your car?" Junior asked.

"You'd better not drive my car!" Dwayne said.

"Get a tattoo!" Junior said

"Of course not!" Dwayne said.

"Quit school" Junior said.

"You're grounded!" Dwayne exclaimed.

 **End Interview**

Elsewhere in the castle Kelly and Taylor are searching for coffins.

"You know Taylor the architecture here is really quite astounding" Kelly said.

"It's totally gross here" Taylor said. "I swear I saw bats on the ceiling"

"Just try and enjoy it" Kelly said.

 **Team Interview**

"Mom, please remind me why we're here" Taylor said.

"I thought it would be good for us to get to spend some time together" Kelly said.

"Well you were wrong" Taylor said.

 **End Interview**

Meanwhile with the Cousins and Geniuses.

"I have no clue where we're going" Jack said.

"For once I'm on the same page as you Jack" Bonnie said.

"We know what we're doing" Mary said.

"We passed history class with flying colours" Ellody said. "Not to brag but I know this castle like the back of my hand"

"Show off..." Bonnie muttered.

Meanwhile Emma and Kitty are looking for the coffins.

"Come on where is it" Emma said. "It has to be here somewhere"

"Maybe there's a secret passageway or something" Kitty said.

"You actually might be on to something" Emma said.

"Let's check the bookcase. Like in the movies" Kitty said.

"Kitty, that's ridiculous" Emma said. "This isn't a movie. It's getting dark, let me take this torch"

Emma takes a torch off the wall and that opens a trap door beneath them.

Meanwhile in the graveyard Stephanie is dragging Ryan inside a coffin.

"You're doing great" Ryan said.

"Thanks babe" Stephanie said.

 **Team Interview**

"It was very impressive of Stephanie to carry me" Ryan said. "I don't know if you noticed but I'm like 75% upper body"

 **End Interview**

Josee is moving Jacques inside the coffin by flipping it.

"Josee! Take it easy!" Jacques exclaimed.

"I can't hear you" Josee said.

 **Team Interview**

"I know it's a race. But the way Josee was moving that coffin... She nearly gave me a concussion" Jacques said.

"You mean if someone were to drop you face first on to the ice in a stadium full of people on the most important day of your life!" Josee said. "That kind of concussion?"

"Yes..." Jacques said nervously.

 **End Interview**

Meanwhile Crimson and Ennui find the coffins.

"Vintage hexagon oak wood with Corinthian leather interior" Ennui said. "Nice"

Crimson gets into the coffin.

"Take me to the grace digger" Crimson said.

 **Team Interview**

"Modern coffins are so flimsy" Ennui said.

"When I die I want a coffin made in the plague" Crimson said. "They really knew how to make a coffin"

"Probably because of all the deaths..." Ennui said.

 **End Interview**

Meanwhile Mickey is struggling to carry Jay inside the coffin.

"My legs are cramping... My arms are hurting... I can't go much further" Mickey said.

Mickey falls over and the coffin lands on top of him.

"If you couldn't do it, I'm sure I couldn't either" Jay said from inside the coffin.

Lewis walks over to Jay and Mickey while carrying the coffin above his head.

"Hey, do you kids need help?" Lewis asked.

"That'd be nice..." Mickey said weakly.

"Well I want to help but I have to carry Tracey and she is very heavy" Lewis said.

"I can hear you!" Tracey yelled from inside the coffin.

"Gotta go!" Lewis said quickly before walking away.

"Thanks anyway..." Mickey said.

A loud howling noise suddenly comes out of nowhere.

"Did you hear that?" Jay asked.

"WEREWOLF!" Mickey exclaimed.

Mickey gets a sudden burst of adrenaline and lifts up the coffin. Mickey then loses his grip and the coffin crushes him again.

Meanwhile by the coffins Geoff and Brody are trying to signal Emma and Kitty which is where the howling was coming from.

"I don't see them" Brody said.

"Oh well, I'll just get in the coffin" Geoff said.

A panel opens up from the ceiling and Emma and Kitty fall out of it.

"Oh hey there you are" Brody said. "We saved you a coffin"

"Thanks..." Emma said weakly.

Meanwhile Josee makes it to the graveyard.

"Finally!" Josee said.

Josee pushes Jacques's coffin into a nearby open grave. Josee notices Chet was already there with Lorenzo's coffin.

"Weren't you two on the second flight?" Josee asked.

"Who said that?" Lorenzo asked from inside the coffin.

"Nobody, you dweeb" Chet said.

Chet pushes Lorenzo into the grave.

"Ha!" Chet laughed.

Lorenzo reaches out of the grave and pulls Chet in.

"Cut it out!" Chet exclaimed. "Let's just find the grave digger"

The camera pans over to a pale hunchbacked man wearing ragged clothes carrying a machete.

"I think that's him..." Chet said nervously.

"Well he sure isn't the ice cream man" Lorenzo said.

The camera pans out to reveal Noah pushing Owen.

"Ooh! There's ice cream!" Owen said.

"No Owen, there isn't" Noah said.

Noah pushes Owen into the grave,

"Ow!" Owen exclaimed.

Chet and Lorenzo crawl out of the open grave.

"Come on let's get that travel tip" Lorenzo said.

They look behind them to see the grave digger standing there. They fall over in shock and end up falling into the grave again. The grave digger hands them there travel tip.

"Oh... Um... Thanks" Lorenzo said. "The tip says we need to ride on horse back to the Romanian Gymnastic Training Centre and find the Don Box... Horseback?"

They turn around and see a bunch of angry looking horses.

"Huh... I was wondering why those were there before" Chet said.

Cut to Chet and Lorenzo talking to the camera in front of the grave they were in.

"Sweet, we're in first place" Lorenzo said. "The last time I felt this good was when I got that medal for being awesome"

"That was a prize in a cereal box and you stole it from me!" Chet said angrily.

"Shut up" Lorenzo said.

Cut to Junior tipping his dad's coffin into one of the open graves.

"Gah! My face!" Dwayne exclaimed.

"You okay down there dad?" Junior asked.

"I'll be fine sport..." Dwayne said weakly. "Just a few bruises... Nothing to bad"

The camera pans over to Kelly holding a coffin over her head.

"Are you okay in there Taylor?" Kelly asked.

"You'd better put me down slowly" Taylor said from inside the coffin.

"I'll try" Kelly said.

Kelly tries to lower Taylor into the grave slowly but her hand slips and she drops Taylor into the grave.

"Ah! I got a splinter!" Taylor exclaimed.

The camera pans to Bonnie dumping Jack's coffin into a nearby grave.

"Ouch!" Jack exclaimed. "I'll be okay... The broken pieces of wood broke my fall"

Jack climbs out of the grave.

"Come on Jack let's go" Bonnie said. "Time's ticking away"

"Wait shouldn't we wait for Mary and Ellody? They aren't here yet" Jack said.

"Forget about those nerds. They can catch up on their own" Bonnie said.

"Come on, we can wait just a little" Jack said.

"... Okay fine" Bonnie said.

Cut to Bonnie talking to the Camera with Jack standing by a grave in the background.

"I like Jack. He's one of the few people I have some respect for" Bonnie said. "But he needs to start using his brain to think instead of his heart. The only reason I chose him is because my parents have "Jobs" and "Responsibilities". Pesky things like that"

Meanwhile Tom and Jen find the coffins.

"I sure hope there's enough room in that coffin for your giant ego" Tom said.

"Hey, it'll be nice for you to carry me for once" Jen said.

Jen gets inside the coffin.

"The only change here is that you're in a coffin" Tom said.

Tom pushes the coffin over.

"Ow! Watch the face!" Jen exclaimed.

Meanwhile Ennui is dragging Crimson's coffin towards the grave yard.

"Wait!" Crimson said from inside the coffin.

Crimson opens the door of the coffin and gets out.

"I know it's against the rules but this is your only chance to be in a coffin..." Crimson said. "Well... The only one you'll remember.. Get in!"

"You read my mind" Ennui said.

Ennui gets in the coffin.

Meanwhile back in the graveyard.

"Where is that grave digger" Ryan said.

There's a flash of lightning and he suddenly appears in front of Ryan.

"Oh God!" Ryan exclaimed.

The grave digger hands Ryan his tip.

"Oh... Thanks" Ryan said.

 **Team Interview**

"It took us a while to find the graveyard but we're back on track now" Ryan said.

"Just say it!" Stephanie yelled. "It took _me_ a while to find the graveyard! Me!"

"Hey, we're still ahead of most of the teams" Ryan said.

"You're right" Stephanie said. "I'm sorry"

Stephanie hugs Ryan.

"We make a great team" Ryan said.

 **End Interview**

Mickey tips Jay's coffin into the grave.

"Are you okay Jay?" Mickey asked.

"Nothing I'm not used to by now" Jay said.

Melvin comes up behind Mickey and pushes him into the grave.

"Gah!" Mickey exclaimed.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to push you too hard" Melvin said. "Just wanted to slow you down and all"

"It's fine. Jay broke my fall" Mickey said.

"Okay good" Melvin said.

 **Team Interview**

"Despite our bad luck I think we're getting better" Jay said.

"I was almost sure we'd be the first ones going home" Mickey said.

"If we push ourselves we can do anything" Jay said.

 **End Interview**

Meanwhile Chet and Lorenzo are riding through the forest on their horse.

"I think I can see the training centre up ahead!" Lorenzo said.

Josee and Jacques suddenly pass them.

"So long!" Josee said.

The camera pans over to Josee and Jacques' horse who is smiling like them.

"That's just weird..." Chet said.

Josee and Jacques make it to the training centre first and go over to the Don Box. Jacques takes the travel tip.

"It's a Botch or Watch" Jacques read. "Yes! We have to do gymnastics!"

Cut to Don inside the training centre.

"Gymnastics: Nastics that take place in a gym" Don said. "The teams must perform two athletic feats. First cross a balance beam while doing a jump in the middle. And then a flip over the vaulting horse"

Don walks over to a short man with a moustache wearing a white track suit.

"If you get a thumbs up from this local judge you get your next travel tip" Don explained.

Cut to Don standing in the Chill Zone in the middle of the woods.

"After that it's a foot race to the Chill Zone" Don said. "The last team here will be heading home"

Back at the Gym Josee is getting ready.

"I can do this" Josee said.

Josee takes her lucky rabbits foot out of her pocket and kisses it. She gets up on the balance beam and crosses it with no problems. After that she flips over the vaulting horse and sticks the landing.

"What do you think?" Josee asked the judge.

The judge hands her the travel tips.

 **Team Interview**

"Of course I'm good at gymnastics it's a lot like ice dancing" Josee said. "Except in ice dancing they tie razor sharp knives to your feet and there's no soft padding for you to land on if someone drops you... Right Jacques?!"

"You're scaring me Josee..." Jacques said nervously.

 **End Interview**

Back at the graveyard Tom pushes Jen's coffin into the grave.

"Ah! I broke three nails!" Jen yelled.

"Good" Tom said.

Tom turns around to see the grave digger.

"Don't kill me!" Tom exclaimed.

 **Team Interview**

"Tom kept taking breaks every ten feet" Jen said. "He needs to work out more"

"Or maybe you need to lay off the pastries" Tom taunted.

"Fez hats are stupid and went out of style ages ago!" Jen yelled.

"You mean like when you tried to make plaid leg warmers a thing?" Tom asked.

 **End Interview**

Sanders pushes MacArthurs coffin into the grave. MacArthur climbs out of the grave.

"Are we doing well?" MacArthur asked.

"We're in the bottom four" Sanders said.

"We're better than this..." MacArthur said sadly.

The camera pans to Rock and Spud receiving their travel tip from the grave digger.

"Sweet!" Spud exclaimed.

"Why are you happy dude? We're in the bottom four" Rock asked.

"Usually we're in the bottom three" Spud said.

Meanwhile at the Chill Zone Josee and Jacques arrive first.

"Congrats Ice Dancers" Don said. "You are in-"

"First!" Josee interrupted.

Both of them smile and wave to the camera.

"You know your extreme peppiness is getting creepy" Don said.

Back at the training centre more teams are competing. Chet crosses the balance beam surprisingly gracefully.

"Nobody likes a show off Chet!" Lorenzo said.

The camera pans over to Owen attempting to make a jump. He jumps on the spring board but his weight is too much for it.

"I think this thing is broken" Owen said.

Emma gets a running start and jumps over Owen and sticks the landing.

"Wow... She's really good" Noah said.

Noah walks over to Emma.

"That was pretty impressive" Noah said. "I'm Noah by the way"

"Um... Nice to meet you... I guess" Emma said.

Owen suddenly lands on top of Noah.

"I got the landing!" Owen cheered.

Once they leave Lewis jumps over the vaulting horse and sticks the landing.

"Ha! I've still got it!" Lewis cheered.

"No need to brag" Tracey said.

 **Team Interview**

"Not to brag or anything but I'm in great shape" Lewis bragged. "I mean, have you seen Action Man 8?"

"Don't see it. Critics said it was the biggest bomb of 2006" Tracey said.

"I thought it was good" Lewis defended.

 **End Interview**

Chet jumps over the vaulting horse next.

"You know he's pretty good" Geoff commented.

"Yeah, because he takes rhythmic gymnastics" Lorenzo said. "Waste of time if you ask me. I take karate which is way more useful"

"That's cool" Geoff said. "You each bring different skills to the table. Totally makes you a good team"

"Good team?" Lorenzo said seeming confused.

Meanwhile at the Chill Zone Owen and Noah make it to there next.

"Second!" Don announced.

"Alright!" Owen cheered.

After them Emma and Kitty are the next ones there.

"Third!" Don said.

"Yes! This is the best we've done yet!" Emma said.

Back at the training centre Ryan is having trouble crossing the balance beam.

"Easy does it..." Ryan said nervously.

Ryan tries to do the jump but hits his leg on the side of the balance beam and falls off.

"I think I may have injured something!" Ryan said.

"Get up! Walk it off! We need to hurry!" Stephanie demeaned. "If that's okay with you"

 **Team Interview**

"I'm staying calm" Stephanie said.

"Y-yeah, you're doing great babe" Ryan said.

"You're doing great to..." Stephanie said. "But you could be doing greater! That's what we need! Greater!"

 **End Interview**

Ellody is writing something down on a piece of paper.

"Ellody here are the calculations about when you should jump for maximum performance" Ellody said.

Ellody hands Mary the paper.

"These shall be most beneficial" Mary said.

Bonnie walks up behind her.

"I can't read this" Bonnie said.

"It's simple" Mary said. "You see-"

"You know what I don't want to know" Bonnie interrupted. "I already wasted enough time waiting for you in that graveyard"

Meanwhile back at the Chill Zone. Lewis and Tracey run over to the carpet.

"Fourth!" Don announced.

"Hey have you by any chance seen Action Man 8?" Lewis asked Don.

"I did" Don said. "It was hilarious"

"It wasn't a comedy..." Lewis said.

"Oh..." Don said.

"Told you" Tracey said smugly.

After them Chet and Lorenzo get there.

"Fifth!" Don announced.

"Yeah!" Chet cheered.

"Alright!" Lorenzo exclaimed.

Kelly and Taylor are the next ones to make it there.

"Sixth!" Don announced.

"Yes!" Kelly said.

Kelly hug Taylor.

"Mom please stop" Taylor said. "This makes me feel uncomfortable"

Back in the training centre Jay is on the balance beam. Unlike the others Jay is slowly inching across rather standing.

"You can do it Jay!" Mickey cheered from the sidelines.

The camera pans over to Devin going over the vaulting horse. He ends up landing flat on his back.

"Did I make it?" Devin asked.

The judge gives him a thumbs down.

"Damn it" Devin said.

Carrie helps Devin up.

"Let's try again" Carrie said.

"Thanks" Devin said.

After Devin gets up Rock flips over the vaulting horse and sticks the landing. The judge gives him a thumbs up.

"Woohoo!" Rock cheered. "Let's go Spud!"

The camera pans over to Ryan once again struggling on the balance beam.

"It's called a balance beam, not a wobble beam! So balance!" Stephanie said angrily.

Stephanie's shouting makes Ryan nervous and he slips and hits his crotch on the balance beam.

"Oh come on!" Stephanie shouted.

"Bad news babe... I don't think we can have kids now..." Ryan said weakly.

Back at the Chill Zone Crimson and Ennui calmly walk over to the carpet of completion.

"Seventh!" Don said. "Or rather, you would be in seventh if you didn't break the rule with the coffin. Ten minuet penalty!"

"Totally worth it" Crimson said.

Back at the training centre Tom gets over the vaulting horse by jumping over it rather than flipping.

"Ta da!" Tom said.

The judge gives him a thumbs down.

"Fine be that way" Tom said.

After Tom gets out of the way Ryan starts running towards the vaulting horse. Halfway there he trips over and hits his head on the spring board.

"Ugh! What is your problem!" Stephanie shouted from the sidelines.

After Ryan gets up Trevor gets over the vaulting horse but misses the mat completely and lands on the floor.

"I'm okay..." Trevor said weakly. "I had a bunch of handkerchiefs in my shirt... It cushioned my fall"

Trevor gets out of the way and Jay jumps over the vaulting horse. He lands flat on his face.

"Ow!" Jay exclaimed.

Meanwhile at the Chill Zone Dwayne and Junior make it there next.

"Seventh!" Don announced.

"I think we did surprisingly well today" Dwayne said.

After them Sanders and MacArthur make it there next.

"Eighth!" Don announced.

"Still better than what we had before" MacArthur said.

"Agreed" Sanders said.

Cut to a black background.

"Ninth!" Don said as a picture of Mary and Ellody appears.

"Tenth!" Don announced followed by a picture of Bonnie and Jack.

"Eleventh!" Don said followed by a picture of Geoff and Brody appearing.

"Twelfth!" Don announced as a picture of Rock and Spud appeared.

Cut back to the physical Chill Zone. Carrie and Devin run over to the Carpet of Completion.

"Thirteenth!" Don announced.

"We'll take what we can get" Devin said.

"With only four teams out there the Goths look nervous" Don said.

Don gestures to Crimson and Ennui who have their usual vacant expressions.

"Well... Nervous on the inside" Don said.

Back at the training centre Trevor flips over the vaulting horse. This time he sticks the landing.

"Yes!" Trevor cheered.

"Come on let's go" Melvin said. "I'm not going to be in last"

Melvin and Trevor leave. Jay jumps over the horse and lands on his back.

"I'm guessing I didn't pass" Jay said weakly.

The judge nods. Mickey helps Jay off the ground.

"Remember what you said earlier today?" Mickey asked.

"That I hoped there weren't any werewolves?" Jay asked.

"No the other thing" Mickey said.

"I've got nothing" Jay said.

"You said that if you pushed yourself you could do anything" Mickey said. "So give this next one your best shot"

"I'll try" Jay said nervously.

Jay and Mickey get out of the way and Ryan starts running towards the horse. Ryan doesn't go over the horse and hits his leg on it.

"AH! The pain!" Ryan exclaimed.

"You know who wins gold medals doing this!? Twelve year old girls!" Stephanie yelled.

"Yelling isn't helping" Ryan said.

"I can't help! This is all I'm allowed to do!" Stephanie said.

Ryan gets out of the way and Tom starts running towards the vaulting horse. He flips over it but this time goes too high up and hits his head on a ceiling light and electrocutes him. He falls to the ground face first.

"Tom!" Jen exclaimed.

Jen runs over to Tom.

"Tom are you okay?" Jen asked.

"I'm sorry... I'm so bad at gymnastics, you know my strengths are coordinating clothing" Tom said. "If you were doing this we'd already be done. You're so god at this"

"Tom, you're great at whatever you put your mind to... So great it sometimes gets annoying. But still great" Jen said.

"Thank you Jen. You're so sweet. This is why you're my best friend" Tom said.

Tom gets up.

"I won't let you down" Tom said. "I can do this"

"I know you can" Jen said. "And I'm even wearing your fez"

Jen puts on a fez.

Meanwhile at the Chill Zone Melvin and Trevor get there.

"Fourteenth!" Don announced.

"Why are we so slow?" Melvin asked.

"I don't know" Trevor said.

"Only three teams are left and the training centre. Crimson and Ennui are getting nervous" Don said.

Don gestures to them again but they still have no emotion on their face.

"You two are kind of a downer you know that" Don said.

 **Team Interview**

"Even if we're eliminated this will still be the best night ever" Crimson said.

"Being in that coffin... I have never felt so alive" Ennui said.

Both of them smile.

 **End Interview**

Back at the training centre Stephanie, Jen, and Mickey are cheering on their partners.

"You've got this Tom!" Jen said.

" I know you can do it Jay!" Mickey cheered.

"You should have been done an hour ago!" Stephanie yelled.

"You're the best buddy!" Jen cheered.

"You have my support!" Mickey said.

"I am so disappointed in you" Stephanie said.

Tom is the first one up. He gets and running start and flips over the vaulting horse. He lands on his feet.

"Did I do it?" Tom asked.

The judge gives him a thumbs up.

"Let's go Tom!" Jen said.

Jen grabs Tom's arm and they start running. Jay is the next one up. He flips over the vaulting horse and sticks the landing.

"I did it... I did it!" Jay said triumphantly. "Mickey! You were right!"

"That's great! Now let's go!" Mickey said.

Jay and Mickey run off. Ryan runs and flips over the vaulting horse.

"Yes! Finally!" Ryan cheered.

"We aren't in the clear yet!" Stephanie said. "Let's move it"

The three teams start running towards the Chill Zone.

"Jen! I'm sorry! The blog was your idea" Tom said.

"No Tom you made so many great changes" Jen said.

"Let's just settle for co-creators" Tom said.

"Ryan! We need to speed up!" Stephanie yelled.

"I'm running as fast as I can babe" Ryan said.

"We can still win right Jay?" Mickey asked.

"If I was able to land that flip then I guess anything is possible" Jay said.

Closer to the Chill Zone Crimson and Ennui are still waiting for their penalty to end.

"Goths, your penalty is up" Don said. "You have fifteenth place"

"Woohoo..." Crimson said unemotionally.

Tom and Jen make it there next.

"Sixteenth!" Don announced.

"Yes! We're still in this!" Jen cheered.

Ryan and Stephanie run over to Don.

"Seventeenth!" Don announced.

"Yes" Ryan said.

"How can you say "Yes" we're second to last" Stephanie said.

"At least we didn't lose" Ryan said.

Jay and Mickey disappointedly walk over to the Carpet of Completion.

"Jay, Mickey, I'm sorry but you've lost" Don said. "If it makes you feel any better nobody thought you'd get this far. Our prop guy Ed bet you'd quit after the first challenge in Toronto"

"It was a good run" Jay said.

Clips of Jay and Mickey play while they narrate over them.

"We lost but I'm still happy. Our doctor said we'd last three day" Jay said over a clip of them crashing into Emma and Kitty on their hang glider.

"Our physiotherapist said one day" Mickey said over a clip of them coughing from breathing in cinnamon in Morocco.

"Our gym teacher just laughed at us" Jay said over a clip of him failing at the vaulting horse.

"We came really far and I'm proud of what we did" Mickey said as the footage switched to them walking down the road towards the airport while a bunch of bats fly overhead.

"You know there are a lot of bats all of a sudden" Jay said.

"As long as they aren't werewolves I'm fine" Mickey said.

"We should start running though" Jay said.

"Good idea!" Mickey said.

* * *

 **I'm really liking writing this. I really liked working with the setting in this chapter. Small side note I changed the title of the chapter from the title of the episode because it was too long for me to fit. As for the elimination despite liking Jay and Mickey I couldn't think of any ways to expand on their canon plot and I didn't like how they got eliminated in canon. So I figured to get rid of them early and let Tom and Jen stay in the race. Also Tom and Jen now have an extended role in this. Let me know what you think of that.**


	8. Hawaiian Honeyruin

"Last time on the Ridonculous Race! The teams visited the counts creepy crib. God, I love alliteration. Crimson and Ennui actually liked it and even cracked a smile. However other teams cracked under the pressure... When I say teams I mean mostly Ryan and Stephanie. Josee and Jacques secured first once again and I think Emma may have caught Noah's eye. Sadly despite being more confident and coming over great odds Jay and Mickey ended up being the ones going home. Who will overcome the odds this time? Find out on: The Ridonculous Race!"

Don is standing by the Don Box in Romania.

"I'm here in Romania where yesterday's first place team is about to get their travel tip" Don said.

Josee and Jacques walk up to the Don Box and take their travel tip.

"Take a donkey cart to the airport and from there you fly to... Hawaii!" Josee read.

Cut to a background of the American flag with a picture of a Hawaiian beach to accompany it.

"Hawaii: Home of great beaches, ukulele music, and shirts that should never be worn un-ironically" Don narrated.

Cut to Don standing in the Hawaiian airport next to a Don Box wearing a Hawaiian shirt.

"After making it here they must find this Don Box" Don explained.

Don notices the Hawaiian shirt on the Don Box.

"Ha, ha, very funny guys" Don said sarcastically. "Was that you Greg?"

Back in Romania the Sisters, Ice Dancers, and Reality TV Pros are sharing the same donkey cart. Kitty is playing charades with Owen and acting out a camera.

"Um... Goal post!" Owen guesed. "Rectangle face? A box of candy!"

Kitty facepalms. The camera focuses on Josee and Jacques who are annoyed with Kitty and Owen.

 **Team Interview**

"Playing is for children" Josee said. "We stay focused on winning"

"I'm so focused I haven't washed my lucky boxers since the race started" Jacques said.

"That's not focused that's just gross" Josee said.

"Well maybe people think carrying a severed rabbits foot for luck is gross" Jacques said.

Josee pulls her lucky rabbits foot out of her pocket and looks at it.

"Don't listen to him Bun-Bun" Josee said.

Josee kisses the rabbits foot.

"Ew..." Jacques said.

 **End Interview**

Owen is still trying to guess what Kitty is saying.

"Cheesecake?" Owen guessed.

"Click" Kitty said.

"Exploding cheesecake?" Owen guessed.

"Owen, it's a camera. She said click" Noah said.

"Thank you" Emma said. "That was starting to get annoying"

"Um... You're welcome" Noah said.

The cart goes over a bumpy patch in the road and Josee's lucky rabbits foot falls out of her pocket but she doesn't notice.

Behind them the, Mom & Daughter, Actors, and Stepbrothers are in their cart.

"This donkey smells" Chet said.

"He said the same thing about you" Lorenzo said.

"A talking donkey? That makes no sense" Chet said.

"It must make sense because I'm talking to one" Lorenzo said. "Call me when you get a good comeback"

"You're a poo-head!" Chet yelled.

"Shut up back there!" Lewis yelled angrily. "You sound like you're five!"

"Lewis don't shout too much. You need to stay calm" Tracey said. "Just talk to some people who aren't totally nuts"

Lewis looks at Taylor and Kelly and they decide to talk to them.

"So, what's it like going around the world with your mom" Lewis said. "I wouldn't know. Me and my mom never really liked each other. She only let me eat sugar on Sundays. Sorry I went off topic. It must be nice travelling with her"

"Not really" Taylor said.

"Taylor's more of a daddy's girl" Kelly said.

"Me and dad a lot in common" Taylor said. "We love being sucessful and we hate avocado"

"You know what I'm just not gonna talk to anyone" Lewis said.

"Good idea" Tracey said.

Meanwhile behind them the Goths, Magicians, and Best Friends are on their cart. Crimson and Ennui somehow look sadder than usual.

 **Team Interview**

"Leaving Romania is though" Ennui said. "But leaving here to go to a tropical paradise like Hawaii is just... It makes me feel terrible"

"Not in the good way" Crimson said.

 **End Interview**

In the very back the Daters and Fashion bloggers are in the last cart.

"Do you have a whip? This donkey needs to go faster" Stephanie said.

"I didn't see one when we got on" Ryan said.

"Well look again. unless you want to lose!" Stephanie said.

"I had one back here but it fell off the cart" Jen said.

"Are you kidding me!" Stephanie yelled.

"Maybe you should relax a bit" Ryan said. "Just sit back and-"

Stephanie ignores him and jumps off the cart. She walks over to the donkey.

"Listen up you horse wannabe! Move it or I make you move!" Stephanie shouted. "Mush! Mush!"

"Babe that only works on sled dogs" Ryan said.

 **Team Interview**

"We were so stressed out" Stephanie said. "But then it didn't matter because all the teams were on the same flight"

"You could have saved us a lot of trouble by not freaking out" Ryan said.

"Don't criticize me" Stephanie said.

 **End Interview**

The plane lands in Hawaii and all the teams rush out. The Sisters and Reality TV Pros are the first ones to make it to the Don Box.

"Here we go" Owen said.

Before he can get the travel tip Emma pushes him and Noah out of the way.

"This one's ours" Emma said. "You might as well give up now"

"Uh oh, you're about to get Noah'd" Owen said. "He's got a snarky quip for every situation"

"No it's cool" Noah said. "She can have the first travel tip"

"Wait, what?!" Owen said.

Kitty takes the travel tip.

"It's a Botch or Watch" Kitty read. "In this challenge whoever didn't do gymnastics in Romania has to dive for wedding rings... What?"

Cut to Don standing on some docks by a bay of water.

"In this challenge botchers must retrieve wedding rings from the bottom of Hawaii's most popular wedding bay" Don explained.

Cut back to Kitty reading.

"And then swim to the tip of the bay to meet your partner" Kitty read. "Come on Emma let's go!"

Emma and Kitty run off.

"Come on Noah let's follow them" Owen said.

"Maybe we should let them get a bit of a head start" Noah said.

Owen gives Noah a weird look.

"Do you have rabies?" Owen asked.

Owen and Noah leave the airport and Josee and Jacques run over to the Don Box.

"Wait something's missing" Josee said. "My rabbits foot! I lost my Bun-Bun!"

"Josee, you don't need it" Jacques said. "It's just like with my underpants. It's a stupid superstition"

"Then take off your lucky boxers then" Josee said.

Jacques awkwardly looks around before running away from her.

"That's what I thought!" josee yelled.

Over by the docks more teams jump in.

"Spud you're up" Rock said.

"What am I doing?" Spud asked.

"Diving" Rock answered.

"I am!" Spud said. "Alright!"

Spud jumps into the water.

"Here I go!" Jacques yelled.

Jacques gracefully dives into the water.

The camera pans over to Kitty who looks nervous about diving into the water.

"You know it looks pretty deep" Kitty said.

"Just imagine it's the pool at nana's condo" Emma said. "Just with less... Old people floating around. Now get out there"

Emma pushes Kitty into the water.

"Ah!" Kitty exclaimed.

Kitty lands in the water. After she gets up she glares at Emma.

"You shoved me!" Kitty said angrily.

"It was a push of encouragement" Emma said. "And besides you're okay"

The camera pans over to Carrie and Devin.

"Good luck" Devin said.

"Thanks" Carrie said.

Carrie hugs Devin.

"Um... Shouldn't you be looking for the ring?" Devin asked.

"Right" Carrie said.

Carrie jumps in the water.

The camera pans over to Tom and Jen.

"Jen, we need to get back in the game" Tom said. "Are you ready to jump?"

"Hold on I'm not ruining this outfit with salt water" Jen said.

"I swam with sharks in my outfit and I didn't complain" Tom said.

"Yeah but yours can stand salt water" Jen said. "I just need to change"

"Be sure to hurry" Tom said.

"Got it" Jen said.

Jen walks off.

The camera pans over to Melvin and Trevor.

"Hey Trevor before I go in I have a question" Melvin said. "Do you think I should do an evil laugh?"

"Maybe you should just drop the villain thing" Trevor suggested. "You're too much of a nice guy"

"Every good reality show needs a villain" Melvin said.

"I can think some other people are better suited" Trevor said.

"Like who?" Melvin asked.

"Those Ice Dancers seem kind of evil" Trevor said.

"They aren't evil. They're just French" Melvin said. "Now if you'll excuse us I have a wedding ring to find"

Melvin jumps in the water.

The camera pans over to MacArthur and Geoff diving into the water with their partners watching them.

"Woo! Go MacArthur! You're awesome!" Brody cheered.

"I'm her partner remember" Sanders said.

"Oh right... You did pretty good to Geoff" Brody said.

Meanwhile underwater the teams are looking for the rings. Jacques picks up a rock and a small squid swims out from under it and sprays ink in his face. Jacques swims away from the squid and sees a wedding ring. Jacques grabs it and swims to the surface.

"Josee! I got the ring!" Jacques announced.

"I'll meet you at the beach!" Josee called down to him.

Josee runs to go meet Jacques.

The camera pans over to Tom waiting for Jen to come back.

"Come on where is she?" Tom asked nervously.

Jen runs back over to Tom now wearing a purple swim suit.

"I'm back" Jen said.

"Oh my God. That looks absolutely fabulous on you" Tom said.

"Thanks" Jen said. "Now I need to find some rings"

Jen jumps into the water.

The camera pans over to Taylor stretching before jumping in with Kelly watching.

"Um, sweetie, maybe this is the part where you should be in the water" Kelly said.

"Chill mom, remember all my swim trophies" Taylor said. "There are like a billion of them"

 **Team Interview**

"I have so many trophies my daddy had to reinforce the wall to hold them all up" Taylor said. "And my swim coach told my mom that I was the best student he'd _ever_ seen"

"Well..." Kelly said. "Actually sweetie-"

"Ever" Taylor interrupted.

 **End Interview**

Taylor jumps into the water. She lands face first and slowly starts sinking into the water.

"I might have exaggerated what a coach said just a tad..." Kelly said to the camera.

Ryan and Stephanie make it to the bay next.

"You're gonna be great Steph" Ryan said. "Just get in there and do your best"

"Aw... Your great" Stephanie said. "But let's save the pep talk for when you're doing something since you're the one that struggles!"

Stephanie jumps in the water.

"Go team..." Ryan said flatly.

Chet and Lorenzo get there next.

"Ha! This time you have to swim!" Chet said.

"Shut up" Lorenzo said.

"Just get in there" Chet said.

Chet pushes Lorenzo into the bay. After he lands Stephanie pops her head out of the water out of breath.

"Why aren't you helping me?!" Stephanie angrily asked Ryan.

"It's a Botch or Watch. All I'm allowed to do is watch" Ryan said.

"You. Are. The worst!" Stephanie said angrily.

Meanwhile Josee is running along the beach.

"I'm in the lead! Jacques was right. I don't need a good luck charm" Josee said.

Josee stops in her tracks when she sees a rock shaped like a trophy.

"Never mind I totally do" Josee said.

Josee picks it up.

"It's so light, and warm" Josee said. "It's beautiful! Come on rock, we have a race to win"

An old Hawaiian man grabs Josee by the shoulder and stops her.

"Wait!" The man said. "You can't take a lava rock as a souvenir"

"You have a whole volcano full of them. Just chill out grampa" Josee said.

Josee runs off with the lava rock.

Meanwhile underwater Kitty and Stephanie see the same ring. They both grab it and start fighting over it. Both of them spot a shark charging towards them. Stephanie lets go of the ring and punches the shark in the nose. The shark swims away. Stephanie looks back and sees that Kitty grabbed the ring. Kitty swims to the surface.

"I got it sis!" Kitty cheered.

Carrie comes out of the water next to her.

"Devin I got the ring" Carrie announced.

"Carrie, you're amazing!" Devin said.

Carrie blushes a bit.

"Did you just blush?" Kitty asked.

"No, I just have a sunburn" Carrie lied.

"You're in love with him aren't you" Kitty said.

 **Team Interview**

"When love is in the air I have this sense" Kitty said. "Sort of like an alarm. And it's been going off a lot recently"

"What are you talking about?" Emma asked.

"Nothing" Kitty said. "So... Notice any cute guys on the other teams"

"I don't know what you're trying to say" Emma said.

"Sure you do" Kitty said.

 **End Interview**

Kitty and Carrie are now talking.

"I want to tell him but I don't know if he likes me back. And he already has a girlfriend" Carrie said. "Promise not to say anything?"

"I promise" Kitty said.

Meanwhile Jack is floating on his back and looking out of breath.

"Why is it so wet... And sunny..." Jack said weakly.

Ellody swims over to him.

"What are you doing?" Ellody asked.

"Well I found the ring... Now I just need enough energy to get out of here" Jack said.

"I already found mine" Ellody said. "Me and Marry are just going to get to the next travel tip"

"Okay... I'll just try not to get eaten by seagulls who think I'm a dead dolphin... Again" Jack said.

"You need any help?" Ellody asked. "You look a little bloated"

"I always look like this... Me and Bonnie will catch up with you" Jack said.

"If you insist" Ellody said.

Meanwhile Josee and Jacques are reunited and find the next Don Box.

"We're still in first place" Josee said. "And I have a new good luck charm"

Josee shows Jacques her lava rock.

"Nothing can stop us now!" Jacques cheered.

Josee takes the travel tip from the Don Box.

"In this All In you must perform a Hawaiian wedding ritual by... Walking on fire!" Josee read.

Cut to Don walking across some hot coals.

"... Technically coals" Don said. "In this challenge brides wear grass skirts and grooms wear wreaths. Grooms must carry their brides over this path of hot coals"

Don twitches from trying to suppress the burning pain.

"It's a test of... Strength... And honour" Don said. "If any part of them catches fire... They must go back to the start!"

Don screams and runs off. He gets off the coals and falls to the ground.

"Once they reach the other side it's a race to the Chill Zone" Don said.

Don looks down at his scorched feet.

"Great, now I have to take foot modelling off my resume" Don said.

Back underwater Noah sees two wedding rings. He looks around quickly before snatching them both up. Noah swims to the surface.

"I got two rings" Noah said.

"I'll meet you by the shore" Owen said.

Owen runs off and Noah starts swimming. After they leave Taylor swims to the surface.

"Mom, I got the ring" Taylor said.

"That's great" Kelly said. "Hurry over to the shore. I'll meet you"

"Don't sweat it mom" Taylor said.

Taylor starts swimming towards the shore slowly and making short jerky movements.

"She's really something" Kelly said awkwardly.

Meanwhile Noah swims towards the shore and Owen runs along the beach trying to catch up. Halfway there Noah start flailing his arms around and struggling to swim.

"Ah! Something's got me!" Noah yelled. "I think it's a shark!"

"Oh my God! Somebody help him!" Owen exclaimed. "Oh no! Why wasn't I born a merman?!"

Noah grabs whatever was holding on to him and drags it to the surface. What was holding him turns out to be Melvin.

"Give me your ring!" Melvin exclaimed. "I want to be evil! Come on. Please. Pretty please"

"Here you go" Noah said. "I was going to sell this one for money"

Noah hands him his spare ring.

"OH NO! Noah's dying!" Owen exclaimed.

Cut to Noah sitting on the beach talking to the camera.

"I'm not getting soft. Melvin was just so pathetic" Noah said. "I may be distracted by Emma a bit. But just because I'm in love doesn't make me a nice person. So what if I let Emma take the first travel tip and gave her and Kitty a head start... And just now I gave some guys I barely know my spare ring because I felt sorry for them..."

Noah quickly gets up and runs off screen.

"Give me back my ring you stupid magician!" Noah yelled.

Meanwhile Josee and Jacques are competing in the first challenge.

"Remember Jacques: This is one giant mind game. Just like the Olympics" Josee said.

"This challenge is pretty easy" Jacques said.

"Just try not to think about the coals" Josee said.

"Well now that you mentioned them I'm thinking about them" Jacques said.

"Well try not to think about the coals" Josee said.

"That just made me think about them more!" Jacques yelled.

Jacques' grass skirt catches fire. Jacques tosses Josee to the side and run off the coals and jumps in the water.

"That's better..." Jacques said.

Brody starts across the coals while carrying Geoff in his arms.

"Remember that time we went paddle boarding in the Yukon and we forgot our wetsuits. So cold bro" Geoff said.

"Yeah, keep going" Brody said.

"And remember that time your tongue froze to that flagpole" Geoff said. "Or when I poured that slushie down your shorts. That was crazy dude"

Brody makes it to the end of the coal path.

"We made it!" Brody cheered. "Yeah! Ow my feet... I wish I had an ice slushie"

Geoff and Brody start running towards the Chill Zone.

Back at the beginning of the coal path more teams are putting on their grass skirts and wreaths.

"Do you really think I should tell Devin?" Carrie asked Kitty.

"Life's short" Kitty said. "Go for it"

Kitt leaves Carrie and walks over to Owen.

"Cool we're both grooms" Kitty said.

"Not for me" Owen said. "I'm about to marry a dead guy"

"What do you mean?" Kitty asked.

"Look at Noah. He's been acting so weirdly nice" Owen said. "He is so sick"

"No, he just likes my sister" Kitty said.

"Oh... That explains a lot" Owen said.

The camera pans over to Mary and Ellody writing some stuff down in a notebook.

"So have we finally agreed on the best strategy to get across these coals are?" Mary asked.

"Yes" Ellody said. "I say we soak our feet in the ocean before starting"

"Well I say we cover our feet in mud" Mary said.

"How about we compromise" Ellody said. "We soak our feet in the ocean then cover them in mud"

"I just realized we were planning this for forty five minuets" Mary said.

"Genius takes time" Ellody said. "Now come on let's start with the cooling process"

Meanwhile Jack finally gets out of the water and Bonnie meets him.

"Took you long enough" Bonnie complained.

"Come on let's see what this next challenge is" Jack said.

They take the travel tip.

"Okay it says we have to... What!" Bonnie read. "I am not doing that"

"I know, you're my cousin. I don't think we can legally get married in this state" Jack said.

"I meant the scorching hot coals we'll be walking across" Bonnie said.

"Oh... Yeah that's pretty bad to" Jack said.

"Were you ever dropped as an infant?" Bonnie asked.

"No. Even if I was I probably wouldn't remember" Jack said.

Meanwhile back at the bay Ryan and Stephanie are the last ones still looking for rings.

"I can't find any more rings" Stephanie said. "I think they're all gone"

"There have to be more. Keep on looking" Ryan said. "Come on Steph you can-"

"What part of NONE, don't you understand?!" Stephanie shouted.

"Stephanie! You're over competitiveness is out of control!" Ryan said. "I am so close to leaving!"

"I am not over competitive" Stephanie said.

"You're sweet Stephanie, but when things get competitive you turn into the a raging psychotic bull!" Ryan yelled.

"Bulls are male you idiot!" Stephanie said.

"Then you're a cow!" Ryan said.

Meanwhile back at the path of coals more teams are suiting up.

"I don't skirt" MacArthur said.

"I figured you'd say that" Sanders said.

The camera pans over to Tom and Jen. Jen is wearing her normal outfit once again.

"I am not being the groom. I just got a pedicure last week and I do not want to ruin it with hot coals" Tom said.

"Well I had a foot massage last week and I would hate to have to get another one after burning them" Jen said. "And besides you're bigger than me. It'd be easier for you to carry me"

"You have a point" Tom said. "Fine, I'll do it for the blog"

The camera pans over to Dwayne and Junior.

"I can't wear the skirt" Junior said. "All my friends at school will see this"

"Yeah but if I wear it you have to carry me over hot coals" Dwayne said.

"My classmate Larry Finkle spent all of last year getting shoved into his own locker because his named rhymed with tinkle" Junior said. "You wear the skirt"

"Heh Finkle. That is a funny name" Dwayne said.

Carrie and Devin are preparing to walk over the coals.

"Are you ready?" Devin asked.

"You bet" Carrie said.

Devin picks up Carrie.

"Oh! Um... Wow" Carrie said. "You're really strong"

"Thanks. Now come on let's win this thing" Devin said.

Devin starts walking across the coals.

Meanwhile at the Chill Zone Don is sitting in a lawn chair and sipping a smoothie.

"Mmm... Passion fruit. Nice" Don commented.

Geoff and Brody rush over to the Carpet of Completion.

"Geoff, Brody, congratulations you're today's winners" Don said.

Geoff and Brody hug.

"I love you man!" Geoff said.

"I'd marry you all over again" Brody said.

"I always cry at weddings" Don said.

Meanwhile back on the coals Devin and Carrie are now almost all the way across.

"First place here we come!" A voice from behind them shouted.

They look behind them to see Josee and Jacques. Jacques is now running across the coals rather than walking. Jacques skirt catches fire and they both go running back to the ocean.

Meanwhile Taylor finally gets to the shore where Kelly is waiting for her.

"There you are" Kelly said.

"Took you long enough to get here" Taylor said.

Taylor takes the travel tip and looks at it.

"No way am I walking on hot coals" Taylor said. "Do you have any idea how much my gel pedi cost?"

"Yes. You used my credit card to pay for it" Kelly said angrily.

"Just listen to the leader" Taylor said.

"And what makes you the leader?" Kelly asked.

"Because I'm the one with leader and training certification" Taylor said.

Back on the coal walk Carrie and Devin make it off.

"Made it" Devin said.

"Hey Best Friends, move it or lose it!" Josee said.

Jacques and Josee are running across the coals once again. This time they make it across.

"Let's go!" Carrie said.

The Ice Dancers and Best Friends start racing towards the Chill Zone.

"Believe in the lava rock and we will own this race!" Josee cheered.

Jacques trips over a rock on the ground and falls over.

Carrie and Devin out run them and make it the Chill Zone.

"Second place!" Don announced.

Josee and Jacques walk over to him next.

"Which means the Ice Dancers get bronze" Don mocked.

"We hate bronze! Even more than silver!" Josee said angrily.

Meanwhile back next to the coal pit Crimson is colouring in her grass skirt with a black marker.

"I only wear black" Crimson said.

"Even if it's grass it has to be black" Ennui said.

Meanwhile more teams are walking across the coals. Sanders and MacArthur are in the lead. MacArthur is holding Sanders over her shoulder.

"Can you hold me in a less awkward way?" Sanders asked.

"Trust me Sanders this is the least awkward way possible" MacArthur said.

The camera pans back to Chet and Lorenzo. Chet is intentionally shoving his armpits into Lorenzo's face.

"Get your pits out of my face!" Lorenzo yelled.

"Get your face out of my pits" Chet said.

"That makes no sense!" Lorenzo said.

The camera pans back to Lewis and Tracey.

"You know for a show with the budget to travel to all these exotic places you think they'd be able to afford some stunt doubles" Lewis complained.

"Do you even know how reality shows work?" Tracey asked.

"No, I've always watched movies over TV" Lewis said.

The camera pans over to Melvin and Trevor.

"Mel I'm just saying, I really think you should drop this villain shtick" Trevor said.

"Trevor, I know what I'm doing" Melvin said. "It's just like that time I- Wait do you smell smoke"

"My skirt isn't on fire" Trevor said.

Melvin looks behind him and sees that his magicians cape is on fire.

"Yeah that'd about do it..." Melvin said awkwardly.

Melvin and Trevor start running back towards the ocean.

Meanwhile back at the Chill Zone the Reality TV Pros and Sisters are racing to get there first. Owen and Noah are the first ones to make it over to Don.

"Fourth!" Don announced.

Emma and Kitty make it there after that.

"Fifth!" Don said.

Dwayne and Junior are the next ones there followed by Chet and Lorezno.

"Sixth and seventh!" Don announced.

Sanders and MacArthur run over there next.

"Eighth!" Don announced.

Lewis and Tracey make it there next followed by Mary and Ellody.

"Ninth and tenth!" Don said.

Tom and Jen are the next ones to make it to the Carpet of Completion.

"Eleventh!" Don annoucned.

"Yes! We're catching up!" Jen cheered.

Meanwhile Spud is carrying Rock across the coals.

"Spud, can you feel the hot coals?" Rock asked.

"What coals?" Spud asked.

"Okay good, just checking" Rock said.

The camera pans back to Jack carrying Bonnie.

"Bonnie I'm not sure how much longer I can hold you up" Jack said.

"I swear to Christ if you drop me I will punch you" Bonnie said.

"Sorry I'm not very strong" Jack said.

"I know what to do" Bonnie said.

Bonnie climbs up on to Jack's shoulders.

"This feels weird..." Jack said.

"Just keep walking" Bonnie ordered.

The camera pans over to Kelly holding Taylor.

"Mom be careful" Taylor said.

"Taylor it is very hard for me to walk over these coals" Kelly said.

A flame jumps up and Taylor's grass skirt catches fire.

"Ah!" Taylor exclaimed. "Get me out of here!"

Kelly runs Taylor over to the ocean and drops her in.

Back on the coal walk Melvin and Trevor are making a second attempt.

"This time we've got this I can feel it" Melvin said.

"Mel your cape is on fire again" Trevor said.

Melvin looks behind him and sees his cape in flames once more.

"Crap... That'll cost a lot to replace" Melvin said.

Melvin and Trevor run off the coal walk.

Meanwhile back at the Chill Zone Crimson and Ennui are the next ones there.

"Twelfth!" Don announced.

Rock and Spud run over to the Chill Zone next.

"Thirteenth!" Don said.

"Alright! Rock and roll!" Rock cheered.

Jack and Bonnie are the next ones to make it over to Don.

"Fourteenth!" Don announced.

Kelly and Taylor are the next ones there.

"Fifteenth!" Don said.

"Well me made it" Kelly said. "It wasn't pretty, but we made it"

"You need to step your game up mom" Taylor said. "For serious"

"We're a team" Kelly said.

"I know you're not used to winning like me" Taylor said. "But you need to follow my example because-"

"You've never won anything in your life!" Kelly yelled. "Not one race! Not one medal! Nothing!"

"Wait what?" Taylor asked. "But what about my trophies?"

"You're dad bought a trophy store! Connect the dots! What kind of trophies come in the mail?!" Kelly said angrily. "And guess why paid your coaches and teachers to lie? That's right, daddy"

"But what about those beauty pageants I won?" Taylor asked. "You can't fake that"

"When you're as rich as we are you can fake anything" Kelly said.

"The coals were got, but that was cold" Don commented.

Back on the coals Melvin and Trevor are getting ready for another attempt.

"Okay, this time I got rid of the cape" Melvin said.

"Good, let's go" Trevor said.

Ahead of them Ryan and Stephanie are in the middle of the coal path.

"You smell like burnt meat" Stephanie said.

"You shouldn't insult someone who can drop you on to hot coals" Ryan threatened.

"If you do I'll tell your friends that you're chest muscles are implants" Stephanie said.

"Shut up! I couldn't care less about you right now!" Ryan shouted.

A small flame flies up from the coals and sets Stephanie's grass skirt on fire.

"Ah! Ryan put it out!" Stephanie exclaimed.

"I'll do something" Ryan said quickly.

Ryan runs off the coals and drops Stephanie into the ocean.

"Thanks, you saved my life" Stephanie said. "I thought you said you didn't care about me"

"I was just annoyed with you" Ryan said. "I'm sorry if I said anything bad about you"

"You shouldn't be sorry" Stephanie said. "I should. I pushed you too hard and wasn't considering what you thought"

"It's okay, all couples fight at some point" Ryan said. "You know I really meant it when you were sweet"

"Really" Stephanie said.

"Yes" Ryan said.

Stephanie quickly kisses him.

"Come on babe, we can still beat those magicians" Stephanie said. "I promise not to get over competitive"

"Let's go" Ryan said.

Meanwhile Don is still waiting for the other teams.

"Man this has been the best place we've been yet" Don commented. "We really need to go to more places like this"

Melvin and Trevor run up to Don.

"Congrats you are in sixteenth" Don said.

"Yes!" Melvin cheered.

Melvin starts laughing evilly.

"Is he okay?" Don asked.

"He'll be fine" Trevor said.

Melvin's evil laughter turns into regular laughter and he falls to the ground.

"Get him out" Don said.

Trevor drags him away. Ryan and Stephanie make it there next.

"Did we make it first?" Stephanie asked.

"No you got seventeenth" Don said. "Which means you're out"

"I'm sorry Steph" Ryan said.

"It's okay" Stephanie said. "I'm just glad we got to compete together on national television"

"International actually we're really big in Croatia" Don said. "Now would you kindly get off my show?"

Clips of Ryan and Stephanie competing play while they narrate.

"Man, it sucks that we got kicked off" Ryan said as a clip of them making out in the French catacombs played.

"Sorry about going all psycho" Stephanie narrated over a clip of her yelling at Ryan in Iceland.

"So now what?" Ryan asked over a clip of them falling in the ravine in Brazil.

"Well we're in Hawaii. Every couple wants to go here" Stephanie said as the scene changes to them walking along the beach.

"Let's go check into a hotel" Ryan said.

"Great idea" Stephanie said.

* * *

 **And this is the first time that a non elimination round is now an elimination round. This is because since there are more teams there are now less non elimination rounds. Also I toned down Noah's in love-ness a bit because it came off as really creepy in canon. As for the elimination Ryan and Stephanie leaving earlier is a huge difference. Their constant arguing got annoying really fast in canon. Between Chet and Lorenzo as well as Kelly and Taylor we have enough of that. So I just decided to wrap up their plot early. I hope it wasn't too rushed.**


	9. Hello and Dubai

"Last time on the Ridonculous Race! Our teams took a scorching stroll through Hawaii. Geoff and Brody took first. Josee found a new good luck charm which may not be so lucky. Kelly finally told Taylor what she really thought of her. And Trevor tried to tell Melvin that he sucked at being evil. Ryan and Stephanie were able to kiss and make up but that still didn't stop them from coming in last and being eliminated. Let the madness continue. This is: The Ridonculous Race!"

Don is standing next to a Don Box in Hawaii.

"Yesterday's Chill Zone is today's starting point" Don said. "Geoff and Brody are up first"

Geoff and Brody go up to the Don Box.

"Alright! Let's go!" Geoff said.

 **Team Interview**

"I don't know what's crazier: That we're in first. Or that we're not in last" Geoff said.

"Dude, that's deep" Brody said.

 **End Interview**

Brody takes a travel tip from the Don Box.

"It says we have to go to Dubay... Dibbi... I got nothing" Brody said.

Cut to the flag of the United Arab Emirates with a postcard for Dubai to accompany it.

"More commonly pronounced Dubai: An oasis of luxury" Don narrated. "It has man made islands and a mall so big even teens get lost"

Cut to Don standing at the base of a giant tower.

"Once here teams must race to the worlds only seven star hotel for their next travel tip" Don explained.

Cut to the first seven teams rushing towards the airport. Josee and Jacques make it to the clerk first.

"Flights to Dubai please" Josee said.

"We have a flight leaving now. Twelve seats" The clerk said.

Dwanye and Junior are the last ones through the doors.

"Dad I don't think we made it" Junior said.

"Nonsense Junior" Dwayne said. "See the man said there are twelve seats and there are already six teams here... Oh wait"

 **Team Interview**

"And already we're tied for last" Junior said.

"Remember in Iceland? We were on the first flight and it got delayed" Dwayne said. "Things will get better"

 **End Interview**

"While the others wait for their flight the first six teams get to fly air Dubai" Don narrated. "With the world's most awesome first class sections. For first placing teams only"

Geoff and Brody sit down on couch in first class and take a plate of cookies.

"Anyone else want one?" Brody asked.

"Yes please" Jacques said.

A flight attendant pushes Josee and Jacques out of the first class section.

"This is unfair" Jacques said. "We're athletes, how did we get third"

"With my lava rock as my new good luck charm we won't have to worry about that any more" Josee said. "It's like my mother always said: Bronze is the medal of shame!"

"Our luck can only improve" Jacques said.

The luggage compartment above him opens and various carry-on items fall on top of him.

"Now it can improve..." Jacques said weakly.

A bowling ball falls out and lands on his head.

"I'll just shut up now" Jacques said.

Cut to the other teams waiting in line for their plane tickets. Don is standing in front of them and talking to the camera.

"Both flights are heading to Dubai" Don said. "I'll be a quick flight"

Someone walks over to Don and whispers something to him.

"I have been informed that it will be a seventeen hour flight" Don said. "At least they'll be able to enjoy each other's company"

In the line Bonnie seems to be very angry at Jack.

"Why did you let Mary and Ellody get ahead of us?" Bonnie asked angrily. "I waited hours for them in that graveyard in Romania"

"Sorry" Jack said.

 **Team Interview**

"I'm just starting to think that we're weighing them down" Jack said.

"We aren't weighing them down" Bonnie said. "We're useful"

"If you say so..." Jack said.

"I do say so" Bonnie said.

"That doesn't make you right" Jack said.

 **End** **Interview**

Meanwhile on flight one Owen is sitting on Noah's lap.

"Do you have to do this?" Noah asked.

"Sure is cosy" Owen said.

 **Team Interview**

"Flying is the scariest" Owen said. "I usually squeeze my teddy bear Beary to get through it... But I swallowed him. So now I squeeze Noah"

Owen hug Noah tightly.

"My lungs..." Noah said weakly.

 **End Interview**

"So do you want the window seat?" Owen asked.

"No thanks" Noah said.

Noah looks across the aisle where Emma and Kitty are sitting.

"Hey Kitty do you think we should start an alliance?" Kitty asked. "With someone like... Noah and Owen"

 **Team Interview**

"I have enough trouble keeping Kitty on track" Emma said. "And remember what happened last time we had an alliance?"

"We ended up crashing our hang glider" Kitty said. "But this time it'll be better"

"I doubt that" Emma said.

 **End Interview**

"Noah's a snarky know it all" Emma said. "Do you have any idea what it's like to be around someone like that?"

"I can't imagine" Kitty said sarcastically. "But anyway, those two are more useful than Jay and Mickey"

The camera pans over to Owen and Noah. Owen coughs up a large piece of cotton.

"Oh, I think I found Beary..." Owen said.

"I'm gonna go over to the bathroom where it's less disgusting" Noah said.

Noah gets up and notices that Emma is also getting up.

"Hi..." Noah said.

"Um... Hi" Emma said.

Meanwhile on the second plane.

"You know this is exciting" Tracey said. "I have a bank account where we're going"

"I know, so do I" Lewis said. "And they have a giant mall there. This is going to be great"

"You know I filmed a spy movie there once" Tracey said.

"Wasn't that the movie that the media said killed your career?" Lewis asked.

"Let's forget about all that because we're almost halfway to Dubai!" Tracey said.

"Will you shut up!" Taylor yelled from behind them. "We're still on the ground!"

The camera pans back to Kelly and Taylor.

"I like how you handled that" Kelly said.

"That's nice. What are you going to do. Give me a fake trophy?" Taylor said.

 **Team Interview**

"Honey, I feel terrible about this" Kelly said.

"Oh, then all is forgiven... Psych! That means it's not" Taylor said.

 **End Interview**

"Mom, I'm giving you a time out" Taylor said.

"You can't do that" Kelly said.

Taylor starts holding her breath.

"Fine... I'll just go" Kelly said.

Kelly walks down the aisle and notices an open seat next to Dwayne and Junior.

"Hi, is this seat taken?" Kelly asked.

"No it isn't. But I am" Dwayne said. "Married... That is..."

"Dad, she isn't hitting on you" Junior said.

"Oh... Sorry" Dwayne said.

"No problem" Kelly said.

Kelly sits down next to them.

"I'm just having some issues with Taylor" Kelly said. "It started when-"

 **Team Interview**

"Play are cards right and we'll be on our way to our first alliance" Dwayne said.

Um... Have you met them?" Junior asked.

 **End Interview**

"- And I guess I shouldn't have told her the truth" Kelly finished.

"Well I can understand our opinions mean a lot to them" Dwayne said. "One time Junior made me pancakes for Father's Day and I told him they were overdone. He almost cried"

"Come on dad you promised not to talk about that" Junior said.

"The same thing happened to me" Kelly said. "Except I made the pancakes and Taylor threw them at me... And the pan"

"Um... Uh, well that's kids for you" Dwayne said.

The camera pans to elsewhere in the plane where Crimson and Ennui are.

"I am relieved to be leaving Hawaii" Crimson said.

"I know. It is the most miserable place I have been" Ennnui said. "Where are we going next?"

"Dubai" Crimson answered.

"I suppose it's not as depressing as Hawaii" Ennui said.

Meanwhile on flight one Emma and Noah are talking while Kitty and Owen watch them.

"Their so snarky and full of themselves" Kitty said.

"How are they not a couple" Owen said.

"It's Emma. She doesn't like talking about romance after her boyfriend Jake broke up with her" Kitty said.

"Ouch... Still fresh?" Owen asked.

"It was three years ago" Kitty said.

"Oh..." Owen said.

Cut to the plane landing at the Dubai airport.

"Flight one has landed and the teams are on their way to the Burj Al Arab!" Don narrated.

All the flight one teams are running towards the Don Box. Owen and Noah are the first ones to get a travel tip.

"It's an Either Or" Noah read. "Serve or squeegee"

Cut to Don standing on top of Burj Al Arab which has a tennis court on it. A strange looking robot is next to Don.

"Teams cane either return one serve each from this tennis serving robot we got on loan from some old sci-fi show" Don explained.

The Tennis Bot shoots a tennis ball at a dummy and demolishes it.

Cut to Don standing next to several window washing baskets elsewhere on the building.

"... Or wash an entire column of windows from the top down" Don said.

Back at the tennis court the Ice Dancers, Stepbrothers, Surfer Dudes, and Best Friends have chosen serve. Geoff and Brody are up first.

"Go Brody!" Geoff cheered.

 **Team Interview**

"Tennis is a wimp sport" Geoff said. "There's no tackling or contact. Just a fluffy ball"

"What could go wrong?" Brody asked.

 **End** **Interview**

"You've got this bro!" Geoff cheered.

"I know" Brody said.

The Tennis Bot shoots a tennis ball at Brody and hit hits him in the jaw.

"I don't got this..." Brody said weakly.

Brody walks off the court. Carrie gives Devin a nervous look.

"Whatever happens I believe in you" Devin said.

"Thanks" Carrie said.

Carrie walks on to the court.

"You know Shelly hangs out with her tennis instructor all the time and she says that tennis is a mental game" Devin said.

"She what" Carrie said.

While Carrie is distracted the Tennis Bot fires at her and knocks the tennis racket out of her hand. Chet laughs at her and a tennis ball hits him in the face.

 **Team Interview**

"Nice going jerk. Now we have to wait for our turn again" Lorenzo said.

"You're just jealous because I talked to the girl" Chet said.

"Laughing isn't talking" Lorenzo said.

"Yes it is!" Chet said.

"No it's not!" Lorenzo yelled.

 **End Interview**

Meanwhile back on flight two Kelly is still talking to Dwayne and Junior.

"... And after she crashed her third sports car I wanted to cut up her credit cards but I knew she'd steal mine. That's parenting right?" Kelly said.

"Well I guess teens are more challenging. To be honest Junior here is only thirteen so I don't really know" Dwayne said.

"Oh no, this was when Taylor was ten" Kelly corrected. "The real drama started when she was twelve"

"Um... Kelly I think the problem is that Taylor doesn't have proper boundaries" Dwayne said. "That or she was just born rotten"

"How dare you!" Kelly yelled.

Kelly throws a glass of water in his face before storming off.

"Good talk..." Dwayne said awkwardly.

 **Team Interview**

"I'm starting to think that Kelly and Taylor might not be the best team to partner with" Dwayne said.

"Yeah" Junior said.

 **End Interview**

Rock and Spud are relaxing on the plane.

"Hey Rock there's something on the wing" Spud said.

"Is it a bird?" Rock asked.

"No it's a guy in a teddy bear costume" Spud said.

"Have you been watching TV at night again?" Rock asked.

Back at the top of the Burj Al Arab the Sisters and Reality TV Pros are the only flight one teams that chose to clean windows.

"Hey, we're doing the same challenge what are the odds" Kitty said.

"Maybe we should work together" Owen suggested.

"No alliances remember" Emma whispered to Kitty.

Meanwhile at the airport the second flight lands. Melvin and Trevor are the first ones off the plane.

"Out of the way magicians coming through" Melvin said. "We need to make first place"

Melvin and Trevor are trampled by all the other teams.

"Never mind..." Trevor muttered.

Meanwhile Owen and Noah are still cleaning windows.

"How many have we done so far?" Owen asked.

"One..." Noah said flatly.

The camera pans over to Emma and Kitty. The wind blows and shakes their window cleaning basket.

"I'm starting to think this is more terrifying than tennis" Kitty said.

"Just help me lower this thing" Emma said. "The manual say we have to pull these two levers at the same time"

"Why would they design it like that?" Kitty asked.

"These people put a tennis court on the roof. Just don't question it" Emma said. "Let's pull the lever"

They both pull the levers. But they each pull them in opposite directions and the basket breaks and they all nearly tumble off. They grab on to the side to stay on.

"I'm gonna say that was your fault" Emma said.

"Of course you are" Kitty said.

At the bottom of the hotel the other teams arrive at the Don Box. Tom and Jen are the first ones to get the travel tip.

"Serve or squeegee" Jen read.

The teams look up and see Emma and Kitty dangling from the building.

"The correct option now seems obvious..." Ellody said.

The other flight two teams nod in agreement.

 **Team Interview**

"We aren't the most athletic" Mary said.

"But tennis is statistically safer option" Ellody said.

"I know we can do this" Mary said.

 **End Interview**

Mary steps up to the Tennis Bot.

"Time for some calculations" Mary said. "If the tennis ball is moving at-"

Mary is cut off by the Tennis Bot hitting her in the nose with a tennis ball.

"I wasn't done yet..." Mary said weakly.

Ellody drags Mary to safety.

"Yeah... We're switching to windows" Dwayne said.

"I have to agree with that" Melvin said.

"Us too" Kelly said.

"Why? I have a zillion tennis trophies in my... Oh... Right" Taylor said.

"Will of you be quiet! I'm trying to concentrate" Jacques said.

"Good luck" Devin said sarcastically.

Cut to Devin talking to the camera with Jacques preparing to face off against the Tennis Bot in the background.

"I've watched Shelly play a lot of tennis" Devin said. "And believe me, Jacques has a better chance at hitting a beach ball than a tennis ball"

Cut back to Jacques. The tennis bot fires at him and he hits the ball away.

"I'll shut up now..." Devin said.

Josee steps out on to the court next.

"I can do this" Josee said.

Josee takes out her lava rock and kisses it. The Tennis Bot fires at her and hits Josee in the head. Jacques runs over to her.

"Josee! We'll never make podium waiting for our turn again" Jacques said. "We need to switch to windows"

"Fine. But when we win I am throwing a massive tantrum" Josee declared.

 **Team Interview**

"Tantrums run in her family" Jacques explained. "One time I was late picking up Josee and her mother attacked me with a lamp!"

"I don't miss that lamp" Josee said.

"Or your mother" Jacques added.

 **End Interview**

Meanwhile Dwayne and Junior are washing the windows.

"Now son" Dwayne began. "The key to proper window washing is to-"

"Wipe the window?" Junior said.

"Yes... You're catching on fast" Dwayne said.

The camera pans over to Kelly and Taylor. Kelly is angrily glaring at Dwayne.

"Look at him. He thinks he's father of the year" Kelly said angrily. "Who is he to-"

"Mom get moving" Taylor interrupted.

"On it" Kelly said.

 **Team Interview**

"These challenges are good for Taylor and I" Kelly said. "At home we're so busy with are everyday lives"

"Actually, I'm a lot busier than he is but I try to squeeze her in" Taylor said.

 **End Interview**

Melvin and Trevor are cleaning the windows.

"You know I really think we should have stuck with tennis" Trevor said.

"Why's that?" Melvin asked.

"I have very bad vertigo" Trevor said.

"It's too late to switch again" Melvin said. "Just try not to think about what would happen if you fell"

"Well now I'm thinking about it" Trevor said.

Back by the tennis court MacArthur is preparing to fight the Tennis Bot.

"Ha! This hunk of metal has nothing on me" MacArthur bragged.

"Don't get too confident" Sanders said.

"Relax" MacArthur said.

The Tennis Bot fires at MacArthur and she hits the ball. The ball hits the Tennis Bot and causes it to fall off the building.

"And you broke it..." Sanders commented.

"Whoops... At least I hit the ball" MacArthur said.

Back at the windows Emma and Kitty manage to stabilize their window washing basket.

"Okay, let's get back to cleaning" Emma said.

"Right" Kitty said.

The Tennis Bot lands in their washing basket.

"Um... Is this part of the challenge?" Kitty asked nervously.

The Tennis Bot starts rapidly shooting tennis balls at them.

"Take cover!" Emma yelled.

Kitty uses her squeegee to deflect the tennis balls. However one of the tennis balls hits one of the levers and the basket tips to the right causing Emma and Kitty to fall out. Noah notices this.

"Emma! No!" Noah exclaimed.

Noah reaches out his hands and grabs Emma. Kitty grabs on to Emma's leg.

"Are you okay?" Noah asked.

"I nearly died. What do you think" Emma said. "But thanks anyway"

 **Team Interview**

"You know that moment when you realize that you might actually cared if someone died?" Noah said. "I never really had a moment like that... Until now"

"Wait not even me?" Owen asked.

 **Second Interview**

"Okay, so maybe Noah isn't the worst human being in the world" Emma said.

"That's the nicest thing she's ever said" Kitty said.

 **End Interviews**

Elsewhere Kelly and Taylor are arguing.

"Mom! Clean faster!" Taylor ordered.

"Yelling won't help, sweetie" Kelly said through gritted teeth.

"I yell at our maid all the time and that works" Taylor said.

Back up on the tennis court a helicopter brings a broken down looking Tennis Bot up.

"This should be easy for you Carrie" Devin said. "Anyone could hit a ball from that... Well almost everyone"

The camera pans over to Mary and Ellody frantically scribbling in their notebook.

"Mary, the robot is broken. We need to rewrite our calculations" Ellody said.

"I just got the calculations perfect" Mary said.

"It doesn't matter" Ellody said.

 **Team Interview**

"Switching to window washing might be a better option" Mary said.

"However the Burj Al Arab is 321 meters tall and a fall from that height could kill or at the very least seriously injure us" Ellody said.

"We'll take the safer route" Mary said.

 **End Interview**

Mary steps over to the Tennis Bot.

"I can do this" Mary said. "So what if the calculations are incomplete... Who am I kidding I'm not ready"

Bonnie walks over to her.

"Hi, it's me. Bonnie" Bonnie said. "Jack may have had a point earlier and he said that we haven't been helping you guys. So I'm here to help"

"Can't you see I'm trying to focus" Mary said.

"Mary, that piece of metal is broken down" Bonnie said. "Anyone can beat that thing. So try not to over think it. Anyway, I'm going to get out of here before I get hit by a tennis ball"

Bonnie quickly leaves.

"Try not to over think it" Mary repeated.

The Tennis Bot fires at her and Mary hits the tennis ball away.

"Yes!" Mary cheered.

Meanwhile the Sisters and Reality TV Pros are now sharing the same basket.

"Well it's nice that we're still alive" Emma said. "It's too bad that now we're in a tie for last"

"Could you be more negative?" Kitty asked angrily.

"Yeah she could" Noah said. "She implied that we'd finish. We only have one squeegee and one bucket of water"

"Guys I know how we can finish it" Owen said. "But we have to agree to an alliance"

"Sure" Noah said.

"Okay" Emma said.

"Yes!" Kitty cheered.

"So what exactly is your plan?" Noah asked Owen.

"I will be the squeegee!" Owen announced.

Owen takes off his shirt and dumps the bucket of water over him.

"Oh dear God..." Emma said.

Owen presses up against the window.

"Let it drop" Owen said.

Noah and Kitty push the levers and the window washing basket starts dropping down.

Back on the tennis court the other teams hear the noise Owen is making.

"Hey do you hear that?" Jen asked.

"It's getting louder" Tom said.

"Do you think we should check it out?" Jen asked.

"I really think that we don't want to know" Tom said.

"Good idea..." Jen said.

Cut back to the Sisters and Reality TV Pros sliding down the windows. They pass the other teams and crash into the ground.

"I feel like I just took a roller coaster through a car wash" Owen said.

Emma runs over to the nearby Don Box and takes the travel tip.

"It says we have to race to the Gold Souk" Emma read. "The what?"

Cut to Don standing in front of the Gold Souk.

"The Gold Souk: Just a normal plaza... Where everything is made out of gold" Don explained. "To reach the Chill Zone inside one of the stores the teams must travel inside taxis. Some of which are made out of gold... Wow, they really like their gold here"

Back on the tennis court Carrie is getting ready to go next.

"You can do it" Devin said. "Just ask yourself: What would Shelly do"

"No! I'm not Shelly and I never will be!" Carrie yelled.

Carrie angrily storm off.

"Carrie wait, nobody is" Devin said.

Tracey walks over to Devin.

"Now that she's gone does this mean I'm up" Tracey said.

"Can't talk right now" Devin said.

Devin runs after Carrie.

"I'm taking that as a yes" Tracey said.

Meanwhile Kelly and Taylor have finished cleaning the windows.

"Done..." Kelly said seeming out of breath.

Kelly gets out of the window washing basket.

"Took long enough" Taylor said. "Wait hang on, there's some mud on my boot"

Taylor takes off her boot and rubs the mud off on Kelly's jacket.

"I am not a doormat!" Kelly yelled angrily.

"You were sweaty and gross already" Taylor said. "Why should we both suffer?"

Kelly glares at Taylor. Kelly pulls one of the levers on the basket. The basket lifts up with Taylor in it.

"Mom! Don't just stand there like an old mannequin!" Taylor yelled.

"No! I'm not helping you" Kelly said. "I'm giving you a time out"

"You can't do that" Taylor said. "I'm your daughter"

"Well that's how it works" Kelly said. "I won't help until you apologise"

"Well you're in for a long wait" Taylor said.

Meanwhile in the Gold Souk the Sisters and Reality TV Pros are looking for the Chill Zone.

"Remember everyone, we're looking for a gold Chill Zone" Owen said.

"Owen, everything here is made of gold" Emma said.

Noah notices a shop selling small golden statues of his former boss Chris McLean.

"Hey look, they've even got dollar stores here" Noah said.

Emma breaks out into hysterical laughter.

 **Team Interview**

"I didn't get it" Emma admitted flatly.

 **End Interview**

The Reality TV Pros and Sisters have found the Store the Chill Zone is located in.

"Ladies first" Noah said to Emma and Kitty.

"Well... Um... Wow, I don't know what to say" Emma said.

"How about you get in before I change my mind" Noah said.

"Got it" Emma said.

Emma and Kitty run over to the Chill Zone where Don is waiting for them.

"Emma, Kitty, you have first place!" Don announced.

"Yes!" Emma cheered. "We finally got it!"

"Alright!" Kitty cheered.

Owen and Noah run to the Chill Zone next.

"Second!" Don announced.

 **Team Interview**

"It's not like this was the race for the million" Noah said. "I'm okay with being a little nice"

 **End Interview**

Josee and Jacques make it to over to the Chill Zone after that.

"Welcome to the Chill Zone" Don said. "You've got third"

"Again!?" Josee said angrily.

"I'm just kidding" Don said. "You actually have fourth. Sanders and MacArthur already got here"

Sanders and MacArthur walk over to them.

"Yeah, we took one of the non-gold cabs. Apparently their a lot faster" MacArthur said.

"You mean we aren't even on the podium?!" Josee asked angrily.

"What podium?" Don asked. "There is no podium"

"There's always a podium" Jacques said.

"Um... Okay then" Don said.

"Jacques, I want to break something" Josee said. "Give me something to break"

Mary and Ellody run over to the Chill Zone next.

"Fifth!" Don announced.

Jack and Bonnie are the next ones there.

"Sixth!" Don said.

Dwayne and Junior make it to the Chill Zone next quickly followed by Crimson and Ennui.

"Seventh and Eighth!" Don announced.

"Yay..." Crimson said unenthusiastically.

Geoff and Brody run up to Don next.

"Ninth!" Don said.

"Alright bro!" Brody cheered.

Chet and Lorenzo are the next ones there.

"Tenth!" Don announced.

Melvin and Trevor are the next ones over to the Chill Zone.

"Eleventh!" Don said.

"Yes!" Melvin cheered.

"Now that we aren't so close to the back will you stop trying to be evil?" Trevor asked.

"Um... No" Melvin said.

"Well it was worth a shot" Trevor said.

Rock and Spud make it to the Chill Zone after them.

"Twelfth!" Don said.

"Rock and roll!" Rock cheered.

Elsewhere in the Gold Souk the Fashion Bloggers and Actors are taking their time to find the Chill Zone.

"Wow... There is a lot of gold in here" Tom commented.

"I know" Jen said.

"Hey, you two like fashion right?" Lewis asked.

"Obviously. We have a whole blog on it" Tom said.

"How would you like to go on a shopping spree with us" Tracey said. "We have a bank account in this country"

"Why?" Jen asked.

"We're middle aged actors we do stuff like this" Lewis said. "Last month I bought myself a pet python"

"What?" Tom asked.

"Ignore that" Tracey said. "You two seem to be the most stylish people here. We're egotistical and wealthy celebrities. We should go shopping together"

"Um... We kind of want to not come in last" Tom said.

"Okay, well we'll buy you something nice" Lewis said.

They each go their separate ways.

 **Team Interview**

"Usually we'd jump at any opportunity to go shopping" Tom said.

"But right now we're really excited about making it this far in the race" Jen said.

"We were not expecting to make it past Paris" Tom said.

 **End Interview**

Meanwhile Kelly still hasn't let Taylor down yet.

"Taylor, I am going to show you what your attitude is doing" Kelly said.

"It's called "Tude" mom, get with the times" Taylor said. "You can't even lecture me right"

"I got a tip from the Don Box. Our next destination is a mall full of gold. We could be shopping right now" Kelly said melodramatically.

"I- I didn't know" Taylor said. "I'm sorry, I'm like, so sorry"

"You really mean it?" Kelly asked.

"Not for anything I said" Taylor said. "Look, you're kind of lame and most of the time you totally embarrass me. But, as long as you take me shopping I think we can get along"

"That's all I wanted to hear" Kelly said.

Back on the tennis court Carrie is preparing to face off against the tennis bot once again.

"I can do this" Carrie said to herself. "Just don't think about Shelly"

The Tennis Bot shoots a tennis ball at her. She hits the ball and the tennis ball ends up hitting the Tennis Bot.

"Finally!" Carrie cheered. "Let's go Devin"

Cut to Carrie and Devin talking inside their taxi on their way to the Gold Souk.

"I'll feel bad if we lost on account of my bad tennis skills" Carrie said.

"It's okay. We'll be best friends whether or not we win" Devin said. "Plus I'll get Shelly's tennis instructor to give you a few tips"

Over at the Chill Zone Don is waiting for the teams.

"I really wonder how they got all they gold to begin with" Don commented.

Tom and Jen run over to Don.

"Thirteenth!" Don announced.

Carrie and Devin are the next ones to make it to Chill Zone.

"Carrie, Devin, you are in last" Don said.

"Really?" Carrie asked.

"I'm just kidding you" Don said. "There are still two team unaccounted for right now"

"Where are they?" Devin asked.

"Don't know" Don said.

Meanwhile Lewis and Tracey are in clothing shop.

"Hey Tracey, do I need a diamond studded leather coat?" Lewis asked.

"Why not" Tracey said. "I like spending money"

"Me too. It makes me feel important" Lewis said.

Someone taps on Lewis' shoulder. Lewis turns around to see Kelly and Taylor.

"Excuse me do you know where the washrooms are in here?" Kelly asked.

"I don't work here" Lewis said. "Wait weren't you two really far behind?"

"Yeah so?" Taylor asked.

"That would mean that we are the last two teams that haven't finished yet" Tracey said.

"So we should start racing" Taylor said.

"Well, in the name a chivalry I would say ladies first" Lewis said. "But, in the name of greed I will say actors first"

The Actors and Mom & Daughter drop their shopping goods and start running towards the Chill Zone. Lewis and Tracey make it there first.

"Fifteenth!" Don announced.

Kelly and Taylor are the last ones there.

"Kelly, Taylor, you are out of the race" Don said.

"I guess we should have checked in before going shopping" Kelly said.

"Meh, we still had fun" Taylor said.

Clips of them competing play while they narrate over them.

"I hope to never see another camel again but Hawaii and Paris were fun" Kelly narrated over a clip of her carrying Taylor over hot coals in Hawaii.

"I can't believe your upper body strength. You need to see your trainer. For reals" Taylor said over a clip of them swinging across the ravine in Brazil.

"You know it's funny, we entered hoping to win more money but we got something we actually needed" Kelly said over a clip of Taylor being headbutted by a goat on the plane from Iceland.

"Speaking of which if we're gonna shop more you're going to need to double my allowance" Taylor said as the footage switched to them getting in a cab.

"Oh Taylor, I'm cancelling your allowance" Kelly said.

"Wait, what?" Taylor said.

* * *

 **Like with the last chapter I've decided to downplay Noah and Emma's "In Love-ness" because as I said before it was kind of creepy in canon. As for the elimination I've decided to leave it the same. I didn't see much of a reason to change it. Please be sure to give me suggestions and constructive criticism.**


	10. New Beijinging

"Last time on the Ridonculous Race! We struck gold in Dubai. Carrie gave up on the game of love. Bonnie was finally convinced that she actually wasn't as nice as she thought and managed to help out the Geniuses. And Kelly finally gave Taylor a time out. Which narrowly cost them the race. But hey, a healthy relation ship as a daughter is more important than a million dollars... But since I don't have kids I'd choose the money. And last but not least an alliance was formed between the Sisters and Reality TV Pros. Is it more than just that? Your guess is as good as mine. But mine matters more because I'm famous. This is: The Ridonculous Race!"

Don is standing next to a Don Box in Dubai.

"Welcome back" Don said. "Sisters Emma and Kitty will be receiving the first travel tip"

Emma and Kitty go up to the Don Box and take the travel tip.

"It says to find the next travel tip in the world famous Birds Nest Stadium" Kitty read. "Never heard of it"

Cut to a background of the Chinese flag with a photo of the Birds Nest Stadium to accompany it.

"Well it's right here in Beijing China" Don narrated. "Home to twenty five million people. And oddly enough we won't see many of them"

Cut to a plane in the air.

"Flight one is already close to landing in Beijing" Don narrated. "The stragglers on flight two have an extra hour to talk strategy. Don't worry we'll edit the boring parts out"

Inside the plane Devin is asleep. Carrie is watching him.

"Watching Devin sleep is so awesome" Carrie said. "He sometimes mumbles the sweetest things"

"Rainbow zebras took my wallet..." Devin mumbled.

"I said sometimes" Carrie said.

Rock is walking down the aisle when he notices that there's an open bag of peanuts next to Devin.

"Hey, Carrie, you gonna make a move on that?" Rock asked.

"Oh, well Devin and I are friends" Carrie said thinking he was talking about Devin.

"I know but this opportunity isn't gonna last forever" Rock said.

Rock starts to reach for the peanuts but Carrie grabs his arm and stops him.

"That's what I keep thinking" Carrie said. "The whole reason we entered this race was to show him we had a connection. You know, something special"

Cut to Rock standing in the middle of the aisle and talking to the camera.

"I just wanted that bag of peanuts" Rock said in frustration.

Cut back to Carrie and Devin. Devin suddenly wakes up.

"Oh good you're okay" Devin said. "I had a dream we lived in a tree house and it caught fire-"

"Just you and me?" Carrie asked.

"Well I was a three headed tiger and you were a gorilla in a tuxedo but it was us" Devin said. "Crazy isn't it"

Devin goes back to sleep.

The camera pans to Rock and Spud.

"Spud, I know how our strategy is slow and steady but we might need to rethink it" Rock said.

"Isn't our strategy to party on!" Spud said excietedly.

"No that's not right" Rock said. "Let's think of a new strategy"

"How about... Party on harder!" Spud said.

"Spud we like gotta go faster" Rock said.

"Oh... I'll tell the pilot" Spud said.

Spud gets up and runs down the aisle. Rock facepalms.

The camera pans over to Dwayne and Junior.

"We could have been on the first flight but somebody had to go potty at the airport" Dwayne said. "And that someone hasn't been eating their vegetables so-"

"Dad! Stop making it sound like it was me" Junior said. "It was you"

Cut to Beijing where the flight one teams are inside a shuttle.

"Flight one has landed and the teams are already on their way to the next Don Box via shuttle" Don narrated.

Inside the bus the Reality TV Pros and Sisters are talking.

"Thanks for letting us take the win yesterday" Kitty said.

"No problem" Owen said.

"Just don't expect us to return the favour" Emma said. "We're in an alliance but this is still a competition"

 **Team Interview**

"Yep, she's awesome" Noah said.

"Emma and Noah sitting in a tree" Owen mocked.

Noah punches him in the stomach.

"Ow!" Owen exclaimed.

 **Second Interview**

"You like Noah, admit it" Kitty said.

"I do not" Emma said.

"So then you think he's weird looking?" Kitty asked.

"He's not weird looking" Emma defended.

"So do you think he's boring?" Kitty asked.

"Noah is not boring" Emma said. "I appriciate his sense of humour"

 **End Interview**

The shuttle stops and crashes into the Don Box. The Don Box flies threw the air, smashes into the ground and starts spitting out travel tips. The teams get out of the shuttle and grab travel tips.

"Fly over the Birds Nest Stadium and tandem jump through the Doughnut Hole to receive your next travel tip" Emma read.

"Ooh doughnuts!" Owen said excitedly.

Cut to later where the flight one teams are inside a biplane flying over the Birds Nest Stadium.

"That's the doughnut... How disappointing" Owen said

 **Team Interview**

"When's there gonna be another eating challenge?" Owen asked. "I'm so hungry I could eat a doughnut house. With chocolate shingles and a pretzel fence"

"This is my life everyday" Noah said.

 **End Interview**

Josee takes out her lucky lava rock and kisses it.

"I need all the luck this Hawaiian lava rock can bring me" Josee said. "Nothing will stand in my way"

The door on the plane opens.

"Ready to jump?" Emma asked Noah.

"How hard could it be?" Noah asked.

The Reality TV Pros and Sisters jump out of the plane. Owen and Noah crash into a rickshaw and Emma and Kitty crash into a gong.

Back on the plane the Police Cadets, Stepbrothers, Surfer Dudes, Ice Dancers, and Goths jump out of the plane. Josee and Jacques are blow away by the wind.

"Go the other way!" Josee yelled.

"I know that!" Jacques said.

They crash into a billboard.

Back on the biplane the Geniuses and Cousins are the oly flight one teams not to jump yet..

"Okay, we need to figure out how high in the air we are right now" Mary said. "The recomended hight for flying in a plane like this is-"

Mary is cut off by Bonnie pushing her and Ellody out the plane.

"That wasn't very nice" Jack said.

"I don't have a morality" Bonnie said. "You've known be for years. You should know this"

Bonnie and Jack jump out the plane.

Back on the ground the Sisters and Reality TV Pros are getting back up after crashing.

"Okay, this time less screaming more steering" Emma said.

"I'll see what I can do but no guarantees" Kitty said.

The bus with the flight two teams arrives and the get off. Rock is the last one off the bus until he realizes that Spud isn't with him.

"Spud! Hey Spud! Want a Choco-Oink?" Rock asked.

Rock holds out a box with a picture of a pig on it. Spud jumps out of the bus.

 **Team Interview**

"New strategy, Spud loves Choco-Oinks. He'd do anything for one" Rock said.

"Chocolate covered pork rindey goodness..." Spud said.

"So I cleared out the airport vending machine" Rock said.

Rock takes an Oinkie out of the box and holds it out. Spud bites Rocks entire hand.

"AH" Rock yelled.

 **End Interview**

The flight one teams, minus the Ice Dancers, Sisters, and Reality TV Pros, find the next Don Box.

"Sweet, it's an All-In" Geoff read.

Cut to Don standing next to a bunch of crates and and elderly Chinese woman.

"An All-In with a twist" Don said. "To receive their next tip from this vendor one team member must assemble and deep fry a skewer of Beijing street food. And their partner has to eat it"

Geoff and Brody are the first ones over to the vendor.

"So what's good today lady dude?" Brody said. "Are the crickets fresh?"

The old woman holds up a live cricket.

"That was a joke" Brody said.

Crimson and Ennui run over to one crate and open it. A bunch of bats fly out.

 **Team Interview**

"Bats are the most beautiful creatures on earth. I had to set them free" Crimson said.

"They're like angels of death" Ennui said.

"How poetic" Crimson said.

 **End Iterview**

Meanwhile back in the stadium Josee and Jacques are coming in for a second landing. When they hit the ground Jacques accidentally twists his foot in a weird way.

"Gah! My ankle!" Jacques yelled.

Cut to Josee talking to the camera with Jacques jumping around in pain in the background.

"Why is Jacques so clumsy today?" Josee complained. "Don't give him sympathy it'll only encourage him"

Cut back to Josee and Jacques running towards the Don Box. Jacques is trailing behind.

"Josee, slow down. The pain is very intense" Jacques said.

"Snap out of it! Our fans are watching! Eat the pain!" Josee yelled. "And smile!"

"Oh, okay" Jacques said nervously.

They start running again. Carrie and Devin land in the stadium next.

"That was amazing!" Carrie cheered.

"Great..." Devin said nervously.

Devin falls over.

"You okay?" Carrie asked.

"Fine..." Devin said weakly.

 **Team Interview**

"I am not great with heights... Or falling from them. Which I think is reasonable" Devin said. "I'm glad Carrie was there with me. If Shelly was here she would have totally bailed"

"Hey what's that!" Carrie said quickly.

Carrie points off camera. Devin looks in that direction. Carrie smiles at the camera and gives the thumbs up.

 **End Interview**

The Sisters and Reality TV Pros are landing in the stadium.

"So do you like movies?" Noah asked.

Before Emma can answer they land and Owen accidentally ends up falling on top of Noah.

 **Team** **Interview**

"I didn't mean to cut you off I swear" Owen said.

"Well now I don't know if she likes movies" Noah said.

"Of course she likes movies" Owen said.

"Oh yeah... That does make sense" Noah said.

 **End Interview**

Back by the food stand Crimson is preparing to eat her skewer. She takes a small bite of it.

"How's it taste?" Ennui asked.

"A little bland..." Crimson said.

The camera pans over to MacArthur poking a crate.

"Careful you don't know what's in there" Sanders said.

"I know exactly what I'm doing" MacArthur said.

"You say that all the time" Sanders said.

MacArhur opens the crate and a cobra coils around her neck.

"Ah! Get it off!" MacArthur yelled.

The camera pans over to Mary opening a box of spiders.

"Now correct me if I'm wrong, but these will only attack you if you attack first" Mary said.

"No that breed of spiders will attack anything that it doesn't like" Ellody said.

Several spiders shoots webs at Mary and pull her inside the box.

"Which apparently includes you" Ellody said.

Carrie and Devin are the next ones to arrive there.

"Um... I'm not sure I'll be able to... Stomach any of this" Carrie said.

"It's okay, I'll eat it" Devin said. "You just skewer up some worms and-"

Carrie suddenly runs off camera and throws up.

Cut to Carrie and Devin are talking to the camera with the other teams cooking in the background. Carrie now looks very pale and is holding a bucket. Devin has his hands over her ears.

"When we were kids her sister dared her to eat a worm" Devin explained. "She did it and then she spent the next six hours throwing up"

"Were you talking about worms?" Carrie asked.

"Yes..." Devin said awkwardly.

Carrie throws up in her bucket.

"Yeah I walked into that one..." Devin said.

Cut to Dwayne trying to skewer a scorpion out of a crate.

"Come here you sneaky little rascal" Dwayne said. "Maybe I should just use my hand"

Dwayne starts to reach into the crate but the vendor grabs Dwayne's hand and pulls his hand away.

"Now don't you worry about me" Dwayne said. "I know what I'm doing"

Dwayne reaches into the crate and a bunch of scorpions sting his hand.

"Ow!" Dwayne exclaimed. "Make the pain stop!"

Meanwhile back at the stadium Rock and Spud are the last ones to get to the Don Box.

"We did it!" Spud said excitedly. "Oink me!"

"Not until after we're out of last" Rock said.

"Aw, come on" Spud said.

"Fine just one" Rock said

Rock takes a Choco-Oinkie out of the box and throw it across the stadium. Spud runs after it.

 **Team Interview**

"My mom said I'm a light eater" Spud said. "When the lights go on, I start eating"

 **End Interview**

Back by the food stand more teams are getting ready. Lewis is trying to skewer a scorpion.

"Why are they moving so much" Lewis complained. "These are nothing like the trained ones I acted with"

"Wait there's such thing as trained scorpions?" Tracey asked.

"Well most of them were either rubber or dead but there are a few" Lewis said.

One scorpion climbs up the skewer and on to his arm.

"Ah!" Lewis yelled. "Get it off"

"Don't move a muscle" Tracey said.

Tracey takes a different skewer and stabs the scorpion with it.

"My arm!" Lewis yelled.

"At least you aren't poisoned" Tracey said.

The camera pans over to Bonnie frying her skewer for Jack.

"Why are you so calm?" Jack asked. "That stuff you're cooking looks terrible"

"Easy, I am a very apathetic person and don't care whether or not you like this" Bonnie said.

"Sometimes you scare me Bonnie" Jack said.

"I get that a lot" Bonnie said.

The camera pans to Dwayne walking around in a daze with Junior following him. Dwane has red bumps on his hand and his eyes are pointing in opposite directions.

"Dad are you okay?" Junior asked.

"Of course I am Mr. President" Dwayne said. "Are you?"

Dwayne falls over.

"Great..." Junior said flatly.

Cut to Junior talking to the camera with Dwayne walking around in the background.

"The medic says it'll wear off eventually" Junior said. "But until then I'm in charge of the team... Again"

Cut to Melvin getting ready to eat his skewer.

"Do I have to eat this?" Melvin asked. "Maybe you should"

"I can't" Trevor said. "I'm the one who had to cook it. Plus it still can't be as bad as the stuff in Iceland. At least this stuff is hot"

"That's true" Melvin said.

Melvin takes a bite of some of the meat.

"Nope... It's somehow worse" Melvin said.

The camera Josee finishing up frying her skewer.

"Are you ready Jacques?" Josee asked.

"No" Jacques said.

"I don't care" Josee said

Josee shoves the food on the skewer into his mouth.

"How's it taste?" Josee asked.

"I could barely taste anything" Jacques said. "You made me eat it so fast"

"Good" Josee said. "Now we're in first"

The elderly woman walks over to them and hands them their travel tip.

"It's a Botch or Watch" Josee read. "Whoever didn't dive for rings in Hawaii must-"

Cut to Don sitting in a rickshaw.

"Must pull their partner on a rickshaw to the Great Wall of the China using only the map included in their rickshaw" Don explained. "Last team to find the Chill Zone somewhere along the wall could be going home"

Cut back to Josee and Jacques leaving on their rickshaw. Sanders and MacArthur make it over to their rickshaw.

"Let's go Sanders" MacArthur said. "I want to catch up to those ice freaks"

"Got it" Sanders said.

They leave. Geoff and Brody run over there next.

"Let's get going dude" Geoff said.

"You got it bro" Brody said.

Geoff and Brody leave.

Melvin and Trevor run over to the rickshaws.

"Let's move Trevor. I want the others to know the evil that is Melvin" Melvin said.

"I've just learned to ignore you by now" Trevor said.

The camera pans over to Carrie and Devin.

"Four teams have already moved on" Devin said. "Carrie you need to start skewering if-"

Carrie runs off screen and throws up.

"Okay..." Devin said awkwardly.

The Sisters and Reality TV Pros make it over to the food stand.

"I prep you eat. Got it?" Emma said.

"Is that a question?" Kitty asked.

"No" Emma said.

"You prep I eat. Not a question. Go!" Noah said to Owen.

"Wow" Emma said.

 **Team Interview**

"I figure if I act like Emma it'll make her like me more" Noah said. "I've got this so figured out"

 **End Interview**

"What's wrong with you" Emma said. "Could you be meaner to your partner"

 **Team Interview**

"Why is this so hard?" Noah asked.

"It's very simple" Owen said. "You need to be really subtle"

 **End Interview**

Owen and Emma are preparing to fry their skewers.

"Psst, Noah likes you" Owen said quietly.

"I don't care" Emma said.

 **Team Interview**

"Why did you say that?" Kitty asked.

"I don't know" Emma said.

 **End Interview**

Carrie is trying to skewer a snake when she realizes it's positioned in the shape of a heart.

"Aw... Look Devin, it must be a sign" Carrie said.

The snake suddenly bites Devin's face.

The camera pans over to Tom handing Jen a skewer.

"Tom, do I have to eat this?" Jen asked.

"It's either that or go home" Tom said.

"Um... Let me think about it..." Jen said nervously.

"For serious?" Tom asked.

"No, I'll eat it" Jen said.

"Just tell yourself it's for the blog" Tom said.

"I'm not sure how much that will help" Jen said.

The camera pans over to Spud trying to skewer a starfish.

"Whoa... If I had that many arms I could play drums, guitar, and keyboard at the same time" Spud said.

"Please hurry up" Rock siad.

"Maybe a Choco-Oink would help me pick up the pace?" Spud suggested.

"One of these" Rock said.

Rock takes an Oinkie out of the box.

"Yeah" Spud said.

Rock crushes the Oinkie in his hand and drops the crumbs on the ground. Spud starts to lick the crumbs up.

"This is getting sad" Rock said.

Meanwhile Josee and Jacques are running towards the great wall.

"First place here we come!" Jacques cheered.

"We are goddesses!" Josee cheered.

"I'm a guy" Jacques said.

"It doesn't matter" Josee said.

Melvin and Trevor start to catch up with them in their rickshaw.

"Hi, I'm Melvin" Melvin said. "You don't know me and my partner Trevor. Mostly because we've been really behind. But now we're gonna be in first!"

Melvin leans in and pushes Josee over. This causes Jacques and Josee's rickshaw to crash.

"Ha! I finally succeeded in being evil!" Melvin cheered.

"High five" Trevor said.

"Wait! No high five!" Melvin said.

Trevor takes his hand off the rickshaw to high five Melvin and they crash. The left wheel breaks off.

"Now look what you did" Melvin said.

"Crap..." Trevor said.

 **Team Interview**

"I don't get it" Melvin said. "I finally did something bad enough to be deemed evil and then something bad happens to us. That's the whole reason I started doing this. So bad things wouldn't happen"

"Well that's karma for you" Trevor said.

"Don't be silly Trevor" Melvin said. "Karma is just one of those stupid things that hippies made up. Like meditation or global warming"

"Um... What?" Trevor said awkwardly.

 **End Interview**

Owen and Emma finish cooking their skewers and hand them off to their partners. Kitty takes a bite of it.

"This is pretty good" Kitty commented.

Noah takes a bite of his.

"Ooh, thith ith hot" Noah said with his mouth full.

"I know this is a race but you don't have to be gross" Emma said.

"Thorry" Noah said.

Noah accidentally spits food in Emma's face.

"I'm gonna go now" Emma said.

Meanwhile the Cousins and Geniuses are going down the road on their rickshaws.

"Jack! Which way do I go?" Bonnie asked.

"I don't know, this map is written in Korean" Jack said.

"We're in China not Korea" Bonnie said.

"I still can't read it" Jack said.

"Let me take a look" Ellody said.

Jack passes the map to her. Ellody takes out a pen and draws some numbers and symbols on it. Ellody gives it back.

"This is somehow more confusing" Jack said.

"It's very simple" Mary said.

"You say that about everything" Bonnie said. "I'm not even exaggerating"

"We can't help it if we have high IQ's" Mary said.

"We're still lost" Bonnie said.

Meanwhile the Surfer Dudes and Police Cadets are the first teams to the Great Wall of China.

"Which way do we go?" Sanders asked.

"We should split up" Geoff said.

"I'll go with MacArthur" Brody said.

"No I meant one team goes right and the other goes left" Geoff said.

"Oh... That makes more sense" Brody said.

 **Team Interview**

"It's not my fault Brody wants to hang out with me" MacArthur said. "Doctors say my pheromones are as strong as a tank built by grizzly bears"

"That makes zero sense" Sanders said.

"Oh, because you're suddenly a bear expert" MacArthur said.

"They don't have opposable thumbs. They wouldn't be able to build a- Why am I having this conversation?" Sanders said.

 **End Interview**

Josee and Jacques make it to the Great Wall.

"Which way do we go?" Josee asked.

"I don't know" Jacques said. "Our map is useless!"

Josee takes out her lava rock and rubs it on the map.

"I'll let luck decide!" Josee declared.

Josee tosses the map into the air and it starts to blow away in the wind. They chase after it.

Back at the food stand Chet finishes eating.

"Took you long enough" Lorenzo said.

"Shut up!" Chet said. "It's not my fault I hate disgusting food"

The elderly woman hands Chet the travel tip.

"Ha! Now you have to pull a rickshaw!" Lorenzo said.

The camera pans over to Tracey finishing her skewer.

"Done!" Tracey announced.

"Good, let's go" Lewis said. "Also can we get a medic to look at my arm? I think you might have punctured the skin earlier"

"You're fine, let's go" Tracey said.

The camera pans over to Junior finishing up eating his skewer.

"Dad, I'm done" Junior said.

"That's great Quincy" Dwayne said.

"Not even gonna question it" Junior said.

The camera pans over to Devin handing Carrie a skewer.

"Just keep telling yourself that you're eating chicken" Devin said.

"But it isn't chicken" Carrie said.

"Doesn't matter" Devin said. "Just keep telling yourself that it is"

"Okay... It's chicken" Carrie said. "It's chicken"

Carrie takes a bite of the skewer.

"Hey it actually does taste like chicken" Carrie said.

The camera pans to Spud handing the skewer off to Rock.

"Can I have a Choco-Oink?" Spud asked.

"No!" Rock said.

Rock takes a look at the skewer.

"This isn't gonna go well..." Rock said.

Cut to Emma and Kitty running down the road.

"You like Noah" Kitty said. "Why do you keep shooting him down?"

"Because it's a competition" Emma said. "I'm here to win!"

Their rickshaw runs over a rock and one of their wheels breaks off. Owen and Noah accidentally run over their wheel and destroy it.

"No! Our wheel!" Emma yelled. "Now we're gonna get eliminated"

Noah and Owen stop next to them.

"Need any help?" Owen asked.

"What do you think?" Emma asked sarcastically.

"Got it" Noah said.

Meanwhile Melvin and Trevor are trying to reattach their wheel to their rickshaw.

"This is taking too long" Melvin said.

"Have you ever tried to fix a rickshaw?" Trevor asked.

"I've never heard of a rickshaw before today" Melvin said.

"Really?" Trevor asked.

"Yes really" Melvin said. "Stop changing the subject"

"Mel, I'm starting to think fixing this thing is a lost cause" Trevor said.

"What do you want to do? Just go with one wheel" Melvin said. "We'd be so slow"

"It's either be slow or not move at all" Trevor said.

"Fine, but let's hurry" Melvin said.

Up along the road the Sisters and Reality TV Pros are racing side by side. Noah is leaning over and keeping the Sisters' rickshaw stable.

"Are we moving too fast?" Emma asked.

"No it's good" Noah said.

"Doesn't that hurt?" Kitty asked.

"Oh yes, I-I'm in tremendous pain" Noah said. "But your sister is really pretty and that sort of distracts from it"

Meanwhile at the Chill Zone Don is waiting for the teams.

"Hmm... I wonder why they built this wall in the first place" Don commented.

Sanders and MacArthur are the first ones to the Chill Zone.

"Sanders, MacArthur, you are in first" Don said.

"Nailed it!" MacArthur said.

Geoff and Brody run over to the Chill Zone next.

"Second!" Don announced.

"Nice going dude" Geoff said.

"Yeah!" Brody cheered.

Elsewhere along the wall Josee and Jacques are running.

"Are we getting closer yet?" Jacques asked.

"I can feel it!" Josee said.

They notice the Sisters and Reality TV Pros running towards them.

"Wait... If they're coming towards us... We're going the wrong way!" Josee realized.

Josee and Jacques turn around and start running the other way.

Meanwhile Rock and Spud are getting ready to get in their rickshaw.

"Okay, we're ready to go" Rock said. "Where are my Choco-Oinks?"

Rock turns around and sees that Spud ate the whole box.

"Did you eat all of them?" Rock asked.

"Yeah!" Spud cheered.

"I have a bad feeling about this..." Rock said nervously.

"Are we gonna waste this sugar high or are we gonna ride it?!" Spud asked excitedly.

Spuds eye twitches. Spud starts pulling the rickshaw without Rock.

"Wait! I'm supposed to pull!" Rock called to Spud.

"CHOCO-OINK!" Spud yelled.

Meanwhile Tom is pulling Jen in the rickshaw.

"Jen, can I take a break?" Tom asked.

"Sure, how about a five minute break" Jen said.

"Thanks" Tom said.

Tom stops.

"My legs are tired" Tom said.

Lewis and Tracey pass them,

"Hi again" Lewis said.

"Changed my mind. Start running again" Jen said.

"Good idea" Tom said.

Tom starts running again.

Meanwhile at the Chill Zone Owen and Noah make it there next.

"Third!" Don announced.

Emma and Kitty run over to Don after them.

"Fourth!" Don announced.

Josee and Jacques make it there next.

"Fifth!" Don announced.

"Fifth... Fifth!" Josee said angrily. "That's even worse than fourth! It's like a tin medal! I hate tin!"

"Josee, calm down" Jacques said.

"I am calm!" Josee said angrily.

Meanwhile Dwayne is pulling Junior.

"Santa, have we delivered the presents yet?" Dwayne asked.

"Just keep running" Junior said.

The camera pans to Devin pulling Carrie. Carrie looks very sick again.

"That was not chicken..." Carrie said weakly.

Rock and Spud run past them.

"I LOVE CHOCO-OINKS!" Spud shouted.

Back at the Chill Zone Chet and Lorenzo make it there.

"Sixth!" Don announced.

Crimson and Ennui make it to the Chill Zone next.

"Seventh!" Don said.

Tom and Jen are the next ones to the Chill Zone.

"Eighth!" Don announced.

Lewis and Tracey are there after them

"Ninth!" Don said.

Bonnie and Jack are the next ones there quickly followed by Mary and Ellody.

"Tenth and Eleventh!" Don said.

Carrie and Devin run over to don next.

"Twelfth!" Don announced.

The Rockers and Father & Son are racing towards the Chill Zone. Rock and Spud are in the lead.

"Hurry dad!" Junior said.

"What's that Mr. McKenzie?" Dwayne said.

"Whoa... Sugar crash..." Spud said.

Spud falls over and Dwayne and Junior outrun him and Rock.

"Thirteenth!" Don announced.

Rock drags Spud over to the Chill Zone.

"Rockers, you're in fourteenth!" Don said.

"Sweet!" Rock said.

"Or rather you would be if you didn't get a twenty minute penalty" Don said. "Rock was supposed to pull the rickshaw"

"Aw... Bummer" Spud said.

"If the time runs out before the Magicians get here you get fourteenth" Don said. "If they get here before time runs out you may be eliminated"

Meanwhile Melvin and Trevor are walking down the Great Wall.

"Mel, I think we're going the wrong way" Trevor said.

"We aren't" Melvin said.

"We totally are" Trevor said.

"Trevor! We are not going the wrong way!" Melvin said angrily.

"If we keep going this way we'll walk right into the ocean" Trevor said.

"We aren't going to fall into the ocean!" Melvin said. "Honestly, it's times like these I wish I still had hair"

"Why?" Trevor asked.

"So I could rip it out!" Melvin yelled. "You know what... I'm sorry... I just needed to get those emotions out... Let's turn around and see if the Chill Zone is over there"

"Great" Trevor said.

"But if we fall into the ocean it's your fault" Melvin said.

Back at the Chill Zone Rock and Spud are waiting for their penalty to end.

"Sorry I blew it for us" Spud said. "We'll probably be going home"

"No man, it's my fault we have this penalty" Rock said. "If I'm gonna use treats to train you like a dog I can't be surprised when you go nuts, and trash my kitchen, and poop in my shoes"

"I promise to never do that last part" Spud said.

Melvin and Trevor start running towards the Chill Zone.

"My legs hurt!" Trevor said.

"Just keep running!" Melvin said.

"Rock, Spud, your penalty is up!" Don said. "You get fourteenth!"

Rock and Spud step over to the Chill Zone.

"Sweet!" Rock said.

Melvin and Trevor run over to the Chill Zone.

"Melvin, Trevor, you are in last" Don said.

"No!" Trevor said.

"I want to punch you in your perfect face" Melvin said.

"Thank you. I like my face too" Don said. "But I'm here to inform you that this is a non-elimination round!"

"Yes!" Trevor cheered.

"I want to kiss your perfect face!" Melvin said.

"Please don't" Don said. "Your lips look very chapped"

"Got it" Melvin said.

Don turns to the camera.

"Today may be a non-elimination but tomorrow won't" Don said. "Who will go? Probably those two. But tune in next time to find out. In the next episode of: The Ridonculous Race!"

* * *

 **So you probably want to know why Melvin and Trevor came in last instead of Rock and Spud. It'll make sense in the next chapter. Hopefully. Also, I have a small announcement for this story. In the next chapter there will be a previously eliminated team returning. I won't tell you who it will be right now. Anyway, be sure to give me some constructive criticism.**


	11. I Love Ridonc and Roll

"Last time on the Ridonculous Race! Our teams got skewered in China. Sanders and MacArthur got first. Rock got Spud to take some obedience training. But Spud ended up totally crashing. But not as bad Melvin whose terrible antagonising skills got him and Trevor in last. But it was a non-elimination round so the live to fail another day! Fifteen pround teams remain. Time to send one of them packing! This is: The Ridonculous Race!"

Cut to Don standing next to the Don Box on the Great Wall of China.

"Last episodes Chill Zone sits atop the Great Wall of China" Don said. "And last episodes winner are the first to get a tip"

Sanders and MacArthur walk over to the Don Box and take the travel tip.

"Okay, where do we have to go?" MacArthur asked.

"It says we have to fly to Oulu Findland" Sanders asked.

"Is that the country with Ikea?" MacArthur asked.

"Pretty sure that's Sweden" Sanders said. "Or maybe Denmark"

Cut to a background of the Finnish flag with a photo of the mountains there to accompany it.

"Finald: Home to many coffee drinkers, cell phone users, and the most sauna's per capita" Don narrated. "Which is where the teams are heading"

Cut to Don inside of a sauna wearing a towel.

"The teams will go to this spa for their next travel tip" Don explained.

 **Team Interview**

"Finald is is a paradise" Ennui said.

"They have almost four moths of total darkness" Crimson said. "And Goth is mainstream"

Ennui takes out his phone and shows a picture of a heavy metal Goth singer to the camera.

"This guy ran for office" Ennui said. "And won"

 **End Interview**

Rock and Spud are trying to get a cab. Spud took off his shirt and is waving it around for attention.

"Taxi!" Spud yelled.

A taxi stops and they both get in.

 **Team Interview**

"Rock asked me to step up my game on account of how I tank everything" Spud said.

"I was like "Dude" and he was all like "But dude" and I was like "Dude". Or something like that" Rock said.

"That's how I remember it" Spud said.

 **End Interview**

"Take us to the airport" Rock said to the driver.

"Hey! Does anyone want a lift?" Spud called out the door.

The Goths, Police Cadets, and Ice Dancers pile into the cab. The driver starts driving.

"So since we're letting you ride with us does anyone else want an alliance?" Rock asked.

"No" Ennui said.

"Absolutely not" MacArthur said.

"Never in a million years" Josee said.

"Woohoo! Aliiance!" Spud cheered. "Okay team, just so you know: I'm gullible, get distracted easy, and can't say no to a dare"

 **Team Interview**

"Good to know" MacArthur said.

 **End Interview**

Back at the Great Wall Melvin and Trevor receive the last travel tip.

"It says we have to go to Finland" Melvin said.

"That's not so bad" Trevor said.

"Come on let's go" Melvin said.

"Not so fast" Don said. "I have something important to say"

"Can you hurry it up? We have a flight to catch" Melvin said.

"I just wanted to let you know a previously eliminated team is returning" Don said. "They're starting in the back so they don't have an unfair advantage"

"And who exactly may this be?" Trevor asked.

"Laurie and Miles!" Don announced.

Laurie and Miles walk over to them.

"Oh... Hi" Melvin said awkwardly. "You guys aren't mad at me are you?"

"Only on the inside" Laurie said.

"We're able to stay relatively calm most of the time" Miles said.

"But I did briefly consider making a voodoo doll of you at one point" Laurie said. "Luckily for you I went against it"

"Why did you bring them back?" Trevor asked.

"Well your partner Melvin threw their travel tip down a ravine in Brazil which indirectly got them eliminated" Don explained. "After they asked I went to look in to whether or not that was a violation of the rules. Apparently "Destroying or tampering with a travel tip or Don Box " is against the rules. We'd penalize you but since you're already in the back you get a free pass. Now go!"

The Vegans and Magicians start racing.

Cut to a plane landing in Finland.

"All the teams are currently on a flight to Finland" Don narrated. "But thanks to the mighty power of editing they've already arrived"

Cut to Owen and Noah arriving at the Don Box.

"Woo! First ones here!" Owen cheered.

Noah takes the travel tip.

"it says teams have to sit in a dry sauna" Noah read.

"Awesome" Own said.

"Fully clothed at the highest heat for ten minutes" Noah finished.

"Not as awesome" Owen said.

Cut to Don in the Sauna again.

"Each sauna has just enough room for two teams" Don explained. "And the timer doesn't start until both teams are inside"

Cut back to Noah and Owen.

"After that collect the next tip located in the Don Box on the other side of the semi-frozen river" Noah read. "Great..."

"Let's go!" Owen cheered.

Noah grabs Owen.

"Wait. Maybe we should wait for someone like... Emma and Kitty" Noah said.

"Sure... I don't mind" Owen said.

Owen and Noah walk over to one of the saunas.

"Now we wait" Noah said. "At least we still have first"

Rock and Spud run into the sauna.

"First place here we come!" Rock cheered.

"Now we're in second" Owen said.

Crimson and Ennui enter the sauna after the rockers.

"Make that third place" Owen said.

All the other teams, minus the Sisters, run past them and into their own Sauna's.

"Maybe I should just shut up" Owen said.

"Okay seriously. Where are they?" Noah asked.

Emma and Kitty walk up to them.

"Oh hey Emma" Noah said. "It looks like there's only one sauna left and we're the last two teams"

"A sauna together, sound hot" Kitty said.

Kitty nudges Emma's ribs.

Cut to both teams inside the sauna looking very uncomfortable.

"This is not what I meant when I said hot..." Kitty said. "How long have we been here"

"Ten seconds" Emma said flatly.

"So Emma" Noah said. "Do you-"

"Too hot to talk" Emma said.

"Right" Noah said.

"I think we should have just kept our lead" Owen said quietly.

Meanwhile in another sauna Josee and Jacques look very tired out.

"Why are our ice dancing outfits so well insulated?" Jacques asked weakly. "I'm starting to think your lava rock isn't so lucky"

"Not so fast" Josee said. "Our competition in here are both weaklings. The heat will destroy them"

The camera zooms out to reveal Dwayne and Junior sitting next to them.

"You know we can hear you" Dwayne said.

"No I didn't notice actually" Josee said.

"We think we're doing okay" Junior said confidently.

"Actually sport I am really tired out right now" Dwayne said.

Meanwhile the Fashion Bloggers and Actors are in the same sauna.

"I like you two" Lewis said. "You remind me of Tracey and me thirty years ago"

" And in thirty years you'll be me and Lewis" Tracey said.

"Wait I thought you two were in your forties and started acting in your twenties" Jen said. "Thirty years ago you would have been teenagers"

"Which means now you're in your early fifties" Tom said.

"We're actors we lie about our real ages all the time" Tracey said.

"You do it to" Lewis said. "Despite your youthful appearance I can tell you're in your twenties"

"Wow you're good" Jen said.

"Listen the point is we are you in thirties years" Tracey said. "Isn't that amazing?"

"Not too sure that we want that" Tom said.

Meanwhile the Police Cadets and Stepbrothers are sharing a sauna.

"I hate this" Lorenzo said. "It's your fault"

"How is it my fault?" Chet asked.

"I don't know it just is" Lorenzo said.

"How did we get stuck with them?" Sanders asked.

"I really don't know" MacArthur said.

Meanwhile the Geniuses and Cousins are in the same sauna.

"Why am I wearing a sweater?" Bonnie asked.

"Why are you asking me?" Jack asked.

"I just want an answer" Bonnie said. "And for that matter why is there a star on your shirt?"

"Are you okay?" Ellody asked.

"What do you think!" Bonnie said. "I'm wearing a sweater in a sauna!"

"Calm down" Ellody said.

"This is me when I'm calm" Bonnie said.

"You don't sound calm" Jack said.

"You sound very... Tired" Mary said.

"Thank you Mary you are very pretty" Bonnie said. "Now if you excuse me I'm going to pass out from the heat"

Bonnie falls over.

"Is it wrong that I'm glad she finally shut up?" Mary asked.

Meanwhile in another sauna the Best Friends and Surfer Dudes are sharing it.

"Dude... I'm not sure how much longer I can take this" Brody said.

"Don't worry bro" Geoff said. "After this we'll jump into t cold lake to cool off. Just like when we went tanning at the beach and then went diving"

"Hey Carrie is the room starting to get smaller?" Devin asked.

"No, I think the heat is starting to mess with you" Carrie said.

"That explains it" Devin said.

Carrie wipes his forehead.

"Thanks" Devin said.

"Your welcome" Carrie said.

Meanwhile the Vegans and Magicians are sharing the same sauna.

"You know I am really sorry about getting you eliminated" Melvin said. "It sounded like a good idea at the time. Hey is it getting hot in here?"

"It's a sauna" Miles said. "It's supposed to be hot"

"You guys don't hold grudges right?" Trevor asked.

"Only against people who hurt the environment" Laurie said. "And even if we did we'd hate you in silence"

"Well we did eat those bugs in China..." Trevor said.

"What?" Miles asked.

"Nothing!" Melvin said quickly. "Tell you what. I promise to stop being evil if you don't hold a grudge"

"Sounds like a deal" Laurie said.

 **Team Interview**

"I'm glad you decided to drop the villain thing" Trevor said.

"Oh I lied" Melvin said.

"What..." Trevor said.

"What they don't know won't hurt them" Melvin said.

 **End Interview**

Meanwhile the timer in the sauna with the Rockers and Goths is almost done.

"Almost time to jet..." Rock said weakly.

"Aw sweet" Spud said. "Because this heat is getting to me. It looks like those two are melting"

The camera pans over to Crimson and Ennui whose make up is melting off.

"Whoa! Those two are melting!" Rock exclaimed.

Crimson and Ennui look at each other and scream.

The timer in the sauna ends and the Goths quickly run out of the sauna.

Back with the Sisters and Reality TV Pros.

"I am so hot..." Kitty said weakly.

Kitty picks up a bucket of water and pours it over her head.

"That's better" Kitty said. "I didn't know that dry sauna's had water"

"They don't" Noah said. "That was Owen's sweat"

"What?!" Kitty exclaimed.

Kitty screams and runs out of the sauna as soon as the sauna hits zero. While running Kitty accidentally tramples Josee and Jacques on the way.

"Do you mind!" Josee said angrily. "We're on our way to greatness!"

Owen tramples them.

"I hate everyone..." Josee said weakly.

Over by the semi-frozen river Crimson and Ennui make it there first.

"Here we are" Ennui said.

"How do we get across?" Crimson asked.

Kitty suddenly bumps into them and all three of them fall into the river. Kitty swims to the surface of the river.

"I still feel unclean" Kitty said.

Owen jumps in the river. When he rises out of the water he's incased in ice.

"Whoa! That looks really cold" Emma said.

"Come on it can't be that bad" Noah said.

Noah jumps in the river.

"I take it back!" Noah shouted. "Don't get in here. Ride Owen like a boat"

"You sure?" Emma asked.

"He's frozen. I'm sure he's fine" Noah said.

Emma steps on to Owen's head.

On the other side of the river Tracey and Lewis make it there first. Tracey takes the travel tip from the Don Box.

"It says we have to take a cab to down town Oulu" Tracey said.

"Right, let's go" Lewis said.

They leave and then Crimson and Ennui climb out of the water. All their make up has washed off and their wigs have fallen off. They look at each other without make up and scream.

"Your face!" Ennui said.

"Don't look at me" Crimson said.

 **Team Interview**

"We've only been dating for three years" Ennui said. "So naturally we've never seen each other un-Gothed"

"I feel like a dead body that washed up on shore" Crimson said. "And not in a good way"

 **End Interview**

On the shore of the river the Vegans and Magicians are getting ready to cross.

"So do I just jump in?" Trevor asked. "I really don't want to"

"I'll just push you" Melvin said.

"Thanks" Trevor said. "Wait wha-"

Melvin pushes Trevor into the semi-froven river.

"Let's not do that" Miles said.

"Good idea" Laurie said. "Let's try and use the ice to get across"

Laurie and Miles step on to a sheet of ice and it starts to float across the river.

"We're getting back in the game" Laurie said.

"We aren't going to waste our second chance" Miles said.

A small seal swims up to them.

"Oh hello cute little seal" Laurie said.

Laurie tries to pet the seal but it bites her hand.

"Get it off! Laurie exclaimed.

 **Team Interview**

"Laurie, you should really learn by now that not all animals are your friends" Miles said.

"But they're so adorable" Laurie said.

 **End Interview**

The Police Cadets and Rockers are the next ones to make it to the semi-frozen river.

"Here we go" Spud said.

"Hey Spud, I dare you to kiss that seal" MacArthur said.

MacArthur points to the seal that bit Laurie.

"Don't do it" Rock said.

"Double dare" MacArthur said.

 **Team Interview**

"There's a lesson I've learned in life" Spud said. "If something sounds like a bad idea, looks like a bad idea, and requires a dare to do: It's gonna be crazy!"

 **End Interview**

Spud swims over to the seal.

"Hey there little guy" Spud said. "Want a kiss?"

The seal bites Spud's head.

"Killer baby seal... That's a new one" Sanders commented.

Meanwhile in down town Oulu the Sisters, Actors, and Reality TV Pros make it to a concert hall. Emma, Lewis, and Noah take travel tips.

"I wonder who's playing?" Owen asked.

"Apparently we are" Noah said.

"Teams must battle it out in battle of the bands with Finland's national sport air guitar" Emma read. "Air guitar? For real?"

Cut to Don standing a stage. Above Don is a screen with a meter on it.

"For very real" Don said. "Teams performances will be judged by this applause meter"

Don gestures to the meter.

"Get the crowd into a maximum frenzy and the teams can rock on over to the Chill Zone" Don explained. "Get booed off and they're going to the back of the line to try again"

Cut back to the teams.

"Whoever didn't pull the rickshaw in China needs has to perform" Lewis read.

"Uh ho" Noah said.

Later inside the building the teams are preparing to go on stage. Kitty is airguitaring.

"How do I look?" Kitty asked.

"Like a lunatic" Emma said. "But I think that's what we're going for"

The camera pans to Lewis and Tracey. Tracey is nervously pacing back and forth.

"You can do it" Lewis said. "Get out there and don't get distracted by the scary Finnish teenagers"

"I haven't been on stage since the Broadway disaster" Tracey said nervously.

 **Team Interview**

"At the height of my career in 1999 I was in a Broadway musical called Ronald Reagan: A True American Hero" Tracey said.

"On the day of the opening once she stepped on staged she forgot all her lines and just improvised" Lewis said. "It's hilarious now but at the time it was very embarrassing"

"Ever since then I haven't performed in front of a live audience" Tracey said.

 **Second Interview**

"Air guitar: The coolness of not being a musician, the lameness of jumping around like a buffoon" Noah said.

"Yeah, this one had my name written all over it" Owen said.

"Don't worry buddy" Noah said. "I'm gonna channel my inner Owen"

"Woo! Inner me!" Owen cheered.

 **End Interview**

Noah is up on stage. Noah is air guitaring but trips over a power cord and crashes into a stack of speakers. The speakers start to shake.

"Noah! No!" Owen exclaimed.

Owen runs over to Noah to try and stop the speakers but the speakers fall on top of both of them.

"I think I might have broke something" Noah said.

Meanwhile backstage Crimson and Ennui make it there.

"Excuse me this area is for Ridonculous Race teams only" Don said.

"But it's us. I'm Ennui" Ennui said. "This is Crimson"

"That can't be because I'm not remotely creped out" Don said.

"So why do we have a camera crew?" Crimson asked.

"Oh... Seems to check out" Don said.

Elsewhere backstage Owen and Noah get off the stage.

"Well that went horribly" Noah said.

"Hey at least we're still in the top three" Owen said.

They then notice that most of the other teams are there.

"Never mind..." Owen said.

Tracey walks over to Noah.

"Looks like I'm up" Tracey said.

"Watch out for that tree of speakers" Noah warned.

Tracey steps out on stage. When she gets out there she just blankly stares at the auidience.

"I'm gonna go now" Tracey said.

Tracey quickly gets off the stage.

Kitty steps out there next. She starts air guitaring only for tomato to get thrown at her.

"Gah! I hate tomatoes!" Kitty exclaimed.

Kitty gets off stage.

MacArthur steps up to the stage next. She tries to do a slide only to fall on her face. The audience throws tomatoes at her.

"Hey! I'm a cop and can have you arrested" MarAcrthur threatened.

MacArthur leaves the stage.

Junior gets up on stage after her. Junior tries to air guitar only to trip over a power cord and have tomatoes thrown at him.

"Where are you people getting these?" Junior asked.

Junior gets off stage to avoid more tomatoes.

Miles gets on the stage next.

"Um... Wait how exactly am I supposed to do this?" Miles pondered. "I really should have thought this through..."

The audience throws tomatoes at her.

"Nice try! I'm a vegan. I eat these every day" Miles said.

The audience throws dead fish at her.

"Ah! Get it away!" Miles exclaimed.

Miles runs off stage.

Jacques gets on stage next. He does a twirl only to step on a power cord and get electrocuted.

"Why is that up here!? There are no instruments to plug in!" Jacques yelled.

Jacques gets off the stage.

Ennui steps on to the stage next.

"Get off the stage preppy!" One auidience member shouted.

Meanwhile backstage Carrie and Devin are talking to Crimson.

"Crimson? Is that you?" Devin asked. "Your skin is so flesh coloured"

"I love your hair" Carrie said. "It makes you look great"

"You're throwing a lot of positive emotions my way and I don't know what to do with them" Crimson said.

Ennui walk over to her.

"Crimson, this is what the world is for us now" Ennui said. "There's only one thing to do"

 **Team Interview**

"We're quitting" Ennui explained.

 **End Interview**

Back on stage Tracey is up again.

"Ronald Reagan isn't here... Just keep telling yourself that..." Tracey said. "Ronald Reagan isn't here... Just some very scary teenagers... I can do this"

Tracey passes out.

"Will anybody pass this challenge?" Don asked via voice over. "Seriously, this is just pathetic"

Meanwhile backstage Rock and Spud are the last ones back stage. Spud looks beat up from the seal attack.

"Have we lost yet?" Rock asked.

"No but I haven't faith" Josee said.

"Well this challenge is air guitar so I've got this covered" Rock said.

"Actually you don't" Junior said. "You were supposed to pull the rickshaw in China so it's your partners turn"

"But he needs to recover from seal venom or whatever" Rock said.

"Rules are rules" Josee said.

Spud walks out on to stage and just stares at the audience. The crowd boos him.

"Spud! You are on stage!" Rock shouted.

"What... I'm on stage!" Spud said. "Alright!"

Spud start air guitaring and the crowd starts cheering. The applause meter hits maximum.

"Yeah!" Rock cheered.

Rock and Spud run over to the Chill Zone.

"And so the Rockers are in first place!" Don announced. "There isn't a person in Finland who isn't happy right now"

Meanwhile Crimson and Ennui are in a taxi together on their way to the airport.

"I wish I didn't have to end this way" Crimson said.

"Maybe it doesn't" Ennui said. "Maybe we should except each other the way really are"

Crimson and Ennui look into each others eyes.

"Oh my God look at that!" Ennui said.

Ennui points out the window towards a shop that sells Goth gear.

"Driver stop the car" Crimson said.

Meanwhile back on the stage MacArthur is air guitaring a lot better than before.

"With the Rockers' example fresh in mind the teams get at work improving their act" Don narrated.

MacArthur gets the applause meter to maximum. She and Sanders run to the Chill Zone.

"Second!" Don announced.

Cut to a black screen.

"Third!" Don announced as a picture of Emma and Kitty is shown.

"Fourth!" A picture of Geoff and Brody is shown next.

"Fifth!" A picture of Dwayne and Junior appears next.

At the physical Chill Zone Josee and Jacques arrive.

"Sixth!" Don announced.

"How are we getting worse!" Josee angrily asked.

"Josee remember about staying calm" Jacques said.

"This is as calm as I can be right now!" Josee said.

Cut back to the Black screen.

"Seventh!" A picture of Laurie and Miles appears.

"Eighth!" A picture of Chet and Lorenzo is shown next.

"Ninth!" Melvin and Trevor are shown next.

"Tenth!" Tom and Jen are the next ones shown.

Cut to the physical Chill Zone. Mary and Ellody run across the Carpet of Completion.

"Eleventh!" Don said.

"I'm glad we made it" Mary said.

"Yes" Ellody said. "Although those Finnish teens looked worryingly pale"

Bonnie and Jack run over to the Chill Zone next.

"Twelfth!" Don announced.

Carrie and Devin make it to the Chill Zone after them.

"Thirteenth!" Don announced.

Meanwhile backstage Noah comes in from getting booed off.

"How did we go from first to last?" Owen asked.

Noah glares at him.

"Oh right" Owen said. "At least the Goths aren't here"

They both look behind them to see Crimson and Ennui wearing new, and somehow more terrifying, outfits.

"Step aside, we're here to rock" Ennui said.

"Right this way" Lewis said.

"Oh hi guys" Owen said. "You would not believe it. There was this super cute preppy couple who claimed to be you two"

Ennui steps up on to the stage and stums at the air. Several explosion go off in the background. The crowd cheeres and the applause meter hits maximum.

 **Team Interview**

"I've never felt closer to Crimson then I do right now" Ennui said.

"I can't relive we almost gave up" Crimson said. "It's the darkness deep inside that counts"

"That was beautiful" Ennui said.

 **End Interview**

Crimson and Ennui go to the Chill Zone.

"That went well" Ennui said.

"Good for you. How exactly do you plan to run in that costume?" Don asked.

"We're just borrowing it" Crimson said. "We didn't have any non-Canadian money so we convinced the clerk to let us have it for the day"

Crimson and Ennui walk over to Josee and Jacques. Josee is polishing her lava rock.

"Whoa. Is that a Hawaiian lava rock?" Crimson asked.

"Yes. What of it?" Jacques asked.

"That's hardcore" Ennui said. "Those things cast a shroud of darkness over whoever plunders them"

"Your good luck charm has been cursing us this whole time!" Jacques said. "Well done Josee!"

"How do we break the curse?" Josee asked.

"There are two ways" Ennui said. "Either sacrifice a virgin"

"Well that's out of the question" Jacques said.

"Not necessarily" Josee said.

"What?" Jacques asked.

"Nothing" Josee said. "Carry on"

"Or bring it back to Hawaii" Ennui said.

Meanwhile backstage Tracey has curled up into a corner in fear.

"Nope I can't do this" Tracey said. "Unless there's a camera I'm not doing a thing"

"Listen Tracey I know Broadway was a disaster" Lewis said. "But despite all the stuff that went wrong... Like really, really wrong. Our musical was still the number three Broadway musical based off a presidents life"

"Really?" Tracey asked.

"Well, everyone thought it was supposed to be a comedy but other than that... Yeah" Lewis said. "Now get out there and get our careers back on track"

Elsewhere backstage Kitty is dragging Emma behind her.

"Just tell Noah you think air guitar is cute or something and he'll do better" Kitty said.

"But then he'll know I like him" Emma said. "We'll end up dating, falling in love, losing the race, I won't be able to pay for law school, he'll break up with me, and I'll spend the rest of my life crying over a bowl of cereal!

"Okay then..." Kitty said.

"Noah will be fine" Emma said. "It's not like Tracey will finish first"

"Move it!" Tracey said. "I have air guitaring to do"

Tracey runs past the both of them.

"Quick, you need to do something" Kitty said.

"On it" Emma said.

Emma runs over to Tracey.

"Hi Tracey. I just wanted to say good luck" Emma said.

"Thank you" Tracey said. "This should erase everything about the Reagan incident"

"Oh and whatever you do don't look directly into the eyes of anybody in the audience" Emma said.

"Wait what?" Tracey asked.

"Gotta go" Emma said.

Emma leaves. Tracey steps out on to the stage. She looks right into the eyes of one of the audience members.

"Oh God... What's wrong with their eyes... They're so... Unnatural" Tracey said.

Tracey slowly starts to back off the stage.

Lewis runs over to her.

"Tracey! What are you doing?" Lewis asked.

"Look at their eyes" Tracey said. "It's terrifying"

"It can't be that- Oh God... You're right" Lewis said. "Let's just... Come back after I read my Bible"

Lewis and Tracey get off the stage.

Meanwhile backstage Noah is about to get up.

"What do I do if I mess up?" Noah asked.

"Don't think about Emma or me or even the audience" Owen said. "Just get out there and do what you know"

Noah steps out on stage. He strums at the air jumps around. He does a slide and some flames flare up in the background. The applause meter hits maximum. Owen runs over to Noah and picks him up.

"Yeah! We did it!" Owen cheered.

Owen and Noah run over to the Chill Zone.

"Congratulations, you are in fifteenth" Don said. "Now I must inform Lewis and Tracey of the bad news"

Cut to backstage where Lewis is reading the Bible and Tracey is pacing around. Don walks over to them.

"Lewis, Tracey, for washed up actors you came surprisingly far" Don said. "But I'm here to say you're eliminated"

"We gathered" Lewis said.

Clips of Lewis and Tracey play while they talk over them.

"I've been an actor since I was 22 and some pasty teenagers with contact lenses is what stopped me... How disappointing" Tracey said over a clip of her and Lewis shopping in Dubai.

"On the bright side we promoted ourselves a lot. I got a call from my agent earlier today" Lewis said as a clip of him yelled at the cab driver in Paris was shown.

"Ooh! What'd they say?" Tracey asked as a clip of Lewis falling on his back in Iceland played.

"He wanted you to be an evil witch and me to be your goblin underling" Lewis said as the scene shifted to them getting in a cab outside.

"Eh... I've got better things to do. Doesn't sound very flattering" Tracey said.

"Did I mention it's a Disney picture?" Lewis asked.

"And now I want my cash" Tracey said.

* * *

 **I decided to bring back the Vegans. Why? Well I have some ideas for them such as a rivalry with the Magicians. Let me know what you think of that. As for the elimination I created Lewis and Tracey as comic relief characters. Mostly for jokes about them being egotistical and washed up. But there wasn't too much of a reason to keep them in for too long.**


	12. My Way or Zimbabwe

"Last time on the Ridonculous Race! Things heated up in Finland. The Goths found the source of the Ice Dancer's bad luck: Josee's unlucky Hawaiian lava rock. Rock was surprised when his bud Spud surprisingly Rocked. And to save Noah Emma nudged the Actors Lewis and Tracey into the last place and off the show. Where will we go next and who will hate it the most? Find out now on: The Ridonculous Race!"

Don is standing next to the Don Box in Finland.

"Welcome back to Finland," Don said. "Where yesterday's winners Rock and Spud are getting ready to receive their next travel tip"

"Woohoo! I still can't believe how totally awesome this is" Rock said. "We're in first"

"We're in first place?!" Spud said. "All right! We're killing it!"

 **Team Interview**

"I never expected to be in first place," Rock said.

"We're in first place?!" Spud said. "All right! We're killing it!"

"I just said that," Rock said.

 **End Interview**

Spud takes the travel tip.

"Go to the airport and catch the next flight to... Zim-bab-we?" Spud read.

Cut to a background of the Zimbabwe flag with a photo of Victoria Falls to accompany it.

"Located in southern Africa Zimbabwe has stunning flora, exotic fauna, and majestic scenery" Don narrated.

Cut to Don standing near the edge of Victoria Falls.

"Once teams land they must drive here," Don said. "To Victoria Falls. Which is twice the height of Niagara Falls. Here that North America? Your waterfalls are weak"

Cut to the airport in Finland where most of the teams are. Dwayne and Junior are sitting on a bench. Dwayne takes their plane tickets from Junior.

"Ow! Paper cut!" Junior exclaimed.

"Sorry son, but holding the important stuff is a dad's job," Dwayne said.

"I can hold my own tickets," Junior said.

"I know you can, I'm just not sure you should," Dwayne said. "Now when you're older can do things like this. For now, let's get you a bandage. And a lollipop"

The camera pans over to Laurie and Miles sitting on a nearby bench.

"I'm so excited to go to Zimbabwe," Miles said.

"I know, all the wildlife is astounding," Laurie said.

"This is a once in a lifetime chance," Miles said. "Be sure to take lots of pictures"

"I already bought a camera at the gift shop," Laurie said.

The camera pans over to Josee and Jacques talking to the clerk.

"You need to listen! We want to take a flight to Hawaii. But we only want to stay in Hawaii for ten minutes. Then we fly to Zimbabwe!" Jacques said.

"But you're making no sense," The clerk said.

"Fine, we make no sense. Do it anyway!" Josee demanded.

 **Team Interview**

"Jacques is mad at me," Josee said. "But he shouldn't because I didn't know it was bad luck when I took it from the island"

"Apology accepted," Jacques said.

 **End Interview**

Cut to a plane landing in Zimbabwe.

"Jacques and Josee are on their way to Hawaii. All the others have made it to Zimbabwe" Don narrated.

Cut to Don standing next to a bunch of Jeeps.

"Once they land they must drive these Jeeps to their next destination" Don explained. "Here come some of them now"

The Rockers and Best Freinds run out of the airport and get into their Jeeps and start driving.

"Head to Victoria Falls, where the Zambezi River borders both Zimbabwe and Zambia" Rock read. "Come on Spud let's go! I want to stay in first place!"

"We're in first place?!" Spud said. "We're killing it!"

Behind them are Carrie and Devin.

"I'll drive and you navigate," Carrie said. "Cool?"

"Me Devin, you Carrie" Devin joked.

"So adorable," Carrie said quietly.

"What?" Devin asked.

"Nothing," Carrie said quickly.

The camera pans over to Dwayne and Junior.

"Wowzers, I've always wanted to go on safari," Dwayne said.

"Yeah, this is seriously cool," Junior said. "I just want to get up see a-"

"No way mister. Stay seated" Dwayne said. "It's all fun and games until you hit your head on a tree branch"

 **Team Interview**

"My dad still treats my like I'm still five" Junior complained. "But I'm practically a man. I even have a chest hair"

"I'm pretty sure you don't," Dwayne said.

"Well... It's blond so it's hard to see... But it's there!" Junior said.

 **End Interview**

The Magicians and Police Cadets are racing their Jeeps.

"Hey Houdini, why aren't you being evil? Oh right, because you suck at it" MacArthur taunted.

"Trevor! Ram into them!" Melvin yelled.

"Nice going," Sanders said. "Now you've gotten them angry at us"

"It's a little something I like to call: Strategy," MacArthur said.

 **Team Interview**

"We studied human behavior at the academy. So I know how much stress a person can take before they lose it" MacArthur said. "And that magician was close. Really close. One more little shove and it's welcome to crazy town!"

 **End Interview**

"I'm not ramming into them," Trevor said.

"Yes, you are!" Melvin yelled.

"Mel, you're going insane with power," Trevor said.

"Would an insane person laugh like this: MWAHAHAHA!" Melvin said.

"Yes," Trevor said flatly.

"Just give me the damn wheel!" Melvin said.

Melvin tries to take the wheel from Trevor. Melvin accidentally ends up running them off the road.

"Whoa! I think you may have overdone it a bit" Sanders said.

Meanwhile, Rock and Spud make it to the next Don Box by Victoria Falls. They step out of their Jeep. Suddenly Melvin and Trevor's Jeep comes out of a bush.

"AHH! SLOW DOWN!" Melvin exclaimed.

"IT'S COMING RIGHT AT ME!" Rock yelled.

Trevor hits the breaks.

"Um... Hi" Trevor said awkwardly

"AH!" Spud screamed.

 **Team Interview**

"Spud, your reaction time is getting so much better," Rock said.

Spud doesn't say anything.

"Spud? You in there?" Rock asked.

Spud remains silent.

"This could take a while," Rock said. "I'll be back with a sandwich"

 **End Interview**

"Is anyone else here?" Melvin asked.

"No, we got here first," Rock said.

"We're in first?!" Spud said.

"For the millionth time! Yes!" Rock yelled.

"Alright! We're killing it!" Spud cheered.

Melvin runs over to the Don Box and takes the travel tip.

"It says Selfie Safari..." Melvin read. "What the heck is that supposed to mean"

Cut to Don floating down the river on a raft.

"In this challenge teams must take the waterproof cameras found in the Jeep glove compartment" Don explained. "After that, they must get into their raft and go over the falls while taking a self- AH!"

Don is cut off by his raft going over the falls. He climbs out of the water.

"If you miss the shot it's a long climb back up to try again," Don said.

Cut to Geoff and Brody reading their travel tips.

"After that go to Zambezi National Park home of the elusive white rhino" Geoff read. "And take a picture with the rhino"

Cut to Don standing by the Chill Zone.

"Once teams have their pictures it's a foot race to meet me at the Chill Zone" Don explained. "The last team to arrive may be heading home"

Cut to the Rockers, Police Cadets, Magicians, Father & Son, Surfer Dudes, Cousins, and Geniuses preparing to get their rafts in the river.

"Whoa," Geoff said.

"Wicked!" Brody said.

"Well I just found out how I'm gonna die," Bonnie said.

"Cool," Junior said.

"Don't worry you'll be safe," Dwayne said."All we need is crash test dummies that look exactly like us and can take selfies"

Junior facepalms.

Meanwhile, a plane lands in Hawaii.

"While most teams are in Zimbabwe our last place Ice Dancers are stuck between a lava rock and a faraway place" Don narrated.

Josee and Jacques go to the beach where they found the lava rock.

"Is this where you found it?" Jacques asked.

"Yes, I think so," Josee said. "Let's just toss it"

"We can't just throw it away," Jacques said. "We need some kind of ceremony"

"Fine we'll do your stupid ceremony," Josee said.

They build a small tower of rocks and put the lava rock on top. Josee and Jacques do a dance around it. Suddenly the ground starts to shake and a puff of smoke comes out of a nearby volcano.

"It's a sign! We've been forgiven!" Josee cheered.

"Back to the airport quick!" Jacques said.

Back at Victoria Falls, Rock and Spud are nearing the edge.

"It's just like that time we went on that roller coaster six times in a row," Rock said. "And we were like "WHOA!" and then we were like "BLECH!" but we didn't eat any funnel cakes and cheese balls so this should be easy"

"Yeah," Spud said. "Or at least not as messy"

The camera pans over to Dwayne tightening a life jacket on Junior.

"Dad... I think it's a bit too tight" Junior said.

"Let me just add a few more," Dwayne said.

Dwayne piles more life jackets on top of Junior.

"Dad!" Junior exclaimed.

 **Team Interview**

Junior now has so many life jackets his mouth is covered up.

"I just don't want him to get hurt," Dwayne said. "Is that so wrong"

"HMMPH!" Junior yelled.

 **End Interview**

Rock and Spud go over the waterfall and they take the picture. Dwayne and Junior go over the falls after them and are able to snap their picture.

Over by the start of the river Melvin and Trevor are getting into their raft.

"Okay, let's get going," Trevor said.

They start going down the river. Another raft bumps into them.

"Do you mind?!" Melvin said angrily.

Melvin turns around and sees that Laurie and Miles bumped into them.

"Oh God please don't kill me," Melvin said.

"What?" Miles said in confusion.

"Sorry, I'm just terrified of you two," Melvin said. "You understand, right?"

"Not really," Laurie said.

"That's great," Melvin said.

Behind them is Crimson and Ennui who are now back to wearing their regular costumes.

"Imagine if falling off the waterfall kills us," Crimson said. "The rush of adrenaline and then the sudden release of death..."

"That got me so turned on and I don't even know why" Ennui said.

The camera pans back to Emma and Kitty. Kitty looks incredibly happy.

"Kitty, you've been smiling nonstop" Emma said. "What's wrong with you"

"This challenge is about taking photo's," Kitty said. "Do you know how much I love that!"

"All too well," Emma said. "Just stop smiling it's getting weird"

"I make no promises," Kitty said.

The camera pans over to the Cousins and Geniuses.

"So... This is a tall waterfall right?" Jack asked.

"Yes," Ellody said. "One of the tallest in the world"

"What are the chances of surviving that fall?" Jack asked.

"Astronomically low," Mary said.

"Bonnie, can I hug you?" Jack asked.

"You're sixteen not six," Bonnie said. "You can handle this on your own"

Jack hugs her.

"Now look what you guys did," Bonnie said.

"Sorry," Mary said.

Meanwhile, the Ice Dancer's plane is flying through the air.

"As more teams complete the first challenge our last team is in danger of being eliminated" Don narrated.

Josee and Jacques burst into the plane's cockpit.

"You need to fly thing thing faster!" Jacques said.

"You're not allowed back here," The pilot said.

"Do you know who we are?" Josee asked.

"Aren't you the two figure skaters who failed at the Olympics?" The pilot asked. "I saw that video on the internet. It was hilarious"

"I had a concussion!" Josee yelled. "Just fly faster you daft fool"

Meanwhile, at the bottom of Victoria Falls Rock is searching for Spud in his raft.

"Spud!? Spud?!" Rock yelled.

Spud sticks his hand out of the water and gives the thumbs up.

 **Team Interview**

"What a trip," Spud said.

"I was all like "AHH!" and the falls were like "WOOSH!" and Spud was like "VROOM!" and stuff," Rock said.

"You should write books man," Spud said. "Cause that stuff is like... Poetry and stuff"

 **End Interview**

Dwayne is swimming around looking for Junior.

"Junior? Where are you?" Dwayne said.

He swims over to Rock and Spud.

"Have either of you seen my son?" Dwayne asked.

"Maybe he's over there?" Rock suggested.

Rock points to a lion.

"Gah!" Dwayne exclaimed.

"Um... Maybe it's a vegetarian lion" Rock said awkwardly.

Back on the top of the falls, Carrie and Devin go over it.

"AH! I regret so much in life!" Carrie exclaimed.

Chet and Lorenzo go over the falls.

"Take the picture Chet!" Lorenzo exclaimed.

"You take it!" Chet yelled.

"You have the camera you jerk!" Lorenzo said.

"I don't feel like it," Chet said.

"Oh my God!" Lorenzo yelled. "You are such a-"

They are both cut off when they land in the water.

"Nice going jerk now we have to take another picture," Chet said.

"How is it my fault?" Lorenzo asked.

"It just is," Chet said. "Come on let's just climb up"

Back at the top of the falls Noah gets in his raft. Owen jumps into the raft and sends Noah flying through the air.

"Take a picture!" Noah yelled.

"I've got you, buddy," Owen said.

Owen jumps off the waterfall and snaps a picture of him and Noah.

Back at the bottom of the falls, Chet and Lorenzo are climbing up the falls.

"Hey Chet, let me know what the fish say" Lorenzo said.

Lorenzo pushes Chet off the falls. Chet grabs Lorenzo's leg and they both fall back down.

"Nice going," Chet said.

"You grabbed my leg," Lorenzo said.

"You shoved me" Chet said

"We are never going to finish this challenge" Lorenzo said.

"Yeah, because you're a dork," Chet said.

"There's only one thing we can do if we want this to work" Lorenzo said. "... Work together"

"This could take a while..." Chet said.

Elsewhere on the waterfall, Dwayne starts to climb up.

"There's no way that lion ate Junior," Dwayne said. "My boy knows better. The family rule is that when you're lost go back to the last place you were together"

Meanwhile somewhere else on the river Junior is floating in his raft. Another raft bumps into him.

"Oh hey dad" Junior said. "I knew-"

Junior turns around to see Melvin and Trevor in the raft.

"Oh hi," Junior said.

"Hi kid" Trevor said. "Where's your dad?"

"We got separated" Junior said. "But he'll catch up. The family rule is that if you're lost go to your destination... Do you mind if I tag along?"

"Sorry kid, three's a crowd" Melvin said.

"Yeah, Mel's working through some issues" Trevor said.

"What do you mean?" Melvin asked.

"You nearly crashed our jeep just earlier" Trevor said. "And you wanted me to ram into those two cops"

"They were mocking me," Melvin said.

"How does that make it okay?" Trevor asked.

"You know what, I'm just gonna go," Junior said.

Meanwhile at the airport Josee and Jacques' plane lands.

"Most teams have already started the second challenge" Don narrated. "But for Jacques and Josee the heat is on"

Josee and Jacques rush out of their plane and push over the flight attendant.

"Out of the way sky waitress we're in a hurry" Josee said.

Meanwhile in the national park Tom and Jen are looking for the white rhino.

"I am so excited for this part of the challenge," Jen said. "I love wildlife photography"

"Me too," Tom said. "I've never taken any pictures or anything. But it can't be too hard"

Both of them hear a rustling in a bush.

"Should we go near it?" Tom asked.

"If I've learned anything from movies it's that you shouldn't go near the rustling bush" Jen said.

A lion jumps out fo the bush.

"Huh, you're right" Tom said.

"Run in the name of fashion!" Jen yelled.

Both of them start running from the lion.

Meanwhile, Sanders and MacArthur find the white rhino.

"I'll get a picture with it" MacArthur said.

"You can't just walk up to it," Sanders said. "It will kill you"

MacArthur ignores her and walks over to the rhino.

"Oh please I've owned dogs my whole life," MacArthur said. "The trick with animals is to show them you're in charge"

"This has nothing to do with dogs," Sanders said.

"Hey, rhino! Sit!" MacArthur yelled at the rhino.

The rhino glares at MacArthur and starts chasing her.

 **Team Interview**

"That is weird," MacArthur said. "Cause you know with dogs-"

"Rhinos aren't dogs," Sanders said.

 **End Interview**

Back at the waterfall Chet and Lorenzo are at the bottom.

"Okay, I'll give you a boost up" Chet said.

"Got it" Lorenzo said.

Chet holds out his hands. Lorenzo uses Chet's head as a stepping stone in order to get up on to the cliff face.

"That wasn't what I meant, idiot" Chet said.

"I know," Lorenzo said. "Here, I'll help you up now"

Lorenzo pulls Chet up onto the cliff.

"Thanks," Chet said. "You're slightly less of a jerk"

Meanwhile, Carrie and Devin notice a bush rustling.

"Get it" Devin said.

Carrie and Devin run towards the bush and end up accidentally tackling Junior.

Cut to Junior talking to the camera with the landscape in the background.

"If I knew I was going to be tackled while peeing in a bush in Africa I would have held it," Junior said.

Cut to Devin helping Junior off the ground.

"Are you sure you're okay?" Carrie asked.

"I'm fine" Junior said.

"Where's your dad?" Devin asked.

"We got separated" Junior explained.

"You mean you're out here alone," Carrie said.

"It's no big deal really," Junior said.

"Do you want to tag along with us for now?" Devin asked.

"Sure," Junior said. "Why not"

Junior notices some rhino footprints on the ground.

"Hey, look at those," Junior said.

"Good eye Junior," Devin said.

"Thanks," Junior said.

Meanwhile, Laurie and Miles have found a rhino.

"I call standing next to the rhino," Miles said.

"Aw... I was going to call it" Laurie said.

Miles walks closer to the rhino.

"What a nice gentle giant" Miles said. "We're both nearsighted"

The rhino glares at Miles.

"Laurie snap the picture!" Miles said. "I think it wants to kill me"

"Got it!" Laurie said.

Laurie takes the picture of Miles and the rhino.

"I have the picture now let's run for it," Laurie said.

Laurie and Miles start running before the rhino can give chase.

Meanwhile, MacArthur's running has finally tired out the rhino.

"What's the matter? Forty five minutes of running too much for you?" MacArthur taunted.

MacArthur snaps a picture of Sanders and the Rhino.

"Come on the Chill Zone can't be too far from here," Sanders said.

Meanwhile, Josee and Jacques are driving down the road.

"Drive faster Jacques," Josee said.

"Any faster and we might crash!" Jacques said.

They then notice someone lying on the road. Jacques hits the breaks. The person lying there is Dwayne. He is now covered in dirt and is shirt is wrapped around his head.

"My son... Have you seen my son?" Dwayne asked.

"Nope, haven't seen him," Josee said.

"I lost Junior!" Dwayne exclaimed.

Dwayne gets off the ground.

"Wow, your wife is going to kill you," Josee said.

"Well I deserve it," Dwayne said. "What is the number one rule of raising your kid?"

"Never let them get in the way of your gold medal," Josee said.

"Yes- Wait what?" Dwayne said. "It's don't let them get eaten by a lion after going over a waterfall in Africa"

"That seems oddly specific," Jacques said.

"Who cares about a dumb gold medal," Dwayne said.

"Jacques, run him over," Josee said. "Now"

Jacque steps on the gas in his Jeep. Dwayne gets out of the way before they hit him.

Meanwhile, Sanders and MacArthur are racing towards the Chill Zone. Geoff and Brody start to catch up.

"Hurry!" MacArthur said.

Sanders and MacArthur run over to the Chill Zone followed by Geoff and Brody. Don takes the cameras from them.

"Your photos check out," Don said. "Geoff, one question. How did you get your hat to stay on while going over a waterfall?"

"Lots of glue," Geoff said.

"That explains some things," Don said.

Meanwhile, Carrie, Devin, and Junior have found the white rhino.

"I'll take the picture with you" Junior offered.

"Thanks," Carrie said.

Carrie and Devin walk over to the rhino. Junior takes the picture.

"Okay, now you two take the picture with me," Junior said.

"Got it," Devin said.

Junior hands his camera to Devin. Junior walks over to the rhino and Devin takes the picture.

Back at the Chill Zone Melvin at Trevor run over to Don.

"Third!" Don announced.

"Yes!" Melvin said. "It's finally paying off"

"Yay, you continue to be a jerk," Trevor said.

Carrie and Devin make it to the Chill Zone.

"Fourth!" Don announced.

Junior runs over to Don.

"Junior, I'm sorry but both team members must be present," Don said.

"My dad's not here... Uh oh," Junior said.

Meanwhile, out in the middle of the park, Dwayne is still looking for Junior.

"Junior! Where are you!" Dwayne yelled.

An angry rhino starts chasing Dwayne.

Back at the top of Victoria Falls, Chet and Lorenzo finally made it back to the top.

"Finally!" Chet cheered.

"We made it," Lorenzo said.

"Somehow we managed not to get in a fight the entire time climbing up," Chet said.

"Come on, let's try and get another picture," Lorenzo said.

Meanwhile back at the Chill Zone Emma and Kitty a the ones there next.

"Fifth place!" Don announced.

Owen and Noah follow them over there.

"Sixth!" Don said.

Tom and Jen run over to Don.

"You're seventh!" Don said.

Crimson and Ennui go over to the Chill Zone next.

"Eighth!" Don announced.

Jack and Bonnie run over to the Chill Zone.

"Ninth!" Don said.

Mary and Ellody follow them.

"Tenth!" Don announced.

Laurie and Miles make it there after them.

"Eleventh!" Don said.

Rock and Spud run up to Don.

"Twelfth!" Don said.

 **Team Interview**

"It took forever to find a rhino," Rock said. "But twelfth isn't so bad"

"We're in twelfth!" Spud said.

"Yes spud... We are in twelfth" Rock said.

"Alright! We're killing it!" Spud said.

 **End Interview**

Back at the top of the waterfall, the Ice Dancers and Stepbrothers go over the waterfall and take their pictures. The two teams climb out of the water and go looking for the rhino.

"Chet! I see a rhino!" Lorenzo said.

Lorenzo points to a rhino in the middle of a field.

"Alright! Get a picture of me" Chet said.

Chet runs over to the rhino and Lorenzo snaps the picture. Josee pushes Chet out of the way.

"Out of the way kid it's our turn," Josee said.

"Hey! You can't do that!" Lorenzo said.

"You already have your picture. Stop complaining" Josee said.

"She's right, let's go!" Chet said.

Chet and Lorenzo leave the area.

"Quick Jacques, take the picture before they get too far," Josee said.

"Got it," Jacques said.

Jacques snaps the picture of Josee and the rhino.

"Let's get out of here!" Jacques said.

Elsewhere in the national park, Dwayne is looking around for Junior.

"Where could he be?" Dwayne said.

Dwayne moves some grasses out of the way and sees an angry looking rhino. Dwayne starts running from the rhino.

Meanwhile near the Chill Zone the Stepbrothers and Ice Dancers are racing.

"Hey, your outfits look stupid," Chet said.

"And girly," Lorenzo said.

"They're stylish!" Jacques said.

Dwayne passes them both while holding on to the horn of the rhino.

"Huh, didn't expect to see that," Chet said.

"I didn't get rid of that lava rock just to lose!" Josee said angrily. "Faster!"

The rhino throws Dwayne off of its horn and he lands in the Chill Zone.

"Dad! You're okay!" Junior said happily.

"Junior I'm so glad that you're safe," Dwayne said. "I'm sorry I didn't complete the challenge. I couldn't take pictures I just wanted to find you"

"Actually dad, I got the pictures," Junior said.

Josee and Jacques run over to the Chill Zone.

"Josee, Jacques, you are in forteenth," Don said. "Which means you're still in the race"

"Yes!" Josee cheered.

Chet and Lorenzo run over to the Chill Zone.

"Chet, Lorenzo, you are in last," Don said. "You are eliminated"

"What?!" Lorenzo exclaimed.

"That's unfair," Chet said.

"You're in last. It's the rules" Don said.

Footage of Chet and Lorenzo plays while they narrate over it.

"Man, getting eliminated is lame," Chet said over a clip of them falling off the cliff in Brazil.

"At least, I learned that you aren't a jerk all the time," Lorenzo said as a clip of them riding on their horse in Romania.

"Thanks... I think" Chet said over a clip of him spitting soup in Lorenzo's face in Morocco.

"You know what we should do. Make out own race show" Lorenzo said as the footage switched to them walking away.

"Yeah and they're all ninjas," Chet said.

"And robots," Lorenzo said.

"Yeah, ninja robots," Chet said.

* * *

 **This chapter was shorter than most others. But I didn't want to pad it out too much. As for the elimination I really didn't know what else to do with Chet and Lorenzo. And since I needed less non elimination rounds because of the extra teams they kind of just seemed like the best fit.**


	13. The Shawshank Ridonc-tion

"Last time on the Ridonculous Race! Dwayne feared he lost junior for good. And Melvin lost a good chunk of his sanity. After making a detour to return their not so lucky good luck charm Josee and Jacques managed to somehow remain in the race. However for the Stepbrothers Chet and Lorenzo things weren't so lucky. Even though they realized that they don't totally hate each other they still came in last and were eliminated. We have fourteen teams left. Which one will go next? I don't know yet. But let's find out on The Ridonculous Race!"

Don is standing next to a Don Box in the Chill Zone in Zimbabwe.

"We're back in Zambezi National Park," Don said. "Where yesterdays winners are about to collect the first tip"

Sanders and MacArthur run over to the Don Box.

"We're not losing our lead again" MacArthur said.

Sanders takes the travel tip from the Don Box.

"Yes! We're going to Austrailia" Sanders said.

Cut to a background of the Austrailian Flag with a picture of the Sydney Opera House to accompany it.

"Austrailia, home to the unique Sydney Opera House, Ayers Rock, and way too many poisonous spiders" Don narrated.

Cut to Don standing by a Don Box in Australia.

"After they take the airport to Melbourne they must find this Don Box in order to find out what's up down under" Don said. "I love word play"

Cut back to Zimbabwe where most of the teams have already gotten on to a bus.

"Why isn't this thing moving?" Tom asked.

"We need to wait for all the teams" Jen said.

Josee and Jacques step on to the bus. They are wearing black outfits with sunglasses now.

"Do we want to know why you're dressed like that?" Noah asked.

 **Team Interview**

"The pink was too friendly," Josee said. "The black screams get out of the way"

"And wash us with similar colours" Jacques added.

 **End Interview**

The bus is moving down the road. Dwayne and Junior are talking.

"Stick with me today," Junior said. "I don't want you getting lost"

"What? You were the one who got lost" Dwayne said.

 **Team Interview**

"For the record, I don't have a problem with directions," Dwayne said. "I have a problem following directions. It's part of my ruggedly handsome charm"

Junior gives Dwayne a weird look.

"Um... My doughy middle-aged charm?" Dwayne suggested.

Junior nods.

"I'll take what I can get" Dwayne said.

 **End Interview**

Cut to the inside of the plane where most of the teams are asleep.

"The teams are now on a thirteen-hour flight to Melbourne" Don narrated. "Sleep would be beneficial. So let's give them something to worry about"

Suddenly the plane's speakers and in flight tv screens turn on.

"Attention teams! This is a boomerang ticket" Don announced over the speakers.

A travel tip with a picture of a boomerang on it shows up on screen.

"If you get it you can use it to send back one team to repeat the last challenge" Don explained.

"I want one" Josee said.

The camera pans to Sanders and MacArthur.

"If we get that boomerang we need to be smart about it" Sanders said.

"Right, use it on the Ice Dancers" MacArthur said.

"No," Sanders said. "We look at the situation and pick the team-"

"Or use it on Josee and Jacques" MacArthur said.

"Will you listen," Sanders said angrily. "We're going to-"

"Off the Ice Dancers with the boomerang," MacArthur said. "Got it"

The camera pans to Emma and Kitty. Carrie walks over to them.

"Kitty, guess what? I'm telling Devin how I feel" Carrie said.

"Really? That's great" Kitty said.

"I've written everything I want to say to him down and I'll tell him" Carrie said.

"It sure is great to tell the guy you like how you feel" Kitty said.

Kitty nudges Emma in the ribs.

"I get it" Emma said.

The plane lands in Melbourne and the teams get off the plane. Carrie and Devin make it to the Don Box and take the travel tip.

"Devin," Carrie said. "I need to tell you-"

"Now's not a good time" Devin said.

Devin and Carrie run over to the nearest taxi and get in.

"Okay, it says that we need to stop in at Geelong Maximum Security" Devin read.

Cut to Don standing outside Geelong Prison.

"Geelong Prison closed in 1991" Don explained. "But in its 146 years of operation, it was the most brutal and violent lock up on earth. Now it's an extreme travel hotspot!"

Cut to Son standing inside one of the cells.

"Each team will be put into a cell with one of four methods to escape" Don explained. "Tunnels, trap doors, hidden tools, or bars"

Cut to Don standing on the banks of a river.

"Once they're out they can make their way to the final Don Box here on the Barwon river" Don explained. "Boomerang Tickets can only be used here. After you pass this point, they expire. And as a special bonus treat..."

Cut to Dwayne and Junior at the first Don Box. Junior is reading a travel tip.

"The first team to the Chill Zone gets to make a phonecall home" Junior read. "Cool, we could call mom"

"Or we could order a pizza" Dwayne joked.

Junior points to camera and glares at his father.

"Of course, I'm joking," Dwayne said. "I love your mother just as much as pizza... More than pizza"

Dwayne and Junior leave the Don Box. Josee and Jacques are the next ones over there. Josee takes the travel tip and realizes there's a Boomerang Ticket attached to it.

"Yes! We got the boomerang!" Josee cheered.

Josee raises her fists in victory and accidentally knocks Jacques over.

"Oh... Are you okay?" Josee asked.

"I think you knocked some teeth loose" Jacques said.

Back with Carrie and Devin, their cab is stuck in traffic.

"Aw man, traffic," Devin said. "Driver, I'll pay you extra if you go around these guys"

The driver nods and steps on the gas.

"So Devin," Carrie said. "You know how-"

Carrie is cut off by the car running over some rocks.

Meanwhile in Tom and Jen's cab.

"I can't believe that they're forcing us into a dirty prison cell" Tom said.

"I know, I wasn't expecting to do this until I got arrested in some fashion related scandal" Jen said.

"Yeah I- Wait what?" Tom asked.

"Sometimes you need to plan ahead for that sort of stuff" Jen said.

"Um... Okay then" Tom said.

"Don't act like you don't plan ahead" Jen said.

Meanwhile in Sanders and MacArthur's taxi.

"If we win the phonecall I'd like to call my grandmother," Sanders said. "She's quite old, and her health-"

"I'd call my cat, Mr. Princess" MacArthur said.

"Okay, but we only get one call" Sanders said.

"We'll flip a coin" MacArthur said.

"My grandmother is sick," Sanders said. "Your cat is... A cat! He won't even know you called"

"I'll know" MacArthur said.

Back with Carrie and Devin, they arrive at the Geelong.

"Thank you, driver... That was very scary" Carrie said.

Devin runs towards the door and Carrie stays behind to talk to the camera.

"I have to tell Devin how I feel," Carrie said. "If he calls Shelly it could disrupt everything"

Carrie runs over to the gates of the prison where Devin is. Before they can do anything two guards handcuff them.

"Welcome to Geelong" One of the guards said.

The Ice Dancers and Father & Son arrive at the prison. Dwayne notices his shoe is untied.

"Dang it," Dwayne said. "I knew I should have gotten slip on shoes"

Dwayne notices that one of the guards has already handcuffed Junior.

"Hey! What doy out think you're doing?!" Dwayne asked angrily.

Another guard knocks him out with his baton.

Cut to the guards escorting the Goths, Rockers, Sisters, Reality TV Pros, and Fashion Bloggers to their cells.

"More and more teams enter the Geelong" Don narrated. "Most go peacefully. Others... Not so much"

Back outside the prison, MacArthur is refusing to be handcuffed.

"I am a cop. I'm the one who's supposed to do this" MacArthur said.

The guard tackles her to the ground.

Cut to her and Sanders locked up in a cell. MacArthur is standing by the door talking to the guard that tackled her.

"Come on, it wasn't personal," MacArthur said. "I mean... It was your face I punched in. But I still respect you as a fellow officer of the law. Because you only cried a little"

"Are you going to mock him all day or are we going to find a way out?" Sanders asked.

"Pretty sure we have time for both" MacArthur said.

"Ugh..." Sanders groaned.

"Man, sometimes I wish you were a little more fun" MacArthur said.

"I with you were more professional," Sanders said. "Stop insulting and punching people. Can't you just play nice?"

"I play nice with you all the time" MacArthur said.

"Can you please keep it down in there!" Josee shouted from across the hall. We're trying to think"

"Don't worry, trying anything for the first time is hard" MacArthur said.

 **Team Interview**

"Come on, they walked right into that one" MacArthur said.

 **Second Interview**

"I hate those cadets!" Josee said angrily.

"We walked right into that one" Jacques said.

 **End Interview**

Meanwhile in Melvin and Trevor's cell.

"Okay, we're going to break out of here like in that Steve McQueen movie" Trevor said.

"Doesn't almost everybody die in the end?" Melvin asked.

"Bad example..." Trevor said. "Look, let's focus on getting out"

"Maybe we stab the guard" Melvin said.

"What..." Trevor said.

"It's what they do in the movies" Melvin said.

"Come up with a plan that doesn't involve any killing" Trevor said.

"That's a better plan" Melvin said.

Melvin lies down on the bed it collapses.

"Are you okay?" Trevor asked.

"It could be better..." Melvin said. "But it could be worse... For example, the floor could turn out to be a trap-"

The floor under Melvin opens to reveal that it is a trap door and he falls in.

"DOOR!" Melvin yelled has he fell.

A loud thud is heard.

"You okay down there?" Trevor asked.

"No..." Melvin said weakly. "Can you come down too?"

"Yeah, I'll think about it" Trevor said.

Meanwhile in Noah and Owen's cell.

"Hmm... I need to think of a way out of here" Noah said.

Noah looks behind him to see that Noah is not wearing pants.

"Do I want to know?" Noah asked.

"Um... I have to use the bathroom" Owen said.

"Oh dear God" Noah said.

Meanwhile in Mary and Ellody's cell. Mary taps her foot on the ground.

"Hey, Ellody, does this spot in the floor sound different?" Mary asked.

Mary taps her foot again and the floor sounds hollow.

"You're right," Ellody said. "We need to break open the floor"

Suddenly one of the walls to their cell collapses and Jack and Bonnie enter their cell. Bonnie is holding a pickaxe.

"Here's Bonnie!" Bonnie cheered. "Wait... This isn't the exit"

"Oh, hi guys" Jack said.

"What are you doing in here?" Ellody asked.

"Well we found this pickaxe inside my pillow and we kind of just broke down the nearest wall," Bonnie said. "What are you doing?"

"We think we've found a way out," Mary said. "We were just about to move this floor panel"

"Great, that's more progress than what I've got" Bonnie said.

Mary and Ellody remove a panel on the floor to reveal a long chute.

"So who wants to go first?" Jack asked.

Meanwhile in Jacques and Josee's cell. Josee is breathing heavily.

"It's like there's no air in here!" Josee said. "Do prisoners not get air? Is that part of going to jail?"

"There's plenty of air," Josee said. "Are you okay?"

"Yes," Josee said. "I just want some air"

Josee looks at the bars on the windows.

"It must be these bars! They're blocking the air" Josee said. "They're using special air blocking bars. I need to get out!"

Josee charges at the door and breaks it down.

"Nice going Josee" Jacques said.

"Finally, I have air!" Josee cheered.

Sanders and MacArthur notice that they broke out.

"Wait! If you help us break out we'll owe you one. You have my word" Sanders said.

"One condition. I want your partner to say that ice dancing is the best sport in the world" Josee said.

"You actually think it's a real sport?" MacArthur asked.

"MacArthur! Come on" Sanders said.

"Not happening" MacArthur said.

"This is our get out of jail free card and all you have to do is play nice for ten seconds" Sanders said.

"Fine" MacArthur said.

"So are you going to say it?" Josee asked.

"Ice dancing is the best sport in the world..." MacArthur mumbled angrily.

"Like you mean it," Josee said. "And louder"

"Ice dancing is the best sport in the world!" MacArthur said over enthusiastically.

"And who's the best at it?" Josee asked.

"You are..." MacArthur mumbled.

"We still can't hear you" Jacques said.

"You are the best ice dancer in the world!" MacArthur said over enthusiastically.

"That is so nice," Josee said. "Bye now"

Josee and Jacques walk past their cell.

"I knew it!" MacArthur yelled.

"You promised to help us" Sanders said.

"I am," Josee said. "I'm helping you go home"

 **Team Interview**

"I warned you about those, dirty, no good, ice for brains, jerks!" MacArthur said angrily.

"You did, and you were right," Sanders said. "We are never playing nice with them again"

 **End Interview**

Meanwhile in Carrie and Devin's cell. Devin is trying to move the bed.

"Come on, we need to win this round" Devin said.

"Or we could take a break" Carrie suggested. "I really need to tell you something"

Devin rips open a pillow and a file falls out.

"Yes!" Devin cheered. "So, what did you need to tell me?"

"Well, uh, growing up together I remember lots of things" Carrie began. "Like how happy you were when your training wheels came off your bike or when you wore your favourite shirt backwards for a whole school year. But the one thing I can't remember was a time I wasn't in love with you"

Carrie notices that Devin has already broken the bars and climbed out the window.

"Devin... Did you hear me?" Carrie called out the window.

"No, sorry, you can tell me later Carrie" Devin said.

Meanwhile in Owen and Noah's cell. Owen zips up his pants and gets off the toilet.

"Man, I feel so much better" Owen said.

"And now I'm blind," Noah said. "Good job"

"I wonder where it all went?" Owen asked.

Owen knocks on the toilet bowl and it sounds hollow.

"Hey, we could escape through there" Owen said.

"Um... No" Noah said. "There is no way in Hell you could get me through there"

The wall behind Noah begins to crumble and it breaks down. Emma and Kitty crawl through.

"How did we get into another cell?" Emma asked.

"Emma?" Noah asked.

"Noah?" Emma asked. "Funny running into you here"

"I know right" Noah said.

"Have you guys found a way out?" Emma asked.

"Um... Possibly" Noah said.

Owen takes the toilet off the ground and throws it across the room.

"Come on guys there's a way out now!" Owen announced.

"Ew..." Kitty said.

"It's okay," Emma said. "This place has been closed for decades so nobody's been using the toilets"

"Um... Yeah let's go with that" Owen said suspiciously.

"Double ew..." Kitty said.

"Number one or number two?" Emma said.

"Number two" Owen said.

"This is gonna be rough" Noah said.

Meanwhile, at the Don Box by the river Melvin and Trevor make it there first.

"Yes! First place! Number one!" Melvin cheered.

"Calm down" Trevor said.

"Sorry! But this is the first time I've been in first!" Melvin said.

Trevor takes a travel tip.

"It's an All-In" Trevor read. "Craft a Raft"

Cut to Don standing next to a pile of wood.

"In this second challenge teams must build a raft out of this wood and sail it down the Barwon river" Don explained.

Cut to Don standing by the Chill Zone.

"Last team to meet me here may be eliminated" Don said.

Cut back to Melvin and Trevor

"Since we're in the lead we can relax a bit" Melvin said.

"Are you sure?" Trevor asked.

"Trust me" Melvin said.

"I wasn't named Magician of the Year for nothing" Melvin said.

"Mel, you only got an honourable mention" Trevor said.

Meanwhile, Carrie and Devin are running towards the Don Box by the Barwon river.

"Can we please slow down?" Carrie asked.

"Sorry Carrie, I just really want to give Shelly a call" Devin said.

Meanwhile in Sanders and Macarthur's room. MacArthur rips apart the mattress in anger.

"See what happens when you play nice?" MacArthur asked. "They walk all over you!"

"Okay... There was no tool in the bedding. Let's just go look somewhere else" Sanders said.

"I wasn't looking for a way out, I was just mad," MacArthur said. "You want a way out?"

MacArthur rips the bars off the windows in anger.

"Here you go," MacArthur said. "After you"

"Um... Thank you" Sanders said.

 **Team Interview**

"If you think that was impressive wait until you see what else I can do," MacArthur said. "I can lift a boat. If I could kiss my own gluts I would"

MacArthur looks at Sanders.

"You want to kiss them?" MacArthur jokingly asked.

 **End Interview**

Meanwhile, in the sewers the Sisters and Reality TV Pros are looking for a way out. Everyone but Owen is covering their nose.

"Ugh, it smells so bad down here" Kitty complained.

"There could be a number of reasons for that" Owen said. "I mean who can really say wha-"

"Cut it out Owen. We know it's you" Noah said.

"I still don't know what you are talking about" Owen denied.

The four of them run into the Geniuses and Cousins.

"Oh hey, it's... Actually, I don't think we've met" Ellody said.

"I feel like we have," Noah said. "Your voice sounds familiar and it's freaking me out"

"I've never met you" Ellody said.

"Well I'm Emma and this is my sister Kitty" Emma introduced.

"Hi" Kitty said.

"I'm Noah and this is Owen" Noah said. "Owen is where the smell is coming from"

"I don't smell anything" Jack said. "That's probably because my sense of smell is impaired after a freak gardening accident"

"What?" Kitty asked.

"It's a long story," Bonnie said. "It's way less exciting than it sounds"

"So, what are you all doing travelling together?" Mary asked.

"We're in an alliance," Emma said. "What about you?"

"Huh, so are we" Mary said.

"I thought we were the only teams in an alliance" Owen said.

"So did we" Bonnie said.

 **Team Interview**

"We might have to get rid of the other alliance" Bonnie said.

"Why?" Jack asked.

"Because I'm paranoid," Bonnie said. ". They might get in the way of winning the money, And money is the most important thing"

"Why?" Jack asked.

"Stop asking" Bonnie said.

 **Second Interview**

"Kitty, we may have to get rid of the other teams in an alliance" Emma said. "They may become a threat to us"

"Are you sure?" Kitty asked. "Those Mary and Ellody don't seem too dangerous and that Jack guy didn't seem to bright. Bonnie just kind of seemed like a jerk"

"Trust me, they seem incredibly dangerous to our alliance" Emma said.

 **End Interview**

Meanwhile, Melvin and Trevor are floating down the Barwon river.

"This is it," Melvin said. "We're finally winning"

"Don't get your hopes up Mel" Trevor said.

"Don't call me Mel" Melvin said. "I knew a girl in high school named Mel. I didn't care for her"

Carrie and Devin pass by them.

"Faster!" Melvin demanded.

Melvin stomps on the boat and breaks a hole in it. The boat starts to fill with water.

"Oh crap..." Trevor said.

"Let's just hope we can get to the Carpet of Completion before those hippies" Melvin said.

Meanwhile, Josee and Jacques make it over to the Don Box.

"There it is!" Josee said.

Josee trips over a rock. Someone is heard laughing at her. Josee gets back up.

"Who laughed!?" Josee asked angrily.

Sanders and MacArthur run over to them.

"I believe that was me" MacArthur said.

Josee throws a handful of mud into MacArthur's face.

"You just messed with the wrong cadet" MacArthur said.

"I am going to enjoy this" Josee said.

Josee takes the Boomerang Ticket out of her pocket.

"The Boomerang!" MacArthur exclaimed.

Sanders takes her Boomerang Ticket out of her pocket.

"Drop it!" Sanders said.

"No" Josee said.

"Neither of us want to go home today" Sanders said. "But if we boomerang each other it's a fifty fifty chance of one of us going home"

"Oh she's right, this is a bad idea Josee" Jacques said.

"Rips yours in half and I'll do the same" Josee said.

"She's a liar. Don't trust her" MacArthur said.

"On three. We do it together, on three" Sanders said.

"Right, I'll count" Josee said. "One... Two... Three!"

Neither of them rip their Boomerang in half.

"I knew it!" MacArthur exclaimed.

"It's a trap" Jacques said.

"I've had enough of you" Josee said.

"So have I" Sanders said.

"Boomerang!" Sanders and Josee said at the same time.

"That was less dramatic than I thought it would be" Sanders said.

Cut to both teams being locked up in a cell.

"The Boomeranged teams have been sent to the mother of all Geelong cells" Don narrated. "The Black Hole. The race for not last begins for them"

"Perhabs a temporary truce is in order" Jacques suggested. "Just until we're free"

"I'll take bars and Sanders investigates trap doors" MacArthur said. "Jacques you look for tools. Josee you make a tunnel"

Meanwhile at the Chill Zone Carrie and Devin make it first.

"Alright we made it!" Devin exclaimed.

"Cool" Carrie said.

"Congrats on first place" Don said. "You've won the phone call"

Don hands them a cell phone.

"Is it cool if I call Shelly?" Devin asked.

"Um... Sure" Carrie said.

"Thanks" Devin said.

Devin dials Shelly's number.

"Damn it. It keeps going to voice mail" Devin said.

"You can keep trying until you reach someone" Don said.

"Devin, I really need to tell you something" Carrie said.

"Sorry Carrie, this isn't a good time" Devin said.

Meanwhile Laurie and Miles are floating down the river.

"It's so tranquil isn't it" Miles said.

"Yes it is" Laurie said. "The water is so peaceful"

A hand reaches out of the water and grabs on to the side of their boat.

"Ah!" Miles exclaimed.

Miles hits the hand with an oar. Melvin and Trevor rise out of the water.

"What the Hell" Trevor said.

"Sorry, we thought you were some sort of river creature" Laurie said.

"Happens all the time" Melvin said. "Hey, do you think we could share a boat with you? Ours kind of... Sunk"

"How?" Miles asked.

"It's a long story that we don't want to get into" Trevor said.

"We'll let you on" Laurie said. "Just don't think this means we're friends"

"I never did" Melvin said.

Melvin and Trevor climb on to their boat.

The camera pans back to Crimson and Ennui.

"I like Australia" Ennui said.

"I know. There are so many types of poisonous spiders" Crimson said.

The camera pans over to Geoff and Brody.

"Dude, my hands are getting tired" Brody said.

"Keep going bro, we're almost there" Geoff said.

The camera pans to Tom and Jen.

"Tom, the heat is starting to get to me" Jen said. "I feel like I might faint if we keep going"

"I know" Tom said. "Let's take a break"

"Good idea, we can't be too far behind" Tom said.

Tom and Jen put down their oars. Another raft bumps into theirs.

"Watch it!" Jen exclaimed.

Jen looks behind her to see Rock and Spud.

"Oh, sorry man" Spud said.

"Yeah, we totally didn't see you there" Rock said.

"How could you not see us?" Tom asked. "We were right in front of you"

"I've had some vision problems ever since I fell out of a hot air balloon" Spud said.

"Oh, okay- Wait, what" Tom said.

"It was at a music festival" Rock said. "You really had to be there""

"I see..." Jen said.

 **Team Interview**

"Those rock stars are weird" Jen said.

"I know" Tom said. "And don't even get me started on their sense of fashion"

 **End Interview**

Back with the Ice Dancers and Police Cadets in their cell.

"Guys, I found a trap door" Sanders said.

Sanders points to a square hole in the ceiling.

"If we get on each others shoulders we can get out" Sanders said.

"Good plan" Jacques said.

The four of them make a human ladder. Josee gets up first and pulls up Sanders.

"Once you're up there, if you double cross us, I'll make you pay" MacArthur said to Jacques.

"You don't scare me" Jacques said.

MacArthur tosses him off her shoulder and grabs him by the collar.

"I will break your limbs, tie you into a knot, and throw you off a cliff" MacArthur said.

"Okay, that actually does scare me" Jacques said.

MacArthur throws Jacques towards the ceiling. Sanders and Josee catch him.

Back at the Chill Zone Dwayne and Junior make it there next.

"Second place!" Don announced.

Cut to a black screen.

"Third!" Don announced as a picture of Emma and Kitty is shown.

"Fourth!" A picture of Owen and Noah appears next.

"Fifth!" A photo of Mary and Ellody is seen next.

"Sixth!" Jack and Bonnie's photo is shown.

Cut to Devin trying to call Carrie again.

"Come on! Please pick up" Devin said.

"Devin, can I please talk to you?" Carrie asked.

"I haven't talked to Shelly in a while" Devin said. "We can talk after I call her. Okay?"

"Okay... I guess" Carrie said.

Cut back to the black screen.

"Seventh!" Don announced followed by a picture of Crimson and Ennui showing up.

"Eighth!" A photo of Geoff and Brody is shown next.

"Ninth!" A picture of Rock and Spud appears.

"Tenth!" Tom and Jen's picture is shown.

Back in the Black Hole Josee, Sanders, and Jacques are struggling to lift MacArthur out of the cell.

"You know I really wasn't expecting you to have so much trouble with this" MacArthur said.

"Hey, we're doing our best here" Josee said.

Cut back to the Chill Zone where the Vegans make it there followed by the Magicians.

"Eleventh and Twelfth!" Don announced.

The camera pans to Devin trying to get Shelly on the phone.

"Ugh! Voice mail again!" Devin exclaimed.

"You can keep trying" Don said. "But once the last team is here you have to give me my phone back. It is really expensive"

Cut to the shore of the Barwon river where the Police Cadets and Ice Dancers are frantically building their rafts. Both teams put crudely made rafts down in the water and start rowing them towards the Chill Zone.

Cut back to Devin calling Shelly. This time he doesn't get voice mail.

"Shelly?" Devin asked. "Oh, thanks Ashton"

Devin looks away from the phone and turns to Don.

"Aston's her tennis instructor" Devin explained. "He's just getting her now"

Devin puts the phone back up to his ear.

"Hi, Shelly, it's me Devin" Devin said. "I missed you so- Wait what? We never broke up! You're dating Ashton! What do you mean you're breaking up with me now?! Please Shelly don't hang up!"

Devin puts the phone down.

"She hung up" Devin said.

Don takes the phone.

"I'd let you keep talking but I'm the one paying for long distance charges" Don said. "By the way, how's your girlfriend doing. I wasn't really paying attention"

"She broke up with me... She's dating her tennis instructor!" Devin said.

"Oh... Um... There, there, Devin" Don said.

Don tries to pat Devin on the head. Devin starts crying on Don's shoulder.

"Please stop" Don said. "This makes me feel uncomfortable. I'm not used to this much human contact"

Meanwhile the Police Cadets and Ice Dancers are racing down the river.

"Guess what ice brains. Your new outfits make you look stupid" MacArthur said.

"We won't be so stupid once we've defeated you" Josee said.

Josee takes her oar and knocks Sanders and MacArthur off their raft. Josee and Jacques get off their raft and run over to the Chill Zone.

"Thirteenth for the Ice Dancers!" Don announced.

"Yes!" Josee cheered.

 **Team Interview**

"We weren't cheering for our ranking" Jacques said.

"Thirteenth place is bad" Josee said. "But making a fool out of the cadets was worth cheering about"

 **Second Interview**

"Sometimes the bad guys win" Sanders said.

"I'm glad I could do this with my partner" MacArthur said. "It was... It, uh-"

"Are you crying?" Sanders asked.

"One tear is not crying" MacArthur said.

 **End Interview**

Sanders and MacArthur walk over to the Carpet of Completion.

"Sanders, MacArthur, you are a good team. I am very sad right now. I wish you nothing but the best..." Don said. "In the next round because this is a non-elimination!"

"Yes!" Sanders cheered.

"We made it!" MacArthur cheered.

MacArthur hugs Sanders.

 **Team Interview**

"We just need to put this one behind us and focus on winning" Sanders said.

"Winning. And crushing the Ice Dancers" MacArthur said.

"I can agree to that" Sanders said.

 **End Interview**

Don turns to the Camera while Sanders and MacArthur celebrate in the background.

"It was a close call for the Cadets and heartbreak for Devin," Don said. "Who knows what will happen next. You don't. Tune in next time for more of The Ridonculous Race!"

* * *

 **Not too much has changed this much chapter. Just a few extra bits from my OC's and the characters who didn't get much screen time in the original show. Also, for those of you wondering what movie Trevor was talking about it's called "The Great Escape". I've seen it and it's pretty good. Anyway, let me know what you thought of the chapter.**


	14. Down and Outback

"Last time on the Ridonculous Race! Our teams were sent to the big house. The Ice Dancers and Cadets rivalry really started to boil. And with the power of love Devin was given a chance to call Shelly... And then she dumped him. It was really sad. And it still is. Which team is going to get dumped this time? This is The Ridonculous Race!"

Don is standing right next to the Don Box in Austrailia.

"We're back in Austrailia," Don said. "And the winners of last round are the first to take a travel tip"

Carrie and Devin walk over to the Don Box. Devin is still crying.

"Hey, buddy, would getting the first travel tip make you feel better?" Carrie asked.

"Not really..." Devin said.

"I'll just get it" Carrie said.

Cut to Carrie talking to the camera with Devin crying in the background.

"Shelly dumped Devin. Which is horrible" Carrie said. "But also amazing for me... Wow that made me sound like a terrible person"

Cut back to them at the Don Box.

"Don't worry Devin," Carrie said in an attempt to comfort Devin. "There are people who still care about you"

"You're right!" Devin said. "I bet Shelly didn't even dump me. I just misheard her"

"Um..." Carrie said awkwardly. "That wasn't what I was-"

"Just wait til I tell Shelly about this," Devin said. "We are gonna laugh, and laugh"

Devins starts to walk away.

"Well that backfired" Carrie said.

Carrie looks at her travel tip.

"Bunny Bagging" Carrie read. "What's that?"

Cut to Don standing in a cabbage patch that's filled with bunnies.

"Yes, Bunny Bagging," Don said. "These fluffy fellers seem cute but they're considered thieving rodents to Australian farmers. The farmers put up fences but they still get in. Each team must get ten rabbits in a sack and then turn them into this fellow"

Don points to a farmer next to him.

"And as an added bonus, somewhere on this farm is an albino bunny," Don said. "The team that finds it can skip directly to the next challenge"

The teams run over to the farm.

"Let's go save this farm!" Rock cheered.

The teams run towards the bunnies and trample a bunch of cabbages.

"Freaking tourists..." The farmer muttered.

The camera pans to Jacques, now back in his standard pink uniform, reaching for a bunny. He grabs it and picks them up.

"This is the easiest challenge yet" Jacques said.

The bunny bites his hand.

"Josee! A little help!" Jacques yelled.

"Not now," Josee said. "I'm busy glaring at those stupid cadets"

 **Team Interview**

"They boomeranged us!" Josee said.

"And we did the same to them" Jacques said.

"And I want revenge!" Josee exclaimed. "Winning isn't enough. We need to make sure we're the ones to knock them out of the game"

"I think winning is enough" Jacques said.

"You're wrong!" Josee yelled.

 **End Interview**

Josee walks up behind Ennui.

"Oh, hi... Buddy" Josee said. "Mind if I borrow some of your makeup?"

"Don't pretend to be friendly. It doesn't suit you" Ennui said. "But you can use my makeup if you tell me where your got that unitard"

Elsewhere in the cabbage patch, Rock and Spud are following a bunny.

"Okay Spud, just keep doing what you're doing" Rock said.

Rock starts running towards the rabbit. But Rock wasn't paying enough attention and he crashes into Tom.

"Ow, my ankle!" Rock exclaimed.

"I think I chipped a nail" Tom said.

Jen and Spud run over to their partners.

"Oh my God! Tom are you okay?" Jen asked.

"I spend hours on my nails every day," Tom said. "What do you think?"

"Hey man, are you like, okay?" Spud asked.

"No Spud, I think twisted my ankle" Rock said.

Rock gets back up.

"Luckily I still have another foot" Rock said.

Rock takes a step and his good foot gets stuck in a rabbit hole.

"Not again!" Rock exclaimed.

"Huh, I wonder why there are so many rabbit holes around here?" Spud asked.

 **Team Interview**

"I'm starting to really not like those rock musicians" Jen said.

"I know, they literally have zero taste," Tom said. "I do feel bad about that guys ankle"

"Yeah," Jen said. "But still. They are sort of becoming a nuisance"

 **Second Interview**

"Man those fashion guys were weird," Spud said. "Even for a girl that Jen lady was feminine"

"Yeah, I know," Rock said. "By the way Spud, you sure you'll be able to handle the rest of this challenge without me?"

"What?" Spud asked. "Sorry, I wasn't paying attention"

"I'm doomed" Rock said.

 **End Interview**

Bonnie is trying to grab a rabbit. She reaches towards it but it burrows underground and Bonnie gets her hand stuck in the hole. The rabbit comes above the ground again. Bonnie tries to grab the rabbit but it digs underground again and Bonnie gets her other hand stuck.

"Mary, Ellody, Jack! Help me!" Bonnie yelled.

Ellody, Jack, and Mary walk over to Bonnie.

"How did you manage this?" Ellody asked.

"It's happened to me before" Jack said.

"It doesn't matter," Bonnie said. "Help me get out"

"Hey, guys," Mary said. "Look at what's going on with Ennui over there?"

Mary points off to the left.

The camera pans to Ennui who is surrounded by bunnies. Some are even cuddling his leg.

"Crimson... It's happening again" Ennui said.

 **Team Interview**

"Cute and fluffy animals love Ennui," Crimson said. "It is somehow adorable and repulsive at the same time"

"I don't want to talk about it" Ennui said.

"We hate cute things" Crimson said.

 **End Interview**

Melvin and Trevor are looking for the albino bunny.

"Where could it be?" Melvin asked. "I bet those stupid hippies have already found the albino by now"

"Excuse me!" A voice from behind them said.

Melvin and Trevor turn around to see Laurie and Miles.

"What did you say about us?" Laurie asked.

"Um... I said you found the albino bunny" Melvin said.

"Good" Miles said.

"Hey, don't you feel bad about potentially hurting this rabbits?" Trevor asked.

"No. We're trying to do this as humanely as possible" Miles said.

"Well that's good" Trevor said.

"Psst! Trevor!" Melvin whispered to his partner. "I think I see a rabbit"

Melvin points to a pair of ears sticking out of a nearby bush.

"Are you sure that's a rabbit?" Trevor asked.

Melvin nods. Melvin walks up to the bush and grabs the ears. He pulls a kangaroo out of the bush.

"Um... Mel, I'm pretty sure that's not a rabbit" Trevor said.

"Your friend is right" Laurie said.

"I'm sure that this is a bunny," Melvin said. "As sure as the sun revolves around the earth"

"Um... What?" Miles asked.

The kangaroo kicks Melvin in the face and he goes flying and hits a tree.

Meanwhile, Rock is lying on the ground. Spud is trying to adjust his leg.

"Does this hurt?" Spud asked.

Spud moves around Rock's ankle.

"Ow!" Rock exclaimed. "Yes!"

"How about this?" Spud asked.

Spud moves Rock's ankle again.

"Ouch!" Rock exclaimed.

"Oh, I know what the problem is," Spud said. "I don't know what I'm doing"

Cut to Rock talking to the camera with Spud chasing a rabbit in the background.

"I'm the lead singer of this band," Rock said. "Spud is... The soda machine at the venue. If he wants to win he needs to help me out more. And stop eating my money"

Cut to Sanders and MacArthur running over to a group of bunnies. They point at the rabbits as if they have guns.

"Freeze! Everyone on the ground!" MacArthur said to the rabbits. "That's right rabbits. The salad bar is closed"

The camera pans to Josee and Jacques hiding behind a tree and watching the Cadets. Jacques takes a rabbit out of their sack.

"I don't understand," Jacques said. "How is giving up one of our rabbits supposed to sabotage them?"

"Watch an learn" Josee said.

Josee takes Ennui's makeup out of her pocket and puts it on the rabbit.

The camera pans back to Sanders and MacArthur.

"Okay, I think we've got all the rabbits we need" Sanders said.

The rabbit covered in makeup hops past them.

"Look, it's the albino bunny" MacArthur said.

"But we've got more than enough rabbits here" Sanders said.

"Can't talk right now" MacArthur said.

MacArthur lets go of the sack of rabbits and starts chasing after the rabbit.

"MacArthur, wait!" Sanders exclaimed.

All the rabbits in the sack MacArthur dropped hop out.

"Well this went poorly" Sanders said.

Meanwhile, Devin grabs two rabbits and takes them over to Carrie.

"Yes! Shelly is going to be so proud" Devin said.

"I don't think Shelly will care" Carrie said.

"What are you talking about," Devin said. "That whole "Breakup" was a misunderstanding"

"I'm pretty sure it wasn't" Carrie said.

"I don't know what you're talking about" Devin said.

Devin walks away.

Meanwhile, the Magicians and the Vegans are in a bush and watching the kangaroo.

"Mel, why are we still doing this?" Trevor asked. "It is so clearly not a rabbit"

"It's about the principal," Melvin said. "I don't want those tree huggers to get it"

"Well we don't want you wannabe Houdini's to get the kangaroo either" Laurie said.

"Yeah, you could hurt it" Miles added.

"Good, I guess we're in agreement" Melvin said.

"I guess so" Laurie said.

"Good!" Melvin said.

"That's great!" Laurie said.

"I'm gonna go get it that kangaroo right now!" Melvin said.

"So are we!" Laurie said.

The Vegans and Magicians step out of the bush and run towards the kangaroo. The kangaroo kicks both teams back into the bush.

"This plan wasn't thought out too well..." Miles said weakly.

"Agreed" Trevor said.

"Why do the cute animals always hate me..." Laurie said.

Meanwhile, a farmer is driving a tractor. The bunny with makeup jumps past the tractor.

"Huh, there's something you don't see every day" The farmer said.

MacArthur runs over to the farmer and pushes him out of his own tractor.

"Official police business! I am commandeering this vehicle!" MacArthur yelled.

MacArthur drives off and starts chasing down the bunny with makeup. She runs over several cabbages.

"Your crop destroying days are over!" MacArthur yelled at the rabbit.

The bunny runs into a nearby corn field.

"You can't hide!" MacArthur yelled.

MacArthur drives the tractor into the corn field.

The bunny gets out of the corn field and runs towards a tank of gas.

"Uh oh" MacArthur said.

MacArthur hits the breaks on the tractor and it only slightly taps the gas tank.

"Phew," MacArthur said. "That was really close. Imagine if-"

The tank of gas then explodes. The bunny with makeup quickly runs away from the explosion and back into the corn field. MacArthur somehow survived the explosion and drives out of the fire and starts chasing the rabbit through the field again.

"You can't run forever!" MacArthur yelled.

The rabbit runs to the edge of a dock near a pond. MacArthur forgets to hit the breaks and goes flying into the water.

Cut to the Surfer Dudes and Ice Dancers collecting bunnies.

"Wait, dude, did you hear a splash?" Geoff asked.

"Yes, I think it was a tractor" Brody said.

"Oh, yeah, that must have been MacArthur" Jacques said.

"Yes I think she called for help" Josee said.

"I'm coming!" Brody yelled.

"Wait, bro" Geoff said.

Brody runs off.

"Great, now I need to follow him" Geoff said.

Geoff puts down his bag and runs after Brody.

"Hmm... He just left his bag right out in the open" Josee said. "It would be a shame if someone were to steal it"

"Someone like us" Jacques said.

Meanwhile, Carrie walks over to Kitty.

"Hey Kitty, can I ask you something?" Carrie asked.

"Sure thing" Kitty said.

"Devin is acting real weird ever since Shelly broke up with him," Carrie said. "Do you know what that's about?"

"Yeah, the same thing happened when Jake broke up with Emma," Kitty said. "She was super in denial"

"The same thing is happening with Devin" Carrie said.

"After that she was really angry for a while" Kitty said.

"Yikes, I hope Devin won't be like that" Carrie said.

"Emma got over it eventually," Kitty said. "And so will Devin. You need to tell him how you feel at some point"

"I'll try" Carrie said.

Cut to Josee and Jacques putting down their sack of rabbits down next to the farmer.

"Give us our tip" Josee said.

"Got it" The farmer said.

The farmer hands them their travel tip.

"It says we have to fly our own plane" Jacques read.

Cut to Don standing next to a bunch of glider planes.

"That's right," Don said. "Teams must fly these gliders to-"

Cut to Don at the Chill Zone in New Zealand.

"- The Chill Zone at New Zealand's Aspiring Mountain" Don finished.

Don takes a phone out of his pocket and dials a number.

"Hey, will our teams know that there is a new Zealand?" Don asked the person on the other side of the phone. "Okay good"

Cut to Owen and Noah cornering a group of bunnies.

"Okay, how do we capture these things?" Noah asked.

"I know" Owen said.

Owen falls on top of the bunnies. He gets back up now holding the bunnies in his arms.

"That works" Noah said.

The camera pans to Dwayne and Junior. Dwayne reaches his hand into a rabbit hole.

"Be careful dad" Junior said.

"No worries sport," Dwayne said. "I know what I'm-"

A rabbit bites his hand.

"OW!" Dwayne shouted.

Meanwhile, Rock is still lying on the ground. A rabbit hops by him.

"All right! Just my luck" Rock said.

Rock reaches for the bunny but Tom runs over there and grabs it before he does.

"Hey! Give that back" Rock said.

Rock grabs Tom's leg.

"Careful, watch the shoes," Tom said. "They cost more than your whole outfit"

"Come on dude," Rock said. "Just let me have this one. Spud is terrible on his own"

"Sorry, but me and Jen kind of want to win also" Tom said.

Meanwhile, the Vegans and Magicians are now looking tired out.

"Okay, let's call stop chasing that kangaroo" Miles said.

"Deal" Trevor said.

"Okay" Melvin said.

"I'm glad we have some reason" Laurie said.

Melvin sees a pair of ears sticking out of a bush.

"Look, another rabbit!" Melvin said.

The Vegans and Magicians run towards the pair of ears. Miles grabs the ears and pulls it out of the bush. The ears turn out to belong to a baby kangaroo.

"Um... Hi, I think I saw your mom earlier" Miles said.

The mother kangaroo bounces over to the two teams.

"Hi..." Laurie said awkwardly.

"Crap" Melvin said.

The kangaroo grabs its baby and then kicks the Magicians and Vegans into a nearby rock.

"I... Hate... Australia..." Trevor said weakly.

Meanwhile, Crimson and Ennui hand their sack of rabbits to the farmer.

"Take it away from us" Ennui said.

The farmer gives them their travel tip. Crimson and Ennui start to walk away.

"I never want to see those fluffy balls of despair ever again" Ennui said.

"It's weird though, how could something so cute destroy a whole continent" Crimson said.

"They're like a plague," Ennui said. "A happy hopping wave of famine and death"

Ennui looks behind him and sees a dark furred bunny.

"I think it's trying to say something to me" Ennui said.

Meanwhile, Spud is chasing after a rabbit.

"Come on! Please slow down!" Spud said.

Spud steps on a rake on the ground and it hits him in the face. Spud falls over backwards and lands on a bunny. He picks it up.

"Alright! I finally found one!" Spud cheered.

Rock drags himself over to his partner.

"Way to go Spud" Rock said.

Spud lets go of the rabbit.

"Whoa! A snake" Spud said.

Spud points to a sleeping snake that looks like it swallowed some rabbits.

"Earth to Spud, we're supposed to get rabbits" Rock said.

"We got all we need right here" Spud said.

 **Team Interview**

"I am a pro at identifying bulges," Spud said. "I can tell if my pet snake has swallowed anything. My phone, some kids bike, the neighbours cat"

"Maybe you shouldn't let your snake out of the house" Rock said.

 **End Interview**

Rock is holding open the sack and Spud is holding the snake.

"Ready?" Spud asked.

"Yep" Rock said.

Spud squeezes the snake and it coughs up the rabbits.

"Nice work Spud," Rock said. "We got all the rabbits. And you did it with almost no help from me"

"Sweet!" Spud cheered.

Spud starts pretending the snake is a guitar.

"That's nice Spud but we kinda got to go" Rock said.

Spud ignores him and continues to rock out.

"Ah what the Hell" Rock said.

Rock start to air guitar too.

Meanwhile, MacArthur rises out of the water. Brody and Sanders run over to her.

"You're okay!" Brody said.

"You can't just run off like that" Sanders said. "I lost all our other rabbits"

"Relax," MacArthur said. "I got the albino"

MacArthur takes the bunny with makeup out if the water. The makeup washes off.

"What the- It was a fake" Sanders said.

"Bad bunny" Brody said.

"The bunny didn't do this," MacArthur said. "But I think I know who did"

Meanwhile, at the Chill Zone in New Zealand Josee and Jacques make it there first.

"Congratulations Ice Dancers. You are in first place" Don said.

"Yes!" Jacques cheered.

"The gold is finally ours!" Josee cheered.

"Again, there is no actual gold," Don said. "But congrats on winning though good sportsmanship"

"What?" Josee asked.

"Kidding, your victory is highly suspect," Don said. "But I'm too busy to look into that today"

Meanwhile, in the air, Bonnie and Jack are in their glider.

"Jack, do not touch anything in here" Bonnie said.

"I wasn't" Jack said.

"Good," Bonnie said. "I don't want you to break anything"

"Why would you think I'd do that?" Jack asked.

"Remember grandma's tea set?" Bonnie said.

"Yeah," Jack said. "I broke- Oh, now I get it"

The camera pans back to Crimson and Ennui in their glider. Ennui is holding the dark furred bunny which is now wearing makeup.

 **Team Interview**

Ennui is holding the rabbit up to the camera.

"I call him Loki," Ennui said. "He's on our team now"

"He's named after the dark Norse God because he destroys lives" Crimson said.

"He's also super low key" Ennui said.

Loki growls.

 **End Interview**

Meanwhile, the Magicians and Vegans are hiding from the kangaroo behind a rock.

"What do we do about that thing?" Trevor asked.

"Well we can't hurt it" Miles said.

"Why not?" Melvin asked.

"Because we don't want to hurt any animals" Laurie said.

"Sometimes survival is more important than your feelings" Melvin said.

"He does kind of have a point" Miles said.

"Does that mean you'll help me get rid of this thing?" Melvin asked.

"Sure" Miles said.

"Don't mind me, I'll just be cowering in fear" Trevor said.

Miles and Melvin get out of the bush.

"Alright your overgrown possum. We aren't afraid of you" Melvin said.

"Um... Uh, yeah. What he said" Miles said nervously.

The kangaroo kicks them both and they crash into a tree.

"This was a mistake..." Miles said weakly.

"I hate everything..." Melvin said weakly.

The albino rabbit jumps on to Miles' chest.

"The albino!" Miles exclaimed.

Miles gets up and picks up the albino rabbit.

"Give it to me!" Melvin exclaimed.

Melvin grabs the rabbit and starts fighting over the albino with Miles.

Laurie and Trevor run over to their partners.

"You both need to calm down" Trevor said.

"I am calm!" Melvin yelled.

Don walks over to the two teams.

"Um... What's going on?" Don asked.

"I found the albino!" Melvin and Miles said at the same time.

"Wait, which one of you?" Don asked.

"Me!" Miles and Melvin said simultaneously.

"Miles found it!" Laurie yelled.

"We fought hard for this" Trevor said.

"That's not a good reason" Laurie said.

"Yes it is" Trevor said.

"Okay... I was not expecting this" Don said.

"Who gets it?" Miles asked.

"Um... Let me think" Don said. "Tell you what, I'll just say you both found the albino bunny. That means you get to go right to the next challenge"

"Thank God" Melvin said.

"Yes" Laurie said.

Meanwhile, Crimson and Ennui make it to the Chill Zone.

"Second place!" Don cheered.

"Don't care" Crimson said.

Tom and Jen run over to Don.

"Third!" Don announced.

Dwayne and Junior run over to the Chill Zone.

"Fourth!" Don said.

"Cool" Junior said.

Emma and Kitty run up to the Chill Zone.

"Fifth!" Don announced.

"All right!" Kitty cheered. "We did well"

"Don't get too excited," Emma said. "Overconfidence is a weapon in the wrong hands"

Meanwhile, the Police Cadets and the Surfer Dudes are the only ones left at the farm.

"This doesn't look good," MacArthur said. "We're the last ones here"

"Look on the bright side," Geoff said. "We got dibs on the whole place"

"Yeah, and we're tied for last" Sanders said.

"I'll go grab our rabbits real quick" Geoff said.

Geoff runs off.

"I will gladly share our bunnies with you... Where ever they are" Brody said.

Geoff runs back.

"Bad news bro," Geoff said. "Looks like our bunnies escaped"

"We can't think about that now," MacArthur said. "We need to bag a load of rabbits and fast. And I think I know how"

Cut to later where MacArthur has taped carrots to her.

"Let's do this!" MacArthur exclaimed.

The rabbits pounce on her. MacArthur walks up to the farmer.

"This is for my partner and the surfers... Please get them off me" MacArthur said.

Meanwhile, Rock and Spud are up in their glider in the air.

"Whoa, the clouds totally look like stuff" Spud said. "Like, that's a vanilla milkshake. Oh, and that one's a marshmallow"

"Dude! Look out for that mountain!" Rock exclaimed.

"What?" Spud asked. "None of them look like a-"

Spud crashes their glider plane into the side of a mountain.

"Well crap..." Rock said after a short pause.

 **Team Interview**

"It's cool that we're alive and all" Rock said. "But next time I'll drive the plane"

 **End Interview**

Meanwhile, Carrie and Devin are up in the air.

"What a lovely day for a glide" Devin said.

"Wow, I thought you'd be too angry to fly" Carrie said.

"What could I be angry about?" Devin asked.

"Oh, I don't know, it's just that Shelly's out there laughing, partying, playing tennis. That sort of stuff" Carrie said.

"No, no, I mean it's just- I'm sure she's..." Devin said before trailing off. "Who takes tennis lessons anyway! It's not even a real sport. Like golf, or bowling. I'm gonna call her right now"

"Now might not be a good time..." Carrie said nervously.

"I need to get to the ground" Devin said.

Devin pulls into a nosedive and crashes into Noah and Owen's glider. Both planes crash on the ground. The two teams climb out of the wreckage.

"Ugh... What happened?" Noah asked.

"Look! The Chill Zone!" Owen announced.

Noah and Owen run over to the Chill Zone.

"Sixth!" Don announced.

Carrie and Devin make it there next.

"Seventh!" Don said.

The Cousins and Geniuses run over to the Chill Zone.

"Eighth and ninth!" Don announced.

"That's not too bad" Jack said.

"We could have done better' Mary said.

"Agreed. The odds were in our favour" Ellody said.

Geoff and Brody run up to Don.

"Tenth!" Don announced.

Sanders and MacArthur shortly follow them.

"Eleventh!" Don said.

Don turns to the camera.

"There are only three teams left: The Vegans, Rockers, and Magicians" Don announced. "The last team to meet me might be going home"

Up in the air, Melvin and Trevor are flying peacefully.

"I'm glad we got found that albino," Melvin said. "And got rid of that kangaroo"

"You said it," Trevor said. "Just smooth sailing from here"

Trevor looks up and sees that the kangaroo held on to the back of the plane.

"You have got to be kidding me..." Trevor said.

The kangaroo kicks the wing off their glider. The Magicians' plane spirals out of control and crashes into the Vegans plane.

Meanwhile, Spud climbs out of the wreckage of his plane.

"Alright! I can see the Chill Zone from here" Spud said. "Come on Rock. Let's go"

"I can't move," Rock said. "This seatbelt is stuck. Go on without me"

"No way man," Spud said. "It's like your mother always said: If anyone is going to get you killed, it's gonna be me!"

Spud takes Rock's seatbelt off and picks him up.

"Thanks" Rock said.

"I'll get you off this mountain or die trying!" Spud yelled.

An avalanche starts up.

"I'm gonna say "My bad" because this is gonna be bad" Spud said.

The avalanche engulfs Rock and Spud.

Meanwhile, at the bottom of the mountain, the Vegans and Magicians crawl out of the rubble of their gliders.

"Today was a horrible disaster..." Melvin said weakly.

"I agree with you..." Laurie said.

"If we get through this let's call a truce..." Trevor said.

"Good idea" Miles said.

Miles and Laurie nod.

"On the bright side, that kangaroo is gone" Melvin said.

The kangaroo jumps out of the wreckage of the gliders. The kangaroo bares its teeth.

"Melvin, if we die, I want you to know that your moustache makes you look attractive" Trevor said.

"And I want you to know that I'm dating your sister without you knowing" Melvin said.

"What?" Trevor asked.

"Nothing!" Melvin said quickly.

"Miles, since we're about to be killed by a kangaroo I just want to let you know I've been eating meat behind your back" Laurie said. "I just think bacon is delicious"

"In that case, I want you to know that your Rasta hat looks tacky" Miles said.

"I don't know how to take that" Laurie said.

The kangaroo starts chasing the two teams towards the Chill Zone.

"And here they come now," Don said. "Looks like this is game over for the Rockers"

The avalanche then falls on top of the Vegans, Magicians, and Don.

Cut to later where the Rockers, Magicians, and Vegans are now wrapped up in towels.

"Well I can safely say that this is the closest race we've had" Don said. "Our judges are going to really have to go over this to-"

Don's earpiece start buzzing and he answers it.

"What do you mean we don't have judges?" Don asked. "What about that guy at the crafts table? No, wait, he's eating a bagel"

"So? Who won?" Miles asked.

"This may take a while," Don said. "I need to review the footage"

The camera pans to Melvin and Trevor.

"Trevor, if we aren't eliminated I promise to drop the whole villain thing" Melvin said.

"That would be the best thing you've done on this whole show," Trevor said. "Also, what was that you said about my sister?"

"Nothing!" Melvin said quickly.

The camera pans to Laurie and Miles.

"So what were you saying about eating meat?" Miles asked.

"You must have misheard me," Laurie said. "I don't remember saying anything of the sort"

The camera pans to Rock and Spud,

"What are we waiting for?" Spud asked.

"We're finding out who gets eliminated" Rock said.

"What?!" Spud exclaimed.

"Okay, I have made my decision," Don said. "Rock, Spud, you are in twelfth!"

"Cool" Spud said.

"Awesome!" Rock said.

"What about us?" Laurie asked.

"Yeah, which one of us got eliminated?" Trevor asked.

"I was getting to it," Don said. "Laurie, Miles, you're in thirteenth!"

"We made it!" Miles cheered.

Miles hugs Laurie.

"Melvin, Trevor, you're out" Don said.

"Crap... What do we do now?" Melvin asked.

"Walk to the airport" Don answered.

"We have to walk all the way?" Trevor asked.

"We're in the middle of the mountains. There aren't any taxis around" Don said.

"We'll be going" Melvin said.

Clips of Melvin and Trevor competing play while they speak over them.

"Well, that could have gone better. We spent our last day here fighting with hippies and getting beat up by a kangaroo" Trevor said over a clip of Melvin's cape catching fire in Hawaii.

"We kind of went down hill after I tried to be evil" Melvin said as a clip of him pushing Mickey into an open grave in Romania.

"It definitely went down hill" Trevor said over footage of them fighting over their Jeep in Zimbabwe.

"I'm going to leave the villain work to the professionals for now on" Melvin said as the footage switched to them walking into the sunset.

"By the way, were you serious about dating my sister?" Trevor asked.

"Um... Maybe" Melvin said.

* * *

 **I had lots of fun writing this chapter. Especially with the challenge. I hope you liked it too. As for the elimination, I did all I could with Melvin and Trevor. I finished up their plot with Melvin being evil and their rivalry with Laurie and Miles. But don't worry, Laurie and Miles still have more plot ahead of them. Anyway, let me know what you thought.**


	15. Maori or Less

"Last time on the Ridonculous Race! Our bunny hunting bonanza saw Josee and Jacques cheat their way into first place. Devin was in denial about Shelly. That is until Carrie pushed him into a blinding rage. The Rockers and Fashion Blogger briefly clashed. The Magicians and Vegans got in a feud with a kangaroo which ultimately got Melvin and Trevor eliminate. The one magic trick they couldn't do was avoid elimination. Thirteen teams remain and things are heating up. Who's about to get burned? This is The Ridonculous Race!"

Don is in New Zealand and standing next to the Don Box.

"We're back in beautiful New Zealand where the Ice Dancers are on their way to get the first travel tip" Don said.

Josee and Jacques run over to the Don Box.

Team Interview

"Using makeup to disguise a bunny may be unsportsmanlike," Jacques said. "But there technically isn't a rule against it"

"After six horrible finishes we are back in the lead" Josee said.

End Interview

Josee takes the travel tip.

"It says we need to take a train" Josee said.

Cut to Don Standing at a train station.

"Teams must climb a dangerously steep path to this train station," Don said. "Then take a historic train ride through New Zealand's lush mountains all the way up to Decision Junction where their next tips are waiting"

Cut to the teams racing to get to the train station.

"Out of the way man," Rock said. "Rock stars coming through"

"Wait, where are we going?" Spud asked.

"To the train station" Rock said.

Tom and Jen run by Rock and Spud.

"Jen, my legs are killing me" Tom said.

"It's too late to slow down" Jen said.

Cut to later at the train station where the first train is already leaving. Dwayne and Junior run towards the train as it's leaving.

"No! Wait! Stop the train!" Dwayne exclaimed.

"Train one leaves with the Goths, Ice Dancers, Fashion Bloggers, and Rockers" Don explained via voiceover.

"Ah, puss buckets" Junior said.

"Watch your language mister" Dwayne said.

"Sorry" Junior said.

"Want to play a round of go fish?" Dwayne asked. "I got a deck of cards"

"No thanks" Junior said. "I'm gonna listen to some music"

Junior puts on his headphones.

Cut to Dwayne talking to the camera with Junior reading a magazine in the background.

"Ah sure winning a million dollars would be great," Dwayne said. "But I came here for some quality time with Junior. The kid will be off to high school soon. Soon there will be driving lessons, dating, prom, college- Oh no! My little bird's leaving the nest"

Cut to Junior looking at magazines.

"I'll take this Maori tattoo magazine," Junior said to the man selling them. "Also, do you have anything about how to deal with an embarrassing dad?"

The man hands him a magazine.

"I was not expecting that" Junior said.

Meanwhile, at the bottom of the hill the Sisters and Reality TV Pros are running and talking.

"- And I told the producers that Owen wouldn't be able to eat that butter," Noah said to Emma. "I guess throwing up on the contestants is okay but not the host"

"I can't believe they kicked you off for that" Emma said.

"Hey, have you seen that new show: Alligator Fight? Owen and I are trying to audition for it" Noah said.

The Cousins and Geniuses catch up to the Sisters and Reality TV Pros.

"Out of the way!" Bonnie said.

"What Bonnie means is that we'd like to get ahead of you" Mary said.

"Yeah, we're not doing that" Noah said.

"Come on. Please" Jack asked. "You clearly aren't doing anything"

"We clearly are" Emma said.

Team Interview

"I don't like them" Bonnie said.

"Why?" Jack asked.

"Their alliance is a threat to ours" Bonnie explained.

"You know nothing about strategy," Jack said. "How do you know?"

"Don't question me" Bonnie said.

"If it wasn't for Mary and Ellody we probably wouldn't be here" Jack said.

"Shut up" Bonnie said.

End Interview

At the train station, the second train leaves.

"Train number two leaves the station with the Father & Son, Vegans and Surfer Dudes" Don narrated.

Cut to the inside of the train where Junior is reading a tattoo magazine.

"What are you reading pal?" Dwayne asked.

"It's a local tattoo magazine" Junior said.

"That's my boy," Dwayne said. "Soaking up the culture"

Meanwhile, the first train arrives at the station. The five teams on their get off. Josee gets to the Don Box first and takes the travel tip.

"It says we have to "Jump Down" or "Jump Around"... What does that mean?" Josee said.

"I don't know" Jacques said.

Cut to Don standing at a bridge.

"Teams can choose to either jump down off this bridge to catch a local Boari fish with their bare hands" Don explained.

Cut to Don who is now standing on a stage. Two men are on the stage and dancing.

"Or teams can perform a traditional Maori Haka," Don said. "It's a warriors challenge dance that's been designed to terrify the enemy... It works"

Cut to Don standing at the Chill Zone.

"After that it's a footrace to the Chill Zone," Don said. "The last team to meet me here, say it with me, may be cut from the competition... Why did nobody say anything?"

Meanwhile, inside train two the Surfer Dudes are talking to Junior.

"- So then he zips me into a board bag while I'm sleeping and he puts me on the airplane luggage belt" Geoff said.

"That's how we got on the no-fly list," Brody said. "They're only letting us on planes for this show"

"That sounds awesome" Junior said.

The camera pans over to Dwayne sitting by himself.

"Well, it's official," Dwayne said. "Junior would rather be with his cool "Bros" than his uncool old dad"

Laurie and Miles sit down across from Dwayne.

"We couldn't help but overhear you" Miles said.

"Can you help?" Dwayne asked.

"Well when Miles and I became friends my mother was worried about the same thing" Laurie said.

"Yeah, her mom tried way to hard to be like me and Laurie" Miles said.

"That's it! I need to be like those surfers!" Dwayne said.

"Wait, no. That's not what we meant" Miles said.

Dwayne gets up.

"Not now, I need figure out how surfers talk" Dwayne said.

He walks away.

"I think we made things worse" Laurie said.

Miles nods.

Meanwhile, on the third train, the Sisters and Reality TV Pros are sitting down and discussing strategy.

"I have a plan to get us to the finale," Emma said. "As an alliance"

"I really like the way you said alliance," Noah said. "Just wanted to point that out"

"Okay, we need team meetings to address any problems that arise and to discuss Kitty and Owen's behavior" Emma said.

"Hey" Owen said.

"What?" Kitty said.

"I like this plan" Noah said.

"Good," Emma said. "This plan is gonna be great"

The camera pans back to the Cousins and Geniuses.

"Why don't we have a plan like that?" Bonnie asked.

"Well, we can formulate one if you want" Ellody said.

"Yeah, but that sounds like a lot of work" Jack said.

"You have a point Jack" Bonnie said.

"So you're saying hard work doesn't pay off?" Mary said.

"Obviously," Bonnie said. "It's never paid off for me. I just want to get rich and famous by doing as little as possible. That's how most millionaires get rich"

"Your outlook on life depresses me sometimes" Mary said.

"I get that a lot" Bonnie said.

Team Interview

"I think Bonnie and Jack are no longer useful to us," Mary said. "I feel like they've been holding them back"

"They could still have some use to us," Ellody said. "Bonnie helped you out with tennis in Dubai"

"That is true," Mary said. "How about this. Let's agree to break off our alliance with them if they don't do anything helpful by the end of the challenge"

"Good idea" Ellody said.

End Confessional

Elsewhere in the train, Carrie is sitting down while Devin angrily paces around. Sanders and MacArthur are sitting down nearby.

"This is the slowest train in the history of trains," Devin said angrily. "Who's driving this? A sloth! I am sick of having to travel so much"

"You do realize traveling is part of the whole race," Sanders said. "Maybe you should relax and-"

"Don't tell me what to do!" Devin said angrily. "You aren't my girlfriend. I know that because now my girlfriend is dating a tennis player. I hate tennis!"

Cut to Carrie talking to the camera with Devin pacing angrily in the background.

"Getting Devin angry at Shelly might be making things a bit awkward," Carrie said. "But once he's over it I may be able to tell him how I feel"

Cut to Devin angrily standing in a corner. Carrie walks over to him.

"Are you feeling better yet?" Carrie asked him.

"Well I'm too tired out to shout anymore," Devin said. "So that's something"

"Attention passengers this is your conductor," The conductor said over the intercom. "We're about to go uphill so please remain seated"

The train starts to go uphill causing Carrie and Devin to fall over.

Meanwhile, at the dancing stage, Josee and Jacques are watching the two dancing men finish their dance.

"Okay, we think we've got it" Josee said.

"We are ice dancers we know what we're doing" Jacques said.

Josee and Jacques start dancing. They manage to do the dance flawlessly. The two men applaud.

"Try doing it on skates sometime" Josee said. "Then it might be impressive"

"Let's go be champions" Jacques said.

Josee and Jacques run off.

Meanwhile at the bridge, Spud is getting ready to jump.

"Okay, Spud, ready to jump?" Rock asked. "You're all strapped in"

"Yeah!" Spud cheered. "Wait why am I jumping?"

"You're catching a fish" Rock said.

"What kind of fish?" Spud asked.

"It doesn't matter!" Rock said angrily. "Just jump!"

"Wait a second" Spud said.

Rock pushes Spud off the bridge.

Cut to the third train arriving at the station

"Train number three arrives ahead of schedule" Don narrated. "And against all odds"

The Best Friends and Police Cadets get off first.

"Go!" Carrie said.

"Let's hustle!" MacArthur said.

The Cousins and Geniuses get off after them.

"Guys... Slow down..." Jack said.

"Jack! We just started running!" Bonnie said. "Be a man!"

"A more polite way of putting it would be please go faster" Ellody said.

"I don't need your advice" Bonnie said.

The Reality TV Pros and Sister get off the train last.

"I can't wait to post my review of that train online" Noah joked. "Got a death wish: This is the train for you"

"Good one" Emma said.

The teams run over to the Don Box and take their travel tips.

"I say we jump down" Noah said.

"I say jump around" Kitty said.

"Let's have a team meeting" Emma said.

Meanwhile at the Chill Zone Josee and Jacques arrive first.

"Where is everybody?" Josee asked.

"Hello? Don?!" Jacques called.

Don runs over to Josee and Jacques. He has a shaving cream on his face.

"What are you doing here?" Don asked. "Did you skip the challenge?"

"We won it," Josee said. "I take it we're first then?"

"Yes, yes, yes, congratulations," Don said. "I need to go finish shaving"

Back at the bridge, Spud gets back up from the water.

"Did you get a fish?" Rock asked.

"What?" Spud asked. "Oh, no man. I forgot"

"How?" Rock asked.

"I don't know" Spud said.

The Fashion Bloggers and Police Cadets get over to the bridge.

"Hey, can we jump off this bridge?" Tom asked.

"Yeah," Sanders said. "We kind of need a fish"

"Come on man, just let Spud jump one more time" Rock pleaded.

"No, we are a lot of things, but we aren't pushovers" Jen said.

Sanders takes the foot straps from Spud, and Tom takes the other bungee cord off the ground. MacArthur takes the bungee cord from Sanders and straps it to her foot.

"Wait, why do I have to do this?" Sanders asked.

"Come on, you owned every obstacle course at the academy" MacArthur said.

"That doesn't mean I should be the one to do it" Sanders said.

"Sure it does" MacArthur said.

"Oh whatever, you're going to wear me down eventually" Sanders said.

"There we go" MacArthur said.

MacArthur pushes her partner off the bridge.

The camera pans a bit to the left to show Tom and Jen deciding who should jump.

"Well, I really don't feel like it," Jen said. "Those fish look very dangerous"

"That's why I don't want to jump either" Tom said.

"How about we do Rock, Paper, Scissors" Jen suggested.

"Deal" Tom said.

Back at the train station the Sisters and Reality TV Pros are arguing over which challenge to do.

"Come on, we both have great dance moves" Kitty said.

"Yes, but I've always wanted to try bungee jumping" Noah said.

The last train stops at the station.

"Fine, we'll go bungee jump" Kitty said.

"Thanks sis" Emma said.

The Sisters and Reality TV Pros leave.

"Hurry dude, the Don Box is over there!" Brody said.

The Surfer Dudes, Father & Son, and Vegans make it to the next Don Box and take the travel tips.

"Let's go bungee jumping dude" Brody said.

"Totally" Geoff said.

"Let's dance" Laurie said.

"Sure" Miles said.

"What do you think we should do dad?" Junior asked.

"Just take it easy man," Dwayne said, attempting to be cool. "Unwindulax yourself"

"What happened to you?" Junior asked.

"Let's jet Brobama," Dwayne said. "Fist bump!"

Dwayne holds out his hand and waits for a fist bump.

Cut to Junior talking to the camera while reading the second magazine from the stand. Dwayne attempts to "Jive" in the background.

"My dad's trying to be cool," Junior said. "Maybe I could use this"

Cut back to Dwayne holding out his fist. Junior reluctantly fist bumps him.

"You're awesome dad..." Junior said awkwardly. "And I value your opinion"

"You do!" Dwayne said in surprise. "I mean... Right on!"

"But if most teams chose bungee jumping there's probably a wait," Junior said. "Do you think it's worth..."

Junior looks at the magazine.

"Exercising another option" Junior read.

"Okay," Dwayne said. "Let's rock it!"

Meanwhile the Cousins and Geniuses finish watching the two dancers perform.

"We aren't doing that" Bonnie said.

"Yeah, I agree," Jack said. "Too much moving"

"What?!" Mary said. "It's not that hard"

"Mary's right," Ellody said. "It's very simple. You see we just-"

"I don't want to hear any of your Star Trek-esque techno speak" Bonnie said.

"So why did you want to be in an alliance in the first place?" Ellody asked.

"I just wanted help in the catacombs in Paris," Bonnie said. "It was Jack's idea"

"Everyone, let's just all calm down," Mary said. "We'll just switch to the other challenge. Okay?"

"Sure" Jack said.

Meanwhile, Brody is preparing to jump.

"Our lives are so awesome bro" Geoff said.

"I know," Brody said. "This is gonna be sick"

Brody jumps off the bridge.

"I feel like I forgot something" Geoff said.

"Geoff! I forgot the bungee cord!" Brody called up.

"Well crap..." Geoff said.

Meanwhile Rock is getting ready to jump a second time.

"Okay, Spud, here I go" Rock said.

"Hey man, let me know if that fish from Free Willy is there" Spud said.

"That was a whale, Spud" Rock said.

Tom walks up next to Rock and straps into the bungee cord next to him.

"Okay, I'm ready to jump" Tom said.

"Hey! I was here first" Rock said.

"Yes, but you already jumped," Tom said. "Plus Jen and I just had an intense game of Rock, Paper, Scissors to decide who jumped"

"I'm not waiting" Rock said.

"Well neither am I" Tom said.

Rock and Tom jump off the bridge at the same time.

"Something tells me that was a bad idea" Jen said.

"Me too" Spud said.

Tom and Rock get their bungee cords tangled up.

"Help!" Tom exclaimed.

"I knew this would happen..." Rock said.

Team Interview

"Those two are getting on my nerves" Rock said.

"For two girly fashion bloggers they are surprisingly pushy" Spud said.

End Interview

The Sisters and Reality TV Pros are waiting their turn.

"Come, on, how long will this take" Kitty said.

"Don't worry Kitty" Emma said. "We can just pass the time by talking"

"Plus we aren't that far behind" Noah added. "We just need to wait for Tom and Rock to get untangled"

The Geniuses and Cousins walk up to the bridge and notice the long wait.

"I was not expecting this line" Bonnie said.

"Let's go back" Jack said.

"Good plan" Bonnie said.

"You have got to be kidding me?!" Mary said angrily. "We just got here"

"Yeah, but that other challenge looks pretty good right about now" Bonnie said.

"Fine, we'll switch, again" Ellody said. "But no taking this back"

"Promise" Bonnie said.

The Cousins and Geniuses leave.

The camera pans over to Crimson and Ennui preparing to jump.

"Are you sure my makeup won't get ruined?" Crimson asked.

"I bought water resistant makeup after the incident in Finland" Ennui said.

"Good," Crimson said. "Wish me luck"

Crimson jumps off the bridge. She grabs a fish and comes back up.

"Let's go" Crimson said.

"Right" Ennui said.

After they leave Sanders and MacArthur walk over to the edge of the bridge. Sanders straps the bungee cord to her foot.

"Let's do this!" MacArthur said.

MacArthur pushes her partner off the bridge. Sanders grabs a fish. On the way up the fish tries to bite her. She nearly drops it but manages to hold on only to have the fish slap her with its tail. Sanders gets back up.

"Let's get out of here" MacArthur said.

"Got it" Sanders said.

Sanders and MacArthur leave. Laurie and Miles get over to the bungee cord once the Police Cadets leave.

"Laurie, I think you should jump," Miles said. "I don't want to hurt any fish"

"Why would I be okay with it?" Laurie asked.

"Well you eat meat now" Miles said.

"Because it is delicious!" Laurie exclaimed.

"Just jump" Miles said.

"Got it, sorry" Laurie said.

Meanwhile Carrie is dancing badly while Devin paces around angrily.

"Am I doing it right?" Carrie asked.

The two men shake their heads in disapproval.

"Okay everyone! Let's do this!" Devin said angrily.

"Devin, I think we'll have to start again," Carrie said. "But your enthusiasm is appreciated"

"What?!" Devin said angrily. "What's wrong! Is it me?!"

Devin walks over to the two dancers.

"Well?! Don't just stand there! Do you have a problem with me?!" Devin shouted.

"N-no..." One of the dancers said nervously. "In fact you can go right now"

"I hate how good this feels!" Devin yelled.

"Okay, Devin, let's go" Carrie said.

Carrie and Devin walk off. Once they leave the Geniuses and Cousins walk up to the dancers.

"Okay, we're back" Bonnie said.

Meanwhile at the Chill Zone Don is waiting for the other teams. Carrie and Devin run over to the Chill Zone.

"Carrie, Devin, you get second place!" Don announced.

"I hate that I did so well!" Devin exclaimed.

Sanders and MacArthur make it to the Chill Zone next.

"Third!" Don announced.

"I can live with that" Sanders said.

Crimson and Ennui make it there next.

"Fourth!" Don said.

"I don't care" Ennui said.

The camera pans over to Josee and Jacques relaxing in a lawn chair and reading a magazine.

"Hello, sweaty people," Josee said mockingly. "We were wondering when you would finally arrive"

Team Interview

"Coming in first mean you get the royal treatment," Josee said. "Free snacks, ice tea, foot rubs-"

"I didn't get a foot rub" Jacques said.

Second Interview

"It's great that we went from almost last to second," Carrie said. "Sure Devin is a bit... Scary. But it's worth it"

"I hate everything!" Devin yelled

End Interview

Geoff and Brody run up to Don.

"Fifth!" Don announced.

"Awesome!" Brody said.

Laurie and Miles make it there next.

Sixth!" Don announced.

"We'll take what we can get" Laurie said.

The Rockers and Fashion Bloggers run up to the Chill Zone.

"Seventh and Eighth!" Don said.

The Cousins and Geniuses run over to Don.

"Not so fast," Don said. "You switched challenges twice"

"Come on," Bonnie said. "Maybe you could let this one slide"

"Sorry, you both get penalties" Don said.

"How long will this penalty be for?" Ellody asked.

"Twenty minutes for every time you switched. Or forty minutes overall" Don said.

"God damn it" Bonnie said.

"Sorry guys" Jack said.

"It's not you fault Jack" Mary said.

Meanwhile Dwayne and Junior are trying to do the dance. Halfway through dancing, Dwayne starts breakdancing.

"Dad, what are you doing?" Junior asked.

"You know, just broifying the dance," Dwayne said. "Adding some jive juice, know what I mean?"

"Oh no..." Junior said.

Cut to Junior talking to the camera with Dwayne moonwalking in the background.

"I've created a monster. And it's so lame" Junior said.

Junior looks at the magazine.

"Hang on... I think I've got something" Junior said.

Meanwhile Noah is preparing to jump. Emma walks over to Noah.

"Noah, wait," Emma said. "I think we should jump at the same time. Not only would it save a lot of time but it would be super romantic"

"It sounds a bit risky," Noah said. "Rock and Tom got real tangled up when they did it"

"Come on, just trust me" Emma said.

"Alright, fine" Noah said.

"Great. You won't regret this" Emma said.

Emma straps the other bungee cord onto her leg.

"Let's go" Emma said.

Emma and Noah jump off the bridge.

Meanwhile Junior and Dwayne are dancing again. Dwayne starts to moonwalk halfway through the dance.

"Dad! Please stop" Junior said.

"But my moves are so cool" Dwayne said.

"No, they aren't! They're so lame" Junior said.

"Oh, but they're cool?" Dwayne asked, gesturing to the two dancers.

"They're muscular men with face tattoos," Junior said. "So they're cool"

"Yeah," Dwayne said. "But I-"

"Dad! You are not cool" Junior said.

"What..." Dwayne said.

"Dad, I'm sorry" Junior said.

"Let's just get this over with" Dwayne said.

Meanwhile at the Chill Zone Emma and Kitty make it there.

"Ninth!" Don announced.

"Yes!" Emma said. "I am still in this"

Noah and Owen make it to the Chill Zone next.

"Tenth!" Don said.

"That's not so bad" Owen said.

Dwayne and Junior make it there next.

"Eleventh!" Don announced.

"We did it!" Junior said.

Junior hugs his dad.

"Good job son," Dwayne said. "We make a good team"

Team Interview

"I'm sorry I tried too hard" Dwayne said.

"It's fine" Junior said.

Junior takes out the magazine.

"It says here that it's normal for me to pull away a little bit" Junior read. "It doesn't mean you're not cool... Ish"

"I'm coolish!?" Dwayne said. "I'll take it"

End Interview

Junior is reading the Maori tattoo magazine. Dwayne walks over to his son. He now has a tattoo on his chin.

"Hey sport, what do you think of me now?" Dwayne asked.

"Wow, that is so cool" Junior said.

"Thank you" Dwayne said.

Junior glances at his magazine and a sudden look of realization sweeps over his face.

"Um... Dad" Junior said.

"What?" Dwayne asked.

"This magazine says that the tattoo you have is for woman" Junior said.

"Say what now..." Dwayne said.

The camera pans over to the Cousins and Geniuses are waiting.

"Hey, if either of us gets eliminated I just want you all to know something" Jack said.

"What is that?" Mary said.

"I'm sorry for any trouble me or Bonnie caused you" Jack said.

"You don't have to apologize. It was mostly Bonnie" Ellody said.

"We can all stay friends right?" Bonnie asked.

Mary and Ellody stay silent.

"Oh come on," Bonnie said. "You are great people and Jack really likes you"

"Yeah, I'll even go see you at the Noble Prize Awards" Jack said.

"It's pronounced Nobel" Mary said.

"Yeah, that thing" Jack said.

"Mary, Ellody, I just want to let you know I'm sorry" Bonnie said.

"What?" Mary said. "You're never sorry"

"Cousins, Geniuses, your time is up!" Don announced.

Bonnie immediately pushes Mary and Ellody over and runs into the Chill Zone with Jack.

"Bonnie, Jack, you are in twelfth!" Don said.

"Once again, I am sorry" Bonnie said.

Don walks over to Mary and Ellody.

"Mary, Ellody, you are eliminated" Don said.

"We gathered" Ellody said.

Jack walks over to them.

"Sorry about all this. I hope we can stay in touch" Jack said. "Oh, and good luck winning the Noble Prize"

"It's pronounced Nobel" Mary said.

"Whatever" Jack said.

Clips of Mary and Ellody play while they narrate over them.

"We really should have ended our alliance with them while we had the chance" Ellody said over a clip of Mary getting hit in the face with a tennis ball in Dubai.

"Agreed. But I suppose I did learn that brains aren't always the answer" Mary said as a clip of Ellody getting electrocuted by the boat in the Mediterranean.

"I honestly think we learned a lot here" Ellody said over a clip of Mary handing some of her calculations to Bonnie.

"Me too" Mary said as the footage switched to them walking away.

"It's still terrible that Bonnie knocked us out with such a cheap move" Ellody said.

"Oh, yes definitely," Mary said. "I really hope she doesn't win"

* * *

 **This was a fun chapter to write. As you may have noticed I toned down everything about Noah and Emma in this episode. This is because Emma and Noah getting super distracted in canon felt really out of character. Also, small side note, I just wanted to let you know that the idea for the rivalry between the Rockers and Fashion Bloggers came from Booboojohnson1. As for the elimination, I got rid of Mary and Ellody because I wanted to wrap up their plot with Bonnie and Jack. Please let me know what you thought about the chapter.**


	16. Little Bull on the Prairie

"Last time on the Ridonculous Race! New Zealand took our remaining teams on a roller coaster on a ride of highs and lows. Dwayne tried to impress his son with a tattoo... That turned out to be for women. Devin went from super sad to super mad and pulled the best friends up to second place. The Fashion Bloggers and Rockers started to realize that they really didn't care for each other all that much. And speaking of realizations Mary and Ellody realized that they didn't need Jack and Bonnie. Too bad they still got sent home. Somebody's bound to be sent home today. Who will it be? Find out on, The Ridonculous Race!"

Don is at the Don Box in New Zealand.

"Yesterday's Chill Zone is today's starting line" Don said. "First to depart are the king and queen of comebacks: Josee and Jacques"

Josee and Jacques walk up to Don.

 **Team Interview**

"Two wins in a row, five wins overall" Jacques declared. "We're not just back. We're on fire!"

"And the competition is about to get burned!" Josee said.

 **End Interview**

Josee takes a travel tip.

"It says to go to Head-Smashed-In Buffalo Jump" Josee read.

"Is that a place or a threat?" Jacques asked.

Cut to a background of the Canadian flag with a postcard of the Alberta mountain range.

"It's actually a bit of both" Don narrated. "It's located here along the foothills of the rocky mountains in Alberta Canada. Head-Smashed-In was going to be called Concussion Valley... But that name was already taken by some jerks in Arizona"

Cut to Don standing by a Don Box in Alberta.

"Team must come here to Lethbridge Alberta to receive their next travel tip" Don said.

Back in New Zealand, Carrie and Devin receive their next travel tip.

"Yes! Let's do this!" Devin exclaimed.

Cut to Carrie and Devin talking to the camera with a tree in the background.

"I had a few "Minor outbursts" during the last challenge" Devin said.

"You weren't that bad" Carrie said.

"Don't worry, the rage has left the Devin" Devin said.

"Oh thank God" Carrie said.

"I'm not angry at Shelly anymore" Devin said. "In fact-"

Devin runs up to the camera and grabs it.

"I want you back baby! And I'll do anything to prove it!" Devin yelled. "I'll climb to the top of a tree!"

Devin rushes over to the tree and starts to climb it.

"And now he's in the third stage of his breakup" Carrie said. "Bargaining"

Cut to Geoff and Brody receiving their travel tip.

"Dude, we're going to a dude ranch" Geoff said.

"And we're dudes!" Brody said.

"We can't lose" Geoff said.

Cut to later where several of the teams are getting into their cabs.

"While most teams are catching a taxi to the airport one team doesn't have as much luck" Don narrated.

"Taxi!" Junior yelled.

A cab pulls up to the curb. The driver opens the door and notices Dwayne's new tattoo. He then starts laughing at it.

"If you stop laughing I'll pay you double" Dwayne said.

"Deal" The driver said.

Dwayne and Junior get in the taxi.

 **Team Interview**

"Dad, your new tattoo isn't helping us" Junior said.

"This tattoo may be for women. But I will wear it with manly pride" Dwayne said. "... Until we win the million and I can afford tattoo removal surgery"

 **End Interview**

Tom and Jen are waiting for their taxi.

"Hey, taxi!" Tom shouted.

A taxi pulls up to the curb.

"Thanks a lot" Jen said.

Rock and Spud run over to the cab.

"Hey can we tag along" Rock asked.

"Yeah man, all the cabs go past us" Spud said.

"Not really" Jen said.

Cut to later where Rock and Spud have gotten in the taxi with Tom and Jen.

"What part of "Not really" didn't you understand?" Jen asked.

"I don't understand most things" Spud said.

 **Team Interview**

"The last time I was this mad with someone it was when my hairdresser messed up my perfect hair" Tom said.

"Agreed" Jen said. "Those two Rockers are getting annoying"

 **Second Interview**

"I think those fashion dudes are our enemies now?" Rock said.

"Whoa, I've never had an enemy" Spud said. "That's pretty cool"

 **End Interview**

A plane at the New Zealand airport is seen taking off.

"Most of the teams made it on the first flight" Don narrated. "But the Cousins, Father & Son, Sisters, and Reality TV Pros have to wait half an hour for the next plane to Alberta... But all that waiting is boring so let's time lapse"

Cut to later where the second flight is in the air. Inside the plane, Jack is talking with his cousin.

"Hey Bonnie, do you feel guilty about getting Mary and Ellody eliminated" Jack asked. "Maybe you should ask yourself what Jesus would do"

"He would have cheated with his god-like powers" Bonnie said. "So I don't feel guilty. We're fine on our own anyway"

The camera pans back to Dwayne and Junior.

"You know we've gotten a lot closer thanks to this race" Dwayne said. "You even called me cool"

"That was before I found out your tattoo was for girls" Junior said.

"You still said it" Dwayne said. "Even if we get cut from the race I'll still be happy"

"Dad don't jinx us" Junior said.

"Don't believe in that silly superstition" Dwayne said.

"Attention folks this is your pilot" The pilot said over the speaker system. "A storm over Montana has forced us to slow down"

Junior glares at his dad.

"I'm sure the other flight was delayed too" Dwayne said.

"Just to clarify it's just a freak storm that only affects our plane" The pilot said.

"Oh come on!" Emma shouted from off screen.

Cut to the first flight landing in Alberta.

"Flight one has made its landing" Don narrated. "They will now have to drive a pickup truck into the wild west"

Cut to Sanders and MacArthur driving their pickup truck.

"So far so good" MacArthur said. "We are gonna own this challenge"

Suddenly another truck rams into them. Sanders and MacArthur look behind them to see Josee and Jacques. The Ice Dancers drive past them.

"Eat our dust you donut lovers!" Josee yelled.

MacArthur accidentally drives over a rock and punctures a tire.

"Uh oh" MacArthur said.

MacArthur hands sanders a roll of duct tape.

"I need you to climb out and patch up the tire" MacArthur said.

"But we're still moving!" Sanders said. "That's insane!"

"Fine" MacArthur said. "New plan!"

MacArthur hits the gas pedal and speeds up. They crash into Jacques and Josee's pickup truck and end up going off a cliff.

 **Team Interview**

"What can I say" MacArthur said. "Mess with the bull, you get the horn"

 **End Confessional**

Brody and Geoff drive right past the cliff the Ice Dancers and Cadets drove off.

"Huh, I could have sworn there were people just ahead of us" Geoff said.

"Two possibilities bro" Brody said. "Either the other teams were abducted by aliens, or... Nah, it's gotta be aliens"

Meanwhile in Carrie and Devin's truck.

"It's simple Carrie" Devin said, seeming a bit unhinged. "If I come home a winner Shelly will totally take me back! Why won't this truck go any faster?!"

"You have to put it in drive" Carrie said.

"Oh... Thank you" Devin said.

Cut to flight two landing and the teams getting off.

"Flight two has landed a full hour after the first one" Don narrated. "The teams are racing to not be eliminated. You can tell by the look of terror on their face. It's reality TV gold"

Cut to Owen driving his team's car with Noah in the passenger seat.

"Owen let me drive" Noah said. "I'm the one with the actual license"

"We're already moving" Owen said. "I don't want to fall behind. Besides it's just a straight road, what's the worse that could happen?"

A Canadian goose flies into the windshield.

"How about that?" Noah said.

"It was a coincidence that I was the one driving when it hit" Owen said.

A rabbit suddenly hits the windshield.

"Okay, that one was my fault" Owen said. "But it's too late to stop driving"

"Just try not to hit anything else" Noah said.

A pig lands on the car hood.

"How did that one even get up here!" Owen exclaimed.

Meanwhile, Geoff and Brody are the first ones to make it to the Don Box at the farm.

"All right! Nobody's here" Brody said. "Thanks, alien dudes"

"Yeah" Geoff said.

Geoff takes the travel tips.

"Dude, it says we have to eat for this challenge" Geoff said.

Cut to Don in a kitchen. Next to him is a large pot of pork and beans.

"In this All-In teams must work together to eat an entire pot of pork and beans" Don explained. "At the bottom of the pot is their next travel tip"

Cut to Geoff and Brody in the farm house standing over a pot of beans.

"Dude, my favourite meal to snack on is totally pork and beans" Brody said.

"Me too" Geoff said.

Cut to Geoff talking to the camera with Brody eating in the background.

"I can scarf down most things" Geoff said. "And Brody's got an iron stomach and the taste buds of a dude with no taste buds. We're pretty good"

Cut back to the farm house. Laurie and Miles enter the farm house.

"Cool, we've got the lead" Miles said.

"Come on let's go" Laurie said.

Laurie and Miles walk over to a pot of pork and beans. Miles sniffs the pot.

"Wait... It smells like there's meat in there!" Miles exclaimed.

Miles' eye twitches.

"Are you okay?" Laurie asked

"Fine..." Miles said.

Her eye twitches again.

 **Team Interview**

"I can't eat meat... I mean I can" Miles said. "I just don't consider it ethical... But you can, right Laurie?"

"Um... I guess so" Laurie said. "But we're both supposed to eat"

"Aw nuts..." Miles said.

 **End Interview**

Laurie and Miles are sitting down at their table. Laurie seems to be enjoying the meal but Miles is having a hard time even putting the spoon near her mouth.

"Ew... I can't do this" Miles said. "The idea of eating a dead animal is just too gross"

"Oh come on" Laurie said. "They're delicious. Besides, I'm sure they were killed humanely"

"I hope so" Miles said.

Crimson and Ennui enter the farm house and sit down at a table.

"Ugh..." Crimson said.

 **Team Interview**

"This place reminds me of my grandmothers farm house" Crimson said. "I spent a lot of summers there"

 **End Interview**

Meanwhile, outside the farm house, Carrie and Devin park their car and get out.

"We're fourth!" Devin exclaimed once he noticed the other cars. "Okay, don't panic"

There is a brief awkward pause.

"Let's run as fast as we can!" Devin yelled in a panicked tone.

Devin quickly runs away. Carrie awkwardly looks at the camera.

"At least he's not crying..." Carrie said.

Back inside the farm house, Laurie is eating the pot of pork and beans without any help from Miles.

"Um... Not to be pushy but do you think you could speed up?" Miles asked.

"This is an All-In challenge" Laurie said. "You're supposed to help"

"I know that" Miles said. "Let me just try and eat this"

Miles moves the spoonful of beans towards her mouth. She gags and then drops the spoon on the ground.

"Come on Miles" Laurie said. "This isn't nearly as bad as the food from Iceland. At least this stuff actually tastes good"

"I'm trying my best here" Miles said.

Dwayne and Junior enter the farm house and sit down at a table.

"Check it out Junior" Dwayne said. "We've really climbed up the ladder"

A woman puts down a pot of pork and beans in front of them.

"Say, isn't that tattoo meant for ladies?" The woman asked.

"That settles it!" Dwayne yelled. "I need a marker and a mirror"

"Later dad" Junior said. "We need to eat"

"Relax kiddo it's a huge pot" Dwayne said. "Nobody's gonna finish this for quite a-"

"Done!" Geoff shouted from off screen.

The camera pans to Geoff and Brody. Geoff takes the travel tip from the bottom of the pot.

"It says that whoever isn't holding the tip has to ride a mechanical bull" Geoff said.

"This place has a mechanical bull!" Brody exclaimed.

Cut to Don standing next to a dangerous looking mechanical bull.

"Behold: The Bull Buster 3000!" Don said. "The most dangerous bull in the world. Riders must stay on the bull for a full eight seconds. Once they complete this challenge it's out the door, down a path, and over to the Chill Zone"

Cut to Don at the Chill Zone.

"Last team to arrive may be out of the race" Don said.

Cut to Brody getting onto the mechanical bull. The bull starts up and Brody is immediately thrown off of it.

"How long was that..." Brody said.

"Less than one second" Geoff said.

Outside the farm house, the Police Cadet and Ice Dancers run up to the Don Box. They look visibly shaken up by the crash and Jacques is still holding the steering wheel of his truck.

"Let's never do that again" Sanders said.

"Good idea" MacArthur said.

Both teams take their travel tips then head inside the farm house. After that, Tom and Jen park their truck.

"We're a bit behind but still, I think we're good" Tom said.

Another truck rams into them. Rock and Spud get out of the truck.

"Sorry man, was that us?" Spud asked.

"Yes" Tom said.

"But it can't get worse" Jen said.

A truck crashes into Rock and Spud's truck. Jack and Bonnie get out of the truck.

"Whoops... Sorry guys" Jack said.

"Not really" Bonnie said.

"Yes you are" Jack said.

"Look let's just be glad that was the last car" Tom said.

"You just jinxed it" Jen said.

Another truck speeds towards the other trucks but stops just short of hitting Jack and Bonnie's truck. Emma and Kitty get out.

"Next time I'm driving" Emma said. "I've had my license longer than you have"

"Fair point" Kitty said.

"Phew" Tom said. "Looks like the rule of three doesn't work in real life"

"Look out!" Rock exclaimed.

Suddenly a car covered in all sorts of animals speeds towards the crowd of people now gathered outside the farm house. Everyone scatters and the truck knocks over to Don Box and sends travel tips flying everywhere. Owen and Noah exit the truck.

"Something tells me we're in trouble for this" Noah said.

Inside the farm house, Sanders and MacArthur sit down at their table. A woman puts down a pot of beans for them.

"A disgusting amount of pork and beans..." MacArthur observed. "For free!"

MacArthur pulls the pot of beans towards her and starts eating them as fast as she can.

"Can I have a few..." Sanders asked nervously.

"Get your own pot!" MacArthur yelled.

 **Team Interview**

"Someone here has a bit of a sharing issue" Sanders said.

"You're right" MacArthur said. "And I forgive you"

 **End Interview**

Josee and Jacques look at their pot of beans and cringe.

"I am not going to like this" Josee said.

Cut to Josee and Jacques talking to the camera while the other teams eat in the background.

"There are worse things you could be forced to choke down than beans and pork" Jacques said.

"Like a bronze medal" Josee said.

Cut to Tom and Jen reluctantly eating their pork and beans.

"Ugh, this is destroying my diet" Jen said.

"Mine too" Tom said.

Tom notices Rock and Spud eating at the table next to them and having a great time.

"Aw man Spud, this stuff is the best" Rock said.

"I know" Spud said. "I could eat this stuff all day"

"How are those rock stars able to eat so fast?" Tom asked his partner.

"Well one of Spud's a bottomless pit and I just really like beans" Rock said.

"We weren't asking you directly" Jen said.

"Oh... Wait who are you?" Spud asked.

"I'm Tom and this is my partner Jen" Tom said. "Perhaps you've heard of our moderately successful fashion blog"

"We've never really been into fashion" Rock said.

"That's obvious" Jen remarked.

"Hey, what's that supposed to mean?" Spud asked.

"Exactly what it sounds like" Tom said.

"Rock, what does it sound like? I couldn't understand them" Spud said.

"They're implying we don't have a good taste in fashion" Rock said.

"Oh... Hey that's mean!" Spud said.

 **Team Interview**

"Spud isn't very bright is he?" Jen said.

"No, I think he may have brain damage" Tom said. "But I'm not a doctor"

 **Second Interview**

"Spud isn't very bright" Rock said.

"My doctor says I might have brain damage" Spud said.

 **End Interview**

Bonnie is eating her team's pot of pork and beans while Jack sort of sits back.

"Jack, give me a hand here" Bonnie said.

"You know, I really don't feel like it" Jack said.

"Are you kidding me?" Bonnie said. "You've had like three bites. Just help me more"

"Yeah but, I kind of think that hard work doesn't pay off" Jack said.

Cut to Jack talking to the camera with Bonnie eating the pot of pork and beans in the background.

"I've decided to give Bonnie and taste of her own medicine" Jack said. "She doesn't really deserve to win by this point. Especially after what she did to Mary and Ellody. Is what I'm doing annoying? Yes it is. Does Bonnie deserve it? Absolutely"

Cut to Brody getting back on the mechanical bull.

"Okay... Seventeenth time's the charm" Brody said.

The mechanical bull turns on. Brody holds on for about three seconds before being thrown from the bull. Brody climbs back up on the bull.

"Let me try that again..." Brody said weakly.

The camera pans to Geoff who turns to the camera to talk.

"Brody isn't doing too hot" Geoff said. "But nobody else has gone so we're still golden"

"Incoming bro!" Brody shouted from off screen.

Brody is thrown from the bull and collides with Geoff.

Back with Laurie and Miles, their pot of pork and beans is almost empty.

"Just take a small spoonful Miles" Laurie urged. "If you don't we'll get a penalty"

"I know that Laurie" Miles said.

Miles takes her spoon and moves it closer to her mouth. She then gags and drops the spoon.

"I'm sorry, I can't do it" Miles said.

"There was barely any meat in that bite" Laurie said.

"I know... I still don't like it" Miles said.

"Miles in Brazil you told me something" Laurie said. "You said that if we're going to use the money to help the animals of the world then maybe a few can get hurt"

"I guess you sort of a have a point..." Miles said.

Miles takes her spoon and reluctantly eats a spoonful of beans and pork.

"Hey, this isn't so bad" Miles said. "I still feel guilty, but it's not so bad"

Miles takes a few more bites of pork and beans.

 **Team Interview**

"Are you going to be okay Miles?" Laurie asked.

"Yeah... I'm okay" Miles said. "I'm sure those pigs I ate are in animal Heavan"

"Aren't you an Atheist?" Laurie asked.

"Just let me think the pigs I ate are happy" Miles said.

"Right, sorry" Laurie said.

 **End Interview**

Rock and Spud finish eating their pot of beans. Rock takes the travel tip.

"Let's see, whoever isn't holding this has to... Uh oh" Rock said.

"What?" Spud said.

"You have to ride a mechanical bull" Rock said.

"Cool!" Spud said. "This is gonna be sweet!"

Brody suddenly flies over Rock and Spud's table.

"Stupid bull..." Brody muttered weakly.

"Oh... Well this is gonna suck" Spud said.

The camera pans to Tom and Jen finishing their pot of pork and beans.

"Done" Tom said.

"Which one of us should do the next challenge?" Jen asked. "I heard Rock and Spud say that whoever doesn't grab the travel tip has to do it"

"Well neither of us are physically strong and we don't want to ruin our clothes" Tom said. "I think this is what we call a losing situation"

"I'll just take it then" Jen said.

"No wait!" Tom exclaimed.

Jen grabs the travel tip.

"Aw man, I was not looking forward to that mechanical bull" Tom said.

The camera pans to Jack and Bonnie. Bonnie's still the only one doing the eating.

"Jack, I swear to God you are being so lazy and difficult right now" Bonnie said.

"I know Bonnie, I know" Jack said.

The camera pans to Carrie and Devin finishing their pot of pork and beans. Carrie takes the travel tip.

"What do we have to do next?" Devin asked.

"Um... I don't think you'll like it" Carrie said. "You have to ride a mechanical bull"

"Oh boy... This doesn't look good" Devin said.

Meanwhile, with the mechanical bull, Brody looks very weeks and is holding on to Geoff for support.

"Bro, the other teams are catching up" Brody said.

"Don't worry dude, you've got this" Geoff said.

"Yeah, I can do this" Brody said.

Brody climbs up on to the bull only to have it buck him off immedietly.

Back the other teams, MacArthur seems to be keeping all the pork and beans to herself. Sanders starts to reach for the pot only to have her hand slapped away.

"MacArthur, it's an All-In we both need to eat" Sanders said.

"You want some? Then prove it" MacArthur said.

"Prove it?" Sanders said. "What does that even- Hey is that guy stealing from the cash register"

MacArthur quickly turns around. Sanders takes the pot of pork and beans while her partner is distracted and starts eating.

"Well played partner" MacArthur said.

Over with the mechanical bull, Devin is trying to stay on.

"Come on! I can do this" Devin said.

Devin is thrown from the bull and lands face first on the floor.

Geoff and Brody walk over to the Bull.

"See, don't feel bad dude" Geoff said. "That bull is not beatable... Like, at all"

Spud and Tom walk over to the bull and both try to climb on it at the same time.

"Let me up there" Tom said. "I was here first"

"Pretty sure I was here first man" Spud said.

"Just let me up" Tom said.

"Come on man" Spud said. "Let's share or whatever"

The bull bucks them both off.

"Losers" Crimson said.

Crimson climbs up on to the bull. The bull starts up and Crimson doesn't fall off. The eight seconds pass and then she gets off.

"Ennnui, Loki, let's go" Crimson said.

 **Team Interview**

"Riding mechanical bulls is easier than riding real ones" Crimson said.

Ennui and Loki look at her.

"I don't want to talk about it" Crimson said.

 **End Interview**

Bonnie finishes eating the pot of beans.

"Thanks for all the help" Bonnie said sarcatically.

"No problem" Jack said.

Jack takes the travel tip.

"Oh, look at that, you have to ride a mechanical bull" Jack said.

Cut to Bonnie talking to the camera with Jack sitting at their table in the background.

"I know what he's trying to do" Bonnie said. "Well I'm not letting him get to me"

Cut to Brody getting closer to the bull.

"I'd hang my hat now but I don't have one" Brody said.

"Wait bro, wear my lucky hat" Geoff said. "Wear it with pride and get ready to seriously rock this"

"Thanks dude" Brody said.

Brody puts on Geoffs hat and climbs up on the bull. The bull starts rocking but Brody is able to stay on.

"Dude! This totally works!" Brody exclaimed.

The clock reaches eight seconds and Brody gets off the bull.

"I made it!" Brody exclaimed.

Meanwhile, Don is waiting for teams at the Chill Zone.

"Man, Alberta is kind of boring" Don commented. "Why did we come here?"

"The producers said we needed to have at least two episodes take place in Canada" A man from offscreen said.

"Thanks Larry" Don said.

Geoff and Brody run up to Don.

"First place!" Don anounced. "Congratulations"

Geoff hugs Brody and he hugs his friend back.

"Don dude, get in here" Brody said.

"No thanks" Don said. "I don't do emotion"

Brody grabs Don and pulls him into a group hug. Don looks uncomfortable.

"Stop" Don said flatly.

Back at the farm house Devin is riding the bull.

"Whoa, this is bad" Devin said.

Devin manages to hold on to the bull for eight seconds. Devin gets off.

"Thank God that's over" Devin said.

"Let's go" Carrie said.

Carrie and Devin leave.

"You're up Spud" Rock said.

"Okay" Spud said.

Spud climbs up on the bull. He holds on tight and stays on for the eight seconds.

"Yeah! I did It" Spud cheered.

"Let's go Spud" Rock said.

Rock and Spud said.

"Oh come on" Jen said.

"Leave this to the professionals" Tom said.

"Remember to hold on to the bull right" Jen said.

"I will" Tom said.

Tom climbs on to the bull and is able to hold on for two seconds only to be thrown off the bull. Tom flies over Dwayne and Junior who are just finishing their beans and pork.

"Grab that travel tip for me" Dwayne said to Junior.

 **Team Interview**

"I still don't believe in jinxes but I'm not risking Junior getting hurt" Dwayne said.

"Thanks dad" Junior said.

 **End Interview**

Bonnie gets up on the bull.

"Okay, I've got this" Bonnie said.

"I don't care" Jack said.

"Screw you!" Bonnie yelled.

While Bonnie is distracted the bull bucks her off and she hits a nearby wall.

Back at the Chill Zone Rock and Spud arrive.

"Second place!" Don announced.

"Cool" Rock said.

Carrie and Devin arrive at the Chill Zone next.

"Third!" Don announced

"We're in third place" Devin said disappointedly. "I'm never going to win Shelly back"

 **Team Inteview**

"Don't worry Devin" Carrie said. "Maybe next round we'll get first"

"Thanks Carrie" Devin said. "I couldn't have asked for better friend"

 **End Interview**

Crimson and Ennui make it to the Chill Zone.

"What happened to you guys?" Don asked. "You were in first but now you're in fourth"

"Yeah well we found a decomposing skull" Crimson said.

"It looked like it was there for several days" Ennui said. "We couldn't tell if it was human or-"

"Nope!" Don exclaimed. "You can stop right there"

Back at the farm house, Josee and Jacques finish eating their pot of beans. Josee grabs the travel tip.

"Why did that take so long?" Jacques asked.

"Who cares, let's get going" Josee said.

The camera pans over to Miles riding the bull.

"This is terrible! I never want to do this again!" Miles yelled.

The timer reaches eight seconds. Miles gets off the bull. She appears to be shaking.

"Are you okay?" Laurie said.

"I'm fine, let's just get out of here" Miles said.

Laurie and Miles leave. MacArthur gets up on the bull.

"This is gonna be easy" MacArthur said.

She holds on to the bull and stays on for the full eight seconds.

"Like I said: Easy" MacArthur said.

MacArthur gets off the bull and she and her partner leave. Once their gone Kitty gets up on the bull.

"This is gonna be so fun!" Kitty said.

The bull starts rocking violently but Kitty stays on the bull. Once the eight seconds is up Kitty gets off the bull.

"That was the best challenge ever" Kitty said.

Kitty high fives her sister.

 **Team Interview**

"I have to say, I am seriously impressed Kitty" Emma said.

"Finally" Kitty said.

 **End Interview**

Owen gets up on the bull.

"You gonna be okay up there buddy?" Noah asked.

"Yeah, I'm sure it'll be great" Owen said.

The bull starts shaking.

"Whoa!" Owen exclaimed.

Owen hugs the bull tight until it stops shaking. Owen hops off the bull.

"I am never doing that again" Owen said.

"Am I'm never doing that. Period" Noah said.

Noah and Owen leave.

"It's down to four teams for failure of the day" Don narrated. "The Ice Dancers, Father & Son, Cousins, and Fashion Bloggers"

Jacques gets up on the bull.

"How hard could this thing possibly be" Jacques said.

The bull starts shaking and Jacques starts screaming at the top of his lungs. He tightens his grip on the bull. The bull stops but he continues screaming.

"Are you done yet?" Josee asked.

"Oh... Sorry" Jacques said.

Jacques and Josee leave the farm house. Tom gets on the bull again.

"Okay, I've got this" Tom said.

"Good luck Tom" Jen said. "You need it"

"Thanks Jen" Tom said.

"Like, really need it" Jen added. "You are not strong at all"

"You can stop now" Tom said.

The bull starts moving and Tom is struggling to hold on.

"I always knew I'd die like this!" Tom yelled.

Tom manages to hold on for long enough and as soon as the bull stops moving he falls off.

"Let's get out of here" Tom said.

Back at the Chill Zone Laurie and Miles arrive.

"Fifth place!" Don announced.

"That was not worth eating meat" Miles said.

Sanders and MacArthur arrive at the Chill Zone.

"Sixth!" Don said.

Emma and Kitty are the next ones there.

"Seventh!" Don announced.

Noah and Owen make it to the Chill Zone next.

"Eighth!" Don announced.

Back with the last two teams Dwayne is lying against a hay bale with Junior putting a freezer pack to his forehead.

"You're gonna be up soon dad" Junior said.

Bonnie suddenly crashes into a nearby hay bale.

"I'm okay... The hay broke my fall" Bonnie said weakly.

"Now you're up" Junior said.

"You were right Junior" Dwayne said. "I jinxed us. It's hopeless"

"No it isn't dad" Junior said. "Those cousins are hopeless. You can still beat them if you try hard enough"

"You think?" Dwayne asked.

"Yeah! Sure... Maybe..." Junior said.

"Junior, the feeling of blood pooling in my spine calls for emergency care" Dwayne said. "But the feeling of your faith in me is all the medicine I need"

Dwayne walks over to the bull and gets on.

"I'm ready" Dwayne said.

The bull starts rocking violently and Dwayne hugs the bull tightly in fear.

"Please don't kill me!" Dwayne shouted. "I have a son and a wife!"

The bull stops rocking and Dwayne gets off.

"I'm alive!" Dwayne exclaimed.

Dwayne gets off the bull.

"Let's go dad!" Junior said.

Dwayne and Junior leave. Bonnie gets up on the bull next.

"I can do this" Bonnie said.

"Sure you can" Jack said.

"Will you shut up!" Bonnie yelled.

The bull throws Bonnie off of it and she crashes through a nearby window.

"Ah! Medic! Help!" Bonnie yelled. "I think I broke something!"

"Oh my gosh! Bonnie are you okay?!" Jack exclaimed.

Back at the Chill Zone Josee and Jacques arrive.

"Ninth!" Don announced.

"We'll take it" Josee said.

The Fashion Bloggers and Father & Son teams race towards the Chill Zone. Tom and Jen make it to the Chill Zone first.

"Tenth!" Don announced.

Dwayne and Junior make it to the Chill Zone after them.

"Eleventh place!" Don said.

"We're still in it" Junior said.

"Maybe we can still win this game" Dwayne said.

"Wait, who lost?" Junior asked.

"Not your business" Don said. "But I will inform the losers right now"

Meanwhile, back at the farm house, Bonnie and Jack are sitting down at a bench. Bonnie has her left leg in a cast while two medics inspect her.

"Well, you don't have anything too bad" One medic said. "But be sure to stay off that leg"

The medic hands Bonnie a pair of crutches.

"Are you okay?" Jack asked.

"Considering I just flew through a window I'd say I could be better" Bonnie said.

Don walks over to Jack and Bonnie.

"Jack, Bonnie, you did not complete the challenge" Don said.

"That's because I broke my leg" Bonnie said.

"Technically it's a fracture. Nothing too serious. But keep off the foot so it doesn't get worse" The other medic said.

"Can you please be quiet" Bonnie said.

"So does this mean we're out?" Jack asked Don.

"Yes it does" Don said. "So, get out now"

"Well this sucks..." Bonnie said.

"You kind of deserved it Bonnie" Jack said.

"I know Jack... I know" Bonnie said.

Footage of Jack and Bonnie plays while they narrate over it.

"I think I learned something here. It's that hard work does pay off. Did you learn anything Bonnie?" Jack asked as footage him dragging Bonnie behind him in Morocco was shown.

"I guess that I learned that I was being a bit too pushy with you" Bonnie said as a clip of her pushing Jack's coffin into an open grave in Romania played.

"Only a bit?" Jack asked as a clip of him crashing their moped on their way to France.

"Okay I was being very pushy" Bonnie said as the footage switched to them walking away from the farm house.

"I had fun here" Jack said.

"Still wish I had that million" Bonnie said.

"There's more to life than money" Jack said.

"I know. It's just nice to have money" Bonnie said.

* * *

 **This chapter was a lot longer than I anticipated. I don't know whether or not that means the chapter is good that is up to you guys to decide. As for the elimination, It was time to get rid of Jack and Bonnie. Plus after what Bonnie did to Mary and Ellody in the last chapter she didn't really deserve to stay around. Please let me know your thoughts on the chapter.**


	17. Lord of the Ring Toss

"Last time on the Ridonculous Race! Our teams were full of beans... Who knew so many people hated beans? Total bull is what happened next... Because it's a mechanical bull... Who wrote this? Miles had some troubles eating but Laurie was eventually able to convince her. Bonnie and Jack actually really connected. Then they caught several connecting flights home. There are only eleven teams left so things are about to get fierce. Right here on, The Ridonculous Race"

Don is standing by the Don Box in Alberta.

"We're back in southern Alberta" Don said. "And yesterday's winners are grabbing today's tip"

Geoff and Brody run over to the Don Box.

 **Team Interview**

"Winning was super cool. And it would be great to come in first again" Brody said. "But it's best not to count your chickens before the cart"

"What does that mean?" Geoff asked.

"Don't know" Brody said. "But it sounds real deep"

 **End Interview**

Geoff takes a travel tip from the Don Box.

"Awesome! We're flying to the Arctic circle" Geoff read.

"Cool! Circles are my favourite shape" Brody said. "They're super well rounded"

Cut to a plain blue background with a picture of a glacier to accompany it.

"The Arctic circle" Don narrated. "Home to the harshest weathers, whitest animals, and most beloved storybook characters"

Cut to Don at the Arctic circle near a Don Box. Don is wearing a parka.

"Teams must fly here by Cessna" Don said. "Three teams per flight. With the exception of the last flight which will carry two. The teams will be chilled to the bone to find that there's another boomerang in play"

Don takes a boomerang ticket out from behind his back.

"Use this on another team and they must complete the first challenge a second time" Don explained.

Cut to Crimson and Ennui taking their travel tip. Carrie and Devin run up to them.

"Hey guys, what's up?" Carrie asked.

"Hey" Ennui said flatly.

 **Team Interview**

"The Goths did really well in Alberta" Carrie said. "Think we should try and form an alliance with them?"

"Alliances are just invitations to get stabbed in the back..." Devin said, seeming depressed. "You can never really know anyone. As soon as you think you do, WAM! They rip your heart out and eat it... Then they probably play a game of tennis"

"So is that a no?" Carrie asked.

 **Second Interview**

"You where so friendly with Carrie and Devin" Crimson said. "You practically smiled"

"They're survivors like us" Ennui said. "I felt a kinship"

"Do we try to form an alliance?" Crimson asked.

The duo thinks for a few seconds.

"No" They both said.

 **End Interview**

Sanders and MacArthur grab their travel tip. As they're leaving Emma and Kitty pass them.

"Hi" Kitty said.

MacArthur glares at her.

"I don't like the way that Kitty girl acts" MacArthur said.

"Nice?" Sanders said, seeming confused.

"Yeah" MacArthur said.

 **Team Interview**

"Nice is when you get a green ribbon for effort. Not when you win a million dollars" MacArthur said. "Do they want to win or not?

 **End Interview**

Cut to a Cessna plane flying in the air.

"All planes have taken off towards the Arctic circle" Don said. "Where the ice is nearly as thick as the tension between our teams"

Cut to the inside of a plane containing the Sisters, Ice Dancers, and Reality TV Pros.

"These tiny planes are safe, right?" Owen asked.

"Probably" Noah said.

Josee walks over to Owen and Noah.

"I read somewhere that eighty six percent of small planes crash" Josee said.

"Ah!" Owen screamed.

Owen hugs Noah tightly.

 **Team Interview**

"When you're a professional ice dancer you either learn to play mind games or learn which companies let washed up athletes be in their commercials" Josee said.

 **End Interview**

In the Arctic the first plane lands and the Surfers, Best Friends, and Rockers get off the plane.

Geoff and Brody get to the Don Box first.

"Cool it's a Botch or Watch" Brody read. "I rode the bull in Alberta so this one is you"

Brody hands the travel tip to Geoff.

"Find a ring hidden in the snow and toss it on to a narwhal" Geoff read. "Heh, narwhal"

"What's a narwhal?" Brody asked.

Cut to Don near a half frozen lake.

"In this challenge teams must find a hoop hidden in the snow near here and then throw it on to the tusk of a narwhal" Don said.

Don pulls a hoop out of a nearby pile of snow.

"Like this" Don said.

Don throws the ring but it misses the narwhal.

"Can I do another take?" Don asked someone off camera.

"No sir you can't" A man from out of view said.

"Well I'm sure the audience gets the idea" Don said.

Cut to Don standing near some snowmobiles.

"After that they must ride these snowmobiles east until they find the next Don Box" Don explained. "That Don Box is the last chance they have for using their boomerang"

Cut to Rock taking a travel tip from the Don Box.

"Okay, let's see what the next challenge is" Rock said.

Rock looks at the travel tip before realizing there's a Boomerang on it.

"Whoa! Look at that Spud" Rock said.

"Cool, we got the boomerang" Spud said.

 **Team Interview**

"We just got the most powerful item in this game dude" Rock said. "We need to be careful about how we use it"

"Sure... Wait how do we do that?" Spud asked.

"I don't know" Rock said.

 **End Interview**

Rock is digging through the snow. He pulls a ring out.

"All right! I got a ring!" Rock cheered.

Rock throws the hoop at a narwhal but misses.

"I think you missed, man" Spud said.

"I can see that" Rock said.

The camera pans over to Geoff and Brody. Geoff is digging through a pile of snow.

"Woohoo! Way to dig bro" Brody said. "You 're the man!"

An Inuit man pops out of the pile of snow.

"Uh... You're the man too" Brody said.

Brody high fives the man.

Cut to Geoff and Brody talking to each other with the Best Friends and Rocks digging in the background.

"This is horrible, I can't even find a ring" Geoff said.

"No worries bro" Brody said. "Usually I'm the one letting us down. This is a nice change"

"That's true" Geoff said. "Huh, I guess I'm pulling a Brody"

Geoff laughs and Brody facepalms.

"That wasn't where I was going with that" Brody said.

Cut to Geoff finally finding a hoop.

"I found a ring!" Geoff yelled happily.

He throws the ring towards the lake but due to there being no narwhals it ends up just falling into the water.

"Dude, wait until you see a water unicorn" Brody said.

"Oh, right, right, sorry" Geoff said.

The camera pans to Rock throwing a hoop. He throws the ring and it lands on a narwhals horn.

"Yeah! I got it!" Rock cheered. "Let's go Spud"

"What are we doing?" Spud asked.

"We're taking a snowmobile" Rock said.

"Cool!" Spud said.

Back at the airfield the last three planes land.

"As things get colder for the first three teams the other planes land here in the Arctic" Don narrated.

Cut to Carrie digging through the snow. Crimson and Ennui walk up behind her.

"Hi" Crimson said flatly.

"Mind if I dig here?" Ennui asked.

"Nope" Carrie said.

Carrie pulls a ring out of the pile of snow.

"Devin! I found a ring!" Carrie cheered.

"Whatever..." Devin said unemotionally.

 **Team Interview**

"When did Devin become so cool?" Crimson asked.

 **End Interview**

Carrie is talking to the camera with Devin looking depressed in the background.

"It's a good thing that I'm doing the challenge" Carrie said. "Because I think Devin's hit the next stage of his breakup: Depression"

Devin falls over.

"Yep..." Carrie said awkwardly. "Stage four... I'm in for a long day"

Ennui takes a ring out of the snow. He walks over to the lake and holds up the ring. A narwhal pops out of the lake almost right under the ring. Ennui drops the ring over the narwhals horn.

 **Tam Interview**

"Okay, that was just pure luck" Ennui said.

"But we aren't telling them that" Crimson said.

 **End Interview**

Jen throws a ring and it goes over the narwhal's horn.

"Yes. It only took five tries" Jen said.

"Nice work Jen" Tom said.

The camera pans to Owen throwing the hoop. It goes on to the horn of the narwhal.

"I ringed a narwhal!" Owen cheered.

"Nice work" Noah said.

The camera pans to Laurie getting ready to throw her ring.

"Are you ready?" Miles asked.

"Yes, of course I am" Laurie said. "I'm just waiting for the right moment"

Laurie throws the ring. It hits the side of the narwhals tusk and bounces back to hit Laurie in the eye.

"Ow! My eye!" Laurie exclaimed.

The camera pans to Geoff throwing a ring. Instead of even getting close to the narwhal it hits the cameraman and knocks him over.

"Are you okay camera dude?" Brody asked.

"I'll be fine..." The cameraman said weakly.

 **Team Interview**

"There are only eleven teams left to crush with my mind" Josee said.

"And those surfers are the next ones that will be crushed" Jacques said.

 **End Interview**

Geoff is digging though a pile of snow.

"Come on! Come on!" Geoff said desperately.

"Oh, hey, are you still here?" Josee asked "I thought your partner was the weak link on your team? But maybe not"

Meanwhile, Rock and Spud are the first ones to arrive at the next Don Box.

"We made it" Spud said.

"Hold on" Rock said. "This is our last chance to use the Boomerang"

"We have the Boomerang?!" Spud exclaimed."Wait what does it do?"

"We get to send a team back" Rock said.

"But we're in the lead" Spud pointed out. "We haven't done this well since Finland"

"Yeah, but the next team to make it here might be extra tough and stuff" Rock said.

"Seems kind of, like, not a good idea to wait for the next team" Spud said.

"No offence Spud but you aren't exactly the sharpest knife in the... knife thing" Rock said.

"No, I want to prove my point" Spud said. "Because I'm not dumb. D-U-M dumb. That is not me"

Rock and Spud are so distracted by their arguing they don't notice Crimson and Ennui run past them and take a travel tip from the Don Box.

"Hmm... It's an All-In" Ennui read.

Cut to Don standing next to an igloo. An Inuit girl is next to him.

"In this challenge teams must saw blocks of snow and assemble them into an igloo" Don explained. "Once they get the approval if this local girl-"

Cut to Don at the Chill Zone. There's a snowman next to him.

"It's a race due east to meet me at the Chill Zone" Don said. "Where I'll be surrounded by as many portable heaters as the crew can provide"

Don shivers.

"Seriously guys, please get me some more heaters" Don said.

Cut back to Rock and Spud.

"Okay, we'll do it your way" Spud said.

Tom and Jen then park their snowmobiles and run over to the Don Box Rock and Spud are at.

"Okay, time for the travel tip" Tom said.

"Wait! I have a boomerang" Rock said.

"So we're using my plan" Spud said excitedly.

"Yes we are Spud" Rock said. "And I'm using it on Tom and Jen"

"What?!" Jen said. "Why?"

"Aren't we like enemies or something?" Rock asked.

"Well if we weren't before we definitely are now" Tom said.

"So do we just go back to the first challenge now that we've been Boomeranged?" Jen asked.

"I guess so" Rock said.

"Well bye" Jen said.

Jen and Tom get on their snowmobile and drive away.

Back at the narwhal lake Laurie is getting ready to throw the ring again. She now has a black eye from the earlier incident.

"And you're sure you're going to be okay?" Miles asked.

"Yes Miles, I know what I'm doing" Laurie said.

Laurie throws the ring she's holding but and misses the narwhal.

"Not again" Laurie said.

"You'll be better next time" Miles said.

"I hope so" Laurie said.

The camera pans to Geoff throwing a ring at a narwhal and missing.

"It's okay dude... You're doing great" Brody said, trying not to sound too sad.

 **Team Interview**

"This was a total low point for me and the Brodster" Geoff said. "I've never disappointed him before"

"Aw... Bro" Brody said.

"And I never want to do it again" Geoff said.

 **End Interview**

Geoff lines up his shot and throws the ring. The wind blows it back and it goes over Brody's neck.

"Why!?" Brody yelled.

Josee throws the ring over the narwhals horn.

"Let's go" Josee said.

"Right" Jacques said.

She and Jacques run past Geoff and Brody.

"Oh hey, good luck" Josee said. "I hope you don't lose your best friend because you're so bad at this"

 **Team Interview**

"At the mind game Olympics I would take the gold" Josee said.

"She would, trust me" Jacques said.

 **End Interview**

Junior digging through a pile of snow to look for a ring.

"Do you see anything yet?" Dwayne asked.

"No I don't" Junior said. "Maybe it'd be better if you helped?"

"I can't help" Dwayne said. "It's a Botch or Watch. All I can do is watch. Sorry sport"

The camera pans to Geoff and Brody talking. Geoff is nervously holding a ring.

"Dude, I'm sorry if I ever made you feel bad for ever messing up a challenge" Geoff said.

"And I'm sorry if I'm making you feel like you're letting me down because you aren't" Brody said. "No, you couldn't let me down"

"Let's bro-hug, man" Geoff said.

"Totally" Brody said.

Geoff throws his ring behind him and the two of them hug. Brody notices that somehow the ring Geoff threw behind him went on the tusk of a narwhal.

"Dude! You ringed it!" Brody exclaimed.

"Sweet!" Geoff cheered.

Carrie throws a ring and it goes over the narwhals tusk too.

"Yes!" Carrie cheered.

"We should hurry" Geoff said.

Cut to later where Carrie and Devin are in their snowmobile.

"Hey Devin, maybe you could help me out more next time?" Carrie asked.

"Helplessness is a sign of depression" Devin said unemotionally.

Cut to Carrie talking to the camera with Devin sitting on the snowmobile in the background.

"Wow, Devin's rock bottom must be in a hole, in a box, at the bottom the Grand Canyon" Carrie said.

Pan ahead to Geoff and Brody driving in their snowmobile.

"We went from first to all the way back here on my watch" Geoff said. "But don't worry. I'm gonna-"

"Dude, lookout!" Brody exclaimed.

Brody points to a baby seal in the middle of the path. Geoff tries to dodge the seal but ends up driving off of a cliff.

 **Team Interview**

"Uh, for the record that did not go how I thought it would" Geoff said.

 **End Interview**

Meanwhile, Crimson cuts out a block of snow. Ennui picks it up and drops it on the ground. The block turns back into regular snow.

"Ugh... Let's just build a mound of snow a hollow it out" Ennui said.

"Good plan" Crimson said.

 **Team Interview**

"Fluffy, white, snow... It's not our thing" Ennui said.

 **End Interview**

At the lake Sanders throws a ring a narwhal but falls short.

"Sanders, if you take any longer I'm gonna have to charge you overtime" MacArthur said. "Seriously, hurry up"

Tom and Jen park their snowmobile and get off.

"There are only three teams left here" Jen said. "I need to hurry if I want to catch up"

"Wait Jen, you already went" Tom said "That means I have to go"

 **Team Interview**

"I'm not really and athletic person" Tom said. "I could barely handle basic gymnastics in Romania. How am I going to be able to hit a moving target"

"All I can say is good luck" Jen said.

 **End Interview**

Junior takes a ring and throws it. He overshoots it and the ring goes over the narwhals.

"Shoot" Junior said.

"Try aiming a little lower next time sport" Dwayne said.

"I know what I'm doing" Junior said. "The wind threw me off"

Back at the place where the Surfer Dudes crashed. Geoff climbs out of the pit the impact of their snowmobile made.

"I'm out!" Geoff cheered. "I'll get you out bro"

Geoff looks behind him and sees the seal he nearly hit glaring at him. The seal pounces on him and he falls back into the pit.

Back at the lake Laurie throws another ring and this time it goes over the narwhal horn.

"Yes!" Laurie cheered.

"Let's get out of here" Miles said.

The camera pans to Tom getting ready to throw.

"Alright... I'm setting up the shot..." Tom said, seeming concentrated.

"Could you please hurry it up a bit?" Jen asked.

"Right" Tom said.

Tom throws the hoop and a barely goes three feet in front of him.

"We're screwed..." Tom said.

 **Team Interview**

"If we make it through this challenge those Rockers are in for some trouble" Jen said.

 **End Interview**

Rock and Spud are trying to position a block of snow.

"Is it just me or are your hands numb from the cold too?" Rock asked.

"My hands are always numb" Spud said.

"You should get that checked out" Rock said.

The camera pans to Crimson and Ennui finishing up their pile of snow.

"Now we just have to hollow it out" Ennui said.

Carrrie and Devin park their snowmobile next to Crimson and Ennui.

"Okay, let's find a good spot to set up" Carrie said.

Devin glances at Ennui.

"Hey" Devin said unemotionally.

"Hey" Ennui said in the same unemotional tone.

Carrie looks at Devin.

"I'm sorry. Did you say "Hey" or "Here"? I need to know" Carrie said.

"Both" Devin said.

"Um... Okay" Carrie said.

Pan over to Noah and Owen working on their igloo.

"How many more blocks of ice do we need?" Noah asked. "Because this sawing is really hard on my wrists"

"Not too sure" Owen said.

Noah notices Emma waving at him.

"Hi Emma" Noah said.

"Hello Noah" Emma said.

Kitty grabs Emma's arm and pulls her closer to her.

"Emma, I think we should take a page from your book and focus more on the challenge" Kitty said. "Just for right now"

"Right" Emma said.

Back at the lake Tom is getting ready to take another shot.

"Try and focus everything you've got" Jen instructed.

"What does that mean?" Tom asked.

"I'm just trying to sound motivational, okay" Jen said.

"Sorry" Tom said. "I'll try my best"

Tom throws the hoop he's holding but he undershoots it and it misses the narwhal.

"Damn it" Tom said.

Back igloo building sight Geoff and Brody finally make it there. They look very beat up from the snowmobile crash and seal attack.

"Okay dude, you start sawing and I'll do the building" Geoff said.

"Sure" Brody said.

 **Team Interview**

"The tension seed we planted with the surfers has sprouted" Jacques said.

"And now it's time to make it bloom" Josee said.

 **End Interview**

Josee walks up behind Geoff.

"Listen, you need to pick it up" Josee whispered to Geoff. "Brody told Jacques that you were dragging him down"

"Is he upset about the snowmobile thing too?" Geoff asked.

"Very" Josee said.

Cut to Geoff talking to the camera with Brody building in the background.

"Why wouldn't Brody tell me that he's upset with me?" Geoff asked. "Unless he's _really_ upset with me... I need to kick it into overtime!"

Cut to Brody getting ready to put another block on the igloo. Geoff runs up to the igloo and starts piling blocks of snow on it.

"Whoa man! Take it easy!" Brody exclaimed.

"No way bro" Geoff said. "We're too far behind to-"

The igloo collapses.

"Crap..." Geoff said.

Back at the lake Junior is getting ready to throw the ring.

"Now the key is that you've got to keep a clear head" Dwayne said

"I know what I'm doing dad" Junior said.

Junior throws the ring and goes over the narwhals horn.

"Yes!" Junior cheered.

"Way to go Junior" Dwayne said. "Let's get out of here"

The camera pans to Tom taking another shot at the ring toss.

"Thirty sixth time is the charm" Jen said.

"Even numbers are always my lucky ones" Tom said.

Tom throws the ring but he overshoots it and the ring goes over the narwhals head.

"Oh come on!" Tom cried out in frustration.

The camera pans to Sanders getting ready to throw the ring.

"Okay, I'm ready" Sanders said.

She throws the hoop and it goes over the tusk of the narwhal.

"Nice work partner!" MacArthur cheered. "We're not in last place!"

MacArthur starts jumping up and down excitedly. This causes the piece of ice their standing on to break off and start floating away.

"This looks bad..." Sanders said.

Back at the igloo area Crimson and Ennui happen to walk past where Carrie and Devin are building.

"Hey, want to make an alliance or whatever?" Devin asked.

"What?!" Carrie exclaimed.

Cut to Crimson and Ennui talking to the camera with the other teams building in the background.

"It's tempting" Ennui said. "He's dark enough"

"But is his partner?" Crimson asked.

Cut back to the Best Friends and Goths talking.

"Thanks, but we don't do alliances" Ennui said.

"Whatever" Devin said.

The camera pans to Geoff and Brody.

"Aw man... I don't wanna be the reason we get sent home" Geoff said.

"It's not your fault" Brody said. "It's mine"

"Maybe it's nobody's fault bro" Geoff suggested.

"Really?" Brody asked.

"Yeah, maybe we just gotta chill on the stress and finish this igloo" Geoff said. "We're not faulters. We're surfers"

"Yeah! We can do this!" Brody cheered loudly.

The loudness of Brody's cheering causes their igloo to collapse again.

"Whoops..." Brody said.

"It's cool" Geoff said. "We still have time"

Back at the lake Tom is getting ready to throw the ring once more.

"This time you've got this" Jen said. "I believe in you"

"Thanks Jen" Tom said.

Tom throws the ring as hard as he can and it goes over the narwhals horn.

"Yes! Finally!" Tom cheered.

"Let's hurry" Jen said. "We're in last place"

Meanwhile, in the middle of the lake Sanders and MacArthur are floating around on their chunk of ice.

"The temperature of the water might kill us" MacArthur said. "But we've got no choice... You go first"

Sanders glares at her partner.

"What? Too cold?" MacArthur asked.

Suddenly something collides with the chunk of ice they're on. MacArthur looks behind her and sees a narwhal pushing the ice float.

"Whoa, sweet" MacArthur said.

 **Team Interview**

"I used to hate all mammals" MacArthur said. "But that narwhal was pretty cool"

"Uh, humans are mammals" Sanders said.

"I know" MacArthur said.

 **End Interview**

Back at the igloo building area Rock and Spud finish building their igloo.

"We did it" Rock said.

"Cool" Spud said.

The Inuit girl walks over to them and gives their building a thumbs up.

"Thank lady" Spud said.

Rock and Spud run off.

The camera pans to Josee and Jacques putting the finishing touches on their igloo.

"Done" Josee said. "Hey, little girl! Get over here!"

The girl runs over to Josee and Jacques and gives them a thumbs up. Josee and Jacques start running and accidentally knocks over the girl.

Meanwhile, Don is waiting for the teams at the Chill Zone.

"Man, where is everybody?" Don asked. "I am freezing"

Rock and Spud run over to the Chill Zone.

"First place!" Don announced.

"High five!" Rock said.

Rock high fives his partner.

Back at the igloo building area Kitty and Emma get the thumbs up from the girl.

"Thanks" Emma said. "Hey Kitty, do you think that we should help Noah out just a little bit before we go?"

"Emma! Listen to yourself" Kitty said.

"You're right" Emma said. "I need to keep focused"

Back at the Chill Zone Josee and Jacques arrive.

"Second place!" Don said. "Pretty good"

"This is what I think of second place!" Josee yelled.

Josee runs up to the snow man near the Chill Zone and destroys it.

"No! Not Chilly Billy!" Don exclaimed.

Don runs up to the remains of the snow man.

"I'll avenge you!" Don yelled.

"Oh grow up" Josee said.

Back at the building area Tom and Jen park their snow mobile.

"We made it" Tom said.

"Thank god" Jen said.

The camera pans to the girl giving the thumbs up to both the Best Friends and the Reality TV Pros.

"Thanks" Carrie said.

"Whatever" Devin said.

"Thank you" Noah said.

The girl walks over to Crimson and Ennui. She sees that they've made their igloo into the shape of a skull and uncomfortably stares at it.

"What?" Ennui asked.

The girls backs away.

Sanders and MacArthur make it to the building area and find an empty spot.

"I'll stack" Sanders said. "You grab the saw and make me blocks until I say stop"

"On it!" MacArthur said.

 **Team Interview**

"We have one thing over all the other teams" MacArthur said. "We're used to working together"

"Thanks for not mentioning I put us in jeopardy by messing up the ring toss thing" Sanders said.

"Eh, I thought it went without saying" MacArthur said.

 **End Interview**

At the Chill Zone Emma and Kitty arrive.

"Third!" Don announced.

"Way cool" Kitty said.

Owen and Noah run over to the Chill Zone.

"Fourth!" Don said.

"Woohoo!" Owen cheered.

Carrie and Devin run over to the Chill Zone.

"Fifth!" Don said.

"That's not too bad" Carrie said.

"Whatever" Devin said.

Laurie and Miles run up to Don.

"Sixth!" Don announced.

Back at the building area Tom and Jen are building their igloo. Tom tries to put a block on but it doesn't fit.

"Come on!" Tom exclaimed

"Don't worry tom" Jen said. "We're almost done"

The camera pans over to Geoff and Brody building.

"We're going to win this man" Brody said.

"Don't worry bro, we can't be too far away from finishing" Geoff said.

Back at the Chill Zone Crimson and Ennui arrive.

"You're in Seventh" Don said.

"Don't care" Crimson said.

Dwayne and Junior run over to the Chill Zone next.

"Eighth place!" Don announced. "That means the Fashion Bloggers, Surfer Dudes, or Police Cadets will be eliminated"

Cut back to the three teams working at the building area.

"Hand me a block" Sanders said.

"You got it" MacArthur said.

"Saw faster" Jen said.

"This is as fast as I can go" Tom said.

"Come on bro, work that saw. We only need a few more blocks" Brody said.

"You got it dude" Geoff said.

Cut to later where the three teams have finished their igloos.

"Done!" The teams cheered.

The girl gives the three of them the thumbs up.

"To speed things up, and because I'm freezing, the last three teams are allowed to ride their snowmobiles to the Chill Zone" Don explained via voice over.

The Police Cadets, Surfer Dudes, and Fashion Bloggers get on their snowmobiles and drive away.

"Speed this up Sanders" MacArthur said.

"We're going as fast as this snowmobile can!" Sanders said.

"Come on dude, try and pass the others" Brody said.

"That's easier said than done bro" Geoff said.

"Tom! I think we're going to crash" Jen said.

"Don't be ridiculous Jen" Tom said. "We aren't going to-"

The three teams crash into a large snow bank and end up coming out the other inside a giant snowball.

Cut to Don waiting for the other teams at the Chill Zone.

"Man, what is taking these people so long?" Don asked. "I am freezing"

Don hears a loud rumbling noise getting closer to him.

"Um... What's that?" Don asked.

The large snowball starts rolling towards Don.

"This is bad" Don said.

The snowball stops before rolling over Don.

"Huh, I was not expecting to see this today" Don said.

Something seems to be moving inside the snowball. Sanders and MacArthur pop out of the snowball and land on the Carpet of Completion.

"Ninth!" Don announced.

Tom and Jen fall out of the snowball and on to the carpet after them.

"Tenth!" Don said.

Geoff and Brody are the last ones to fall out of the snowball.

"Geoff, Brody, I'm sorry to say but: You are eliminated" Don said.

"Bummer" Geoff said.

"Bummer indeed" Don said. "But rules are rules"

"We'll miss you Don dude" Brody said.

Clips of Geoff and Brody competing play while they narrate over it.

"Aw man, can't believe we're going home" Brody said over a clip of them going over hot coals in Hawaii.

"Yeah, those ice dudes do not play by the rules" Geoff said over a clip of him driving their snowmobile off a cliff just earlier.

"But on the bright side I'm glad we were able to stay best buds all the way through this" Brody said as a clip of him posing for a sketch in Paris played.

"Totally" Geoff said as the footage switched to them walking away.

"We both rocked this race" Brody said.

"I know. I hope Bridgette saw this" Geoff said.

* * *

 **This was a fun chapter for me to write. I loved writing the location of the Arctic. As for the elimination, I didn't really want to eliminate Geoff and Brody but there were other characters (Like Dwayne and junior for example) that I wanted to give more screen time (Or word time I guess). So I got rid of the Surfers to give other people more focus. Also they got pretty far in canon. So that's another reason.**


	18. Got Venom

"Last time on the Ridonculous Race! We made ring toss even more frusterating by making the teams throw the rings at narwhals. Rock and Spud scored the Boomerang and ended up using it their sort-of-enemies: Tom and Jen. But in the end, thanks to Josee and Jacques, the Surfer Dudes ended up being sent home. At least their still friends. But friendship still isn't money. Speaking of which by the end of the day all but one team will be closer to the prize. Who will they be? Find out on: The Ridonculous Race!"

Don is standing near the Don Box in the Arctic.

"We're back in the Arctic Circle" Don said. "And yesterday's winners, the Rockers, get the first travel tip"

Rock and Spud run over to the Don Box.

"It is freezing out here" Rock said. "I can't believe we're not dead"

"I know man" Spud said. "Weird"

Rock takes a travel tip.

"It says we're going to Flores Indonesia" Rock read.

"Where's that? South America?" Spud asked.

"Maybe" Rock said.

Cut to a background of the Indonesian flag and a photo of the beach there to accompany it.

"It's not" Don narrated. "Flores Indonesia is packed with beautiful beaches, Majestic mountains, and ominously silent jungles"

Cut to Don in Flores next to the Don Box.

"After they fly here teams must take a taxi to the Don Box" Don explained. "How do locals keep obnoxious tourists away from this island paradise? Nobody knows"

The camera zooms out to reveal a bunch of Komodo Dragons in the area.

"But it might have something to do with all these Komodo Dragons that hang around" Don said.

Cut back to Don in the Arctic. He is standing next to three planes.

"Team will be leaving on three planes that leave an hour apart based on when they arrived" Don explained. "That way the front runner have a real advantage"

An angry looking narwhal pops its head out of the ice near Don.

"Gah!" Don exclaimed.

Several more narwhals puncture the tires of one of the planes.

"Um... Apparently the narwhals are upset about the ring toss thing" Don said. "Anyway, same idea just with two planes"

The narwhals pop the tires on the other plane.

"Everyone on the last plane! Hurry!" Don shouted to the contestants.

All the teams, minus the Ice Dancers, grab their travel tips and run into the plane. The camera pans to Josee and Jacques looking annoyed.

"We did not take silver just to get stuck on a plane full of losers" Josee said.

"I agree" Jacques said.

A narwhals bursts through the ice near them.

"Never mind!" Jacques exclaimed.

"Run!" Josee yelled.

The two of them get on the plane. The planes takes off.

"The teams are now in a ten way tie as they fly to sunny Indonesia" Don said via voice over. "A narwhal free country"

Cut to the plane landing in Indonisa all the teams run off the plane as soon as it lands. The teams run up to the nearby road and call for taxis.

"Taxi!" Owen yelled.

A taxi speeds by them.

"Seriously" Noah said.

"Hey, Noah, over here!" Emma said, gesturing to her taxi.

"Thanks" Noah said.

Noah and Owen get in the taxi with Emma and Kitty.

"It's a little cramped in here..." Kitty said.

"Sorry" Owen said. "I'm a big guy"

"It sure is nice here" Noah said. "It's one of the few countries in the world that gets my approval"

"Same here" Emma said.

The taxi stops at a street sign with an outline of a Komodo Dragon on it.

"Um... What's that?" Owen asked.

"A Komodo Dragon crossing" The driver said.

"Oh... Wait what?!" Owen exclaimed.

"Cool, a dragon" Kitty said. "I gotta get a picture of that"

A Komodo Dragon steps into the road.

"That thing can't get us in the car right?" Owen asked.

The Komodo Dragon bitres off the license plate on the taxi.

"Drive!" Owen yelled.

The driver steps on the gas and drives around the Komodo Dragon knocking over the sign in the process.

"I'm never coming back here" Emma said.

Everyone else in the cab nods.

Cut to later where the Sisters, Best Friends, Rockers, and Reality TV Pros arrive at the Don Box. A Komodo Dragon is curled up around the Don Box.

"So... Who wants to go first?" Noah asked.

"Don't worry man" Spud said. "You just gotta make some noise for it to go away"

Spud walks over to a nearby Taxi. He sticks his hand through the window and honks the horn. This alerts the Komodo Dragon and it starts chasing after the taxi.

"Nice work" Rock said.

Rock walks over to the Don Box and takes the travel tip.

"Okay it says we have to..." Rock read. "What?!"

Cut to Don standing near a few sleeping Komodo Dragons. An Indonesian kid is standing next to Don.

"Just when you thought these beasts were harmless it turns out that their saliva is loaded with venom" Don said. "Teams must collect one vial of Komodo Dragon saliva and give it to this kid for their next travel tip. Also try not to get any poison on you. Side effects may include dizziness, upset stomach, and possibly death"

Cut to the other teams getting their travel tips.

"This seems a little dangerous" Kitty said.

"Ha! Danger? We all die eventually" Devin said.

"We should hang out more" Ennui said.

Cut to Carrie talking to the camera with the other teams in the background.

"If Devin goes Goth I am not going Goth for him" Carrie said. "Who am I kidding. I probably would"

Meanwhile, Rock is slowly approaching a Komodo Dragon with a vial.

"Okay... I need to be very careful" Rock said nervously.

Spud grabs Rock's shoulders and holds him back.

"Whoa man! Be careful!" Spud exclaimed. "We don't know how far these things can spew fire"

"Pretty sure they're not those kinds of dragons" Rock said.

"So why are they called dragons then?" Spud asked.

"That's a good point" Rock said. "Okay, let's go find some water to put out its fire breath"

"Is that how fire breath works?" Spud asked.

"I don't know" Rock said. "I'm just taking a stab in the dark"

Meanwhile Tom takes a mango down from a tree.

"Okay, here's what we do" Tom said. "We give the mango to a dragon and when its done eating it we collect the saliva from the pit"

"Do these things like mangos?" Jen asked. "They don't really look like vegetarians"

"I'll go check" Tom said.

Tom walks over to a Komodo Dragon while holding a mango.

"Hey there little guy" Tom said. "Want a mango?"

The Komodo Dragon looks at Tom.

"Here you go" Tom said.

He puts the mango on the ground. The Komodo Dragon starts chasing after Tom. He quickly runs away.

"You were right Jen!" Tom exclaimed. "They're not vegetarians!"

"This is gonna end badly" Jen said.

Meanwhile, two Komodo Dragons are eating the remains of a dead cattle. Owen and Noah watch from behind a nearby rock.

"They look harmless enough" Noah said.

One Komodo Dragon chomps on one of the bulls horns.

"Maybe they won't try and eat us if they're already full" Owen said.

"That never really stopped you" Noah said. "We'll wait for them to finish eating then collect some saliva from the carcass. Let's go see what Emma and Kitty are doing until then"

Cut to Owen talking to the camera with the jungle in the background.

"I'm glad that Noah is happy" Owen said. "But part of me thinks he's spending a bit too much time with Emma. If he's going to be distracted I might have to take over as team leader"

Meanwhile, Laurie and Miles are approaching a Komodo Dragon.

"Okay... Be very careful" Laurie said.

"I'm doing my best" Miles said.

 **Team Interview**

"We like to pride ourselves in loving all animals" Laurie said.

"Just not the kind that won't hesitate to kill you" Miles said. "We're more into protecting elephants and aardvarks then we're with protecting snakes and scorpions"

 **End Interview**

Tom and Jen are hiding up in a tree hiding from the Komodo Dragon.

"Okay, so what do we do know?" Jen asked.

"I thought you had a plan" Tom said.

"Um... What are you doing up there?" A voice from below asked.

Tom and Jen look down to see Rock and Spud.

"We're hiding from the dragons" Tom said.

"Oh I know what to do" Spud said. "Just make some noise"

"I'm not sure that's a good idea" Jen said.

"Hey dragon man!" Spud shouted. "Get out of here!"

The Komodo Dragon runs towards Rock and Spud.

"I think you made things worse" Rock said.

"Whoops" Spud said.

Rock and Spud climb up the tree.

"I thought you said you knew what to do" Jen said.

"Yeah... Turns out I don't" Spud said. "Sorry man"

"It's a bit late for that" Jen said.

Meanwhile, Noah and Owen find the skin of a Komodo Dragon on the ground.

"Check it out! That dragon exploded or something" Owen said.

"It's just skin" Noah said. "I guess Komodo's malt like every other reptile"

Owen suddenly gasps.

"Uh oh, I see wheels turning" Noah said.

"If I wear the skin I could go right up to one and swipe some spit" Owen said.

"You wanna make out with a Komodo Dragon?" Noah asked, seeming confused.

"No. I mean, I won't rule it out. But that wasn't my plan" Owen said.

Meanwhile, Sanders and MacArthur are hiding in a bush. They are watching a Komodo Dragon.

"We go on three" MacArthur said. "Are you ready?"

"Um... No" Sanders said.

"Great" MacArthur said. "One... Two..."

Cut to Sanders and MacArthur talking to the camera.

"We're gonna bag a Komodo Dragon the same way we bagged the bunnies in Australia" Sanders said.

"If it worked for rabbits why wouldn't it work for giant man-eating lizards?" MacArthur said.

"This isn't gonna end well" Sanders said.

Cut to them jumping out of the bush and into the centre of a group of Komodo Dragon's.

"Freeze you iguana wannabes!" MacArthur exclaimed.

The Komodo's slowly start to approach the Police Cadets.

"Um... Do you have a back up plan" Sanders asked.

"Yeah" MacArthur said. "Run for it!"

MacArthur and Sanders run away from the Komodo Dragon's and climb up the nearest tree.

"I don't like this back up plan" Sanders said.

"Hey, we're alive aren't we?" MacArthur said.

Meanwhile Jacques and Josee are watching a Komodo Dragon from behind a tree. The Komodo coughs up a pile of bones and saliva.

"Go get it" Josee said.

"Got it" Jacques said.

Jacques starts running but he slips on the puddle of saliva and falls to the ground face first. He looks up and sees a Komodo Dragon looking right at him.

"Hi..." Jacques said awkwardly.

Crimson and Ennui walk up to the Komodo Dragon and for some reason it scurries away.

"Spare some venom?" Crimson asked the Komodo.

The Komodo Dragon runs further away.

"Whatever" Crimson said.

 **Team Interview**

"We both wear organic Komodo Dragon musk deodorant" Crimson said.

"It's called Komodorant" Ennui said. "Terrible name. Great product"

"It obviously comes from bigger scarier Komodo Dragons" Crimson said. "So we smell like trouble to these wimps"

 **End Interview**

Devin is approaching an angry looking Komodo Dragon.

"I understand that you're angry" Devin said to the Dragon. "I was angry once but I saw it was a waste of energy"

Cut to Carrie talking to the camera.

"Devin has moved on to the final stage: Acceptance" Carrie said. "The next time the moment is right I'm telling him how I feel"

In the background Devin runs by while being chased by the Komodo Dragon.

"If he survives" Carrie said.

Meanwhile, the Fashion Bloggers and Rockers are still at the top of the tree from earlier.

"Okay, I think the Komodo Dragons are asleep now" Tom said.

"What do we do?" Rock asked.

"We'll make a run for it" Jen said.

"I call going first" Spud said.

Spud jumps down from the tree and wakes up the Komodo Dragon. The Komodo hisses at Spud.

"Whoops..." Spud said. "The rest of you guys had better run"

Rock, Tom, and Jen drop down from the tree and start running from the Komodo Dragon with Spud.

 **Team Interview**

"That could have gone better" Spud said.

"Yeah" Rock said.

 **End Interview**

Meanwhile, Owen is wearing the skin of the Komodo Dragon. He slowly approaches a group of Komodo's while Noah watches from behind a rock.

"Oh, g'day fellas. Mind if I join in" Owen said to the Komodo's while doing a terrible Australian accent.

The Komodo Dragons look at him suspiciously.

"Why is he doing an accent?" Noah asked himself.

Owen picks up a bone from the ground and starts gnawing at it in an attempt to blend in. The Komodo's stop looking at Owen.

"Never mind, it's working" Noah said. "Of course it is"

One of the Komodo Dragons starts to lick Owen's head.

"I like you too" Owen said, still in his accent.

Owen starts licking the Komodo dragon's head.

 **Team Interview**

"Why... Just why?" Noah said.

"I love making new friends" Owen said. "I'm gonna call him Chewy"

"How are you even still alive?" Noah asked.

 **End Interview**

Owen takes a chewed up bone from one of the Komodo Dragon's and lets the venom drip into a vial he's holding.

"Thanks guys" Owen said to the Komodo Dragon's. "I'll just be going now"

Suddenly one of the Komodo Dragons tackles him. Oddly enough this Komodo doesn't seem to want kill Owen but rather be friends with him.

"Um... A little help Noah?" Owen asked. "I think my friendship plan worked too well"

"He's your boyfriend. You dump him" Noah said.

Meanwhile, Rock and Spud are hiding in the bushes. Rock is holding a bucket of water.

"Okay, on the count of three we jump out and put out the fire breath of that dragon" Rock said.

Spud gives Rock the thumbs up.

"Let's do this" Spud said.

Tom and Jen walk over to the Rockers.

"Um... What are you doing?" Jen asked.

"And why do you have a bucket of water?" Tom asked.

"Oh, we need to put out this dragon's fire breath" Spud said.

"Pretty sure that this isn't that type of dragon" Jen said.

"There's only one type of dragon" Spud said.

 **Team Interview**

"Those two aren't the brightest are they?" Tom said.

"And to think they're our sort-of-enemies" Jen said.

 **End Interview**

"Now if you excuse us, we have a dragon to slay" Rock said.

"Yeah!" Spud exclaimed.

"We're surrounded by idiots" Tom said.

Rock and Spud jump out of the bush they're in and throw their bucket of water into the face of a Komodo Dragon. The Dragons starts choking from the water throw in its face and it coughs up a small puddle. Spud some of the puddle into his vial.

"Done!" Spud said.

 **Team Interview**

"I stand corrected" Tom said.

"Their plan worked surprisingly well" Jen said.

 **End Interview**

Meanwhile, Dwayne and Junior are slowly approaching a sleeping Komodo Dragon.

"Junior, I don't want to sound "Uncool" but I think you should keep your distance" Dwayne said. "These animals are a bit dangerous"

"But I wanted to see one up close" Junior said.

"It's all fun an games until someone gets Komodo Dragon venom in their eye" Dwayne said. "You need to stand back"

Cut to Junior talking to the camera with Dwayne getting closer to the Komodo Dragon in the background.

"Usually I'd disagree with him" Junior said. "But he's right about this. I learned about these animals in school so I think a middle-aged dad with a woman's tattoo has a better chance than me"

In the background the Komodo Dragon wakes up and starts chasing Dwayne.

"Run Junior! It'll come after you next!" Dwayne yelled.

Meanwhile, Sanders and MacArthur are still up in a tree.

"They haven't moved in a while" Sanders said. "That may be a good sign. Let me try something"

Sanders takes a mango off the tree and drops it down to where the Komodo's are. One of the Komodo Dragon's picks it up with their mouth and throws it back at Sanders.

"Looks like this is it for us" MacArthur said. "In terms of the race and our lives"

"Well then there's something I need to confess" Sanders said.

"Same here partner" MacArthur said. "I need you to know-"

"Me first. I just hope you don't think less of me" Sanders said. "One time at a fast food place I bought a burger and fries. They only charged me for the burger, not the fries. I only realized it once I got home, and then... I didn't go back"

Sanders starts crying.

"That's it?" MacArthur asked. "Fries? I was expecting something like: I killed a man in 2008. Or, I was abducted by aliens when I was a teenager. Or, I'm secretly a Russian spy sent to infiltrate the Canadian Government. Something good"

"I know, but it feels so good to get that off my chest" Sanders said. "Now your turn"

"Okay" MacArthur said. "I faked my way into cadet school, I have a rap sheet a mile long, my real name is Valentina Escobar, and I've been smuggling fruits and vegetables across the border since I was five"

"You've what!?" Sanders exclaimed.

"And I hope you don't think less of me" MacArthur said.

Meanwhile Rock and Spud give their vial of venom to the local boy.

"Here you go man" Rock said.

Don walks over to them.

"Hold on" Don said.

Don takes the vial from Rock. He examines it.

"This is mostly just water" Don said. "Try pulling another fast one like this and you're out of the race. Got it?"

"Wait, what did we do?" Spud asked.

"I think we used too much water" Rock said.

Meanwhile, Jacques is walking up to a Komodo Dragon.

"Okay Jacques, you can handle a venomous reptile" Jacques said nervously. "I've skated of Josee for years"

"I can year you" Josee said.

"Sorry" Jacques said.

Jacques slowly gets closer to the sleeping Komodo Dragon.

"Almost there" Jacques said.

Suddenly a loud rumbling noise is heard and the Komodo Dragon wakes up. Josee and Jacques are then trampled by a stampede of Komodo Dragon's.

"What just happened..." Josee said weakly.

Crimson and Ennui walk past the Ice Dancers.

"Come back, you cowards" Crimson said to the stampede of Komodo's.

Josee and Jacques get off the ground.

"This is hopeless" Josee said. "It's time to forget about the challenge and focus on destroying the others"

"Just because it worked once doesn't mean it will work again" Jacques said.

"Just follow my lead" Josee said.

Josee and Jacques run up to the Goths.

"That rabbit of yours is so darling" Josee said to Ennui.

"I used to carry one around just like it" Jacques said.

"Loki isn't darling" Ennui said.

"He's a beacon of famine" Crimson said.

"But still, he must be terrified" Josee said. "Those Komodo's are just waiting to eat him up"

"One wrong move and he's dragon food" Jacques said. "Best to get him out of here"

"Hmm... Let's see what Loki has to say" Crimson said. "Ennui link with him"

"What?" Josee asked.

Crimson picks up Loki and hold him up to Ennui's forehead.

"Loki is refusing to leave" Ennui said. "He has... Another idea"

 **Team Interview**

"I can't believe they're taking orders from a rabbit" Jacques said.

"They might as well pack their bags because they're gonna be in last place" Josee said.

 **End Interview**

Loki is up in a tree with a pile of Mangos next to him. He throws a mango towards a sleeping Komodo Dragon. The Dragon tries to get Loki up in the tree up can't quite seem to reach. The Komodo's drool is puddling on to the ground.

 **Team Interview**

"Loki knows no fear" Crimson said.

Loki growls.

 **End Interview**

Crimson and Ennui walk over to the Komodo causing it to run away.

"Yes... Smell your defeat" Crimson said.

Ennui collects the venom in a vial.

"Let's get out of here" Ennui said.

Crimson and Ennui leave. Once they are gone Josee and Jacques stick their head out from behind a nearby rock to reveal they were watching the whole time.

"That is one terrifying bunny" Josee said.

"Well that plan backfired" Jacques said.

"Who cares, they left us what we need" Josee said.

Josee walks over to the puddle of Komodo drool and puts it in her vial.

Meanwhile, Crimson and Ennui give their vial of venom to the kid. He gives them a the next travel tip.

"Hmm... It says Meet Your Loom" Crimson read.

"Is that a typo?" Ennui asked.

Cut to Don standing next to a pile of rugs.

"No it's not" Don said. "Indonesia is known for making textiles. Lot's and lots of textiles. Somewhere in these piles are ten Ridonculous Race Rugs"

Don grabs a rug and unfurls it to reveal a image of the globe on it.

"Once each team grabs one only then can they go to the Carpet of Completion" Don said. "And as I've said many times before: The last team here may be out of the race"

Meanwhile, Laurie and Miles are slowly approaching another Komodo Dragon.

"Okay, let's be more careful this time" Miles said.

"Right" Laurie said.

"Since it's asleep we shouldn't have too much trouble" Miles said.

"Here's the plan" Laurie said. "You get the venom and I'll make sure that-"

Laurie steps on a stick on the ground and it breaks. The noise causes the Komodo Dragon to wake up and hiss at Laurie and Miles.

"Run for it!" Miles exclaimed.

 **Team Interview**

"I really wish animals respected the fact that I don't eat them" Miles said.

 **End Interview**

Meanwhile, Sanders and MacArthur are still up in a tree.

"I've don it all. Jaywalking, loitering, I even drove through a red light once" MacArthur said. "So, uh, we're cool right?"

"Help!" Sanders yelled.

"Yeah, I guess we should have done that an hour ago" MacArthur said.

"Help!" The both of them shouted.

Meanwhile, Rock and Spud are in the bushes watching a Komodo.

"Okay, this time we don't use the water" Rock said.

"Got it man" Spud said.

Tom and Jen walk up to the Rockers.

"Hey, didn't you guys already get the venom?" Tom asked.

"Turns out it was mostly water" Rock said.

"Oh... I was just about to go get some water" Jen said.

"Yeah, don't do that thing" Spud said.

"So what are you doing now?" Tom asked.

"We're about to try again" Spud said.

"Wait, I think I just heard something" Rock said.

"Help!" Sanders and MacArthur shouted from a distance.

"Should we help them?" Spud asked.

"I guess so" Rock said.

Rock and Spud get out of the bush and run towards the sound of the screams.

"Should we follow them?" Jen asked.

"I've got nothing better to do" Tom said.

The Rockers and Fashion Bloggers run up to where the Police Cadets are.

"So what do we do?" Tom asked.

"Charge!" Spud yelled.

Spud blindly charges at the Komodo Dragons. The Dragons start chasing Spud.

"Run for it man!" Spud exclaimed.

The Komodo's start chasing the others too.

Cut to later where the Fashion Bloggers and Rockers are now up in the tree.

"Well now we have to deal with this again" Tom said.

"You're both idiots" Jen said.

"Hey I'm not an idiot!" Spud said angrily. "Wait, what's an idiot?"

Meanwhile, the Goths and Ice Dancers are looking at rugs. Ennui looks at a rug with a skull on it.

"I like it... But it's not the one we're looking for" Ennui said.

"That's a shame" Crimson said.

Meanwhile, Owen is still lying on the ground with the Komodo sleeping on top of him.

"Help..." Owen said nervously.

"I am not going near that thing" Noah said.

Meanwhile, Emma and Kitty are getting closer to a Komodo Dragon that's sleeping.

"Okay, I'll hold it down while you get the venom" Emma said.

"That's the easy job" Kitty said.

"No it's not" Emma said. "You get the easy job"

"I'm pretty sure having to put your hand near the mouth of a venomous reptile is dangerous" Kitty said.

"Listen, we can argue about this later" Emma said.

Emma and Kitty look at the Komodo to see that it is now awake.

"Uh oh, this looks bad" Kitty said.

"Run!" Emma exclaimed.

Meanwhile at the Chill Zone, Don is waiting for the teams.

"Man, this has been our most dangerous challenge yet" Don said. "I'm getting the feeling that there are going to be a few lawsuits against us"

Crimson and Ennui arrive at the Chill Zone with their rug.

"Congratulations Goths!" Don said. "First place!"

Josee and Jacques run over to Don.

"What!" Josee exclaimed. "Silver again! This race is fixed"

Josee hits Jacques with her rug out of anger.

 **Team Interview**

"I can't believe those pasty faced freaks took gold!" Josee said angrily. "I bet they're just loving it"

"Are you okay Josee?" Jacques asked.

"I'm fine!" Josee shouted.

 **Second Interview**

"We won... Yay, I guess" Crimson said unenthusiastically.

 **End Interview**

Laurie and Miles run over to the Chill Zone next.

"Third!" Don announced.

Emma and Kitty are the next ones to arrive at the Chill Zone.

"Fourth!" Don said.

Carrie and Devin run up to Don.

"Fifth!" Don announced.

Dwayne and Junior make it to the Chill Zone next.

"Sixth!" Don Announced.

Meanwhile, Noah has approached the sleeping Komodo that's on top of Owen. Noah snaps his fingers to try and wake the Dragon.

"Hello? Are you in there?" Noah asked.

Elsewhere, the Police Cadets, Rockers, and Fashion Bloggers are up in the tree surrounded by Komodo Dragons.

"We need a diversion" Sanders said. "If we throw something that smells like one of us they might go after it"

"Ooh, I know what to do" Jen said.

Jen takes a small bottle of perfume out of her pocket.

"This is my favourite perfume" Jen said. "I always wear it"

"Are you sure you want to get rid of it?" Tom asked.

"I don't know yet..." Jen said.

"It's either lose your perfume or be eaten alive" Rock said.

"He has a point" MacArthur siad.

"Fine" Jen said.

Jen throws her bottle of perfume away from herself and it smashes on the ground. The Komodo's follow the scent.

"Let's get out of here" Spud said.

Back with the Reality TV Pros the Komodo on top of Owen hasn't moved.

"Come on, try and move" Noah said. "We're going to be in last place"

Owen looks up and sees that the Komodo Dragon is drooling.

"Oh no! Chewy's drooling in his sleep" Owen said.

Some of the drool falls into Owen's eye.

"Ah! Get it out!" Owen exclaimed. "The venom's in my eye!"

Owen gets a sudden burst of energy and manages to get the Komodo off of him.

"Run!" Owen said. "I need a doctor!"

Meanwhile, the Fashion Bloggers, Rockers, and Police Cadets are hiding in the bushes together.

"Okay, I think you all have atrocious taste in fashion" Tom said. "But if we all want to come in anything but last we need to work together"

"We just need to work on not being burned by its fire breath" Spud said.

"What?" MacArthur asked.

"It's a dragon" Spud said.

"I hate to break it to you... But this is a different kind of dragon" Sanders said. "It doesn't breathe fire"

"Oh... Now I have a great idea" Spud said. "TAXI!"

A taxi pulls up.

"Why is there a taxi in the jungle?" Jen asked.

"I don't know" Rock said. "It's best not to think about to too hard"

Spud gets in the taxi.

"Hey man, do you mind, like, rolling down the window" Spud asked.

"Okay" The driver said.

The driver rolls down the window of the taxi.

"Thanks man" Spud said.

Spud honks the horn of the cab which alerts a nearby Komodo. The Komodo Dragon sticks its head through the window. Spud rolls the window back up and the Dragon gets its head stuck. He then collects the saliva in his vial. Spud exits the cab.

"The rest of you guys can get the rest yourself" Spud said.

 **Team Interview**

"Way to go Spud!" Rock said. "You did something useful!"

"Wait, really? When?" Spud asked.

"Just earlier" Rock said.

"Oh yeah... I remember that" Spud said. "Woo! I'm useful!"

 **End Interview**

Noah and Owen are now in the area with the rugs.

"Okay" Noah said. "I'll search this pile and you-"

Noah looks over and sees that Owen is walking away from him due to the venom in his eye confusing him. Owen trips over a rug and falls to the ground.

"Ow! I landed on my keys" Owen exclaimed.

"New plan" Noah said. " I search and you try not to hurt yourself"

"Let's do this!" Owen yelled.

Owen gets off the ground and starts running. He crashes into a pile of rugs. The rugs fall on top of the both of them. Owen climbs out of the pile of rugs holding the Ridonculous Race Rug.

"Hey Noah, I found it!" Owen cheered.

Owen looks around and doesn't see Noah.

"Noah?" Owen asked.

"I have no idea where I am" Noah said.

The Fashion Bloggers, Rockers, and Police Cadets arrive at the rug area.

"Let's move it Sanders!" MacArthur exclaimed

"Tom, we'd better find that rug" Jen said. "Otherwise, I'd have lost that perfume for nothing"

"Come on man, let's do this thing" Rock said.

Owen looks more worried.

"I need to find Noah" Owen said nervously.

All the remaining teams are nervously looking through the piles of rugs.

"Ooh, this one looks real stylish" Tom said. "It's an absolutely fabulous rug. I might want to buy it after the race"

"Not the time, Tom" Jen said.

"Right" Tom said.

Jen pulls the right rug out of the pile.

"I found it" Jen said.

"Good, let's leave" Tom said.

The camera pans to Sandes searching through a pile.

"Hey MacArthur, I found one" Sanders said.

Sanders hold up a Ridonculous Race Rug. MacArthur runs over to her partner.

"Let's get out of here" MacArthur said.

The camera pans to the Rockers.

"Hey man, I think I like found the rug" Spud said.

Spud holds up a plain blue rug.

"Nope" Rock said.

"Oh, wrong side" Spud said.

Spud turns around the rug to reveal that it's the correct rug.

"Sweet! Let's get out of this place" Rock said.

Meanwhile, Don is at the Chill Zone.

"It's a four-way race for not last place" Don said. "Who is heading home? It's gonna be close"

The Rockers, Police Cadets, and Fashion Bloggers arrive at the Chill Zone.

"Yeah! We're in the race still!" MacArthur cheered.

"That wasn't close at all" Don said. "Well, I'm off to break the bad news to Noah and Owen"

Back with Owen, he is still digging through rugs to find Noah. Don walks over to him.

"Sorry fellas, as the last team to finish, you've been eliminated" Don said.

"Yeah, I figured that out" Owen said.

"Well enjoy the flight home" Don said in a sudden cheery tone.

Don leaves. Emma runs over to the rug area.

"Noah! I need to say goodbye" Emma said.

Emma starts searching through the rugs.

"If I could find you I would kiss you" Emma said.

Noah crawls out of nearby pile of rugs.

"Here I am!" Noah exclaimed.

"Why didn't I think of that" Owen said.

"You meet me at the final Chill Zone after the race and we'll go on our first date" Emma said.

"What about the whole I'd totally kiss you thing?" Noah asked.

Emma kisses Noah on the lips. She pulls away.

"Happy now?" Emma asked.

"Yes" Noah said. "Come on Owen, let's go back to Canada"

Owen helps Noah off the ground.

"You got it little buddy" Owen said.

Clips of Noah and Owen competing play while they narrate over it.

"As reality show go that was about as real as it gets" Owen said as a clip of Noah using him as a raft in France played.

"Before this started I didn't have a girlfriend, and now I do. So this show is an easy favourite" Noah said over a clip of him talking to Emma while parachuting in China.

"I mean, the million would be nice. But money isn't everything" Owen said as a clip of him driving the Jeep covered in animals in Alberta.

"And I'm dating a lawyer. Which means I'll never have to work again" Noah said as the footage switched to them walking away.

"I bet Emma's gonna love hearing that" Owen joked. "So what reality show should we do next?"

"Didn't I tell you?" Noah asked. "We've been asked to do the next season of-"

The footage suddenly cuts out.

* * *

 **This chapter probably had a lot more action going on than in other chapters which is also why it is surprisingly long. I had fun writing it though. As for the elimination, I didn't see too much of a reason to change it. Also, here's a fun fact, this is the first time since the chapter "Hello and Dubai" that the elimination was the same as canon. Let me know what you think.**


	19. Dude Buggies

"Last time on the Ridonculous Race. Our final ten teams went to Flores Indonesia. There were dragons, poison, great displays of bravery, and a little bit of cuddling. The Ice Dancers tried to cheat their way into first but Crimson and Ennui won by a hare. Which is a fancy way of saying rabbit. And sadly Owen and Noah were sent home after failing to reach the carpet. I mean, they reached a carpet... Just not the right one. But today is a new day and anything can happen. This is: The Ridonculous Race!"

Don is at the Chill Zone in Flores.

"Welcome back to Flores Indonesia" Don said. "Yesterday's winners Crimson and Ennui are getting ready to take their travel tip"

Crimson walks over to the Don Box and takes the travel tip.

"We're going to Las Vegas" Crimson said.

"Whatever" Ennui said.

Cut to a background of the American flag with a picture of Las Vegas at night to go with it.

"Located in Nevada USA Las Vegas is known for its bright lights, colourful entertainment, and terrible Elvis impersonators" Don narrated.

Cut to Don in the Nevada desert next to a Don Box.

"And our remaining teams won't see any of it" Don said. "Instead they'll head right past Vegas and to this desert Don Box to get their next tip"

Cut to the teams rushing towards their plane a knocking over an employee of the airport.

"Sorry about that" Carrie said.

The scene shifts to a plane in the air.

"Thanks to some clever editing and stock footage this eight hour flight will only take a few seconds" Don said via voice over. "You're welcome"

Cut to the plane landing in Las Vegas. All the teams run out of the airport and get in cabs.

The scene shifts to the inside of Ennui and Crimspn's taxi.

"Not the worst place we've been" Crimson said.

"Agreed" Ennui said. "We particularly like the city's overwhelming feeling of sadness"

Suddenly another taxi hits theirs.

Crimson looks behind her to see that Josee and Jacques' cab had rammed into them.

"Hit them again!" Josee yelled at the driver.

"Listen lady" The driver said. "I'm not sure if-"

"I'll pay you double" Josee said.

"Fine" The driver said.

The driver rams into the Goths' taxi again.

 **Team Interview**

"Coming in second again is bad enough" Josee said. "But losing to the Goths is unacceptable. I'm on to them now. And I'll do anything it takes to bring them down. That's why I picked up these"

Josee takes a clove of garlic and a wooden stake off the ground.

"Garlic and a wooden stake" Josee said.

"Josee, you're losing it" Jacques said. "They aren't vampires. They're just really pale"

"Are they Jacques?" Josee asked. "Are they?!"

 **End Interview**

Meanwhile, inside Rock and Spud's taxi.

"We got a bit distracted by those fashion guys and dragons in the last challenge" Rock said.

"Yeah, but there are no Dragon's in Vegas" Spud said. "At least I think so"

"I haven't checked but I'm pretty sure there aren't" Rock said.

"I'll keep an eye out just in case" Spud said.

Meanwhile, Devin is trying to call a cab while Carrie watches him. Carrie turns to the camera.

"Devin has finally made it through all the stages of heartbreak" Carrie said. "It was tough to put aside my own needs in order to support Devin. But now that he's over Shelly I can't wait to tell him how I feel and let the magic happen"

 **Team Interview**

"I'll admit it. I was totally depressed for a while" Devin said. "But I'm totally over my break up with Shelly. And there's only one thing that matters now"

Carrie blushes and leans towards Devin.

"Winning the race" Devin said.

Carrie falls over.

"I'm okay..." Carrie said weakly.

 **End Interview**

A broken down taxi pulls up to Carrie and Devin.

"Thanks for stopping" Devin said.

"Um... This one looks kind of old and slow" Carrie said. "Maybe we should take the next one"

"Carrie, a cab's a cab" Devin said. "Come on. Plus, they're the only ones that have stopped"

Carrie and Devin get in their taxi.

"Now step on it!" Devin exclaimed.

"You got it chief" The dirver said.

The driver hits the gas pedal and the cab starts moving very slowly.

"This might take a little while by the way" The driver said.

Meanwhile, Emma and Kitty are getting into a cab.

"Noah hated cabs" Emma said nostalgically. "He called them germ incubators. So Noah... Ugh! I keep falling into Noah dazes. Kitty, every once and a while you may have to slap me"

Kitty slaps her sister.

"I meant when I get all distracted" Emma said.

"Hey, if you're gonna be a lawyer you gotta learn to be more specific" Kitty said. "Hey look at that. I can see an outline of my hand on your face. Whoops"

Kitty takes a photo of Emma.

Meanwhile, Rock and Spud are the first ones to reach the Don Box.

"All right man, let's do this thing" Rock said.

Rock goes to the Don Box and takes the travel tip. Tom and Jen make it to the Don Box next.

"Yes, we got second place" Tom said.

Tom takes a travel tip from the Don Box.

"It's an Either-Or" Tom read.

"Dune Buggy Bonanza or Magic Show" Rock read.

Cut to Don standing by a race track.

"In this Either-Or teams can either race dune buggies around this track and collect three flags in under a minute" Don explained. "Or..."

Cut to a magic show's stage that Don is standing on. On the stage is a very serious looking magician and a lion inside a glass cage.

"Perform a classic trick from a Vegas magic show and make a lion disappear for this judge" Don explained. "Complete either task and it's a foot race to-"

The lion suddenly growls at Don and scares him.

"Gah!" Don exclaimed.

Cut to the Chill Zone where Don is.

"The Chill Zone" Don finished. "As always the last team here could be heading home empty handed"

Cut back to the Fashion Bloggers and Rockers deciding what to do.

"What should we do?" Rock asked.

"I say buggies because you need to go to that magic school to do magic" Spud said.

"Can't argue with that reasoning" Rock said.

"You two aren't that smart are you?" Jen asked.

"Hey, what's that supposed to mean?" Spud asked. "Seriously tell me what it means. I wasn't paying attention"

"Now's not the time Spud" Rock said.

"Sorry" Spud said

"What should we do?" Tom asked.

"I'm no good at magic so I say we do the buggies" Jen said.

"Good plan" Tom said.

The Rockers and Fashion Bloggers leave the Don Box. Once they leave Sanders and MacArthur get to the Don Box and take their travel tips.

"We are totally doing the dune buggies" MacArthur said.

Crimson and Ennui reach the Don Box next and receive their travel tip.

"Magic" Crimson said flatly.

"Agreed" Ennui said.

Josee and Jacques run over to the Don Box next. Josee presses the button on the Don Box but nothing happens. She reaches behind Jacques' ear and pulls out the travel tip.

"Magic" Josee said.

Emma and Kitty make it to the Don Box. Emma takes the travel tip.

"Noah would have loved the magic show" Emma said. "He-"

Kitty slaps Emma.

"Focus!" Kitty shouted. "Sorry... I just got caught up in the moment"

"Buggies" Emma said.

Dwayne and Junior are the next ones to the Don Box. Dwayne takes a travel tip.

"Let's do the dune buggies" Junior said.

"Now hold on son" Dwayne said. "That sounds like it could be a bit dangerous"

"The other challenge has lions" Junior said.

"Dune buggies it is" Dwayne said.

Laurie and Miles run up to the Don Box and get their travel tip.

"Ooh, can we do magic?" Miles asked. "I love magic"

"Why not" Laurie said.

Meanwhile at the race track, the Rockers and Fashion Bloggers are the first ones there. They stop at a watchtower and look at their travel tips.

"It says one of us has to collect three flags in one minute or less" Rock read.

"One of us controls the buggy from this watch tower" Jen read. "And the other one stays inside the buggy to collect the flags"

"If the buggy crashes or loses its passenger we have to start over" Rock said.

"Dibs on riding the buggy" Spud said.

"Aw... I was hoping to do the fun part" Rock said.

"Yeah, I'm not riding that cart of certain death" Jen said. "Tom, you take care of that"

A look of nervousness creeps over Tom's face.

"Yeah... Sure" Tom said.

Meanwhile, Laurie and Miles arrive at the magic area.

"What do we do?" Laurie asked.

"The assistant goes into one side of the cage and the lion is in the other" Laurie read. "The cage gets covered and the magician puts the lever in right position to drop the devider and the lion off the stage. That way nobody gets mauled"

"I call being the assistant" Miles said. "You hardly ever get the chance to so close to a lion"

"Good. Because that lion scares me" Laurie said.

Meanwhile, Carrie and Devin are inside their incredibly broken down taxi cab.

"Man, this taxi is so slow" Carrie said.

"Hey driver, at the next cactus turn west" Devin said.

The driver gives Devin the thumbs up.

Cut to Devin talking to the camera with the taxi parked in the background.

"Now that I'm done with my ex winning this race is all I have left" Devin said. "I'm gonna kick it so far into overdrive they'll come up with a new word for it. Like doubledrive. Doubleoverdrive? Oh, Devindrive"

Back at the race track the Rockers and Fashion Bloggers are getting ready to drive.

"Are you ready?" Rock asked.

"Totally!" Spud cheered.

"Um... Jen, are you ready?" Tom asked.

"I'm not completely sure how the controls work but I think I can pick up on it" Jen said.

"Let's do this thing!" Spud exclaimed.

Both Tom and Spud start driving with the help of their partners.

"Okay... Not sure what I'm doing but so far so good" Jen said.

Both buggies go over a hill. Spud grabs a flag Tom tries hand misses.

"Damn it!" Tom exclaimed.

Tom's buggy suddenly speeds out of control and crashes into Spud's buggy.

"What just happened?" Spud asked.

"Yeah, I was driving just fine" Tom said.

"Sorry, that was me" Jen said. "Still getting used to these controls"

 **Team Interview**

"We're not really into video games or remote control toys" Jen said.

"It just makes you look very unprofessional" Tom said.

 **End Interview**

Sanders and MacArthur arrive at the race track.

"Strap in Sanders! I'll do the driving" MacArthur said.

"You got it" Sanders said.

 **Team Interview**

"As police cadets we've been taught to ignore all the rules of the road" MacArthur said. "Speed limits, traffic lights, paying attention. Those rules are for civilians"

"But you'll pay attention right?" Sanders asked.

MacArthur remains silent.

 **End Interview**

Emma and Kitty make it to the race track.

"Which one of us should drive?" Kitty asked.

"You're better at video games than me but can you handle it?" Emma asked.

"I think so" Kitty said.

 **Team Interview**

"I used to be obsessed with video games" Kitty said. "One time I played Hockey All Star for two days straight. I would have kept going but Emma unplugged my Gamestation and refused to plug it back in until I took a shower"

"She smelled like a bag of wet popcorn" Emma said.

"Not my finest hour" Kitty said.

 **End Interview**

Back at the magic show area Laurie has put on gloves, a top hat, and a bow tie. Miles is wearing a blue sequin dress.

"All right, I'm dressed" Laurie said.

"Me too" Miles said. "I think this is a good look for me"

Jacques exits a nearby door wearing a purple sequin dress.

"Ooh, I like this" Jacques said.

"Oh dear God... I can not unsee that" Laurie said.

"I know, I look great" Jacques said.

 **Team Interview**

"I have no problem being the assistant here" Jacques said. "When we skate I'm always the magician"

"Say what?" Josee asked.

"I lift you, carry you, twirl you around. All you need to do is smile and not fall down" Jacques said.

"Wow, I hope I do this trick right" Josee said. "I'd hate to see you... Get eaten by a lion!"

 **End Interview**

Jacques is inside the box with the lion on the other side. He looks nervous.

"Okay Josee... Pull the lever" Jacques said fearfully.

Josee pulls the lever and a curtain lowers over the box.

"Abraca-Gold!" Josee exclaimed.

She pulls the lever again. The curtain raises and reveals that the divider is gone but the lion isn't. The lion has cornered Jacques.

"Josee could you put the divider back!" Jacques yelled. "Please hurry!"

The lion growls at Jacques.

"It's terrifying in here!" Jacques shouted.

The magician judge gives them a thumbs down.

"Just great!" Josee exclaimed angrily.

Cut to Josee talking to the camera with Jacques standing in the background.

"The worst part is we have to give the other teams a shot before trying again" Josee said.

"That's the worst part? Really? I was attacked by a lion!" Jacques said.

Cut to Miles getting inside the box with the lion.

"Hi lion" Miles said. "You're such a majestic creature"

"Are you ready Miles?" Laurie asked.

"Yes" Miles said.

Laurie pulls the lever and the curtain lowers over the box. Laurie lifts up the curtain to reveal that the divider is gone but he lion is still there.

"Ah! Bad lion!" Miles exclaimed.

The judge gives them the thumbs down.

 **Team Interview**

"Yeah that could have gone better" Laurie said.

"You think?"Miles asked.

 **End Interview**

Back at the Don Box Carrie and Devin finally arrive.

"Oh thank God we finally made it" Carrie said.

Devin takes a travel tip.

"It's a Either-Or" Devin read. "Buggy Bonanza or Magic Show.

"Ooh, magic show! Awesome!" Carrie exclaimed. "We could do a real magic trick on an actual Las Vegas stage. That would be incredible"

"Dune buggies could be tough but magic sounds easy so... It's probably super hard" Devin said. "Buggies it is"

"Really?" Carrie asked. "I don't know"

"Well if you don't know what you want and I want the buggies I guess we do the buggies" Devin said.

Devin runs off.

"No wait!" Carrie exclaimed. "Wow, now I am actually starting to question what I want"

The camera pans to Devin running and talking to the camera.

"Man, it feels good to be back in control" Devin said. "Totally focused on the race I feel like I'm-"

Devin runs into a cactus due to his lack of focus.

"Spoke too soon..." Devin said weakly.

Back at the track the Police Cadets and Sisters have joined the race with the Rockers and Fashion Bloggers. Emma and Sanders drive over the hill and grab the flags.

The camera pans up to the tower.

"Yes!" Kitty exclaimed.

"Okay... Just need to figure out which button on this remote speeds up my buggy" Jen said.

Jen presses a button on the controls and then a loud crash is heard.

"Damn it Jen!" Tom shouted from out of view.

"Dude, you just crashed into Spud" Rock said.

Dwayne looks nervously at Jen and adjusts his headset.

"Uh, son, you might want to stay away from those fashion fellows" Dwayne said.

"You're the one driving, dad" Junior said from the ground.

Meanwhile, at the magic stage Crimson is in the cage with the lion.

"I'm ready" Crimson said flatly.

Ennui pulls the lever and lowers the curtain. He pulls the the lever in another direction and the curtain lifts up to reveal that the divider is gone but the lion still remains. The lion roars at Crimson but she has no reaction.

"Try harder next time" Crimson said to the lion.

The judge gives them a thumbs down.

Back at the race track Sanders is approaching a flag. Emma cuts off Sanders and grabs the flag.

The camera pans up to the control tower.

"Hey! You cut me off!" MacArthur said to Kitty. "Nobody cuts me off!"

"I'm just trying to get flags" Kitty said. "Same as you. Let it go"

"Let it go? Let it go!?" MacArthur said angrily. "Oh it is on!"

MacArthur slams Kitty against a nearby wall while still trying to control her teams' buggy.

"You're gonna have a hard time taking pictures when I snap those arms off!" MacArthur said.

"Back off mall cop!" Kitty said angrily. "I've got a brown belt in fusion kickboxing yoga!"

"Ha! Bring it on!" MacArthur said.

"Oh it's already brung! Brought? Whatever!" Kitty said.

Kitty slams MacArthur against the other wall. MacArthur pushes Kitty away.

"Whoa, it's a cat fight" Rock said. "Get it? 'Cause her name's Kitty"

"We got it" Jen said.

"We just didn't laugh" Dwayne said

Back on the road Sanders' buggy slams into Emma's.

"Hey! Quit it!" Emma said.

"MacArthur! What gives?" Sanders said into her headphone mouthpiece.

 **Team Interview**

"I never let anything go" MacArthur said. "When I was six my babysitter forgot to give me dessert. Which she promised"

"What did you do to her?" Sanders asked.

"Nothing... Yet" MacArthur said. "I know where you live Jennifer Masterson"

 **Second Interview**

"Maybe putting you in charge of the controller isn't the best idea" Emma said to her sister.

"Of course it is, I'm on fire!" Kitty said.

"One time Kitty lost online and she smashed the console... And the living room" Emma said.

"Things got a little out of hand but I'm cool" Kitty said. "I swear, I've got this"

 **End Interview**

Sanders and Emma grab the last flag. They look up at the timer and realize they've gone over the time limit.

"Hey guys, do you think you could cool it with the fighting?" Emma asked.

Back at the stage Crimson and Ennui are trying the trick again.

"Are you ready?" Ennui asked.

"Whatever" Crimson said.

Ennui pulls the lever and the divider drops. Loki hops off of Ennui's shoulder and into the box. Loki jumps right into the lions mouth.

"Ha! That is hilarious" Josee said. "Oh, I mean, so sorry for your loss"

Ennui climbs into the box with the lion. The lion roars at Ennui. He just reaches into the lion's mouth and pulls out Loki.

"Done" Ennui said.

The judge gives him the thumbs up.

"Ugh!" Josee said angrily. "That is it!"

Josee hold up the wooden stake. Jacques grabs his partner's hand.

 **Team Interview**

"Judge said it was the best trick he'd ever seen" Ennui said.

"He offered us eight shows a week" Crimson said. "We said no"

"Just wearing out happy faces for these cameras is exhausting" Ennui said.

 **End Interview**

Kitty is trying to control her teams' buggy. MacArthur pushes her out of the way.

"Out of my way!" MacArthur exclaimed.

"You get out of my way!" Kitty yelled.

Kitty pushes MacArthur away.

Back on the track both of their partner's vehicles are moving erratically.

"MacArthur! Quit it!" Sanders yelled.

"I'm getting carsick!" Emma exclaimed.

 **Team Interview**

"Reckless driving is fun when it's not your own vehicle you're smashing up" MacArthur said. "Or your own body"

 **End Interview**

Up in the tower Kitty and MacArthur are still fighting.

"Why can't you just let this go!" Kitty said angrily.

"I never let anything go!" MacArthur said angrily.

"Done!" Jen exclaimed.

"Wait what?" Kitty asked.

"Oh yeah, while you were busy fighting I finished driving" Jen said.

"Yeah, me too" Rock said.

"Oh come on!" MacArthur said angrily.

MacArthur pushes Kitty to the ground in anger.

Back at the stage, Josee and Jacques are performing their magic trick again.

"This time, we nail it" Josee said as she pulled the lever.

The curtain lowers over the cage. She moves the lever and the curtain lifts up to reveal that the lion is biting Jacques' leg.

"Make the pain stop..." Jacques said, clearly repressing pain.

The judge gives them the thumbs down.

"What's with you? Are you hiding hamburgers in your dress?" Josee asked angrily.

"It's not my fault, I'm irresistible" Jacques said. "It must be my natural manly musk"

"Yeah that's it" Josee said, clearly not caring. "All right let's try this again"

Back at the race track Junior's buggy isn't driving too well.

"What's going on with this thing?" Junior asked.

"Sorry sport, video games just aren't my thing!" Dwayne shouted down.

Junior's buggy crashes into a rock.

"Meh, it could be worse" Junior said.

Devin's buggy speed's past him while spinning wildly out of control.

"Carrie!" Devin shouted.

"That, for example" Junior said.

The camera pans up to the control tower.

"It's not my fault Devin! This controller is broken!" Carrie exclaimed.

"Uh, pretty sure you're holding that upside down" Dwayne said.

"Oh... Now I feel silly" Carrie said.

Back on the stage, Laurie and Miles are attempting to do the magic act.

"I'm ready" Miles said.

"Great" Laurie said.

Laurie pulls the lever and the curtain lowers. She pulls the lever again but it won't lift up.

"Uh oh, I don't think this is supposed to happen" Laurie said.

"Ah!" Miles screamed from inside the box. "What's going on out there"

"I'm trying to fix it" Laurie said.

Some punching noises are heard from under the curtain.

"That doesn't sound good" Laurie said.

Laurie pulls the lever and the curtain lifts up. When the curtain is gone it is revealed that Miles has beaten up the lion and it is slowly falling into the open panel inthe floor. Miles stomps on it and it falls in completely.

"Sorry lion" Miles said.

The judge gives them a thumbs up.

 **Team Interview**

"I hated hurting that poor lion" Miles said. "But if I had to choose between being mauled to death and having some guys from PETA throw red paint on me... I choose the latter"

"Good choice" Laurie said.

 **End Interview**

At the race track Emma and Sanders' cars are trying to drive around the track. Emma's buggy rams into Sanders' buggy.

"Kitty! This is our sixth attempt" Emma said. "Calm it with the demolition derby!"

"You too MacArthur" Sanders said.

The camera pans up to the control tower where MacArthur has Kitty in a headlock.

"Oh yeah, because that sounds like me" MacArthur said.

Back at the magic stage the Ice Dancers attempt the magic trick again.

"You ready for this?" Josee asked.

"No..." Jacques said nervously.

"Too bad" Josee said as she pulled the lever and lowered the curtains.

She pulls the lever again to raise the curtains. When the curtains are up it is revealed that Jacques' head is now in the lions mouth.

"Seriously" Josee said.

"Dune buggies! Please!" Jacques exclaimed.

"Fine" Josee said.

"The Ice Dancers have switched challenges" Don explained via voice over. "One can only hope it will go over smoother"

At the race track, Devin's buggy is driving backward.

"Carrie! What are you doing?!" Devin exclaimed.

"I told you! I've never been good at video games" Carrie said.

"You just need to focus!" Devin said.

"No! You just need to stop assuming we always do whatever you want and try listening to me for once!" Carrie said angrily.

Carrie presses the breaks on the controller and Devin crashes into Junior's buggy.

"I'm okay" Junior said.

"I'm not..." Devin said.

Carrie climbs down from the tower.

"It's magic time" Carrie said. "Let's do this"

Cut to Carrie and Devin running through the desert towards the magic stage. They cross paths with Josee and Jacques.

"As the Best Friends and Ice Dancers lose time switching challenges our frontrunner teams have already completed it and are on their way to the Chill Zone" Don narrated.

Cut to the Chill Zone where Don is waiting.

"Huh, could have sworn they'd be here by now" Don said.

Don turns around to see Crimson and Ennui.

"How is anyone that quiet!" Don exclaimed. "Congrats on coming in first again by the way"

Crimson and Ennui walk away.

"Those two need bells around their necks or something" Don said.

Laurie and Miles run over to the Chill Zone next.

"Second place!" Don said.

Rock and Spud arrive after them.

"Third!" Don announced.

Tom and Jen make it to the Chill Zone after them.

"And fourth!" Don said.

Back at the race track Josee is getting into the buggy.

"You take the tower and I take the buggy" Josee said. "Got it?"

"Yes" Jacques said.

Jacques presses the start button on the remote and the buggy drives off.

Cut to Josee talking to the camera while in the buggy.

"Grabbing the flags is the most important part" Josee said. "As if I'm letting Leggy McLionfood do it"

Cut to Jacques talking to the camera.

"I'm surprised Josee gave me the tower considering how much she enjoys looking down on people" Jacques said.

Meanwhile, up in the tower with the other teams.

"Sanders! There's only one flag left!" MacArthur said.

"Don't miss it Emma!" Kitty said.

"You too Junior" Dwayne said.

Cut to the ground where Emma, Sanders, and Junior are racing towards a bunch of flags on a wooden post. Once they get close enough they each grab a flag.

"Yes! We did it Emma!" Kitty cheered.

"Let's roll Sanders!" MacArthur said.

"Way to go Junior" Dwayne siad.

 **Team Interview**

"I'm proud of my sister for completing that challenge without breaking anything" Emma said. "Especially me"

"Aw... Thank you" Kitty said.

 **Second Interview**

"I would have never pegged Kitty as the type to have all that rage" MacArthur said. "That makes me like her more"

 **End Interview**

Back at the magic stage, Carrie and Devin are getting ready for the challenge.

"Come on, we gotta hurry" Devin said. "I don't want to go home"

"Neither do I, that's why we switched" Carrie said. "Now let's get out there"

Back at the Chill Zone, Sanders and MacArthur arrive.

"Fifth!" Don announced.

Emma and Kitty make it to the Chill Zone next.

"Sixth!" Don said.

Dwayne and Junior are the next ones to arrive.

"Seventh!" Don announced. "Only two teams remain in the race. Who will make it here next? The pressure is on"

Back at the stage Carrie and Devin are attempting to do their magic trick.

"Are you ready Carrie?" Devin asked.

"You bet" Carrie said.

"Okay, I can do this" Devin said to himself nervously. "Fingers crossed"

Devin pulls the lever and the curtain lowers over the box.

"So far so good" Devin said.

He pulls the lever again which raises the curtain. It is revealed that Carrie is gone but the lion is not.

"Carrie? Carrie?! Oh boy, this looks bad" Devin said.

Meanwhile, Carrie is under the stage.

"Devin? What's going on up there?" Carrie said.

She looks around and notices she's surrounded by lions.

"Uh oh..." Carrie said nervously.

Meanwhile, back at the race track with Josee and Jacques. Josee finishes going around the tracks with all the flags.

"Are we done?" Josee asked.

She looks over at the clock and sees that it went five seconds over.

"Five seconds over?! Are you kidding me!?" Jacques said angrily.

Back at the stage Devin is frantically running around looking for Carrie.

"Carrie?! Carrie! Where are you!" Devin yelled. "What did I do?! She's my best friend! She's like the most important person in my life. And like- I love her... Whoa, do I? Yeah, I do, I love Carrie"

Devin runs over to the dressing room to see that it's empty.

"Where is she?" Devin asked. "I gotta find her"

Meanwhile Carrie is under the stage holding up a chair to fend off the lions.

"Okay, this is a sign that I need to get over Devin" Carrie said. "It's obviously never going to happen. Oh, I've wasted so much time. Maybe is is time to stand up for myself"

Carrie threatens one of the lions with the chair and starts walking towards the exit.

"No more putting my need aside for what he wants. No more trying to make him see how good we'd look together" Carrie said. "I am moving on!"

The lion bites the legs off the chair.

"Oh no... Help!" Carrie shouted.

Back at the race track Josee crosses the finish line with the three flags in her buggy. She looks at the clock and it says fifty nine seconds.

"I did it!" Josee cheered.

"We just made it under the time!" Jacques said.

"To the Chill Zone" Josee said.

Back at the stage Devin is pulling the lever back and forth in an attempt to get Carrie back.

"Ugh! Work!" Devin exclaimed. "Why won't you work!"

A panel in the cage opens up and Carrie rises from it. Devin rushes in the cage and pulls Carrie out before the lion can get her.

"I'll pass it" The judge said.

The judge gives them the thumbs up.

"Yes!" Carrie cheered.

"Carrie, there's something I have to tell you" Devin said.

"No time Devin!" Carrie said. "We gotta move!"

Cut to Devin talking to the camera with the stage in the background.

"Man, Carrie is so amazing" Devin said. "I wonder how I didn't see it before?"

Cut to the Ice Dancers and Best Friends running through the desert.

"The last two teams are on their way to the Chill Zone" Don said via voice over. "But I'll only get to call one of them a loser. Which team will it be?"

Both teams speed up in an attempt to make it to the Chill Zone first. Josee and Jacques out run the best friends and make it to the Chill Zone.

"Eighth!" Don announced.

 **Team Interview**

"I can't believe the Goths took first. Again!" Josee said. "I knew I should have used my stake"

"For the last time: They're not vampires" Jacques said. "At least we didn't finish last. And that magician let me keep that outfit"

Jacques holds up the purple sequin dress.

"What are you going to be doing with that?" Josee asked.

"None of your business" Jacques said.

 **End Interview**

Carrie and Devin are the last ones to arrive at the Chill Zone.

"Did we make it?" Carrie asked.

"Yes" Don said. "In last place. Which means that you should make your way to the airport. And try not to get distracted by all the casinos"

"Carrie I'm so sorry" Devin said. "It's totally my fault. But I realize something"

"What is it?" Carrie asked.

"I'm in love with you" Devin confessed.

"Wait, what? How long has this been?" Carrie asked.

"Well, um... I just realized it now but I've probably felt like this for a while" Devin said.

"I love you too" Carrie said. "And to think I almost gave up on you"

"I can't believe I didn't see this before but now I can say with out any doubt that I love you Carrie" Devin said.

"You have no idea how long I've wanted to hear that" Carrie said.

Carrie and Devin kiss.

"Aw... Isn't that sweet" Don said. "But I'd like you to get out of here now before I call security"

The two of them pull away.

"Right, let's go Carrie" Devin said.

"Sure thing" Carrie said.

"Ah, young love" Don said. "I think they're young. I really don't know"

Footage of Carrie and Devin play while they narrate over them.

"It was a super hard race, but you were my hero the whole time" Carrie said over a clip of Devin getting his foot stuck in geyser in Iceland.

"Not only did I have a great time but I got a new girlfriend" Devin said as a clip of him failing at the gymnastics challenge in Romania played.

"I had a blast" Carrie said while a clip of her eating the skewer of bugs in China played.

"I love you" Devin said as the footage switched to them walking toward the city.

"So, since we're in Vegas do you want to see the sights?" Carrie asked.

"You bet" Devin said. "Plus, if we run out of money we can always hitch hike back to Canada"

* * *

 **I hope you all liked this chapter. I also hope I handled Carrie and Devin getting together well. Let me know what you thought of that. As for the elimination, I thought the canon show dragged out the Best Friends' plot line for too long so I decided to eliminate them here. Please review the chapter. Feedback is always appreciated.**


	20. El Bunny Supremo

"Last time on the Ridonculous Race! Lady Luck took us to Vegas baby. The Goths made some magic happen and snatched first place. Devin finally realized he loved Carrie. But that was after he accidentally fed her to lions so that made things a bit awkward for them. And even more awkward when they were eliminated. Hey, at least they've got love. But love isn't million dollars so I think we'll stick with that. We have eight teams left and one will probably go home today. Find out who it is on: The Ridonculous Race!"

Don is leaning on the Don Box in Nevada.

"We're back in sunny Nevada" Don said. "Where the not so sunny Goths are preparing to receive their first tip"

Crimson and Ennui walk up to the Don Box and take a travel tip.

"Its time to go to Mexico... Oyle..." Crimson read.

Cut to a background of the Mexican flag with a picture of the beach to accompany it.

"I think you mean: Oyle!" Don said. "Yes, there's plenty to be excited about in Mexico. Where the sun is hot and so is the salsa. Both of which can cause blindness if exposed to for too long"

Cut to Don standing next to a bus.

"Teams must take a form of local transit known as a chicken bus all the way to Acapulco for their next challenge" Don explained.

Back at a Don Box Rock takes a travel tip.

"Cool, we're going to Mexico" Rock said.

"The old one or the new one?" Spud asked.

"Pretty sure there's just one" Rock said.

"Then why is there a New Mexico?" Spud asked.

"Huh, I don't know" Rock said.

The camera pans back to Josee and Jacques taking their travel tip.

Cut to the Ice Dancers talking to the camera.

"No more underestimating the competition" Josee said. "Those Gothic vampires got lucky in Vegas. But their luck is about to change"

"I hate them so much" Jacques said.

"You're interrupting" Josee said.

"Oh, so I'm just supposed to stand here and be the pretty one?" Jacques asked.

"Uh no, you support the pretty one" Josee said. "Me"

Cut to the bus moving down the road towards Mexico.

"All teams are now on the bus to Acapulco" Don narrted.

 **Team Interview**

"When we first heard we would be on a "Chicken Bus" we thought it was an expression or something" Kitty said.

"It wasn't" Emma said. "At all"

 **End Interview**

The teams are awkwardly sitting on the bus. They are all surrounded by chickens.

"Wow, look at all these chickens" Miles said.

"I wish we could release them all somehow" Laurie said.

"Well one of them already tried to fly out through a window" Miles said.

The camera pans over to Tom and Jen. Both of them look incredibly grossed out. Jen is sitting on Tom's lap.

"Why do you have to do this?" Tom asked.

"Because your lap is the cleanest surface in this entire bus" Jen said.

"Oh, thank you" Tom said. "I'm very flattered... I think"

The camera pans over to Rock and Spud.

"Hey Rock, I got some candy at the bus station" Spud said.

Spud takes some candy bars out of his pocket.

"Uh, those aren't real. Those are off brand versions of normal candies" Rock said.

"Wait, really?" Spud asked.

"Footsie Roll, Twax, Margarinefingers, Baby Bluth, Bradbury Dairy Milk, those don't sound real" Rock said.

"I'm eating them anyway" Spud said as he unwrapped his Baby Bluth.

The camera pans to Josee and Jacques glaring at the Goths from the other side of the bus.

"Maybe we could turn them against each other" Jacques suggested.

"Won't work" Josee said. "They're stuck together like glue"

"Maybe Goths don't have weaknesses" Jacques said.

"Everyone has a weakness" Josee said.

Josee sees Ennui petting Loki.

"And I think I just found it" Josee said.

Cut to much later where the bus is stopping in Acapulco.

"After an eighteen hour bus ride our teams are revved up" Don narrated.

The teams all get off the bus looking very tired.

"How is sitting in a bus and not doing anything so draining?" Junior asked.

"That's one of life's biggest mysteries sport" Dwayne said.

"So do you like stuff?" Jacques asked the Goths.

"No. Stuff is so mainstream" Ennui said.

"Oh, uh, of course it is" Jacques said awkwardly. "You sure are funny. Anyone ever tell you that?"

"No" Crimson and Ennui said at the same time.

"Oh, look at that, now I am falling over" Jacques said.

Jacques intentionally falls over on top of Ennui.

"Whoops, my bad" Jacques said. "You should be careful. You could trip someone with such big boots"

Cut to Josee and Jacques talking to the camera.

"Nothing up this sleeve" Jacques said, while pulling on his sleeve. "But look at this"

Jacques reaches behind Josee's head and pulls out Loki.

"Impressive, isn't it?" Jacques said.

Loki jumps on Jacques' face and starts clawing at it.

"Ah! Bad bunny! Get off of me!" Jacques yelled in terror.

"Wow, that is a terrifying bunny" Josee commented.

Cut to the teams arriving at the Don Box. Rock takes a travel tip, as does Tom.

"It's an All-In" Rock read.

"Who loves peppers and dip" Tom read.

Cut to Don standing next to three baskets of peppers. There are some green, orange, and red flags nearby.

"For these All-In a team member must eat a pepper from this food cart" Don explained. "Once done, wave the corresponding flag colour. Then the second team member must make like Acapulcan cliff diver"

The camera zooms out to reveal a giant cliff with three ledges.

"Eat the hottest pepper and your partner leaps from the lowest ledge" Don explained. "Eat a mid-range pepper and your partner jumps from the middle. And as you may have guessed eating the mildest pepper means that their partner will basically be jumping from the space station. Cliff divers will find their travel tips anchored to canteens at the bottom of the bay"

Cut to the teams reading the travel tips.

"The canteens are filled with just enough milk to cool off your partners burning mouth" Jen read.

"You jump and I eat" Tom said.

"Okay" Jen said. "At the very least can you eat the medium pepper?"

"Uh, I'll see what I can do" Tom said.

"Got it, I'll start climbing" Jen said.

The camera pans over to Sanders and MacArthur.

"How do you feel about eating a spicy pepper?" Sanders asked.

"You kidding? I could eat a bowl of fire with some lava on top" MacArthur bragged.

 **Team Interview**

"I'm all about spicy food" MacArthur said. "Back at the academy they called me the Volcano"

"You think they call you that because you eat spicy food?" Sanders asked.

"Why else would they call me that? What could possibly be the reason!?" MacArthur said angrily. "Oh... Because of my temper"

 **End Interview**

"Okay sport, I'll jump" Dwayne said.

"I don't know" Junior said. "I don't really like peppers"

"Junior, cliff diving is dangerous" Dwayne said. "And as your father I'm going to be jumping"

"You have a woman's tattoo" Junior said.

"Stop pointing that out" Dwayne said.

The camera pans to Rock holding up the small red pepper.

"Huh, for a tiny pepper it sure is intimidating" Rock said.

"You can do it Rock!" Spud cheered.

"Thanks for the support man!" Rock called up.

Rock pops the pepper into his mouth. His eyes light up and then he spits out the pepper.

"Ah! My mouth is on fire!" Rock exclaimed.

Rock shoves some sand into his mouth to try and cool it down.

"Thith jutht made it worthe..." Rock said though a mouthful of sand.

The camera pans to Tom and Miles looking at the green peppers.

"I'm glad I went for the medium pepper" Miles said.

"Me too" Tom said. "Don't want to end up looking like an idiot"

"I can hear you" Rock said.

"Whatever" Tom said.

Tom takes a green pepper and bites into it. His face immediately looks like it's in pain.

"Water! I need water" Tom exclaimed.

"Hey Laurie, is it cool if I do some warm ups before eating that pepper!?" Miles called up to her partner.

"Just don't take too long!" Laurie called back.

"What a bunch of wimps" MacArthur said.

MacArthur takes a small handful of the red peppers.

"Back at the academy I pepper sprayed all my meals" MacArthur said. "I've kind of built up an immunity to spice"

She shoves the handful of peppers into her mouth. She seems to handle them pretty well. MacArthur grabs the red flag and walks over to the bay.

"So eating the hottest pepper is easy" MacArthur said.

MacArthurs face suddenly turns red and her eyes go bloodshot.

"Sanders! I need milk! They took a while to take effect but they're terrible!" MacArthur yelled.

Sanders gives her partner the thumbs up and jumps into the water.

"Why would anyone eat these!" MacArthur yelled.

Junior walks over to the basket of green peppers.

"Dad! Is it okay if I eat the green ones?!" Junior called up to his father.

"Yes! Just be very careful! I don't want you to get hurt!" Dwayne called down.

Junior bites half of the green pepper.

"Ow! Why are these things so hot!" Junior exclaimed.

"You can eat the other half later sport!" Dwayne called down.

"Thank you!" Junior said.

 **Team Interview**

"Normally I don't like my dad treating me like this" Junior said. "But I know this time it's for my own safety"

"Thanks sport" Dwayne said.

 **End Interview**

Crimson, Jacques, and Kitty are deciding which pepper to eat.

"The hottest one can't be that bad" Kitty said.

MacArthur crawls over to them looking red in the face and out of breath.

"Kill me..." MacArthur said weakly.

They look over and see Rock putting more sand in his mouth.

"Don't eat the hottetht one" Rock said.

"Okay, medium it is" Kitty said.

 **Team Interview**

"The "Bravest decision" Isn't always the smartest decision" Emma said.

"Seriously. I love spicy food" Kitty said "But those peppers are hotter than the sun in the middle of July!"

 **End Interview**

Sanders walks over to her partner with out any milk.

"Where's the milk?" MacArthur asked.

"I couldn't find the milk" Sanders said. "But-"

"I don't care if you have to milk a mother manatee" MacArthur said. "Don't come back out of there with out milk!"

MacArthur picks up Sanders and throws her into the water.

The camera pans over to Miles and Rock looking at the green peppers.

"Okay, I'm gonna try this again" Rock said. "Maybe the medium one won't be so bad"

"And I'm gonna try for the first time" Miles said.

Miles looks at the pepper.

"You know what, you go first" Miles said.

"Sweet" Rock said.

Rock takes a bite of the pepper and he starts tearing up.

"Yeah, I think I'll just put this off some more" Miles said.

"Seriously!" Laurie shouted down.

"Why do all the spicy things grow in this part of the world!" Rock exclaimed.

"Hey man, want me to go up to the top level!" Spud called down.

"Yes..." Rock said weakly.

"Cool" Spud said.

Spud begins climbing.

The camera pans over to Kitty preparing to eat the medium pepper.

"Okay, how hard could this be" Kitty said.

Kitty eats the pepper. She makes kind of a weird face but keeps chewing.

"You're doing great Kitty" Emma said.

"Ah! It's so hot!" Kitty exclaimed. "It burns!"

Kitty quickly runs over and grabs the green flag.

"Jump Emma!" Kitty exclaimed.

Junior nervously looks at Kitty and then at the other half of his pepper.

"I can do this" Junior said. "It's just a little spice"

Junior eats the other half of the pepper.

"Ah! This is so hot!" Junior exclaimed.

Junior goes over to the flags and waves the green one.

"Dad, please jump!" Junior shouted.

"Got it sport, I'll be right there" Dwayne said.

 **Team Interview**

"It was real brave of Junior to eat that pepper" Dwayne said.

"I never want to eat any spicy food again" Junior said.

 **End Interview**

Jacques takes a green pepper out of the basket.

"I skate on the ice which is extremely cold. Some extreme hot shouldn't hurt me" Jacques said.

Jacques eats the peppers and his face turns red. His eyes also start watering.

"It's not... That bad..." Jacques said, trying to repress pain.

The camera pans over to Crimson grabbing a red pepper. She eats it and doesn't have a reaction to it.

"Ow..." Crimson said unemotionally.

Crimson takes the red flag and waves it.

Ennui sees this.

"Ready to jump Loki?" Ennui asked.

He looks down his shirt to see that Loki isn't in there.

"Loki?" Ennui said.

He quickly looks from left to right and sees that he isn't anywhere.

"No..." Ennui said, still in the same unemotional tone.

Back at the bottom of the cliff Sanders gets out of the water holding the canteen of milk. MacArthur grabs it and starts drinking it all.

"Finally!" MacArthur exclaimed.

"It's an All-In" Sanders read from her travel tip. "Burroed Alive?"

Cut to Don standing around a bunch of burros.

"For this challenge teams must take burros from this enclosure" Don said "And ride them two miles south to reach-"

Cut to Don at the Chill Zone near a temple.

"This temple, and the Chill Zone" Don said. "The last team to arrive may end up like the Mayans who once lived here... Not on reality TV"

Cut back to the Police Cadets leaving.

"Come on, let's get out of here" Sanders said.

"Go Cadets!" MacArthur cheered.

 **Confessional**

"We're the perfect team" MacArthur said. "I do all the hard stuff and she brings me refreshments"

"Wait, what?" Sanders said.

 **End Confessional**

At the top of the cliff Spud and Jen are talking while waiting for their partners to finish eating.

"Whoa, I think those off-brand candy bars weren't so good for me..." Spud said.

"I swear, if you throw up on me you are going to get it" Jen said.

"I think I'm good" Spud said "The inside of my mouth tastes like burnt rubber"

"Too much information" Jen said. "Ugh, I wonder what's taking Tom said long"

"Yeah, I hope Rock's okay" Spud said.

"Tom wasn't looking so good either" Jen said.

"So, you like video games?" Spud asked.

"No" Jen said.

Back on the ground Emma hands her sister the canteen of milk. Kitty drinks it as fast as she can.

"Let's go sis" Kitty said.

Emma and Kitty start running to where the burros are.

"We're so good when there are no boys to mess us up" Emma said. "Emma and Noah for the win!"

"Yeah, my name is Kitty" Kitty said.

"I knew that" Emma said.

The camera pans to Ennui getting out of the water and handing the milk to Crimson.

"Thanks" Crimson said, before noticing something is off with Ennui. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing" Ennui said unemotionally.

"But you're so emotional" Crimson said.

"Loki's gone" Ennui said.

 **Team Interview**

"Once Santa brought me a black kitten" Ennui said. "I named him Toxic Mold. One day he slipped out the door and he never came back"

"No bunny gets left behind" Crimson said.

 **End Interview**

Dwayne crawls out of the water and gives the canteen of milk to his son.

"Here you go sport" Dwayne said.

Junior drinks it.

"Thanks dad" Junior said. "Let's go find those donkeys"

"They're burros" Dwayne said.

"What's the difference?" Junior asked.

"I don't know" Dwayne said.

The camera pans over to Rock and Tom getting ready to eat the mild pepper.

"It's mild, it can't be that bad" Rock said.

"Yeah... Right" Tom said nervously.

The two of them eat their peppers.

"Hey, this isn't so bad" Rock said.

"You're right" Tom said.

Rock and Tom walk over to the flags. They each take an orange flag and wave it.

"I'm ready Jen!" Tom yelled.

"Me too!" Rock said.

The camera pans up to Spud and Jen.

"I feel like this is going to traumatize me for life" Jen said.

"Same here girl-man" Spud said. "But we need to jump"

"Fine, we both go on three" Jen said.

"Deal" Spud said.

"One... Two... Three..." Jen said. "Now!"

Spud and Jen jump off the cliff.

"Oh my God! This is how I'm gonna die!" Spud shouted.

"There's so much in life I haven't done yet!" Jen yelled.

The two of them look down and realize they still have a long way to fall.

"This may take a while" Spud said.

Back at the bottom of the cliff Jacques finishes eating the red pepper.

"All clear!" Jacques said.

Jacques runs over to the red flag and waves it. Josee jumps off the cliff and into the water.

"Bravo Josee, you are perfection!" Jacques said.

"Thank you" Josee said.

Josee notices a shadow looming over her.

"Um... What's this?" Josee asked.

Jen and Spud land on top of her.

"I'm still alive!" Spud exclaimed.

Meanwhile, Sanders and MacArthur are riding their burros down the road.

"Faster stallion! Faster!" MacArthur said.

"It's not a stallion it's a burro" Sanders said.

"I know that. But he doesn't" MacArthur said. "He could be cheetah fast. You just have to distil some confidence"

"It's instil. And it's not gonna make a difference" Sanders said.

"Onward stallion!" MacArthur exclaimed.

The burro suddenly starts running faster. Sanders just stares in bewilderment.

"It's just a coincidence" Sanders said.

The camera pans back to Emma and Kitty.

"Mexico is nice, but they could really use a few lemonade stands" Kitty said.

Suddenly, Jacques and Josee's burros run past Emma and Kitty.

"How did they do that?" Emma asked. "Let's hurry up Kitty!"

 **Team Interview**

"Skater legs are great for horseback riding" Josee said. "A strong consistent thigh squeeze tells them to go fast otherwise they might get hurt"

 **End Interview**

The Rockers and Fashion Bloggers walk over to their burros.

"You know, it was sure nice to get to know you" Spud said.

"Thanks" Jen said. "Too bad we're enemies again"

"Wait what?" Spud said.

Tom and Jen get on their burro and ride away.

"Damn it" Rock said.

Back at the basket of green peppers Miles is still procrastinating.

"Okay, I'll eat the pepper... In another three minutes" Miles said.

"Damn it Miles!" Laurie shouted down. "Eat the pepper!"

"Okay..." Miles said.

Miles eats the pepper.

"Hey, this isn't so bad" Miles said. "A little spicy, but not bad"

"Seriously!" Laurie shouted. "Whatever, I'll just jump"

Laurie jumps down.

Meanwhile, Crimson and Ennui are looking for Loki near the bus.

"Loki! Loki!" Ennui said in a slightly hushed tone.

"Don't start freaking out Ennui, we'll find them" Crimson said.

Meanwhile, MacArthur's burro has stopped at a bridge.

"Get up! It's just a bridge!" MacArthur yelled.

The burro just stares at her.

"Fine, have it your way" MacArthur said. "It's taser time"

MacArthur reaches into her pocket. Sanders runs over to her partner.

"You have a taser!" Sanders exclaimed. "How did you get that past airport security?! They took my pudding cup"

"Do you really want the answer?" MacArthur asked.

MacArthur looks over and sees that her burro has gone to sleep completely.

"Oh come on!" MacArthur exclaimed.

Josee and Jacques ride past them.

"Excuse us" Josee said. "See you at the finish... Or not!"

"Move it you beast!" MacArthur yelled at her burro.

Josee and Jacques make it to the other side of their bridge where they stop their burros.

"Hold up, the rabbit is tickling me" Jacques said.

Jacques reaches into his jacket and Loki jumps out. Loki growls at the burros. This causes the burros to buck Josee and Jacques off of them and run away. Loki chases after them.

Meanwhile, at the Chill Zone Don is pacing around.

"Where is everyone?" Don asked. "I sure hope those peppers don't lead to any court cases"

Sanders rides her Donkey over to the Carpet of Completion.

"Uh, you seem to be shy one loud aggressive partner" Don said.

Josee and Jacques run over to the Chill Zone.

"Wait, there's only one cop! We win!" Josee said.

"That's true, but unless one of you coughs up two burros I'll have to give you a ten minute penalty" Don said.

"No!" Josee and Jacques exclaimed.

"Yes!" Sanders cheered.

Back at the bridge, MacArthur is trying to get her burro to move.

"Move you stallion wannabe!" MacArthur yelled.

"Hurry MacArthur! You've got ten minutes to make it over here!" Sanders called over to her.

"Okay donkey... Wake up!" MacArthur yelled.

Meanwhile, Crimson and Ennui are sitting under a tree looking sadder than usual.

"I don't know how we'll ever find him" Crimson said.

"I'm not the one to say this, but: I think I'm going to miss them" Ennui said.

Crimson notices a weird shadow in the distance.

"What is that?" Crimson asked.

The shadow is revealed to be Loki riding a burro.

Crimson and Ennui walk over to Loki.

"I didn't know Loki could ride a burro" Ennui said.

"So... We keep going?" Crimson asked.

Back at the Chill Zone, the Ice Dancers are pacing around and waiting for their penalty to be up.

"Our ten minutes has to be up!" Josee said angrily.

"Actually, it isn't" Don said.

They look over and see MacArthur carrying her burro towards the Chill Zone.

"Come on big guy... Almost there" MacArthur said to the burro.

MacArthur makes it to the Chill Zone.

"Woo! First palce!" Sanders cheered.

"Take that ice freaks!" MacArthur said. "Victory is sweet"

 **Team Interview**

"The best part of winning means that the ice dancers lose" Sanders said.

"Hats off to that burro" MacArthur said. "He was one tough hombre... That means friend in Spanish right?"

"The word your looking for is amigo" Sanders said.

"Does hombre mean brother?" MacArthur asked.

"No, brother in Spanish is hermano" Sanders said.

"Well I'm stumped" MacArthur said.

 **End Interview**

"Ice Dancers, your time is up!" Don said. "Which means second for you!"

Josee and Jacques walk over to the Carpet of Completion. Emma and Kitty arrive at the Chill Zone after them.

"Emma and Kitty, third place!" Don said.

Dwayne and Junior ride over to the Chill Zone on their burros.

"Fourth!" Don announced.

Meanwhile, the Vegans and Goths are getting on their burros.

"I like donkeys" Crimson said. "For some reason they're so depressing"

"Oh, I like them too" Miles said. "But for a very different reason"

Back at the Chill Zone the Fashion Bloggers make it there next.

"Fifth!" Don announced.

"Yes!" Tom said. "And I managed to keep my dignity"

"I saw you crying when you ate that medium pepper" Jen said.

"Not the time Jen" Tom muttered.

Rock and Spud arrive at the Chill Zone after them.

"Sixth!" Don said.

"All right!" Spud cheered.

Meanwhile, the Goths are racing alongside the Vegans towards the Chill Zone.

"It all comes down to this" Don narrated. "Which team can beat the Mexican heat?"

Laurie and Miles pass the Goths on their burros.

"What a good little donkey" Miles said. "We'll give you a carrot when we get there"

The promise of carrots causes the donkey to speed up even more.

"I don't think we're gonna win" Ennui said.

Laurie and Miles arrive at the Chill Zone first.

"You are in seventh place!" Don announced.

"We did it!" Miles cheered.

Crimson and Ennui ride over to the Chill Zone on their burros.

"Crimson, Ennui, Rabbit" Don began. "I would like to inform you that... This is a non-elimination round!"

"What?" Ennui said.

"Aren't you happy?" Don asked.

"Whatever" Crimson said.

Don looks at the camera.

"All eight teams survive... For the most part" Don said. "But only one can win the million. Who will it be? I guess you'll just have to tune back in to see more of: The Ridonculous Race"

* * *

 **Well I sure had fun with this chapter. Sorry if this chapter was shorter than the others by the way. I really liked the location. Speaking of which I was able to have an entire chapter set in Mexico with out making any Donald Trump jokes... Unless that right there counts. As for making this a non-elimination round I did it for two reasons. One I like the Goths and more importantly the challenge in the next chapter requires an even number of teams. Be sure to review.**


	21. Ca-Noodling

"Last time on the Ridonculous Race! Things got spicy in Mexico. Jen got to know Spud a bit better but at the end of the day they were still enemies. The Ice Dancers were heading for gold but MacArthur got the better of them. It looked like Josee and Jacques succeeded in getting rid of the Goths by bunnynapping Loki. But it turned out to be a non-elimination round. I can't tell if the Goths were happy about it or not. Who will be going home this time? Find out right now on: The Ridonculous Race!"

"We're back in Mexico" Don said. "Where they part with both Mexico, and their dignities as they taunt the second place Ice Dancers"

"It sure is nice to be in first place" Sanders said.

"Yeah, you can almost feel the gold" MacArthur said.

"I want that gold!" Josee yelled.

 **Team Interview**

"From now on we stay in the winners circle by any means necessary" Sanders said.

"Does this mean I can use my taser?" MacArthur asked.

"No, you can not taser anyone" Sanders said.

"Aw... Come on" MacArthur said.

 **Second Interview**

"Second place... Again!" Josee said angrily.

"The worst part is our attempt to get rid of the Goths was pointless" Jacques said.

 **EndInterview**

Sanders takes a travel tip from the Don Box.

"Travel to Can Tho Vietnam" Sanders read.

Cut to the Vietnamese flag with a postcard from Can Tho to accompany it.

"Can Tho is not only a good name for a movie villain. It's also the largest city in Vietnam's thriving Mekong Delta" Don narrated.

Cut to Don at a Don Box near the Mekong river.

"Teams will find their next travel tip here" Don said. "Along the Mekong river. Where the fish are plentiful and pungent"

Meanwhile, back at the Don Box, teams are getting their travel tips.

"It says we're going to Vietnam" Dwayne read.

"Didn't grandpa live there for a while?" Junior asked.

"Well actually he didn't live there. There was a war at the time and- You know what, I think I'll explain it to you when you're older" Dwayne said.

"Um... Okay" Junior said.

Meanwhile, the Fashion Bloggers are calling a cab.

"Taxi!" Tom yelled.

A cab pulls up.

"Thanks" Jen said.

Rock and Spud run over to their taxi.

"Wait!" Spud exclaimed.

"Hey, can we get in with you?" Rock asked. "We kind of don't have a cab"

"Um... Okay just don't touch my clothes" Jen said.

"Deal" Rock said.

The Rockers and Fashion Bloggers get in the cab.

Meanwhile, back at the Don Box Laurie and Miles get their travel tip.

"Okay, I have a feeling today is going to be better" Miles said. "No more procrastinating like last time"

"Good" Laurie said. "What does the travel tip say?"

"We're going to Vietnam" Miles said.

"Ooh, I've always wanted to go there" Laurie said.

Meanwhile at the airport the Rocker and Fashion Bloggers arrive first. They run up to the guy at the tickets desk.

"Two tickets to Can Tho please" Tom said.

"Uh... Tom" Jen said.

The Fashion Bloggers and Rockers look behind them to see all the other teams running towards them. Both teams get trampled by the others.

Cut to a plane up in the air.

"All eight teams are aboard the same flight to Vietnam" Don narrated. "When they land it'll be race to find taxi's"

Cut to the plane landing at the airport in Can Tho and all the teams getting off the plane.

"Hurry! We need to move!" Josee said.

"I know Josee" Jacques said.

All the teams make it outside the airport and get in Taxis except for the Sisters and Vegans.

"Damn it! No more cabs!" Emma exclaimed.

"I think I see something" Kitty said.

Kitty points to two kids on bikes with a carriage in front of their bike.

"Ooh, that looks fun" Laurie said.

Both teams run over to the bikes.

"Hi, can you take us to the Mekong River?" Miles asked.

The kid nods.

The camera pans to Emma and Kitty running up to the other kid on the bicycle.

"Well, when in Vietnam" Kitty said.

"No way this kid is fast enough" Emma said glaring at the kid on the bike. "Kitty, you pedal the bike"

 **Team Interview**

"Now that my mind is fully off, Noah" Emma said while dreamily emphasizing the last part of the sentence. "Or whatever is name was! I am totally focused on the race!"

"I haven't decided whether this is a good thing or a bad thing" Kitty said.

 **End Interview**

Meanwhile, at the Mekong River, the Police Cadets and Ice Dancers are racing towards the Don Box. Josee and Jacques are ahead.

"See you at the finish line!" Josee taunted.

MacArthur tackles Josee and Jacques.

"Nice try Ice Nerds!" McArthur said.

Sanders takes a travel tip from the Don Box.

"It's a Super Team challenge" Sanders read. "Three teams must go catfish noodling together"

"Super noodle what now?" MacArthur asked.

Cut to Don on a boat.

"Catfish noodling is a fishing technique where your fingers are used as bait for enormously disgusting fish" Don explained.

The scene shifts to Don standing by some boats at the dock.

"In this Super Team challenge four teams must work together in a group and collectively noodle six catfish to receive their next tip" Don explained. "As an added bonus if a Super Team catch a the special branded Ridonculous Race catfish they get a Zip It Ticket"

Don takes a green ticket with an arrow on it out from behind his back.

"They get to skip the next challenge and go straight to the Chill Zone" Don explained. "And as always: The last team to meet me there may be out of the race"

Back at the Don Box the Cadets and Ice Dancers are looking at each other.

"Looks like we'll be working... Together!" Josee said.

MacArthur gasps.

 **Team Interview**

"I can't stand fish!" Jacques said. "They're so slimy and wiggly!"

"Too bad!" Josee said. "We need that Zip-It Ticket to guarantee another gold. And I will do anything to get it. Even if it means..."

 **Second Interview**

"... Helping our sworn enemies!" MacArthur exclaimd angrily. "No! No, no, no, no, no, no!"

"We don't really have a choice" Sanders pointed out.

"In that case..." MacArthur said as she reached into her pocket.

"No tasers!" Sanders said.

"Aw... Come on!" MacArthur said.

"Look, what was it you told me once?" Sanders asked. "Sometimes you gotta dislocate your own shoulder to get through a fence so you can slap a chihuahua with a citation for excessive noise"

"I make a good point" MacArthur said. "Darn me!"

 **End Interview**

"So I guess it's you, us, and the next two teams that show up" MacArthur said.

"Come on, let's get a boat" Sanders said.

The Police Cadets and Ice Dancers leave to the docks. A Taxi parks near the Don Box and the Rockers get out.

"Cool, we made it!" Rock said.

Spud takes a ticket.

"Awesome, we get to work with other teams" Spud said. "Wonder who they'll be?"

Another cab pulls up and the Fashion Bloggers get out.

"Dang it!" Rock exclaimed.

"What?" Tom asked.

"Just read your ticket" Rock said.

Jen goes over to the Don Box and takes a ticket.

"Seriously? We have to work with you?" Jen said.

"I would rather get motor oil on my shirt than work with you" Tom said.

"Uh, well same to you" Rock said.

"Who are the other teams we have to work with?" Tom asked.

"Let's check" Rock said

The Rockers and Fashion Bloggers run up to docks and See the Police Cadets and Ice Dancers in their boat.

"Hey, we're like supposed to be a team or whatever" Spud said.

"Seriously, this is the best help we get?" Josee asked. "Okay, get on the boat"

The Fashion Bloggers and Rockers get in the boat.

"Let's go" MacArthur said.

Back at the Don Box Emma and Kitty make it there on the bike. Kitty looks very tired from all the peddling she did.

"Okay... That took longer than I thought" Emma said. "But you did great and we beat the Vegans, Father & Son, and Goths so..."

"Did you say something" A nearby voice said.

Emma looks over to see Crimson and Ennui by the boats.

"Well we still beat Laurie and Miles" Emma said.

"They're here too" Crimson said.

Emma sees Laurie and Miles next to the Goths.

"Hi" Miles said.

"Let me guess, Dwayne and Junior are here too" Emma said.

"Yep" Laurie said.

Dwayne and Junior walk over the Emma and Kitty.

"We're going to be in a Super Team" Dwayne said. "Isn't that fun"

"Is that a woman's tattoo?" Emma asked Dwayne.

"I don't know what you're referring to" Dwayne said.

"It is" Junior answered.

"Junior, please keep quiet" Dwayne whispered to his son.

"I am not liking you people so far" Emma said.

The four teams walk over to their boat and get in.

Meanwhile, with the first Super Team all the team members are in the water looking for fish except for Tom and Jacques.

"Get in the water Jacques!" Josee yelled.

"You too Tom!" Jen said.

Tom takes off his glasses.

"Okay, I'm ready" Tom said.

Tom gets in the water.

"Jacques!" Josee yelled. "Stop stalling"

Jacques puts on some sparkly white gloves.

"Take off those gloves! You look ridiculous with them!" Josee said.

"Never!" Jacques exclaimed.

Cut to Jacques talking to the camera over by the docks.

"I will stick my bare hand into a glove full of bullet ants. But not in a fishes mouth!" Jacques said. "They're too cold and slimy. It's like giving my grandma a foot rub... Don't give me that look!"

Meanwhile, the other Super Team is looking for a spot to fish.

"You know I'm not really okay with fishing" Laurie said.

"Yeah, at least in Iceland and Alberta the animals we were harming were already dead" Miles said. "There has to be a way to complete this challenge without hurting anything"

"Pacifism is an impossible path to take in life" Crimson said.

"You either die good or survive and be evil" Ennui said.

"We're never talking to you two again" Miles said.

"We don't care" Crimson said.

"Um... Okay" Laurie said.

Laurie and Miles sit down next to Dwayne and Junior.

"Yeah, those two vampire-like teens were bothering us too" Dwayne said. "They sure are... Interesting"

"That's one way of saying it" Laurie said.

"Hey, is that a woman's tattoo?" Miles asked.

"He doesn't like talking about it" Junior said. "He got it by mistake"

"It's not a tattoo my beard grows in this pattern" Dwayne said.

"Yeah, he's lying" Junior said.

Meanwhile, back with the other Super Team, a catfish grabs on to Sanders' hand.

"Yes!" Sanders exclaimed.

MacArthur swims past her.

"Get over her you stupid moustache fish!" MacArthur exclaimed.

Sanders tries to shake her hand in order to get the fish off but it doesn't.

"Hey, MacArthur can you help me get this thing off?" Sanders asked.

MacArthur ignores her and continues chasing the fish.

"Get on my arm!" MacArthur exclaimed. "That's an order!"

Sanders shakes her arm and the catfish falls off but it swims away.

"No!" Sanders exclaimed. "Hey, MacArthur, could you try not yelling for a change. Your voice is scaring the fish"

"And don't forget her face, personality, and odour. All very scary" Josee said.

Cut to Sanders and MacArthur talking to the camera. MacArthur is sitting up one a rock and Sanders is in the water.

"They thing they're so funny" MacArthur said. "But the joke's gonna be on them when we crush their golden dreams forever!"

"After this challenge" Sanders added. "Super Team. Remember"

"Right..." MacArthur said.

Meanwhile, with the Rockers and Fashion Bloggers they are fishing near each other.

"Are there any fish nearby?" Tom asked. "Everything's all blurry without my glasses"

"No" Jen said. "Also, I think you look better with out glasses"

"Yeah, you totally do" Rock said.

"Oh, uh, thank you" Tom said. "I should by some contact lenses when I get home"

"Hey, Spud, anything biting?" Rock asked.

"No" Spud said.

Spud raises his hand out of the water to reveal a catfish. He notices it.

"Ah! How did that get there!" Spud exclaimed.

Spud waves his hand around wildly and the catfish falls off and swims away.

"You idiot! We had a fish!" Jen exclaimed.

"Sorry" Spud said.

Back on the other Super Team, they have now stopped their boat in the middle of the river.

"Okay Super Team, there are probably some fish right under us" Emma said. "So, Kitty and Junior jump off the left side of the boat to scare the fish towards Crimson and I on the other side"

"This is gonna be fun" Kitty said.

Kitty and Junior jump off the boat this scares a few fish towards Crimson and Emma.

"Get over here fish... Or whatever" Crimson said.

Emma feels something on her hand. She quickly pulls it out of the water to reveal a giant catfish.

"Ew! Ew! I got one!" Emma said.

Crimson feels something bite her hand. She takes her hand out of the river and sees a giant fish on her hand.

"Ew... I guess, or whatever" Crimson said.

The two of them swim over to the boat. Laurie and Miles grab the fish.

"Why is this thing so big and slimy?" Miles asked.

"I don't know" Laurie said.

They hand their fish off to Dwayne.

"Here, put these in a pile" Laurie said.

The fish wriggle around and one slaps Dwayne with its tail.

 **Team Interview**

"Is it me or are these challenges getting more dangerous?" Dwayne asked.

"They're definitely getting more dangerous" Junior said.

 **End Interview**

Jacques is slowly reaching into the water with his gloved hand. A fish jumps out of the water and Jacques cowers in fear.

The camera pans over to Rock and Spud.

"Okay, now that we're away from those fashion people we should be good" Rock said. "Catch anything Spud?"

"Let me check" Spud said.

Spud raises his hand out of the water to reveal another giant catfish.

"Spud, does your hand feel weird at all?" Rock asked.

"No, why do you ask?" Spud asked.

"Because there's a- You know what forget it. It'd take hours to explain" Rock said. "Just give me that fish"

Rock grabs the catfish off of Spud's hand but it wriggles around and falls back into the water.

The camera pans to Sanders getting a fish off her hand and holding it down.

"Yes! That's two!" Sanders exclaimed. "MacArthur! Team!"

The camera pans over to MacArthur talking to Josee.

"You know what you need, skater girl?" MacArthur said.

"I'm sure this will be some useful insight" Josee said sarcastically. "Do tell"

"A fish slap!" MacArthur exclaimed.

MacArthur takes the fish from her partner and throws it at Josee.

"Hey! You let my fish go!" Sanders exclaimed.

"Worth it. Am I right?" MacArthur said.

"No! You're not right" Sanders said.

"Whatever" MacArthur said.

Josee tackles MacArthur and they both start fighting underwater.

"Ugh! Listen up team!" Sanders said. "In case you hadn't noticed: We're losing!"

The camera pans over to Emma handing a catfish to Laurie.

"Nice! Only two more to go guys" Emma said.

"I still feel kind of bad about this" Laurie said.

"The ends justify the means" Miles said.

The camera pans back to the other Super Team.

"Se what they're doing?!" Sanders asked angrily.

"They are... Co-cooperating..." Josee said. "Ugh! I was not born with that gene!"

"Obviously we all hate each other" Sanders said.

"Of course" Josee said.

"I hate her more" MacArthur said.

"Yeah, I'm not the biggest fan of you all" Jen said.

"Same" Rock said.

"But right now, can we hate them more?" Sanders asked. "Because, you know, they're kind of beating us"

"That is pretty annoying" MacArthur said.

"Fine, we'll have a temporary truce" Josee said.

Josee and MacArthur shake hands.

"I guess that goes for us too" Tom said to Rock.

"Sure, but only until after this challenge. Cool?" Rock said.

Tom and Rock shake hands.

"Okay, so what's the plan?" MacArthur asked.

"I have an idea" Josee said.

Josee points to a sleeping crocodile.

"Sabotage anyone" Josee said sinisterly.

Josee and MacArthur start laughing evilly as they walk away.

"I've made a huge mistake" Sanders said.

The camera pans over the boat of the other Super Team. Josee and MacArthur pass the boat.

"Did you see that super big catfish over by the rocks!" Josee said loudly.

"Yeah, it would sure take a real strong guy to get it!" MacArthur said.

Dwayne overhears this.

"Hmm... I wonder" Dwayne said.

Cut to Dwayne on the boat talking to the camera.

"I think everyone around here sees me as dead weight" Dwayne said. "But I bet if I catch that catfish I'll be able to get their respect"

Cut to Dwayne over by the rocks.

"Okay, they said over by the rocks" Dwayne said. "So here goes nothing"

Dwayne reaches into the water and grabs the tail of the crocodile.

"Uh oh, this isn't a fish..." Dwayne said nervously.

The crocodile rises from the water and glares and Dwayne.

"Yeah... I'm dead" Dwayne said.

Dwayne starts swimming away from the crocodile. The crocodile chases after him.

Cut to Emma handing a catfish to Laurie.

"And that's the last fish" Emma said.

"I'll find the judge" Ennui said.

Ennui swims away.

"You know this Super Team alliance worked out pretty well" Kitty said. "Should we make it permanent?"

"Sure" Miles said.

"I'm in" Junior said.

"Whatever" Crimson said.

"Everyone run!" Dwayne exclaimed. "I'm being chased by a crocodile!"

"Are you kidding me!?" Emma exclaimed. "A crocodile?!"

"To be honest, I didn't even know they had crocs in Vietnam" Kitty said.

Dwayne climbs into the boat. The crocodile follows him into the boat.

"Please don't kill me!" Dwayne exclaimed.

The crocodile sees the fish in the boat and eats the fish. The now satisfied crocodile lies down.

"Phew, that was close" Dwayne said.

"Those were are fish!" Emma exclaimed. "Now what are we going to do?!"

Ennui leads a boat with a Vietnamese man in it over to his teams boat.

"I guess we won the challenge or whatever" Ennui said to the man. "Anyway, take a look"

"Yeah, about that. They got eaten by a crocodile" Miles said.

"Sorry" Dwayne said.

"Well, we had six catfish" Emma said. "Maybe you could just take our word for it?"

The judge shakes his head.

"Are you kidding me! We have to start over?!" Emma exclaimed.

"Wait! It isn't over!" Miles said.

"What are you talking about?" Laurie said.

"I'm going to do something I promised myself I wouldn't do" Miles said.

Miles grabs the crocodile and tries to give it the Heimlich

"Pacifism is an impossible path to take in life" Crimson said.

"You either die good or survive and be evil" Ennui said.

"We're never talking to you two again" Miles said.

 **Team Interview**

"Wow, I didn't think you had it in you to actually hurt an animal" Laurie said.

"If we get that prize money we'll be able to help so many animals" Miles said. "So what if a few get hurt"

"You gonna be okay?" Laurie asked.

"Yeah... Sure" Miles said.

 **End Interviewe**

The crocodile coughs up the catfish it ate.

"I did it!" Miles exclaimed.

The judge hands Miles a travel tip.

"It's an All-In. Get lost and found underground" Miles read.

Cut to Don somewhere underground.

"Teams will take a taxi to these wartime tunnels" Don said. "Somewhere down here they'll find a Don Box with directions to the Chill Zone. But they'd better be careful because these tunnels are filled with traps, dead ends, and more than a few spiders"

The Sisters, Father & Son, Vegans, and Goths go to the shore on their boat. The other Super Team sees this.

"What?!" Tom exclaimed.

"Dang it!" MacArthur said angrily.

"Bummer" Spud said.

"I cooperated for nothing!" Josee exclaimed.

"Not sure that sabotage counts as cooperation" Sanders said.

"Guys come over here!" Jacques yelled.

Everyone goes over to where Jacques is. He is pointing at the branded catfish which is jumping out of the water.

"Quick! Somebody catch it!" Jacques exclaimed.

The branded catfish bites Jacques' hand.

"Ah! Get it off! Somebody help!" Jacques exclaimed.

Jacques bashes the fish against the side of the boat in an attempt to get it off of him. The fish comes off and it flies into the air. It then lands in the boat.

"Hello Zip It Ticket!" Jen exclaimed.

"Sweet!" Rock exclaimed.

 **Team Interview**

"Okay, that temporary truce was a good idea" Jen said.

"That's nice" Tom said.

"But now it's over" Jen said.

"I'm okay with that" Tom said.

 **End Interview**

At the tunnels the Goths, Father & Son, Sisters, and Vegans arrive in taxis.

"While the first Super Team is on their way to the Chill Zone the others still have to make it though the tunnels" Don narrated.

They all look into the tunnels.

"Looks kind of creepy" Miles said.

"Let's go Junior" Dwayne said.

The teams enter the tunnels. They walk straight ahead before coming to four separate paths they could take.

"Well, good luck" Kitty said.

"Wait, aren't we still one big team or something?" Laurie asked.

"I don't think so" Junior said.

"Absolutely not" Crimson said.

"No thanks" Emma said.

"Okay" Laurie said.

Each team takes a different tunnel path.

Meanwhile at the Chill Zone, the Ice Dancers, Police Cadets, Rockers, and Fashion Bloggers arrive at the Chill Zone.

"It looks like our first Super Team is in a three way tie for first" Don said. "Congratulations"

"I know this sounds crazy, but maybe we should keep this alliance up" Sanders said.

"Hmm... I thinking about it" Josee said. "Okay fine"

"Why not" Jen said.

"Wait" Tom said. "You just said that-"

"Shush Tom" Jen said.

"Yeah, I guess we're in too" Rock said.

 **Team Interview**

"I don't get it? Why are we agreeing with them?" Tom asked.

"Everyone else in this alliance either an idiot, completely nuts, or both" Jen said. "But I'd rather be with them than against them"

 **Second Interview**

"Of course this isn't a real alliance" Jacques said. "We are just messing with the cadets"

 **Third Interview**

"You know, let them think they're safe" Sanders said. "And when their guards down..."

"Boom! We drop the stun gun and send them back to high school!" MacArthur exclaimed.

 **Fourth Interview**

"I think this alliance thing is gonna be super cool" Rock said.

"Hey, do you think the others aren't telling us something?" Spud asked.

There's a short pause.

"Nah, that can't be" Rock said.

 **End Interview**

Meanwhile, in the caves Laurie and Miles are looking around.

"I think I see something up ahead" Laurie said.

"Let's check it out" Miles said.

They approach a spot in the cave blocked by a spiders web.

"Great, now we have to go around this" Laurie said.

"We could always just move the web" Miles pointed out.

"Yeah, but I don't really want to destroy this spiders home" Laurie said.

The spider climbs on to its web and hisses at the Vegans.

"You know what! Let's just find another way out!" Miles exclaimed.

Meanwhile, Emma and Kitty are looking around.

"This place is creepy" Emma said.

Emma sees a human skull on the ground.

"Huh, I wonder how long this thing has been here" Emma said.

Kitty taps on her sisters shoulder.

"Gah! Don't do that!" Emma exclaimed.

"Oh... Sorry" Kitty said.

Meanwhile Dwayne and Junior are approaching a light at the end of the tunnel.

"Come on! I think we're almost there!" Dwayne said.

"Cool" Juinior said.

Dwayne and Junior make it out of the tunnel only to realize they're back at the start.

"Are you kidding me!" Junior exclaimed.

Dwayne facepalms.

"Let's go back" Dwayne said.

Meanwhile Crimson and Ennui are in the tunnels.

"I like this place" Ennui said.

"It smells of death" Crimson said.

The two of them see a pair of red eyes in the darkness up ahead.

"Should we be worried?" Crimson asked.

"Meh, it's probably just a spider" Ennui said.

Meanwhile, Laurie and Miles are still running.

"There has to be an exit somewhere" Miles said.

Laurie and Miles crash into a dead end wall.

"Gah! Why is it so dark in here" Laurie exclaimed.

"These tunnels are so confusing" Miles said. "Come on, let's try and find a way out"

Meanwhile, Emma and Kitty are still looking for a way out.

"These tunnels are getting more and more maze like" Kitty said. "Who dug these?"

"I don't know but I want out" Emma said.

"Hey, do you think they have any traps down here?" Kitty asked.

"Kitty, if they had any traps I'd have found one by now" Emma said.

Emma steps on one section of the ground that collapses to reveal a bunch of spikes at the bottom of a pit. Emma grabs the edge of the rocks in order to stay up.

"Help me up!" Emma yelled.

Meanwhile, Crimson and Ennui are walking around in the dark.

"I like the dark" Crimson said. "Something about it is so comforting"

"I should probably light a match. We don't want to get too lost" Ennui said.

Ennui lights a match to reveal that there are spiders crawling all over him.

"Do you realize that there are spiders on you?" Crimson asked.

"Yes" Ennui said. "And I don't care"

Crimson and Ennui exit the dark stretch of the cave and see the Don Box.

"Cool" Crimson said.

Suddenly a loud scream is heard echoing through the cave.

"Should we check that out?" Ennui asked.

"Probably" Crimson said. "I don't really care"

Back with the Sisters, Emma is still dangling over the pit and Kitty is trying to pull her up.

"You're slipping!" Kitty exclaimed.

Emma looks down at the spikes.

"I don't remember my contract saying anything about this!" Emma exclaimed.

Suddenly another hand grabs Emma and pulls her out. She looks up and sees Crimson and Ennui.

"What the- What are you doing here?" Emma asked.

"We heard screaming and we were intrigued" Crimson said.

"Anyway, we found the Don Box" Ennui said.

"Cool, can you take us there?" Kitty asked.

"Well I have a feeling you're going to follow us anyway if we say no" Crimson said. "So why not"

"This doesn't mean we're... Friends" Ennui said.

Ennui shudders.

Cut to the four teams at the underground Don Box. Each team takes a travel tip.

"Yes! A map!" Emma exclaimed. "Come on Kitty!"

Emma grabs her sisters hand and they start running.

"Let's go or whatever" Ennui said.

"Sure" Crimson said.

Crimson and Ennui start running towards the exit.

"Let's go sport" Dwayne said.

"You got it dad" Junior said.

Dwayne and Junior run after the other teams.

"Are you going to be okay?" Miles asked. "You ran into that wall pretty hard"

"It's going to be fine" Laurie said. "We may have had a rough day but this will be worth it"

Laurie and Miles run towards the exit.

Cut to the outside of the cave. All of the teams are racing towards the Chill Zone.

"It's a footrace to the Chill Zone!" Don said via voice over. "I can't wait to see who it's gonna be"

Crimson and Ennui arrive at the Chill Zone.

"Fifth!" Don announced.

Emma and Kitty arrive next.

"Sixth!" Don said. "Only two teams left. Who's it gonna be? The Father & Son or the Vegans?"

Dwayne and Junior run up to Don.

"And seventh!" Don announced.

Laurie and Miles make it to the Chill Zone last.

"Laurie, Miles, you are in eighth place" Don said. "Which means you're eliminated"

"Damn it!" Laurie exclaimed.

"Some second chance this turned out to be" Miles said.

Footage of Laurie and Miles competing plays while they narrate over it.

"Ugh, I can believe we came back just to get eliminated again" Laurie said over a clip of her getting her hand bitten by the baby seal in Finland played.

"Hey, at least we made it further than those magicians" Miles said as a clip of them and the Magicians getting kicked by the kangaroo in Australia was shown.

"I suppose that is something. And I guess we did have fun" Laurie said as a clip of Miles trying to eat the pork and beans in Alberta played.

"Yeah, you're right, I did have fun" Miles said as the footage changed to them walking away.

"But how are we going to raise awareness for animals?" Laurie said.

"Eh, I'm sure we'll think of something... I wonder if there are any protests coming up" Miles said

* * *

 **I hope this didn't take to long to get out. I had trouble writing this chapter. I honestly don't even now why. Not too much was changed up other than the people involved in the Super Team. As for the elimination, I didn't have much else to do with Laurie and Miles. I liked them but it was their time to go. Let me now your thoughts on the chapter.**


	22. How Deep Is Your Love

"Last time on the Ridonculous Race! There are plenty of fish in the sea but not as many as the ones we saw last time in Vietnam. Dwayne got the attention of an alligator that gave his team a real disadvantage. But it actually ended up working out for them in the most grotesque way possible. A four way alliance tied the first Super Team for first place. While the others headed underground. In the end it was the Vegans that went home. Looks like their second chance ended up in last. This week I get to kick off another team I don't like. Stick around to find out who on: The Ridonculous Race"

Don is standing near the Don Box in Vietnam.

"Welcome back to Vietnam" Don said. "Only seven teams remain and the teams from yesterdays Super Team alliance have the advantage in numbers and in order of departure"

 **Team Interview**

"This alliance is not a friendship" Sanders said.

"You got that right" MacArthur said. "It's just an agreement to work with people we hate"

 **Second Interview**

"If we get a chance to eliminate the Sisters, Father & Son, or those stupid Goths we take it" Jacques said.

"And, if we get a chance to eliminate the Cadets, Fashion Bloggers, or Rockers we also take it" Josee said. "We just make it look like an accident"

 **Third Interview**

"I really don't think we can trust anyone around here" Jen said. "Especially those ice skaters"

"Yeah... They seem a little bit... What's the word I'm looking for?" Tom said..

"Crazy?" Jen suggested.

"Yeah, they're crazy" Tom said.

 **Fourth Interview**

"I like everyone here" Spud said.

"Me too" Rock said. "I'm glad we get to be friends with such trustworthy people... I have a bad feeling about this"

"I'm sure it'll be fine" Spud said.

 **End Interview**

Sanders takes a travel tip from the Don Box.

"Catch a flight to Siberia" Sanders read.

Cut to a picture of the Russian flag with a postcard of the Siberian landscape to accompany it.

"This massive province of Russian is home to the Siberian tiger, the Siberian husky, and probably some other animal prefaced with the order Siberian" Don narrated.

Cut to Don near a Don Box at a airport.

"Teams will fly to this Russian airport to retrieve their next tip" Don explained.

Cut to the Police Cadets' taxi.

"I say we go after the Sisters" MacArthur said. "It's survival of the fittest out here"

"Or since their not expecting it we could go after the Ice Dancers" Sanders suggested. "Just grab them by their little-"

"Shh!" MacArthur shushed. "I know. But first the weaklings, then the big dogs, then we collect the winnings"

The camera pans back to Emma and Kitty's cab.

"Okay, the Ice Dancers are going to be coming after either us, or Dwayne and Junior. Or even possibly those fashion people" Emma said. "We need to make sure it's one of them"

"I don't really want to do that" Kitty said.

"I guarantee you that Dwayne and Junior are plotting against us right now" Emma said.

The camera pans back to their taxi.

"Sorry about that thing with the alligator in the last challenge" Dwayne said.

"It's fine" Junior said.

"It really seems like these challenges are getting harder" Dwayne said.

"And more likely to kill you" Junior added.

"I don't remember that in our contract" Dwayne said.

Cut to the Ice Dancers, Police Cadets, Rockers, and Fashion Bloggers arriving at the airport. They all start running towards an air plane.

"Let's hurry!" Sanders exclaimed. "The next plane won't be here for another eight hours"

Tom and Jen push Rock and Spud out of the way.

"Hey!" Rock exclaimed.

"Jut because we're in a sort-of-alliance doesn't mean we have to be friends" Jen said.

"That's a relief" Spud said.

The four teams make it inside the plane and take their seats.

"We'll be in first place for sure" Josee said.

"Welcome... Uh... Aboard everyone" The pilot said very slowly over the speakers. "We're um... Going to be closing the... Uh... Cabin doors... Any... Uh, second now for the taking off"

"Just close the doors already!" Josee yelled.

The doors close.

"Ha! Now the others are going to be way behind" Josee said.

Emma and Kitty walk past them. Followed by the Goths and Father & Son.

"Hi" Crimson said.

"Damn it!" Josee yelled.

Cut to later where the plane is halfway to Russia.

"The plane has departed with all teams aboard" Don narrated. "Some happier than others"

"Now we're all on the same flight!" Josee said angrily. "And it's all that pilots fault!"

"Why. Because he, uh, takled like uh, this" Jacuqes joked.

Josee punches him in the jaw.

The camera pans back to Dwayne and Junior.

"Okay sport, we need a strategy if we want to win" Dwayne said.

"Uh, since when do you care about winning?" Junior asked. "I thought we were doing this for fun?"

"We were" Dwayne said. "But that was before I got a tattoo"

"True" Junior said.

Cut to later where the plane is landing in Russia.

"Let's go!" Emma exclaimed.

The teams get out of the plane and start running towards the Don Box outside the airport. The Goths make it to the Don Box first. Crimson takes a travel tip.

"Hmm... It says we have to ice yacht in our swimsuits to the Kola Borehole" Crimson read.

"I like ice" Ennui said. "It's as cold as my heart"

Cut to Don standing by some ice yachts.

"Each team must take one of these ice yachts and sail them due north while wearing swimsuits" Don said.

Cut to don riding an ice yacht across the ice.

"That's how the Russians used to do winter sports to show how tough they are" Don said.

Don crashes his yacht into a rock.

"My face!" Don exclaimed.

Cut to a beat up looking Don by the Kola Borehole.

"They will take their yachts to the Kola Borehole" Don said. "Where there are oddly no soft drinks for sale. This is where the racers will get their regular clothes back... I really want a cream soda. Do we have any?"

"We have a Dr. Pepper" A man off screen said.

"Seriously? That's like, everyone's third choice" Don said.

Cut to the teams back at the airport getting in their taxis.

"Taxi!" Jen exclaimed.

A taxi parks in front of them.

Rock and Spud run over to the Fashion Bloggers.

"Hey, can we ride with you?" Spud asked.

"Again!? Seriously?!" Tom exclaimed.

"Alliance, remember..." Jen said.

"Fine, come on in or whatever" Tom said.

"Thanks man" Rock said.

The Rockers and Fashion Bloggers get in their car.

The camera pans up the road to the other taxis racing.

"Faster driver!" Josee yelled at the cab driver.

"Josee I don't think he speaks English" Jacques said.

"Shut up Jacques!" Josee yelled.

All the taxis park and the teams get out.

"Now what do we do?" Kitty asked.

"Come on, I think I see the changing room" Emma said.

The teams enter the changing rooms. Don walks in front of the camera.

"How long do you think they're going to be in their?" Don asked.

"Beats me Don" The cameraman said.

"We are not on a first name basis" Don said.

"Sorry sir" The cameraman said.

"Hey, we're going to edit this out, right?" Don said.

"Probably" The cameraman said.

Dwayne and Junior exit the changing room and run over the the yachts.

"You ready to go Junior?" Dwayne said.

"You bet" Junior said.

The camera pans over to the changing rooms. Sanders is wearing her swimsuit and waiting for MacArthur to finish changing.

"Hurry up MacArthur! I'm freezing!" Sanders exclaimed.

MacArthur steps out of the changing room wearing a polka dotted swim suit.

"Can't be cold when you look this hot" MacArthur jokingly said.

"Nice polka dots" Sanders joked.

"What?! I thought these were bullet holes" MacArthur said.

"How did you think that? Are you colourblind or something?" Sanders asked.

"No, are you colourblind?" MacArthur asked.

"If that was an insult you failed" Sanders said. "Look, let's just forget this"

"So I win" MacArthur said.

"Let's not turn this into another dune buggy race" Sanders said. "I'm tired of being treated like your own personal crash test dummy"

"Ha! You're adorable when you talk nonsense" MacArthur said. "Let's rock this!"

Josee steps out of her changing room and slide on the ice over to the Police Cadets. She pushes MacArthur over into some trash cans.

"Sorry about that. It's slippery out here" Josee said, attempting to fake sadness.

 **Team Interview**

"The Cadets are riding out coattails a little too much" Josee said. "I think a little push into last place will help"

Jacques giggles.

"I love it when you use word play" Jacques said.

 **End Interview**

MacArthur's tongue has frozen to the trash can she fell on.

"Come on! Get up!" Sanders exclaimed.

"My thung ith throzen to the can" MacArthur tried to say.

"What?" Sanders asked.

"I thaid: My thung ith throzen to the can" MacArthur said.

Meanwhile, on the frozen ice sheet all the teams but the Ice Dancers and Police Cadets are racing. Some sort of snow ape is fishing in the middle of the ice sheet.

"Dad, they're a gorilla up ahead" Junior said.

"Don't be silly Junior" Dwayne said. "There aren't gorillas in Siberia. Weren't you paying attention in geography cla- Oh my gosh that is a gorilla... Is it fishing?'

"I think so" Junior said.

The snow ape's hook gets stuck on the back on Dwayne and Junior's yacht.

"Um... Now it's behind us" Junior said.

Their yacht hits a rock on the ground which sends the snow ape flying into the air. The snow ape grabs on to the sail of the yacht that belongs to Rock and Spud.

"Dude, there's like a yeti on our sail" Spud said.

"Spud, stop being weird" Rock said.

Rock looks up and sees the yeti.

"Huh... There's something you don't see everyday" Rock said.

The yeti waves at them.

Meanwhile, back with the other yachts, Josee takes a screw out of one of them.

"What are you doing?" Jacques said.

"Let's just say the cadets can't catch a break" Josee said.

"I don't get it" Jacques said.

"Maybe you're the one with the screw loose" Josee said. "Come on, let's get another boat"

The camera pans to Sanders trying to get her partner off the trash can.

"Josee, Jacques help! Allies! Get over here!" Sanders yelled.

The Ice Dancers leave on their yacht.

"Did you hear something?" Jacques asked.

"Nope" Josee said evilly.

"Huh, I guess they couldn't hear us" Sanders said.

"Oh, they hearth you they jutht letht" MacArthur said.

Back with the other teams Dwayne and Junior are int he lead with their yachts.

"The Father & Son team are in the lead. But they might not have it for long" Don narrated.

The Sisters and Rockers pass Dwayne and Junior.

"Dad, is there any way we can speed up?" Junior asked.

"Gee I don't know sport. I've never been in a yacht before" Dwayne said. "Hang on... I think this might do something... No, wait, I have no idea what I'm doing"

 **Team Interview**

"I'll admit it we are not the most professional team" Dwayne said.

"I think they knew that already, dad" Junior said.

 **End Interview**

"I'm having so much fun out here" Kitty said. "Okay, we should cut off the Rockers so Dwayne and Junior can pass them"

"Why would I risk doing that?" Emma asked.

"Aren't we sort of in an alliance?" Kitty asked. "Plus we could use their help later"

"Are they in danger?" Emma asked.

"Well no" Kitty said.

"Are they in last place?" Emma asked.

"No" Kitty said.

"So they aren't in danger of being eliminated?" Emma said.

"I guess not" Kitty said. "But we made a deal-"

"Yes or no!" Emma exclaimed.

"No" Kitty said.

"Okay then, so their fine" Emma said.

"I hate it when you lawyer me" Kitty said.

"I am super good at it aren't I?" Emma said.

"Way too good" Kitty said.

Back with the Police Cadets, MacArthur's tongue is still stuck to the trash can.

"We need to find water or something to get you free" Sanders said.

"No tithm for thath" MacArthur said. "I hath a plan"

MacArthur somehow gets off the ground with her tongue still on the trash can.

"Wow... You are really strong" Sanders said.

"Thanths" MacArthur said.

Meanwhile, the Sisters are currently in the lead of the yacht race.

"I see the borehole!" Kitty exclaimed. "Hey, why is it called the Kola Borehole?"

"Because Russians are weird. That's why" Emma said.

"That's not an answer" Kitty pointed out.

"Not the time Kitty" Emma said.

Emma tries to pull the breaks on the yacht but it doesn't work.

"Kitty! I need help! It's frozen!" Emma exclaimed.

Kitty goes over to Emma and helps her hit the breaks. The yacht stops just after the front half of it goes over the borehole.

"Wow... My life just flashed before my eyes" Kitty said.

"Come on, let's change out of these swimsuits before we freeze to death" Emma said.

Cut to later where Emma and Kitty have changed into their regular clothes and are over by the Don Box. Kitty takes the travel tip.

"Who's ready to go deep" Kitty read. "Um... I don't like the sound of that"

Cut to Don standing dangerously close to the edge of the borehole.

"After losing the space race Russia decided to go to the centre of the earth" Don said. "They stopped at the seven mile mark when they realised that nobody else was trying to beat them. Today, one partner must lower the other all the way to the bottom to find a ball. After that they grab the ball and are taken all the way back up. After that it's a footrace to the Chill Zone"

Cut to Don inside a sauna.

"Located at this lovely Russian steam bath" Don said. "As usual the last team here may be out of the race. I hope they take their time because I booked a rejuvenating caviar body scrub... Only rich people can afford it"

Back out on the ice the Rockers and Fashion Bloggers are trying to get past each other.

"Uh, please move" Tom said. "We want this lead"

"No way man" Rock said.

"Come on, we're in an alliance, it's what we do" Jen said.

"She has a point Rock" Spud said.

"Spud, I know what I'm doing" Rock said.

While they are arguing Josee and Jacques pass them.

"Yes! Second place!" Jacques cheered.

"And the cadets will come in last and be eliminated" Josee said.

The camera pans to the Goths.

"Hey, Ennui, should we speed up?" Crimson asked.

"Life is always going too fast. It sucks the life out of everything" Ennui said.

"So true" Crimson said. "But was that a yes or a no"

"It's a yes" Ennui said.

The camera pans all the way back to the Police Cadets. MacArthur still has her tongue stuck to the trash can.

"Okay seriously, you need to get rid of that thing" Sanders said. "It's slowing us down"

"How do youth suggestht I do thatht?" MacArthur asked.

"Hold on" Sanders said.

Sanders makes a weird noise.

"Wath are youth doing?" MacArthur asked.

Sanders spits and it hits MacArthur's cheek.

"Sorry, I've never done this before" Sanders said. "Let me try again"

"Doth even thinth about ith" MacArthur said.

Meanwhile back at the Kola Borehole. Kitty is suspended in a harness over the borehole by her sister.

"Wait, this thing is seven miles down?" Kitty asked. "Will there still be air?"

"I have no idea" Emma said."I want a job someday so I'm studying law. Not science"

Kitty turns the light on her helmet on.

"Wish me luck" Kitty said.

Josee and Jacques prance over to the borehole and blow kisses at the camera.

"Enough with that move already" Kitty said.

"Yeah, we get it, you're ice dancers" Emma said.

"Nobody cares" Kitty said.

 **Team Interview**

"I'm going to make sure she never comes out of that hole" Josee said.

"Good! Nobody insults the great sport of ice dancing" Jacques said.

 **End Interview**

Josee and Jacques are debating who should go into the borehole.

"You know you need to put this on" Jacques said, holding up the harness.

"You know I don't do well in tight spaces" Josee said.

"The cranking requires upper body strength" Jacques pointed out. "You would never get me back to the top"

"But it's so dark and tight down there" Josee said.

"If things get too claustrophobic I promise to pull you back up" Jacques said.

"Okay" Josee said.

Cut to later where Josee is now in harness.

"Are you ready?" Jacques asked.

"Yes" Josee said.

Jacques starts to lower his partner into the hole.

"Pull me back up!" Josee screamed.

Jacques pulls her back up.

"I'm sorry, that was silly" Josee said. "Go"

"Okay" Jacques said.

Jacques lowers Josee again.

"Back up! Back up!" Josee yelled.

Jacques lifts her up.

"I can do this..." Josee said nervously. "Go!"

Cut to Jacques talking to the camera while lowering Josee down.

"You know, at least all this cranking up and down is keeping me warm" Jacques said.

"Pull me back up! Back up!" Josee shouted from off screen.

Meanwhile at the bottom of the borehole, Kitty has made it there.

"Oh, Emma, it's nice and warm down here" Kitty said.

"Well it's not up here, so find a ball" Emma said through Kitty's earpiece.

Kitty looks around and the light from her helmet reveals a red ball. She grabs it.

"I found one, lift me up" Kitty said.

"Got it" Emma said.

"The Sisters secure their first place position" Don narrated.

Cut to above ground on the lake where the Rockers and Fashion Bloggers are racing.

"But the third and fourth place teams are trying to secure it too" Don continued.

"Just let us pass!" Jen exclaimed.

"No way man!" Rock said.

"Maybe we should all chill or whatever" Spud said.

"No Spud, this is about the principal" Rock said.

"Uh guys, look behind you" Tom said.

Rock and Jen look behind them to see the Father & Son and Goths catching up to them.

"Hi" Junior said.

Jen looks back in front of her and realises that all the yachts are getting closer to the borehole.

"Hit the breaks!" Jen exclaimed.

Tom hits the breaks and all four yachts end up crashing into the changing booths.

"I am in so much pain and I love it" Ennui said.

"Same" Crimson said.

Jacques looks over and notices the crash knocked out his swimsuit.

"My swimsuit!" Jacques exclaimed.

He lets go of the crank and runs to grab is swimsuit. This causes Josee to fall deeper into the hole.

"Jacques!" Josee yelled.

Jacques runs back and grabs the crank.

"Sorry Josee" Jacques said.

"Phew... I'm okay" Josee said.

Josee realises how deep underground she is and starts breathing heavily.

"Pull me up!" Josee screamed.

"Wait! Wait! Listen to me Josee" Jacques said through the earpiece. "Four more teams just arrived and Kitty is on her way back up. You need to focus. Take a deep breath and imagine yourself doing something you love"

Josee spots Kitty getting closer to her.

"You know what i love?" Josee asked.

"Dancing like the wind across the ice?" Jacques guessed.

"No" Josee said. "Messing with other teams. Lower me down!"

Meanwhile, above ground Dwayne and Junior are trying to decide who should go down.

"Son, I don't want you to get hurt down there" Dwayne said. "I should go"

"There's now way I'll be able to get you up and down. You're twice my size" Junior said.

"That is a good point" Dwayne said. "Will you be okay down there?"

"I'm thirteen. Not three. I know what I'm doing" Junior said.

"If you say so..." Dwayne said nervously.

The camera pans over to the Goths having a similar conversation.

"I want to be in there" Crimson said. "The dark is so welcoming"

"So do I" Ennui said.

"Only one of us can be in there" Crimson said.

"Fine" Ennui said. "Take Loki with you. He looks like he'd like it"

Loki hops out of Ennui's shirt and into Crimson's hands.

"Hi Loki" Crimson said.

Loki crawls into Crimson's shirt.

The camera pans over to the Rockers.

"Spud do you think you'll be able to lift me up and down?" Rock asked.

"No way man" Spud said.

"Will you be able to grab a ball?" Rock asked.

"I guess so" Spud said.

"Was that a yes or no?" Rock asked.

"Probably a yes" Spud said.

"Okay, put this harness on" Rocks said, while holding up the harness.

The camera moves over to the Fashion Bloggers.

"I think you should go down into the pit" Jen said.

"Why's that?" Tom asked.

"How do I put this... I think I have more upper body strength than you" Jen said.

"Yeah... That's fair" Tom said. "Hand me that harness"

Meanwhile down in the borehole Kitty is going up and Josee it going down. Their paths cross.

"Hey, so are those balls in plain sight or are they hard to find?" Josee asked.

"With these helmet lights it's actually pretty easy" Kitty said.

"I see..." Josee said.

Josee punches out Kitty's helmet light and takes her ball.

"Up Jacques! Up!" Josee exclaimed.

Josee starts to go up.

"Hey get back here!" Kitty exclaimed.

Cut to above ground where Josee is getting out of the pit.

"Emma, Josee took our ball" Kitty said through the earpiece.

"Cheaters! You're filthy cheaters!" Emma exclaimed.

 **Team Interview**

"Oh boohoo, I'm going to cry right into my suitcase of one million dollars" Josee said.

"You know she was saying cheaters but all I could hear was winners" Jacques said.

 **Second Interview**

"The next best thing to winning the million would be seeing the Ice Dancers get eliminated" Kitty said.

"And if we cold assist in that in any way we will" Emma said.

 **End Interview**

Down in the pit Kitty is being lowered back down.

"She smashed my light, I can't see anything" Kitty said.

"You'll just have to feel around" Emma said through the earpiece. "We still have a chance Kit. The Cadets aren't even here yet"

Meanwhile, Sanders is trying to pull the trash can off of her partner. MacArthur slaps Sanders.

"Ow! I'm trying to help!" Sanders exclaimed.

Sanders tries to pull the trash can again.

"Ow! Leggoth!" MacArthur exclaimed.

Back at the Kola Borehole Jacques his helping Josee out of her harness.

"This was easier than taking candy from a baby you hate" Josee said.

"Just wait! You'll get what's coming to you" Emma said angrily.

"If you mean first place, than yes. We will" Josee said.

"Emma, I made it to the bottom" Kitty said through Emma's earpiece.

Emma stops cranking.

"Thank God. My arms are killing me" Emma said.

Down at the bottom of the borehole Kitty is trying to find a ball without a light.

"I'm feeling around but it's really creepy and I'm kind of freaking out" Kitty said.

 **Team Interview**

"I really hate those ice dancers right now" Emma said.

"Ice dancing isn't a real sport" Kitty said.

"Pretty sure it is" Emma said.

"Really? Well now I need to check" Kitty said.

 **End Interview**

Meanwhile at the Chill Zone, Josee and Jacques arrive.

"We're here!" Josee cheered.

They look around and realise Don isn't there.

"Huh, where's Don?" Jacques asked.

Don walks over to them.

Hi guys, bad news" Don said. "Since you didn't reach the bottom of the hole and destroyed a helmet light that was property of our show you get a thirty minute penalty"

"Seriously?! That's so not fair" Josee said angrily.

"Actually it is" Don said. "There's a rule book and everything"

"This penalty won't stop us" Josee said.

Meanwhile, the Police Cadets are still on their ice yacht. MacArthur sees the borehole.

"There it ith!" MacArthur said.

"Okay, I'll hit the breaks" Sanders said.

Sanders tries to pull the break lever but it breaks apart.

"Our brake is broken!" Sanders exclaimed. "We're gonna fall down the hole!"

"Not on my wath" MacArthur said.

MacArthur picks up a rope and hands it to Sanders.

"Tie thith to the yatht" MacArthur said.

Sanders ties the rope to the front of the yacht.

"Done" Sanders said.

MacArthur ties the other end around herself. She then grabs on to the trash can and jumps off the yacht. This causes the yacht to slow down and stop right before going off the edge of the borehole. MacArthur lets go of the can and her tongue is finally unstuck from it.

"Ow! My tongue!" MacArthur exclaimed.

Cut to MacArthur talking to the camera while standing next to the trash can.

"That good for nothing Josee will get what's coming to her" MacArthur said. "Or my name isn't Valentina Escobar"

A raccoon crawls out of the trash can and chatters something.

"Exactly" MacArthur said.

Meanwhile down at the bottom of the Kola Borehole Kitty is still looking around. Tom is down there with her.

"Tom, do you think you could help me find a ball" Kitty asked. "I know we aren't on the same team but it would be a real help"

"I don't know" Tom said. "I kind of have a lot of other stuff on going with me"

Tom sees a ball on the ground and picks it up.

"Well, I should go now. Bye Kitty" Tom said. "Pull me up Jen"

Tom is lifted off the ground.

"Wait, don't go, it's terrifying down here" Kitty said.

Meanwhile above ground, Sanders and MacArthur are deciding who should go down.

"The reason I'm hesitant is because you are reckless" Sanders said. "And this is a seven mile drop. I need to know that you aren't going to do what you always do"

"By that do you mean: Help us win?" MacArthur said. "Because that is what I always do"

The camera pans over to Jen helping Tom out of his harness.

"Come on, let's go right now" Tom said.

"Okay" Jen said.

The camera pans back over to the Police Cadets.

"Okay, this situation is getting slightly worse" Sanders said.

Meanwhile Kitty is still underground. Junior is looking around too.

"Hey, Junior, can you help me out?" Kitty asked.

"Of course I can" Junior said.

"Hear that Em?" Kitty said into her earpiece. "Junior is going to help us because we're in an alliance. Isn't that great?"

"Yes Kitty, I get it" Emma said through the earpiece. "You were right"

Junior shines his light on a ball.

"Found one" Junior said.

He picks up the ball.

"Dad, I need you to swap headsets with Emma and then pull me up" Junior said into his earpiece. "I'm giving Kitty my helmet so she has a light"

"Thanks Junior" Kitty said.

Junior gives Kitty his helmet.

"Good luck" Junior said.

Junior is lifted off the ground.

Meanwhile, back at the Chill Zone, the Ice Dancers' penalty ends.

"Ahem, your penalty has expired" Don said.

"Yes!" Josee cheered.

Jacques and Josee walk over to the Chill Zone.

"You get first place" Don said. "Proving that sometimes bending the rules pays off"

 **Team Interview**

"Once again, cheating proves that we're better than everyone else" Josee said.

 **End Interview**

Back at the Kola Borehole Ennui is cranking Dwayne is helping his son out of the harness.

"Great work Junior" Dwayne said. "I was getting a bit worried about you"

"Well I did it all by myself" Junior said. "Now come on, let's go"

The camera pans over to the Police Cadets who are still deciding who should get in the harness.

"Come on, another team just got out" MacArthur said. "Would you please clip in?"

"I'm still not one hundred percent sure" Sanders said.

Meanwhile at the Chill Zone, Tom and Jen arrive.

"Second place!" Don announced.

"Yes!" Tom cheered.

"We did it" Jen said.

Dwayne and Junior run up to Don next.

"Third!" Don said.

"Not too shabby" Dwayne said.

"Dad, nobody says that" Junior said.

Meanwhile down in the pit Sanders is being lowered down.

"Okay, I'm doing good" Sanders said. "The other teams are still down here"

Sanders sees Spud being lifted up.

"Oh hey police lady" Spud said. "I haven't seen you in a while. Rock's taking me back up. It's like a amusement park ride"

"Okay, the Goths and Sisters are still down there" Sanders said.

Sanders spots Crimson being raised up.

"Hi or whatever" Crimson said.

"I should just shut up now" Sanders said.

"You'd better" MacArthur said through the earpiece.

Cut to the Chill Zone where the Rockers arrive.

"Fourth!" Don announced.

 **Team Interview**

"Wow, we really need to step up our game if we want to beat our kind-of-enemies" Rock said.

"Wait, who?" Spud asked.

"The Fashion Bloggers" Rock said.

"But aren't we in second?" Spud asked.

"No, they're in second" Rock said. "We're in fourth"

"Bummer" Spud said.

"Couldn't have said it better myself man" Rock said.

 **End Interview**

Crimson and Ennui run over to the Chill Zone.

"Fifth!" Don announced.

"Yay or whatever I guess" Ennui said.

"Yeah" Crimson said.

"Looks like there are only two teams left out there" Don said. "The Sisters and the Police Cadets. Which one gets to stay?"

Back at the Kola Borehole Emma is waiting to hear back from Kitty.

"Emma! I found a ball!" Kitty said through the earpiece.

"That's great, I'll start cranking you back up" Emma said.

The camera pans over to MacArthur.

"Uh oh, Sanders we may need to speed things up" MacArthur said.

"Don't do what I think you're about to do" Sanders said through the earpiece.

MacArthur gives a fast push to the crank and it starts going in circles causing the rope to go down faster. Sanders starts screaming. MacArthur looks at the camera.

"Kitty's on the back up and I need to think fast" MacArthur said. "Sanders will be fine. I'm using science or algebra or something. Let me count: Four Mississippi, five Mississippi, six Missisippi"

Cut to Kitty being raised out of the pit. Sanders falls past Kitty and hits the ground.

"My arm!" Sanders exclaimed.

 **Team Interview**

"What was crazy!" Kitty exclaimed.

Emma nods in agreement

 **Second Interview**

"Stick a fork in that team" Josee said. "They are done"

"What... Oh I get it. Very clever" Jacques said.

 **End Interview**

MacArthur is awkwardly standing around.

"Um... You see any balls down there?" MacArthur asked.

"My arm is broken!" Sanders shouted through the earpiece.

"I may have misjudged the depth by one or two Mississippis" MacArthur said.

Meanwhile, Emma and Kitty arrive at the Chill Zone.

"Sisters, you're in sixth place!" Don announced.

"Yes! I'm still in it!" Emma cheered.

"High five Em!" Kitty said.

Emma and Kitty high five.

Back at the borehole, MacArthur is lifting Sanders out of the pit.

"It's my fault. Me and my win at all costs attitude" MacArthur said via voice over.

MacArthur helps Sanders out of the harness, picks her up, and start carrying her towards an ambulance.

"My dad always said: MacArthur only losers don't win" MacArthur narrated. "So if you don't score that point, win that trophy, or finish that plate of hot dogs you're a loser"

Cut to MacArthur sitting in the waiting room of a hospital by herself.

"I wish it was my arm" MacArthur said. "But it'd be weird if my arm was on her body"

Cut to later where Sanders and MacArthur arrive at the Chill Zone. Sanders is now wearing a cast over one of her arms.

"Sanders, MacArthur, I'm sorry to say this but you are the last team to arrive" Don said.

"Yeah, I was able to figure that out" Sanders said.

"I am so sorry Sanders" MacArthur said.

"It's fine. This isn't the first time you've got me in trouble" Sanders said. "But you really need to clean up your act"

"I promise" MacArthur said.

"Not to intrude, but you're eliminated. Please leave" Don said.

"Oh, right..." MacArthur said.

Footage of Sanders and MacArthur plays while they narrate over it.

"Well that went poorly" MacArthur said as a clip of her ripping apart a mattress in the Australian prison played.

"Seventh place isn't that bad" Sanders said over a clip of MacArthur carrying her over the hot coals in Hawaii.

"That just makes it more disappointing that we didn't win" MacArthur said as a clip of them and the Ice Dancers driving off a cliff in Alberta was shown.

"I hope the Ice Dancers don't win" Sanders said as the footage switched to the two of them walking away.

"That'd be the worst" MacArthur said. "Am I right?"

MacArthur nudges Sanders' bad arm.

"Ow!" Sanders exclaimed.

"Oops... Sorry" MacArthur said.

"It's fine" Sanders said. "You know, this cast is surprisingly comfortable"

* * *

 **Like usual I had a lot of fun writing this chapter. Especially the challenge. As for the elimination, I like the Police Cadets but they got very far in the canon season so I decided to eliminate them here. I really wanted to keep them in for longer but I decided this was a good time. Let me know what you think of the chapter.**


	23. Darjeel With It

"Last time on the Ridonculous Race! Our teams hit the cold yachts of Siberia. Josee punched Kitty's lights out. Which got the Ice Dancers in first... Again. And after getting slowed down by the Ice Dancers Sanders and MacArthur decided to speed things up. Too bad that ended in a seven mile drop for Sanders. It also ended the race for them. We're down to six teams. Let's see who will survive on: The Ridonculous Race!"

Don is in the Russian sauna wearing a towel. He is standing near the Don Box.

"Welcome back to Siberia" Don said. "Where yesterdays cheaters... I mean winners, are collecting the first travel tip"

The Ice Dancers walk up to the Don Box.

 **Team Interview**

"Perfect! Another Gold! Now we need to see who to go after next" Jacques said.

"Let's see The Rockers and Fashion Bloggers are in a rivalry so we will let them be for now and the Father & Son are not important right now. We will focus on them later" Josee said. "We need to go after the Goths and Sisters"

"But which one?" Jacques asked.

Josee whispers something to Jacques.

"Haha, Perfect!" Jacques cheered.

 **End Interview**

Josee grabs a tip.

"We're going to Darjeeling India" Josee read.

Cut to a background of the Indian flag with a postcard from Darjeeling to accompany it.

"Yes, Darjeeling. Where the world's finest teas are grown" Don narrated. "Most of which I can't pronounce"

Cut to Don in India near a Don Box.

"Teams must take a flight to Bagdogra India and then take taxis to the mountain of Darjeeling, AKA where the next Don Box is" Don said.

Back in Russia the Rockers are trying to get a cab.

"Hey! Taxi man! Stop!" Spud yelled.

A taxi stops. Emma gets in front of the taxi and jumps on the cars hood.

"We call this one!" Emma exclaimed.

"Um... Okay then" Rock said.

Emma and Kitty get inside the taxi.

"What was that for?" Kitty asked.

"There are only six teams left" Emma said. "Every second counts"

"All the teams are on the same flight" Kitty said.

"What?" Emma asked.

"Didn't you read the travel tip?" Kitty asked.

"I was in a hurry" Emma said.

Cut to a plane in the air. Inside the plane Emma and Kitty are sitting down. Emma looks angry.

"You okay?" Kitty said.

"I just threw myself in front of a car for nothing" Emma said.

"I wish that was the first time I've heard you say that" Kitty said.

Josee walks up to Emma and Kitty.

"Hi girls. What are you talking about?" Josee asked in a way that sounded like.

"We don't want to talk to you" Emma said.

"Why not?" Josee asked.

"Well for starters you're like, twice our age" Kitty said.

"Hey! I'll have you know I am only twenty!" Josee exclaimed.

"Wait, what? I'm a year older than you?" Emma said confusedly. "How is that possible. You look like you're at least thirty one"

"Screw you!" Josee shouted.

Josee storms off and sits down next to Jacques.

"So, did you find anything about the Sisters?" Jacques asked.

"I found out they think I'm thirty one" Josee said. "And that just makes me want to eliminate them more!"

"Calm down Josee. It's not that big a deal" Jacques said.

"Not that big a deal?! How could they mistake me for thirty one?!" Josee yelled angrily. "Look at my pretty face! I am clearly twenty!"

The camera pans over to Tom and Jen trying to relax.

"Ah, I can't wait to go to India" Tom said.

"Me too" Jen said. "I want to try some tea"

"Same" Tom said.

Tom feels somebody kick the back of his seat.

"What the heck!" Tom exclaimed.

Tom looks behind him to see the Rockers.

"Okay, which one of you kicked me?" Tom asked.

Rock points to Spud.

"Sorry" Spud said.

"It's fine" Tom said. "It's not like you'll be here for much longer"

"Wait, what?" Rock asked.

"Honestly we weren't expecting you to get this far" Jen said.

"But you know, may the best team win and all that" Tom said.

"We're the best team, right?" Spud asked.

"We'll see" Jen said.

"Gee thanks" Spud said.

"Spud, that was supposed to be an insult" Rock said.

Cut to the plane landing and the teams exiting the airport. Each team gets into a taxi.

Cut to the inside of Dwayne and Junior's taxi.

"Hey son, do you think I should try and grow a beard?" Dwayne asked.

"Absolutely not" Junior said.

"Why's that?" Dwayne asked.

"Well one, mom would never let it fly" Junior said. "Two, It'd look terrible on you. And three, I'm pretty sure you can't even grow one"

"That's fair" Dwayne said.

Cut to the inside of the Ice Dancers' taxi.

"We will crush these other teams" Josee said. "Like a... Uh... Jacques, help me out here?"

"Ice crusher?" Jacques suggested.

"No, something else" Josee said.

"A meat grinder?" Jacques suggested.

"That'll do" Josee said. "We will crush these other teams like a meat grinder"

"We're here" The driver said.

"Good" Josee said.

Josee and Jacques get out of the driver.

"Ha ha! Still first!" Jacques cheered.

Josee and Jacques suddenly collapse to the ground due to the heat.

"Heat... Too strong..." Jacques said weakly.

The camera pans over to Emma who has a few misplaced hairs.

"Ugh, this humidity is bad for my hair" Emma said.

The camera zooms out to reveal Kitty whose pigtails have puffed up.

"Tell me about it" Kitty said.

The camera pans to Tom and Jen getting out of their cab and looking very sweaty.

"This sweat is ruining my shirt" Jen said.

"And my hair" Tom said.

"I have an idea to protect our hair" Jen said. "Do you still have those fez's?"

"You bet" Tom said.

Tom takes two fez's out from behind his back.

The camera pans to Rock and Spud are walking towards the Don Box very slowly.

"Dude, this is worse than that sauna in Finland" Rock said.

"I know, man" Spud said.

"I think my brain is melting" Rock said.

"Mine already did" Spud said.

Rock presses the button on the Don Box and grabs the travel tip.

"It says: Tea time" Rock read.

"I hope it's iced tea" Spud said.

Cut to Don in the middle of a tea field next to an Indian woman with a basket strapped to her back. Don is keeping himself cool with an electric fan.

"Oh,wouldn't that be nice" Don said. "But no, each racer must put on one of these baskets and fill it to the brim with these tea leaves"

The camera cuts to Don inside a shop next to another Indian woman.

"Once full teams must bring there bags to this local" Don said. "If she approves of their haul she'll give them their next tip"

Cut to Crimson and Ennui picking tea leaves out in the field. They are both sweating but they aren't having much of a reaction.

"I feel like my skin is melting from the sun" Ennui said.

"Mine too" Crimson said.

"Actually, I think it is" Ennui said.

"What?" Crimson asked.

Crimson takes a make up makeup compact out of her pocket and looks in the mirror. She sees that the sun is causing her make up to melt.

"Ah!" Crimson exclaimed in a way that still sounded uninterested. "You're melting too"

"Argh!" Ennui exclaimed in the same way.

Ennui and Crimson try to get the make up to stay on their face by pushing it back on. But this just causes their make up to fall off.

 **Team Interview**

Crimson and Ennui don't have their make up but are still wearing their wigs.

"It's happening again" Crimson said. "I thought this new make up was water resistant?"

"It's not heat resistant" Ennui said. "I can't believe this. With out our make up we're totally different"

"I have more make up" Crimson said. "We can put it back on after the challenge"

"I guess I won't be needing this" Ennui said, as he took off his wig.

"I'm keeping mine" Crimson said.

 **End Interview**

Josee and Jacques walk up to the Rockers and Fashion Bloggers.

"It's time to get rid of those sisters for good" Josee said.

"Why?" Spud asked.

"They thought Josee was thirty one" Jacques said.

"How could they mistake my incredibly youthful face for someone over the age of twenty!" Josee said angrily.

 **Team Interview**

"To be honest I thought she was at least forty" Tom said.

"Me too" Jen said.

 **End Interview**

"So what exactly is the plan?" Rock asked.

"Yeah, that Emma is a bit... Competitive" Jen said.

"I was going to say scary" Tom said.

"That works too" Jen said.

"All we have to do is open the bottoms of their baskets with out them noticing" Josee said.

"And we take the leaves that fall out" Jacques said.

"We need a distraction" Josee said.

"I can do a chicken impression" Spud said. "Check this out: A clock-clock-clocka"

"That did not sound like a chicken" Jacques said. "You just sound like you're saying "Clock" over and over again"

"Is yours better?" Spud asked.

"Much better" Jacques said. "Listen: Caw-"

"Not the time" Josee said.

"Yeah, I'm not getting involved with this" Jen said.

"Same" Tom said.

"Seriously, we're stuck with the rock and roll idiots?" Josee muttered.

Tom and Jen start walking away.

"Hey! Guess what fashionistas! You're out of this alliance!" Josee yelled. "And that means you're in the crosshairs of our thingys- The bullseye of the- We're coming for you next! Get ready!"

"Easy Josee" Jacques yelled. "Don't give yourself a heart attack"

"I am only twenty!" Josee yelled.

"Calm down. Young people still get heart attacks... Right?" Jacques said.

 **Team Interview**

"I'm glad we don't have to deal with them anymore" Tom said.

"Yeah, I didn't really care for those Rockers" Jen said.

"We can totally do this on our own... Right?" Tom asked.

 **Second Interview**

"There's no way those fashion dudes can do this on their own" Rock said.

"Oh yeah, totally" Spud said.

 **End Interview**

Elsewhere in the tea fields Crimson and Ennui are picking tea leaves.

"I feel like people are looking at me weird right now" Crimson said. "Are you getting that?"

"Kind of..." Ennui said. "I wish I had my make up right now"

Loki sticks its head out of Ennui's shirt and its make up has melted off too.

"Ah! I forgot what it looked like with no make up!" Crimson exclaimed.

 **Team Interview**

"We spent ninety nine point nine percent of our time with our make up on" Crimson said. "Yes, that includes while we're sleeping"

"I hate feeling normal" Ennui said.

"At least I still have my wig" Crimson said. "It makes me feel cool"

 **End Interview**

Tom and Jen are picking leaves by themselves. Both of them are sweating.

"Oh God! These fez's look fashionable but are not protecting me at all!" Tom exclaimed.

"My shirt in drenched in sweat" Jen said.

"I need to lie down" Tom said

"I like that idea" Jen said

Tom and Jen lie down on the ground and look up at the sky.

"Why are there no clouds?" Tom asked.

Meanwhile, Dwayne and Junior are picking leaves.

"You know I saw the sun melt those Goths' make up off. Do you think it'd do the same thing will happen to my tattoo?" Dwayne asked hopefully.

"Do you know how tattoos work?" Junior asked.

"Kind of... Sort of... Not really" Dwayne said. "Is getting it removed just as painful as getting it in the first place"

"I've heard from some people it's more painful" Junior said.

"Huh... I wonder if I should just start wearing makeup to cover it?" Dwayne asked.

Meanwhile, the Sisters are picking tea leaves.

"This is such hard work... I can't believe people do this for a living" Kitty said.

The camera pans to the Ice Dancers and Rockers watching them.

"Here's the plan" Josee said. "You two make some sort of a noise to distract Emma and Kitty while me and Jacques steal their tea leaves"

"Do we get a share of the tea leaves?" Rock asked.

"Isn't friendship reward enough?" Jacques said.

"Seems legit" Spud said.

"Great" Josee said. "We'll get closer to them"

Josee and Jacques walk away.

"Okay, I'm ready to do my chicken impression" Spud said. "A clock-clock-clocka! A clock-clock-clocka"

"Stop! That is not what a chicken sounds like" Rock said.

"Could you do better?" Spud said.

"Yeah" Rock said. "Listen to this: Chee-chicka!Chee-chicka! Chee-chicka!"

"That's not what a chicken sounds like man" Spud said.

Emma and Kitty walk over to Rock and Spud.

"Um... What are you doing?" Kitty asked.

"We're trying to agree on what a chicken sounds like" Rock said. "Can you help us out?"

"They make a clucking noise" Emma said. "That's like, kindergarten level stuff"

"Really?" Kitty asked. "I thought it was more of a: Bawca-bawca-bawca!"

"I'm surrounded by idiots" Emma said.

While they are all talking Josee and Jacques unhook the bottom of Emma and Kitty's baskets and take the tea leaves that fall out.

"Well we'd better be going" Rock said.

"Bye I guess" Spud said.

Rock and Spud walk away. They meet up with the Ice Dancers. Josee and Jacques are carrying the leaves they stole.

"Did you get the leaves?" Spud asked.

"Why else do you think we're holding these?" Josee asked.

"Do we get our share?" Rock asked.

"Yeah, sure" Josee said.

Josee gives Rock and Spud a small handful.

The camera pans to Emma and Kitty picking leaves.

"Hey, does your basket feel light?" Emma asked.

"Now that you mention it, yeah" Kitty said.

They look down and see that their baskets were unhooked.

"What the- What's this?" Kitty asked.

"Ugh! Those rock musicians must have been a distraction" Emma said. "They were in an alliance with the Ice Dancers, remember! I knew nobody was that bad at making chicken noises"

Cut to Don inside the shop.

"All the teams are scrambling to finish first" Don said. "Who will it be? Whose drive and determination will put them in first place. Ahead of everyone else here by-"

Don looks over and sees that Josee and Jacques are already there with fulls baskets.

"You guys again?" Don said. "Why can't you just get eliminated already"

"In your dreams" Josee said.

"Yes, I do dream about it" Don said. "And what sweet dreams they are"

Josee gives her teams' baskets to the Indian woman.

"It's all there" Josee said.

The woman gives them the travel tip.

"Get sent reeling on the Darjeeling" Josee read.

Cut to Don at a train station near a train.

"This is the Darjeeling express" Don said. "The train cars here alternate between people, animals, people, animals, and so on. Each team will be assigned to a passenger car based on the order in which they arrived. But the catch is, before the teams arrive at the Chill Zone station they must battle their way to the front of the car"

Back in the shop the Rockers and the Father & Son arrive in there with their tea leaves.

"Here you go ma'am" Dwayne said as he gave the tea leaves to the woman at the counter.

She hands him the travel ticket.

"Take this tea lady" Spud said.

Spud gives the woman the tea leaves and she gives him the travel tip.

Meanwhile, out in the field of tea Emma and Kitty are picking tea leaves as fast as they can. Emma looks very angry.

"You okay Em?" Kitty asked.

"I can't believe those rock musicians would trick us!" Emma said angrily. "I also can't believe they can't do a good chicken impression"

"Mine was good. Right?" Kitty asked.

"It was closer than theirs. I'll give you that" Emma said.

"Was that an insult or a a compliment?" Kitty asked.

"No comment" Emma said.

Meanwhile, Tom and Jen are still lying on the ground and looking very uncomfortable.

"How long have we been here?" Jen asked.

"Twenty minutes..." Tom said.

"What?!" Jen exclaimed. "Come on, we need to work faster"

"Just one second..." Tom said weakly.

"No time Tom!" Jen said. "Get up!"

Tom and Jen get up from the ground.

"We can do this" Tom said.

Meanwhile at the shop Crimson and Ennui arrive with their tea leaves.

"Ah! Who are you!" Don explained. "Security!"

"We're the Goths... We lost our make up... Again" Crimson said.

"Oh, that explains some things" Don said.

Ennui gives the leaves to the woman at the counter. She gives him the travel tip.

"Thanks or something" Ennui said.

The Sisters run up to the counter with their leaves.

"We made it!" Emma said as she gave her leaves to the woman.

The woman gives Emma a travel tip.

"Woohoo! We made it!" Kitty exclaimed.

Tom and Jen make it into the shop last.

"Come on, we need to hurry" Jen said.

Tom gives his teams' leaves to the woman.

"Here you are" Tom said.

The woman gives them the tip.

"You'd better hurry. That train is leaving soon" Don said,

Tom and Jen run on to the train and take their seat.

"Made it" Tom said.

The train starts moving.

"Attention teams" Don said over the trains speakers. "You can start making your way to the front of the train... Now!"

Cut to Josee and Jacques in the front of the train.

"What do we do?" Jacques asked. "Do we just wait for the other teams to get here?"

"I guess so..." Josee said. "Or we could bury the Sisters and everyone else too!"

"How exactly?" Jacques asked.

"Follow me" Josee said.

Josee walks over to the door and Jacques follows. They exit and end up outside the train where it is incredibly windy.

"See that?" Josee said, pointing to a bolt holding their car and the next one together. "They can't get us if there cars aren't attached to it"

"Very clever" Jacques said.

"Well, what are you waiting for?! Unattach us!" Josee exclaimed.

Jacques goes over to the bolt and tries to pull it out. But he seems to have some trouble with it.

"Josee, this is heavier than it looks!" Jacques yelled.

"Work harder!" Josee yelled.

Meanwhile, Dwayne and Junior walk up to their animal car.

"Okay, we only have to get through one car. This should be a piece of cake" Junior said.

"Yeah, let's do this!" Dwayne exclaimed.

Dwayne opens the door and a goat runs out and headbutts him in the chest. This launches Dwayne backwards into the previous car.

"Dad! Are you okay?" Junior asked.

"The world is spinning..." Dwayne said weakly.

Meanwhile, Rock and Spud make it to their first animal car.

"All right, let's see what's in here" Spud said.

"Yeah, let's do this" Rock said.

Rock opens the door to reveal a giant bull standing in their way.

"Uh oh..." Rock said.

"I am fearless!" Spud exclaimed.

Spud runs into the car. The bull charges at him. Spud gets out of the way and the bull crashes into the wall and is knocked out.

"Whoa, way to go Spud!" Rock said.

"Thanks" Spud said.

The camera pans back to Crimson and Ennui approaching their first animal car.

Crimson opens the car door and sees many chickens.

"Yeah... I am not going in there" Crimson said.

"Same" Ennui said.

"Hmm... I'm getting an idea" Crimson said. "Maybe we could climb on the roof to get there faster"

"Why not" Ennui said.

Crimson and Ennui climb up on the roof.

"Cool..." Ennui said.

"Let's go" Crimson said.

Crimson's wig gets blown off by the wind.

"Ah!" A voice from behind them exclaimed.

Crimson and Ennui look behind them to see the Sisters. Crimson's wig hit Kitty in the dace. Kitty takes the wig off her face.

"Hi..." Crimson said.

"Oh hey, you're up here too" Kitty said.

"You recognise us?" Ennui asked confusedly.

"We've seen you with out make up before" Emma said.

"Can I have my wig back?" Crimson asked sheepishly.

"Sure" Kitty said as she handed it back. "You look really pretty with out make up by the way"

"I don't know how to respond to that... You have too many positive emotions" Crimson said.

 **Team Interview**

"We aren't used to people seeing us like this" Ennui said.

"How much longer is this challenge?" Crimson asked.

"Too long" Ennui said.

 **End Interview**

Junior is helping his father off the ground.

"Are you going to be okay?" Junior asked.

"I'm fine... Let's go one more time..." Dwayne said.

They both hear footsteps on top of the train.

"What the heck is that?" Junior asked.

"Let's go check" Dwayne said.

Dwayne and Junior go outside and see the Sisters and Goths on the roof of the train.

"Oh, hey there Kitty" Junior said.

"Hi guys. Thanks for helping us out in the last challenge by the way" Kitty said.

"Hey, can we come up there with you?" Junior said.

"Sure" Kitty said.

"Now hold on there" Dwayne said. "I don't want to get hurt"

"Dad, we're on reality TV. They have all sorts of safety people working here" Junior said.

"Um... I'm thinking about it" Dwayne said. "Okay, fine"

"Come on up or whatever" Ennui said.

"Try not to fall off" Emma said.

"Em! Don't get them worried" Kitty said.

Meanwhile, in the back, Tom and Jen make it to the first animal car.

"I hope I don't get any animal hair on me" Tom said.

"By this point, I've just accepted the fact that this outfit I have is permanently ruined" Jen said.

"Well, let's open this door and hope it's not too bad" Tom said.

Tom opens the door to reveal lots of sleeping chickens.

"Okay, we need to be very quiet" Jen said.

Tom and Jen enter the animal car. The door slams behind them and this wakes the chickens. The chickens start running around.

"Ah! Run!" Tom yelled.

Tom and Jen exit the animal car covered in feathers.

"Yeah... That went badly..." Jen said.

"Maybe the next one will go better..." Tom said.

Meanwhile, Jacques is still trying to pull out the bolt but is failing.

"I'm going to throw out my back if I keep this up" Jacques said.

Josee looks over and sees that there's a lever.

"Hey, Jacques, I Just found a lever" Josee said.

"Oh... I wish I saw that before" Jacques said.

Jacques pulls the lever and their part of the train is unhooked from the rest.

"Bon voyage!" Jacques said.

Josee and Jacques go back into their car.

The camera moves over the car that just got unhooked. The Goths, Father & Son, and Sisters are on the roof.

"Ah! The cars are separating what do we do?!" Kitty exclaimed.

"I knew we should have stayed on the ground" Dwayne said.

 **Team Interview**

"I wish our make up was still on" Ennui said. "That way if we die we'd look cool doing it"

"Same" Crimson said.

 **End Interview**

"We need to jump!" Emma said.

Emma jumps to the car in front of it. Kitty follows.

"Come on everyone! Let's go!" Kitty said.

Crimson and Ennui jump to the next car.

"Dwayne! Junior! You need to jump!" Kitty shouted.

 **Team Interview**

"Do you think I should try and sue this show once we're out of here?" Dwayne asked.

"Why?" Junior asked.

"Because I was not told my life would be threatened at any point!" Dwayne exclaimed.

 **End Interview**

Junior jumps to the other side.

"Made it!" Junior exclaimed.

"Okay, I'm ready" Dwayne said.

Dwayne jumps to the other side but he misses the roof and smashes into the door.

"I'm okay..." Dwayne said weakly as he got up.

"Okay dad, we'll help you up here" Junior said.

"I don't feel like helping" Crimson said. "Unless you want me to... Or whatever"

"What she said... Or something" Ennui said.

Rock and Spud exit the detached car behind the other teams and see Dwayne.

"Hey man, did you unhook us?!" Rock angrily asked Dwayne.

"What?!" Dwayne exclaimed. "Just wait a-"

"He must have!" Spud exclaimed.

Spud takes off his shoe and throws it at Dwayne. This knocks Dwayne out.

"Whoopsie... That was my good shoe" Spud said.

"Dad!" Junior exclaimed.

"Come on, let's go down there and help Dwayne back up" Emma said.

"And maybe open that door or something" Ennui said.

The cars behind the Goths, Father & Son, and Sisters come to a stop. Rock and Spud hop off of the train and start running.

"Come on man, we need to catch up!" Rock exclaimed.

Tom and Jen hop off of the train and start running to catch up with the others.

"I see the Rockers!" Jen exclaimed.

"Come on! Let's follow them" Tom said.

"Let's not go too fast! My feet are killing me" Jen said.

"Hey man, they're catching up" Spud said.

"Should we do something?" Rock asked.

"I guess so" Spud said. "Just don't hurt them or anything"

Tom and Jen start to catch up to Rock and Spud.

"We're almost there" Tom said.

Rock lightly pushes Tom. This causes her to fall over and knock Tom over.

"Huh, he was surprisingly weak" Rock said.

 **Team Interview**

"I'm more into looking good than being strong" Tom said.

 **End Interview**

"We need a faster way to catch up..." Rock said. "Hmm... I think I have an idea"

"Really? What is it?" Spud asked.

"I still have some Choco-Oinks left over from China" Rocks said. "Would stale Choco-Oinks motivate you?"

"Do you even have to ask?!" Spud exclaimed.

Rock takes a handful of Choco-Oinks out of his pocket. Spud grabs them and eats them as fast as he can.

"Let's do this!" Spud yelled. "CHOCO-OINKS: AWAY!"

Spud grabs on to Rocks arm and starts running incredibly fast.

"Well! This sure is effective!" Rock yelled as he was being dragged behind Spud.

Back on the train the teams are down off the roof and trying to break through the door. Junior helps his dad off the ground.

"You feeling better?" Junior asked

"Yeah, I'll be good" Dwayne said. "As long as nobody else throws a shoe at me"

Ennui tries to open the door but it doesn't work.

"Should we try and break it down or just go back to the roof?" Ennui asked.

"I vote roof" Crimson said. "It's safer"

"I say we get in there!" Emma said angrily. "I want to tell those Ice Dancer what I think about them messing with us"

"Me too" Kitty said.

"I think we should go back to the roof" Junior said. "What do you think, dad?"

"Hmm... Good question" Dwayne said. "I think that-"

Dwayne is cut off when the train goes over a bump in the road and it causes him to fall off. He lands in a bush.

"Dad!" Junior exclaimed.

Meanwhile, Tom and Jen are running.

"I'm not sure how much longer I can do this..." Jen said.

"There has to be a better way" Tom said.

They see a young boy and a young girl on a tandem bike up ahead.

"Hey! Kids! Do you speak English?!" Tom yelled.

They stop their bike.

"Yes. A bit" The boy said.

"What do you need?" The girl asked.

"Can we borrow your bike?" Jen asked.

"Why?" The girl asked.

"It's a long story. We're on TV" Tom said. "Look, we'll give you these fez's"

"And I have some money" Jen said. "It's Canadian... But I'm sure you can get it exchanged or something"

"Okay" The boy said.

"Sure'" The girl said.

Tom gives the kids his and Jen's fez's. Jen takes a twenty dollar bill out of he pocket and gives it to the kids.

"Thank you" Jen said.

"We'll return this later" Tom said.

Tom and Jen get on the bike and start biking away.

Cut to Don waiting at the train station.

"Huh, I wonder what's taking that train so long" Don said.

The train pulls up to the station and stops. Junior hops of the train and starts running back towards his father.

"I'll help you dad!" Junior exclaimed.

Josee and Jacques get off the train and arrive at the Chill Zone.

"Ice Dancers, you're in first" Don said. "If nobody makes it in the next hour. You have a penalty"

"Us! What did we do?!" Jacques exclaimed.

"Seriously, you really think I wouldn't notice that the rest of the train is missing?" Don asked.

"Oh yeah... That thing" Josee said.

Emma and Kitty start running towards the Chill Zone.

"Yes! First place here we come!" Emma said.

Suddenly the Sisters are knocked over by Spud as he ran on his sugar high. Spud runs up to the Chill Zone dragging Rock behind him

"Rockers! You are in first" Don announced.

 **Team Interview**

"Woohoo! We got first place!" Rock cheered. "And we beat the Fashion Bloggers!"

"Wait, we won?" Spud asked. "And we beat them?!"

"Yes Spud, we beat them" Rock said.

"All right! High five man!" Spud exclaimed.

Rock and Spud high five.

 **Second Interview**

"Damn it! We lost the gold!" Josee said. "We still have five more teams left to crush!"

"Going after the Sisters didn't go as well as intended. I say we target the Goths" Jacques said. "Do you have any plans Josee?"

"Oh don't worry, those wannabe vampires will be defeated" Josee said. "And I have a plan"

 **End Interview**

Emma and Kitty walk over to the Chill Zone.

"Kitty, Emma, you are in second!" Don announced.

"Good enough for me" Emma said.

"Same" Kitty said.

Crimson and Ennui run over to the Chill Zone.

"Third!" Don said. "Please put on some makeup. You are freaking me out more than usual"

"Gladly" Crimson said.

"You said it" Ennui said.

Meanwhile, Junior finds his father and helps him off the ground.

"Thanks Junior" Dwayne said. "I think I'm going to be okay"

"That's a relief" Junior said.

Dwayne looks back and sees the Fashion Blogger catching up on their tandem bike.

"Run!" Dwayne exclaimed.

Back at the Chill Zone the Ice Dancers are waiting for their penalty to be up.

"Is it over yet!" Josee angrily said.

"Nope" Don said.

"How about now?" Jacques asked.

"You still have a minute" Don said.

Meanwhile, the Fashion Bloggers are catching up to the Father & Son on their bike.

"Faster!" Jen exclaimed.

"I'm peddling as hard as I can!" Tom said.

Their bike runs over a sharp rock. This causes a tire to be punctured and their bike to crash.

"No!" Jen exclaimed.

"Come on! We can still do this" Tom said.

Tom and Jen get up and start running.

Back at the Chill Zone Josee and Jacques are pacing around.

"Only thirty seconds left" Don said. "The clock is ticking down at such an astonishingly slow speed"

"Shut it!" Josee yelled.

Dwayne and Junior arrive at the Chill Zone.

"Fourth!" Don announced.

"Yes!" Dwayne cheered.

"Way to go dad!" Junior cheered.

"I need to go see a medic" Dwayne said.

"Out penalty has to be up now" Jacques said.

"Any second now" Don said.

Tom and Jen start to approach the Chill Zone.

"I see it!" Tom exclaimed.

"We're almost there" Jen said.

"Ice Dancers! Your penalty is up!" Don announced.

Josee and Jacques step into the Chill Zone.

"You get fifth place" Don said.

"We'll take it" Josee said.

Tom and Jen walk over to Don at the Chill Zone.

"Jen, Tom, you are in sixth. Which is also last" Don said. "Which also means you're eliminated"

"Dang it... I guess we did pretty good" Jen said.

"At least I still have more fez's waiting for me at home" Tom said.

Footage of Tom and Jen competing plays as they narrate over it.

"You know, I really didn't think we'd make it this far. This wasn't really all that bad" Tom said as a clip of him and Jen arguing in Romanian played.

"Yeah, I think I got to know you better and we got to meet all sorts of new people" Jen said while footage of them reluctantly sharing a cab with the Rockers was shown.

"I totally agree. We should try and call those actors some time" Tom said over a clip of them talking to the Actors in the Finnish sauna.

"And not to mention we totally made fez's a thing again" Jen said as the footage switched to them walking away from the train station.

"Thinking back on it. I don't really mind being eliminated" Tom said.

"Although, we should probably get a new bike for those kids" Jen said. "We kind of... Destroyed it"

"Oh yeah... That" Tom said. "Let's do that before we go to the airport"

* * *

 **Yes, I did lift that chicken noises jokes from Arrested Development (Which is a show I recommend). It was too good of a joke to pass up on. But I did write my own chicken noises instead of just copying the ones from the show. As for the elimination, I didn't know what else to do for the Fashion Bloggers. They were also beginning to overstay their welcome. Let me know what you think.**


	24. Last Tango in Buenos Aires

"Last time on the Ridonculous Race! The Rockers decided to get comfy with the Ice Dancers and even aided in attempting to sabotage the Sisters. The hot Indian sun proved too much for Crimson and Ennui's makeup and they spent another day as normal people... Well, normal-ish. Tom and Jen furthered themselves from their three way alliance but too bad for them they got eliminated. We're down to our final five teams. Who survive this next set of challenges? Find out on, the Ridonculous Race!"

"We are back in Darjeeling India where yesterday's winner, the Rockers are about to receive the first travel tip" Don said.

Rock and Spud run over to the Don Box.

 **Team Interview**

"It's super sweet to be back in first" Rock said. "We've won four legs on the race and I'm pretty sure we can go for five"

"Wait, we won four? I thought we only won the Arctic and Finland?" Spud asked.

"No Spud we won four. Those two, then the Super Team first place tie in Vietnam and then India" Rock said.

"Oh, right. Let's win for a sixth time!" Spud cheered.

"Fifth, Spud" Rock said.

 **End Interview**

Rock takes a travel tip from the Don Box.

"Sweet, we're going to Argentina" Rock read.

"Where's that?" Spud asked.

"I think it's the Caribbean" Rock said.

"Not even close" Don said.

Cut to a background of the Argentinian flag with a postcard from Buenos Aires to accompany it.

"The capital of Argentina, Buenos Aires, is a world class city" Don narrated. "Famous for it's love of football, theatre, and delicious red meat"

Cut to Don at an airport in Buenos Aires.

"Once teams arrive they'll find their next travel tip here" Don explained.

Cut to the other four teams getting into their taxis.

"Drive!" The four teams yelled at their drivers.

Cut to the inside of Dwayne and Junior's taxi.

"Son, I'm considering dropping out of the race" Dwayne said.

"What?! Why?" Junior asked.

"Well... This is getting more dangerous" Dwayne said. "I mean, you were seven miles underground, and I fell off a train. I think it's time to call it quits sport"

"Dad, I really think that we can do this" Junior said.

"Gee, I don't know" Dwayne said. "I don't want either of us to get hurt"

"How about this?" Junior asked. "If this next challenge is more dangerous than the train in India we'll drop out?"

"Okay, sure" Dwayne said. "It's a deal"

"Thanks dad" Junior said.

Meanwhile, the Goths are in their cab.

"I Argentina is less hot than this" Ennui said.

"Same, I want our make up to not melt off again" Crimson said.

"Agreed" Ennui said.

Loki sticks his head out of Ennui's shirt.

"You know, is it legal to take an animal out of another country with out asking?" Crimson asked.

"I'm sure it's nothing to worry about" Ennui said.

Meanwhile, in the Sisters' taxi.

"Emma, I am glad that you aren't super distracted by Noah anymore" Kitty said.

"Thank you" Emma said.

"But... You're starting to go back to your ultra-competitive roots" Kitty said.

"Which is good" Emma said. "After all, we want to win"

"Yes... Just try and tone it down a bit" Kitty said.

"I make no promises but I'll do my best" Emma said.

Meanwhile, in the Ice Dancers' cab.

"Okay. We are going to go after the Goths this time" Josee said.

"Why?" Jacques asked.

"Because it was a complete failure when we went after the Sisters" Josee said.

"But how do you suggest we do that?" Jacques asked

Josee whispers something to her partner.

"Ooh, I love it Josee" Jacques said.

Jacques claps very quickly.

"Don't clap like that" Josee said. "It makes you look like a woman"

Cut to a plane up in the air.

"All the teams are on their way to Buenos Aires now" Don narrated. "It'll take a while. So they'd better relax until then"

Josee and Jacques are watching the Goths from across the aisle.

"Just wait" Josee said. "They'll do it eventually"

"Do what?" Jacques asked.

"You'll know it when you see it" Josee said.

The camera pans over to the Goths.

"Hmm... Sure is a long flight" Ennui said.

"Yeah..." Crimson said. "Probably another three hours at least. I'm going to nap"

"I need to use the washroom" Ennui said. "Keep an eye Loki"

"Okay..." Crimson said sleepily.

Crimson reclines her air plane chair and closes her eyes. Ennui takes Loki out of his shirt and places him on top of Crimson's chest. Loki crawls into Crimson's shirt. Ennui gets up and starts to walk towards the plane bathroom. While he's up Josee walks across the aisle to where Crimson and Loki are.

"Hello little bunny..." Josee said quietly.

Josee grabs Loki and takes him back to Jacques.

"Are you sure this will work?" Jacques asked. "We already tried this"

"Oh don't worry. I'm taking it a step further" Josee said. "You'll see once we get to Buenos Aires"

The camera pans back to Dwayne and Junior.

"Are you sure everything is going to be okay?" Dwayne said. "After that last challenge I don't know what to expect"

"Dad, I am going to be fine" Junior said. "I've had a lot of fun here"

"Okay..." Dwayne said. "But as your father I am going to be overprotective of you"

"Just don't embarrass me" Junior said.

"I can't guarantee anything but I'll try" Dwayne said.

The camera pans back to Rock and Spud.

"Whoa, I can't believe Tom and Jen are gone" Spud said.

"Yeah man, it's gonna be weird with out them around" Rock said.

"It's all like... Just like... Whoa man" Spud said.

"Couldn't have said it better myself, man" Rock said.

Cut to the plane landing in Buenos Aires and the teams getting off.

"I see the Don Box!" Emma exclaimed.

Emma and Kitty run over to the Don Box outside the airport. Kitty takes a travel tip.

"It's an All-In" Kitty said. "Tango Takedown?"

Cut to Don inside of a dance studio. An Argentinian Man and an Argentinian woman are tango dancing in the background

"In this challenge teams must head here: The National Academy of Tango" Don said. "Teams must learn and then perform the tango. One misstep and they have to start over. If they get a thumbs up from this local dance instructor, whose name I never learned, and it's another cab ride to..."

Cut to Don at a ranch next to a Don Box. The Don Box is wearing a poncho and a cowboy hat.

"This ranch" Don said. "Where they'll find the next Don Box and their next travel tip... Okay, I don't know why but I just love that outfit on the Don Box. Whoever is in costumes give them a raise"

Cut to the airport where the Sisters, Rockers, Goths, and Father & Son are getting into their cabs. The Ice Dancers aren't even bothering to call a taxi

"Josee, what are we doing?" Jacques asked. "This next challenge is a dance challenge. We're ice dancers. We need to hurry"

"Just one second..." Josee said.

Once the Goths' cab is far away Josee takes Loki out of her vest. Josee walks over to a bench outside the airport and places Loki down.

"Bye little guy" Josee said.

"That's it? We just leave them here?" Jacques asked.

"If they don't know where their precious Loki is. It'll take longer for them to finish the challenge" Josee said.

"I love it when you get evil Josee" Jacques said. "Now let's call a cab"

"Taxi!" Josee yelled.

A taxi pulls up to them.

"Drive as fast as you can" Josee said.

Cut to the other teams arriving at the dance studio in their cabs.

"Cool, we made it" Rock said.

"Sweet" Spud said.

"Huh, I wonder where the Ice Dancers went" Emma said.

The Ice Dancers' taxi suddenly crashes into a lamp post.

"Whoa!" Kitty exclaimed.

"Cool" Crimson said.

All the teams enter the dance studio.

"Is this going to work?" Junior asked. "You're a lot taller than me"

"Your dance instructor was about the same height as me" Dwayne said.

 **Team Interview**

"Dad tried, and failed, to get me into dancing" Junior said. "I can't even remember which dance you signed me up for"

"I think it was all of them..." Dwayne said.

"That would explain a few things" Junior said.

 **Second Interview**

"Kitty and I will be fine" Emma said. "We used to dance together all the time when we were kids"

"And to help Emma get ready for prom" Kitty said. "Which worked out because when no boys asked her we went together"

"Kitty!" Emma said angrily.

"Oops..." Kitty said.

 **End Interview**

Emma and Kitty are getting ready to start dancing.

"Are you ready Em?" Kitty asked.

"Yes I am" Emma said.

"Here we go" Kitty said.

Emma and Kitty start dancing but Kitty steps on Emma's toes.

"Ow!" Emma exclaimed.

The dance instructor gives them a thumbs down. The Sisters exit and the Ice Dancers go up on the dance floor next.

"Prepare to blown away" Jacques said.

Josee and Jacques start dancing.

While they're dancing the camera pans over to Crimson and Ennui.

"Hey, you should take Loki out" Ennui said. "We don't want him to get hurt while dancing"

"Good idea" Crimson said.

Crimson reaches into her shirt.

"What the- Where's Loki?" Crimson said.

"He's gone?" Ennui asked.

"We must have left him at the airport" Ennui said. "That's the last place we were where he could have escaped.

"Come on, let's go find him" Crimson said.

Crimson and Ennui leave the dance studio.

The camera pans to the Ice Dancers finishing their dance. The dance instructor claps.

"Show offs" Emma said.

"We'll be going" Jacques said.

"Good luck catching up" Josee said.

Josee and Jacques exit the studio.

 **Team Interview**

"This isn't fair" Rock said. "Why is there a dancing challenge when one of the teams is dancers!"

"Well, we did have a guitar challenge a while ago" Spud said.

"Oh yeah, that is fair" Rock said.

 **End Interview**

Rock and Spud are getting ready to dance.

"You ready?" Rock asked.

"Not really" Spud said.

"Well too bad" Rock said.

Rock and spud start dancing the tango.

"Do you have any idea what we're doing?" Rock asked.

"I know that I'm supposed to twirl you" Spud said.

"Good, do that" Rock said.

"Okay" Spud said.

Spud twirls Rock. But this just spins him out of control and causes Rock to smash into the dance instructor. The dance instruct gives them a very weak thumbs down.

"Sorry..." Spud said

Dwayne and Junior step on to the dance floor.

"Okay, you ready sport?" Dwayne asked.

"Sure. How hard could his be?" Junior asked.

Junior and Dwayne start tango dancing. Dwayne slips on the ground and falls over backwards.

The instructor gives them a thumbs down.

Meanwhile, Crimson and Ennui make it back to the airport.

"Where is he?" Ennui said.

"He has to be around here somewhere" Crimson said.

Crimson and Ennui go inside the airport.

"Are you sure he's in here?" Ennui asked.

"It's the most likely place" Crimson said.

"Let's check the lost and found" Ennui said.

 **Team Interview**

"I can't believe this happened again" Crimson said.

"We need to keep a closer eye on Loki" Ennui said.

 **End Interview**

At the dance studio Emma and Kitty finish dancing. The instructor gives them a thumbs up.

"Yes!" Emma cheered.

"Can you take a picture with us?" Kitty asked the dance instructor.

"No time Kitty" Emma said.

Emma and Kitty leave the dance studio. Dwayne and Junior step back up on the dance floor.

"All right, let's try this again" Dwayne said.

Back at the airport, Crimson and Ennui are in the lost and found office. Crimson rings a bell on the desk. A man walks over to the desk.

"Hi. Do you speak English?" Ennui asked.

"Yes" The man said. "How may I help you?"

"Do you have a rabbit back there?" Crimson asked.

"What?" The man asked.

"It's wearing makeup" Ennui added.

"I'm sorry. We don't have it" The man said.

"Are you sure?" Crimson asked.

"If we had a rabbit with makeup we would know" The man said.

"Okay..." Crimson said.

"Bye or whatever" Ennui said.

Back at the studio, Dwayne and Junior finish dancing. The dance instructor gives them a thumbs up.

"Thanks" Junior said.

"Let's go!" Dwayne said.

Dwayne and Junior leave the studio.

"Just us left..." Rock said.

"Aw... We were doing well" Spud said.

"Wait, the Goths left" Rock said.

"All right, we can still do this!" Spud exclaimed.

Meanwhile, at the ranch, Josee and Jacques arrive. They run up to the Don Box and take a travel tip.

"It's a Botch-Or-Watch" Jacques read. "It says we have to... Ride a horse? That's not so bad"

Cut to Don standing next to a horse.

"In this Botch-Or-Watch whoever didn't do the Arctic ring toss has to ride a horse" Don said. "And use a traditional boleadora to tie up their teams' designated emu"

A flock of emus with the pictures of the final five teams on them run by Don.

"Once they tie up their emu they must take it by taxi to the Chill Zone" Don said.

Cut to Don at the Chill Zone which is located at the top of a mountain.

"Located here" Don said. "Atop Mount Acuncagua in the Andes. But they'd better hurry. Because as always, the last team to arrive may be heading home"

"Hey Don" The cameraman said. "Don't emus only live in Australia?"

"I don't come up with challenges I just host this" Don said. "If you've got complaints take it up with Gary the head writer"

Back at the ranch, Jacques is sneaking up on an emu with a picture of the Sisters on it while holding a bottle of vegetable oil. He squirts the vegetable oil on the emu. This causes the emu to run away.

"Ha! Now I've taken care of the Goths and the Sisters!" Jacques said.

Josee walks over to him.

"What are you doing?" Josee asked.

"Just taking care of the competition" Jacques said.

"Great work Jacques" Josee said. "Just one question: Where did you get that vegetable oil?"

"I've always had it" Jacques said. "I just never bothered to use it until now"

"Um... Okay then" Josee said.

Back in the studio, Rock and Spud are dancing the tango.

"Okay, try the twirl again" Rock said.

"You got it" Spud said.

Spud twirls rock and then catches him in a dip. The instructor gives them the thumbs up.

"Woohoo! Let's do this" Spud said.

Rock and Spud exit the building.

At the Ranch, the Father & Son, and the Sisters arrive. Emma and Kitty make it to the Don Box first. Emma takes a travel tip.

"It's a Botch-Or-Watch" Emma read. "And it's your turn"

"Which emu is ours?" Kitty asked.

Kitty and Emma notice that their emu looks suspiciously oily.

"There it is" Emma said. "Um... Is it just me or is it a little bit... Oily"

Emma and Kitty hear the Ice Dancers laughing in the distance.

"We should have known" Emma said.

"What makes you think it was us?" Josee asked.

"Yes, come back when you have some proof" Jacques asked.

All the oil Jacques is covered in causes him to slip off of his horse.

"Uh huh..." Emma said suspiciously.

"That evidence is circumstantial lawyer girl" Josee said.

"There's going to be plenty of karma coming your way" Jacques said.

 **Team Interview**

Kitty is writing something down on her smartphone.

"What are you doing?" Emma asked.

"Dear karma... I found two people you seemed to have missed" Kitty read. "Check your record books and please correct this at your earliest convenience"

 **End Interview**

Junior takes the travel tip.

"You good at horseback riding?" Junior asked.

"Did you see how terribly I did on that mechanical bull?" Dwayne asked. "Imagine how I would do on a real one?!"

"That's not good. And how do you feel about emus?" Junior asked.

"Never been around them before" Dwayne said. "This should be... Interesting."

Meanwhile, Crimson and Ennui are on their way back to the dance studio in a taxi.

"I guess we have to accept that Loki is gone forever..." Crimson said.

"Yeah... I guess..." Ennui said, sounding sadder than usual.

Crimson notices Ennui's makeup is smudged.

"Are you crying?" Crimson asked. "Your makeup looks a little smudged"

"No..." Ennui lied. "Your make up is smudged too"

"That's because there was something in my eye and I rubbed it..." Crimson said. "Who am I kidding... I was crying... And so were you"

"Okay... Fine..." Ennui said. "I'm just going to... Miss Loki"

"Um... Not to intrude, but we're at the dance studio" The driver said.

"Thanks..." Crimson said.

Crimson and Ennui exit the taxi. On the stairway to the door Loki is on the steps.

"Loki?" Ennui said seeming confused.

Loki hops over to the Goths.

"He must have known we were going here" Crimson said.

"I'm so glad we could find him" Ennui said.

Ennui picks Loki up. Crimson and Ennui actually smile.

"I'm so glad we found Loki" Crimson said.

"It hurts to smile..." Ennui said.

"Agreed" Crimson said. "Let's get in there and do that dance"

Back at the ranch Rock and Spud arrive. Rock takes a travel tip from the Don Box.

"Cool" Rock said. "It's a Botch-Or-Watch"

"Uh oh, doesn't this mean I have to ride the horse?" Spud asked.

"Do you think you can do it?" Rock asked.

"Um... Probably" Spud said.

"Good enough for me" Rock said.

Spud hops onto a horse.

"High ho Silver away!" Spud cheered.

The horse does nothing.

"Mush? Giddyup? Anything?" Spud said.

The horse remains still.

The camera moves to Kitty chasing after her teams' emu. She throws her boleadora at the emu. It wraps around the emu but quickly slides off due to the oil.

"This might be a tough one" Kitty said.

The camera pans over to Dwayne chasing an emu. Dwayne is barely able to hang on to his horse.

"Easy there" Dwayne said.

Dwayne throws his boleadora at the emu but it misses completely.

"Horse! Please stop!" Dwayne said. "I need to grab my things"

The horse comes to an abrupt stop and Dwayne is throws from its back and into a tree.

"This isn't what I meant..." Dwayne said weakly.

Back at the dance studio Crimson and Ennui finish their dance. The dance instructor gives them a thumbs up.

"Thanks or whatever" Ennui said.

"Yeah" Crimson said.

Crimson and Ennui exit the dance studio.

 **Team Interview**

"Today has been crazy" Ennui said.

"I don't really care if we catch up" Crimson said.

"Same" Ennui said.

 **End Interview**

Back on the ranch, Kitty is still chasing after her teams' emu. She throws her boleadora at the emu but it just slides off.

"Aw man" Kitty said.

The camera pans to Jacques on his teams' horse. He is having trouble holding on due to the fact that some of the vegetable oil got on him.

"This is so slippery!" Jacques exclaimed.

He slips off the back on the horse and only manages to hold on to its tail.

"Must. Hold. On!" Jacques said.

He slips off the trail of the horse and falls tot he ground.

Meanwhile, Rock and Spud are trying to get their stubborn horse to move.

"Come on... Please move" Rock said.

"We'll give you a sugar cube... Horses like that... Right?" Spud asked.

The horse just sits down.

"Well this is just even worse" Rock said.

The camera pans to Dwayne still trying to cling on to his horse with out falling off.

"Can you slow down a bit!" Dwayne yelled at his horse.

The horse comes to a sudden stop and Dwayne is throws from his horse. He ends up landing in the bushes.

"I am not okay..." Dwayne said weakly.

Junior runs over to his father.

"Dad! Are you going to be able to do this?" Junior asked.

"I have to" Dwayne said. "It's what the card said"

"Is anything broken?" Junior asked.

"No... Not yet" Dwayne said.

"Than get back up there" Junior said. "You can do it"

Dwayne gets up from the ground.

"Thanks son" Dwayne said. "I'll just try again"

At the Don Box Crimson and Ennui arrive. Crimson takes a travel tip.

"Cool" Crimson said. "I get to ride horses. And not fake ones like in Alberta"

"Sounds super cool" Ennui said.

 **Team Interview**

"My grandmother used to teach my how to ride horses whenever I went over to her farm for the summer" Crimson said. "This challenge should be easy"

 **End Interview**

Kitty is chasing after her teams' emu. She throws her boleadora at the emu but it just ducks.

"Damn it! It happened again!" Kitty exclaimed.

The camera pans to Jacques chasing after his emu.

"Oh! I have you now!" Jacques exclaimed.

The oil causes Jacques' boleadora to slip out of his hands and wrap around his face. He falls off of his horse.

"Ugh! Stupid oil!" Jacques yelled.

Josee facepalms.

Meanwhile, Spud is trying to get his horse off the ground.

"Up! Please!" Spud said.

The horse doesn't move.

"Fine, we'll do this the hard way" Spud said.

Spud tries to push the horse but it doesn't budge.

Meanwhile, Ennui is helping Crimson up onto her horse.

"Good luck or whatever" Ennui said.

"This should be easy" Crimson said. "My grandmother told me how to do this. Just with baby cows instead of emus and lassos instead of boleadoras"

Crimson rides away on her horse.

Back with Rock and Spud, they are trying to get their horse off the ground still.

"Any luck yet?" Rock asked.

"No" Spud said.

"Maybe it needs motivation" Rock said.

"Do you think horses like Choco-Oinks?" Spud asked.

"Maybe... But you ate them all in India" Rock said.

"You know what, I don't need this horse" Spud said. "I can catch that emu on my own"

"Is that against the rules?" Rock asked.

"I don't know and I don't care" Spud said.

Meanwhile, Jacques is trying to get the oil off of his shirt and seems to be failing.

"My shirt refuses to absorb the oil!" Jacques exclaimed. "It's polyesters only downfall!"

 **Team Interview**

"Polyester is the only fabric that moves as beautifully as we do" Jacques said.

"Have you ever tried ice dancing wearing cotton? Of course you haven't because it'd be impossible" Josee said.

 **End Interview**

Kitty is talking to Emma from her horse.

"The boleadora won't stay on the emu because of the oil" Kitty said.

"Well you'll just have to keep trying" Emma said.

"Okay" Kitty said.

Kitty throws the boleadora at the emu. It wraps around the emu but falls off because of the grease.

"That is it!" Kitty yelled.

Kitty gets off her horse and angrily starts running at the emu. Kitty grabs on to the emu but the grease makes the emu slide across the ground. They both slide down a hill.

"Kitty!" Emma exclaimed.

Meanwhile, Dwayne is chasing after the emu.

"I've got you now you now you wannabe ostrich!" Dwayne exclaimed.

Dwayne throws his boleadora at the emu but it misses again.

"Dang it!" Dwayne exclaimed. "I'm not falling for your tricks again horse!"

Dwayne drops off of his horse.

"Ha! I out smarted you" Dwayne said.

Dwayne walks over to where he dropped his bolreadora and picks it up.

"Back to the drawing board I guess" Dwayne said.

Dwayne's emu sees him and starts chasing after him

"Bad emu! Very bad emu!" Dwayne shouted as he ran away.

 **Team Interview**

"I think it wanted to mate with me" Dwayne said.

"Okay... I did not need to know that" Junior said.

"You're right" Dwayne said. "I hope they edit this out"

"I doubt they will" Junior said.

 **End Interview**

Jacques is still trying to wipe his hand off on his shirt.

"Why won't you absorb!" Jacques exclaimed. "There has to be something I can use!"

Jacques looks up at his hair.

"I know I'm going to regret this..." Jacques said. "But I must make a sacrifice!"

Jacques runs his hands through his hair and the oil absorbs into it.

"My hands are dry..." Jacques said.

 **Team Interview**

"I can't believe you sacrificed your hair" Josee said.

"I don't want to talk about it" Jacques said.

 **End Interview**

Jacques is up on his horse. He sees his emu in the distance and throws the boleadora at it. It ties up the emu.

"Yes!" Jacques cheered.

Jacques gets off his horse. Josee comes running up to him and hugs Jacques.

"You're my hero! You're everyone's hero!" Josee cheered.

Jose slips off of Jacques because of the oil.

Meanwhile, Spud is watching his emu from a distance.

"I'll show that horse who's boss" Spud said. "I don't need them"

Spud throws his boleadora and it wraps around the emu.

"Yeah!" Spud cheererd.

 **Team Interview**

"Take that horse!" Spud cheered.

 **End Interview**

Crimson has her eye on an emu.

"I need to make sure my aim is perfect" Crimson said.

She throws her boleadora but the emu ducks and it misses.

 **Team Interview**

"So I'm not used to using this thing yet" Crimson said. "But I still have more horse riding experience than the other teams"

"Whatever. I don't care if we win or not" Ennui said.

"Me too" Crimson said.

 **End Interview**

Two taxis pull up to the Ice Dancers and Rockers. They are carrying their emus with them. Jacques jumps into the cab but the oil causes him to slide across the seat and out the other door.

"I'm okay..." Jacques said.

"I'll get the bird in" Josee said.

Josee puts the emu in the taxi but it also slides out of the taxi and on top of Jacques.

"I'm still okay..." Jacques said weakly.

"Do you have a seat cover?" Josee asked the driver.

Meanwhile, Kitty is still sliding down the hill on top of her emu. Kitty takes a picture of her and the emu with her phone.

"That was worth it!" Kitty exclaimed.

Kitty and the emu come to the bottom of the hill and crash into a tree.

"Yes! Stuck the landing!" Kitty cheered.

 **Team Interview**

"So what if I snapped a selfie? When am I ever going to get a chance to ride down a hill with a emu again?" Kitty asked.

Emma glares at her.

"Hopefully never..." Kitty said.

 **End Interview**

"Phew, we both survived" Kitty said to the emu. "No we just have to get you back up top"

Emma slides down the hill and down to where Kitty is.

"Look out!" Emma exclaimed.

Emma crashes into the emu.

"Emma!" Kitty exclaimed. "What are you doing down here?"

"I just saw my little sister fall down a mountain and I was worried" Emma said. "Are you okay?"

"Don't worry Emma. I'm okay" Kitty said. "... Wanna help me carry the emu?"

"Ew, no. It smells like expired cheese" Emma said.

The emu gets up and growls at the Sisters.

"Uh oh. I think it's mad" Kitty said.

"I was just stating a fact" Emma said.

Emma and Kitty start running up the hill to get away from the emu.

Meanwhile, Crimson is chasing after her teams' emu on her horse.

"Almost there" Crimson said.

Crimson throws her boleadora at the emu and it is wrapped up.

"And done" Crimson said.

Ennui walks over to Crimson.

"Nice work. I'll go call a cab" Ennui said.

The camera pans over to Dwayne who is still running from his emu.

"Please don't hurt me emu!" Dwayne yelled. "I have a wife and a son"

The emu chasing Dwayne towards a tree and Dwayne climbs up it.

"Junior! Help!" Dwayne yelled.

"I'll save you dad!" Junior exclaimed.

Junior runs towards his father but is chased up the tree by the emu.

"Well... I tried" Junior said.

"It was worth a shot" Dwayne said.

Meanwhile at the Chill Zone the Rockers and Ice Dancers are racing towards Don.

"Out of the way you punk rock wannabes!" Josee yelled.

"I thought we were friends or something" Spud asked.

"Ha! You think that we trusted you?" Jacques said.

The Rockers and Ice Dancers get closer to the Chill Zone.

"Hold it right there!" Don said. "You're both getting penalties"

"For what?!" Josee asked angrily.

"Yeah man, what did we do?" Spud asked.

"Rock, Spud, you were supposed to be on your horse when you caught the emu" Don said. "Ten minute penalty"

"Aw man, that sucks" Rock said.

"I feel you man" Spud said.

"Josee, Jacques, you have been caught for sabotage" Don said. "Twenty minute penalty"

"And what evidence do you have?" Jacques asked.

"I can see the vegetable oil in your hair" Don said.

"Damn it!" Jacques exclaimed.

Back at the ranch, Emma and Kitty are chased to the top of the hill by the emu.

"I did not know emus were so terrifying!" Kitty shouted.

"Same here Kitt" Emma said.

Emma and Kitty are chased up the same tree that Dwayne and Junior are in.

"Oh hey guys" Dwayne said.

"Did your emu try to mate with you too?" Junior asked.

"What?" Emma asked.

"Just don't ask" Junior said. "It's kind of... Weird"

"Emma! I have an idea" Kitty said. "Take this"

Kitty hands her boleadora over to her sister.

"What are you doing?" Emma asked.

"Helping my big sister pay for law school" Kitty said.

Kitty jumps down from the tree and holds on to the emu. Emma climbs down and gets on the horse. She throws the boleadora at the emu and it wraps around the emu and Kitty.

"You okay?" Emma asked.

"I'm good" Kitty said. "Let's go!"

Emma runs off leading the emu attached to Kitty behind her.

"Uh oh, we should probably do something" Dwayne said.

"I'll distract it, you grab it" Junior said.

"Got it" Dwayne said.

Junior jumps down from the tree. The emu starts chasing him. Dwayne gets down from the tree and on to his horse. He throws his boleadora and it wraps around the emu.

"Way to go dad!" Junior exclaimed.

"Let's get to the cab" Dwayne said.

Dwayne and Junior run up to the road where the Sisters already are.

"Taxi!" Dwayne and Emma yelled.

A taxi pulls up to them.

Meanwhile at the Chill Zone the Ice Dancers and Rockers are waiting for their penalty to be up.

"Is it like, over yet" Spud asked.

"Soon" Don said.

"What about us?" Josee asked.

"Less soon" Don said.

Crimson and Ennui arrive at the Chill Zone walk up to Don.

"And the Goths take first!" Don announced.

"Whatever" Ennui said.

"Yeah, we don't care" Crimson said. "About anything"

"We have footage of you crying" Don said.

"I don't recall that" Ennui said.

"Me neither" Crimson said.

"Whatever" Don said. "Rock, Spud, your time is up. You get second"

Rock and Spud step on to the Carpet of Completion.

"Sweet" Rock said.

"How much longer for us?" Josee asked.

"Don't you worry" Don said.

Meanwhile, inside Emma and Kitty's taxi.

"You holding up okay Kitt?" Emma asked.

"Well the emu hasn't pecked me in a while so that's good" Kitty said.

Emma looks out the window and sees Dwayne and Junior's taxi catching up.

"Driver speed up!" Emma exclaimed.

Meanwhile, Dwayne and Junior's emu is thrashing around inside their taxi in an attempt to escape.

"Who knew emus were so violent!" Dwayne exclaimed.

"I think I swallowed a feather!" Junior yelled.

Dwayne looks out the window and sees that they have caught up with the Sisters.

"Good news sport" Dwayne said. "We still might be able to win this"

At the Chill Zone the Ice Dancers are still waiting for the penalty to end.

"Is our time up!?" Josee asked angrily.

"Wait for it, wait for it... Now!" Don said. "Your time is up"

Josee and Jacques step into the Chill Zone.

"Third place!" Don announced.

"Bronze is better than gone" Josee said.

"Ooh, I like that" Jacques said.

"Thank you" Josee said.

The taxis of the Sisters and Father & Son park near the Chill Zone. Both teams get out of the cabs and start running towards Don.

"It's gonna be a close one folks" Don said.

Emma and Kitty make it to the Chill Zone first.

"Forth!" Don announced.

Dwayne and Junior make it to the Chill Zone after them.

"Dwayne Senior, Dwayne Junior, I'm sorry, but your time on the Ridonculous Race is up" Don said.

"Aw dang it" Dwayne said.

"It's fine dad. I had a good time" Junior said.

Footage of Dwayne and Junior competing plays while they talk over it.

"Aw shoot, I'm sorry we didn't win Junior" Dwayne said over a clip of him attempting to pull his camel through the Moroccan desert played.

"It's cool dad. I actually had a lot of fun" Junior said over a clip of of throwing rings at the narwhals in the Arctic.

"Yeah, I'm glad I got to get closer to my son" Dwayne said as footage of him riding the mechanical bull in Alberta was shown.

"Too bad you got that tattoo" Junior said as the footage switched to them walking away.

"I'm going to grow a beard" Dwayne said.

"Please don't" Junior said.

"In that case I guess I could take some money from your college fund" Dwayne said.

"Nope! Beard is fine" Junior said.

* * *

 **I did check and that cameraman is right. Emus (To my knowledge) only live in Australia. I just kept them in because I didn't know what to replace them with... I promise to be less lazy in the future. As for the elimination, I didn't know what else to Dwayne and Junior. And they were starting to overstay their welcome. Like with all the teams I'm eliminating at this point I like them, but it's their time to go. Let me know what you think.**


	25. Bahamarama

"Previously, on the Ridonculous Race! The final five hit Argentina. The Sisters and Goths were targeted but both of them ended up staying in the race. Much to the frustration of the Ice Dancers. In the end Dwayne and Junior ended up being the team that went home. The Ice Dancers, the Sisters, the Goths, the Rockers. These final four teams have battled in twenty four countries and crossed one hundred and eleven time zones so far. From this moment on, it's a non-stop race to the finish line. Teams that slow down will get left behind. Welcome to part one, of the grand finale, of: The Ridonculous Race!"

Don is near the Don Box in Argentina.

"We're back in Argentina" Don said. "Where yesterdays winners are about to grab the first travel tip"

Crimson and Ennui walk over to the Don Box.

 **Team Interview**

"So... Final Four" Ennui said. "That sure is... Something"

"I can barely contain my excitement" Crimson said unemotionally.

"You're practically a fountain of joy" Ennui said.

 **Second Interview**

"Obviously we're going to win" Josee said. "Do you know how many times we've taken the gold in this race?"

"There's no way the others can compete with us" Jacques said. "It's laughable"

"Nobody can stop us" Josee said.

"The Goths and Rockers are weak and we aren't concerned about the Sisters" Jacques said.

"What is Emma gonna do? Lawyer me into elimination?" Josee jokingly asked.

Jacques and Josee laugh evilly.

 **End Interview**

Ennui takes a travel tip.

"Hmm... We're going to the Bahamas" Ennui read.

"I hate sunny places" Crimson said.

Cut to a background of the Bahamian flag with a postcard that depicts the beach to accompany it.

"The Bahamas, known for its pirate history, stunning beaches, and florescent pink flamingos" Don narrated.

Cut to Don at an airport in the Bahamas.

"Once teams land in Nassau they will find their next Don Box here" Don said.

Don walks up to a Don Box that is wearing an eyepatch.

"You know what, I semi-approve of this Don Box" Don said.

Back in Argentina the four teams get into their taxis.

Cut to the inside of the Rockers' cab.

"Whoa man, I can't believe we're in the final four" Spud said.

"I know, it's like just... KABOOM! Mind blowing" Rock said.

"That is totally the sound of my mind being blown" Spud said.

Meanwhile, inside Crimson and Ennui's taxi.

"I really didn't think about what we'd do with the million if we got it" Ennui said.

"I'd buy more umbrellas" Crimson said. "I burn easily. You can't tell because of all the makeup"

"That'd a good investment" Ennui said.

"Thank you" Crimson said.

Meanwhile, at the airport. The clerk at the desk is painting a figurine of a monster.

"Almost done..." The clerk said. "I have to be very careful"

Josee and Jacques run up to the clerk.

"Hey!" Josee exclaimed.

The sudden noise causes the clerk to drop his figurine.

"Two tickets to Nassau!" Josee ordered. "Now!"

"Y-yes ma'am" The clerk said.

The other teams enter the airport.

"Um... Did we walk in on something?" Emma asked.

"You all going to Nassau too?" The clerk asked. "Please don't hurt me"

Later the plane is up in the air.

"All four teams are on their flight to Nassau" Don narrated. "But thanks to the magic of editing, I can change "On their way" to "arriving at". I sure love computers"

Cut to the plane landing in Nassau. All the teams get off the flight and run over to the Don Box outside the airport. Rock and Spud make it to the Don Box first. Rock takes a travel tip.

"It's an All-In" Rock read from the travel tip. "Arr matey this way be treasure maps... What does that mean?"

"No clue man" Spud said. "Is it in another language?"

"Maybe" Rock said.

Cut to Don standing outside of a building with a pirate flag on it.

"Welcome to Nassau's Pirate Museum" Don said. "Teams must travel here by cab"

Cut to Don inside the museum in a room full of maps.

"And then search this grand display of petty theft for one of these" Don said.

Don holds a map with a Ridonculous Race logo on it up to the camera.

"A Ridonculous Race treasure map" Don said.

Cut to Don out on a jet ski in the middle of the ocean.

"After that, they must travel by jet ski to Abaco Island" Don explained.

Don parks the jet ski at a floating raft.

"Where they'll find there next Don Box and their tip" Don said.

Back at the airport all the teams have gotten into taxis.

"The Goths have taken the lead" Don said. "Followed by the Rockers, Dancers, and Sisters"

Cut to the inside of of Josee and Jacques' taxi.

"As professional athletes we have the unique ability to stay calm under pressure" Jacques said.

Josee looks out the window and sees the Sisters' cab passing them.

"There go the Sisters" Josee said. "Driver! Please hurry, we're in a race! You need to go faster! You hear me?! Faster!"

The driver ignores them and turns on the radio really loud.

"I'm actually surprised this doesn't happen more often!" Jacques said over the music.

"Me too!" Josee said.

At the Pirate Museum Crimson and Ennui arrive first.

"Cool, a museum about pirates... I like pirates" Ennui said.

"Me too" Crimson said. "I wanted to be one when I was six"

"I wanted to be a mortician when I was six" Ennui said. "That or work in a bakery"

Crimson and Ennui enter the room full of maps.

"Wow... That's a lot of maps" Ennui said.

"I'll take the left half of this room" Crimson said.

"I'll search the right" Ennui said.

The Rockers enter the room.

"Whoa, check out the cool maps" Rock said.

"Ooh! I see a map!" Spud said.

"Spud it has to have a logo on it" Rock said.

"Oh... Never mind" Spud said.

Outside the museum Emma and Kitty get out of their taxi.

"Let's do this Kitt" Emma said.

"Yeah!" Kitty cheered.

Josee and Jacques get out of their taxi and push the Sisters to the ground.

"So long losers!" Josee said.

"You two are the worst!" Kitty exclaimed.

 **Team Interview**

"We're not the worst" Jacques said.

"Of course not" Josee said. "We're just dedicated competitors that will stop at nothing to win and will ruins the lives of anyone who gets in our way"

"That still sounds pretty bad Josee" Jacques said.

"Yeah, but at least I didn't kill a puppy or anything like that" Josee said.

"That is true" Jacques said.

 **Second Confessional**

"Ugh! Those Ice Dancers!" Emma said angrily. "I swear if this keeps up I will never watch the Winter Olympics again!"

"You never watch the Olympics anyway" Kitty said.

"You get the idea" Emma said. "I don't like them"

"True" Kitty said.

 **End Interview**

Emma and Kitty enter the pirate museum.

"We're the last in but we can still be the first out" Emma said. "Come on, let's search"

"You got it" Kitty said.

Emma and Kitty go over to a barrel full of maps and start searching.

The camera pans over to the Ice Dancers looking for the map. Josee picks up a map and unfurls it.

"Damn! No logo" Josee said angrily.

Josee rips the map in half.

"Josee, I think you're going to have to pay for that" Jacques said.

"Well that just makes me madder!" Josee said.

The camera pans over to the Goths.

"Hmm... Where's the map" Crimson said.

Ennui looks behind a framed map and pulls another map out. He unrolls the map and sees the Ridonculous Race logo.

"Cool" Ennui said.

"Let's get out of here, Ennui" Crimson said.

Crimson and Ennui leave the museum.

The camera pans to the Sisters. Emma takes a map out of a basket and looks at it. She notices the Ridonculous Race logo.

"Nice job" Kitty said.

"Let's go" Emma said.

Emma and Kitty leave the museum.

"So long ice dunces!" Kitty said to the Ice Dancers as she left.

 **Team Interview**

"Okay, that felt good" Kitty said.

 **End Interview**

On the beach the Sisters and Goths enter the changing room.

"The Sisters have leaped ahead" Don narrated. "And the Goths maintain their lead"

The two teams exit the changing room and get on their jet skis.

"Two teams have already completed the first challenge" Don said via voice over. "Will the Ice Dancers and the Rockers be able to catch up?"

The Goths and Sisters make it to the raft int he middle of the ocean. Crimson and Kitty take a travel tip from the Don Box.

"It's a Random Botch. Dive to Survive" Kitty said. "Whoever is holding this tip-"

"Phew, that was close" Emma said.

"Emma!" Kitty said angrily.

"Whoever is holding this tip must search for sunken treasure" Crimson said.

Cut to Don underwater with an air tank on his back and a diving helmet on his head. He is standing near the mouth of a cave.

"In this beyond dangerous challenge the Botchers must navigate these underwater tunnels in search of gold doubloons" Don explained. "Armed only with their map, flashlight, and a small tank of oxygen I might add. If they take too long they'll run out of air. And you need that stuff. To not die"

Cut to Don inside the cavern next to a treasure chest.

"Find this big cavern, grab these gold coins, and swim back up to the pier" Don said. "Then they take the jet skis to..."

Cut to Don at the Chill Zone.

"This first mid-point Chill Zone of our grand finale" Don said. "The first three teams stay. The last team may never be able to look at a beach again. Without crying"

 **Team Interview**

"Of all the Botches, why do I have get chosen for this one?" Kitty said.

"At my seventh birthday we had a pirate themed pool party" Emma said. "We dove for treasure and Kitty's bikini strap got stuck in the drain"

"I barely got out alive" Kitty said.

"Yeah it was bad" Emma said. "Her top got sucked into the filter, it was a-"

"Emma!" Kitty interrupted.

"What, just stating the facts of the case" Emma said.

 **Second Interview**

"Remind me. Is this makeup water proof, or water resistant?" Crimson asked.

"Water resistant" Ennui said. "The only thing that's probably not going to get washed off is your face. Since you've got a helmet"

"Well crap..." Crimson said.

 **End Interview**

Back at the pirate museum the Ice Dancers and Rockers are still looking for the map.

"Aw man, this is taking forever" Spud said.

"Don't worry man, the important thing is to not give up" Rock said.

Spud looks under a barrel of maps and sees the map with the Ridonculous Race logo.

"Sweet!" Rock said.

Before either of the Rockers can take it, Josee grabs it.

"Hey lady, we found that first" Spud said.

Spud grabs the map and the two of them start pulling it. Rock and Jacques help their teammate with the pulling.

"Let go you Nirvana wannabes!" Josee said.

"Okay" Spud said.

Spud and Rock let go of the map. Josee and Jacques weren't expecting this and they both topple over and let go of the map.

"Oh, thanks for the map guys" Spud said.

Rock grabs the map.

"Let's go Spud!" Rock cheered.

Rock and Spud leave the museum. Josee and Jacques try to move but their joints make a cracking noise.

"Oh! That can not be a good sign" Jacques said.

Cut to outside where the Rockers are getting on their jet skis. Spud gets on the driving side.

"The Rockers have made it up to third place" Don said. "But can they hold it?"

"Have you ever driven one of these?" Rock asked.

"Nope. Have you?" Spud asked.

"No I haven't. Fair point" Rock said.

They leave on their jet ski.

Back inside the Pirate Museum Josee and Jacques are looking for a map. Josee looks at the bottom of a large pile of maps and pulls out one with the Ridonculous Race logo.

"Yes!" Josee cheered.

"Nice work Josee" Jacques said.

Josee and Jacques exit the museum.

"As the Ice Dancer hustle to get out of last place two teams are already starting the second challenge" Don narrated.

Cut to the raft in the ocean. Kitty is already underwater and Emma is communicating with her via headset. Ennui is helping Crimson into her diving gear.

"The Goths are still preparing" Emma said to her sister. "How you doing?"

Cut to Kitty underwater. She is studying her map with her flashlight.

"So far so good. I've got a lot of air" Kitty said. "The tunnel entrance should be..."

Kitty looks up from the map and sees the intimidating entrance to the cave.

"Whoa!" Kitty exclaimed. "I don't think I can do this"

"Of course you can do it" Emma said through the earpiece. "You're the toughest most resourceful person I know. I believe in you Kitty"

"Aw... That is the nicest thing you've ever said to me" Kitty said.

"Great" Emma said. "Now move it! Crimson's coming!"

"And there went your niceness" Kitty said.

"This is serious, Kitty" Emma said

"Right, right, I get it" Kitty said.

Kitty swims into the cave.

Meanwhile out at in the ocean Spud and Rock are driving on their jet ski.

"Come on Spud! Faster!" Rock exclaimed.

"Hey man, I'm going as fast as I can" Spud said.

Rock looks behind him and sees the Ice Dancer gaining on them.

"Uh oh..." Rock said.

Josee and Jacques speed past the Rockers and splash them with water.

"Eat seaweed Rockers!" Josee exclaimed.

"Those guys are jerks" Spud said.

"That's pretty obvious" Rock said.

Over at the raft Josee is taking a travel tip from the Don Box. She looks at her travel tip.

"I h-have to swim in tunnels... And caves!" Josee said nervously.

 **Team Interview**

"I'm not a fan of small spaces" Josee said.

"I think they already knew that" Jacques said.

"What makes you say that?" Josee asked.

"Well..." Jacques began.

Cut to several episodes ago in the Australian prison. Josee is freaking out about being in a small cell.

"It's like there's no air in here!" Josee said nervously.

Cut to Josee suspended over the Siberian Kola Borehole.

"Pull me up!" Josee shouted.

Cut back to the Ice Dancers in the interview area.

"Oh yeah... That" Josee asid.

 **End Interview**

Josee is now wearing her diving gear. Her left eye is twitching.

"You can do this, right?" Jacques said.

"Absolutely... Unless you want to" Josee said. "Please!"

"No, I can't, you know that" Jacques said.

Josee angrily growls at Jacques.

"Yes, that's it, use your anger" Jacques said.

"You're right. I'll channel my anger into sabotaging the other teams" Josee said.

"No more sabotage" Jacques said. "That nearly got us kicked out in India"

"But it didn't. Did it?" Josee said.

"Ugh!" Jacques said. "This is exactly why I don't want to go pro with you anymore"

"What?!" Josee exclaimed.

"There are things I want to do with my life that don't involve sequins and blade sharpeners" Jacques said.

"And you're telling me this now?!" Josee exclaimed.

"We'll talk about it later" Jacques said.

"Ugh! Fine!" Josee said angrily.

Josee dives into the water. After that a large crash noise is heard on the pier.

The camera pans to Rock and Spud's crashed jet ski on the raft.

"I thought you knew how to drive..." Rock said.

"Never said that, man" Spud said.

"Oh... Yeah that's right" Rock said.

Cut to Crimson swimming through an underwater tunnel.

"Three of the four teams are already underwater" Don said. "But only two are in the tunnels"

Cut to outside the tunnels where Josee is curled into a ball and is clutching her map and flashlight.

"Come on Josee. You can do it" Jacques said over the headset. "Just imagine that it's a skating rink. Just dark, and wet and really cramped"

"Stop talking and let me whimper in peace!" Josee yelled.

Josee starts whimpering.

"Get in the tunnel!" Jacques yelled over the headset.

"I don't take orders from traitors!" Josee yelled back.

"You can yell at me after we finish the challenge!" Jacques said over the headset. "The chubbier Rocker is already in the water"

Josee looks up and sees Spud swimming towards her.

"I can't... Breath!" Josee said in a panicked fashion.

"Josee, please keep calm. You have plenty of oxygen" Jacques said.

Josee looks at her oxygen meter.

"It's down to sixty percent!" Josee yelled. " I haven't even been down here that long! Ah!"

Spud swims past Josee and into the tunnel.

"Whoa, Josee's got some real issues" Spud said.

"Clearly" Rock said over the headset. "Be sure to keep focused by the way"

"I will don't worry" Spud said. "As long as I don't see anything too shiny. Shiny things distract me"

Josee screams loudly.

"No! I will not lose this!" Josee yelled.

She cautiously swims into the cave after Spud.

Cut to an electronic map showing the heads of Crimson, Kitty, Spud, and Josee moving through the caves.

"All the botchers are moving through the tunnels" Don narrated. "Some slower than others"

Cut to Josee slowly moving through a tunnel.

"I can't do this! I can't!" Josee yelled.

A small fish swims over to Josee.

"What are you looking at?!" Josee shouted at the fish.

The fish swims away in fear.

"Wake up Josee" Josee said to herself. "You're a winner! And winners never quit"

Cut to the other team members above ground.

"No! I can't do this! No, wait! Yes I can!" Josee yelled over the headset. "Stop being a baby Josee! But I like being a baby! Shut up me!"

"Does she know that we can hear her?" Rock asked.

Emma shrugs.

"Should you try and talk to her?" Ennui asked Jacques.

Jacques puts his hand over the speaking end of the headset.

"I've had to put up with this kind of crap for fourteen years" Jacques said. "It's about time she got a taste of her own medicine"

 **Team Interview**

"Wow, fourteen years of that?!" Kitty said. "I almost feel sorry for him. Almost"

 **Second Interview**

"I'd hate to be Jacques" Crimson said. "Josee is the worst"

"Yeah" Ennui said. "I'm glad I've go you as my partner"

"Wait, did you just compliment me?" Crimson asked.

"Whatever" Ennui said. "I don't care... Or something"

Loki sticks his head out of Ennui's shirt and gives him a weird look.

 **End Interview**

Crimson is swimming around in the tunnels. All of her makeup has washed off of her skin except for the makeup on her face.

"Hey, Ennui, I'm worried I might be leaving a trail behind me" Crimson said.

"Why's that?" Ennui asked.

"I've been leaving a stream of washed off white makeup behind me" Crimson said. "All that's left is my face"

"Whatever" Ennui said. "It's not like anyone will catch up with you... Wherever you are"

"Yeah, that's another thing I'm not so sure about" Crimson said. "This map is pretty vague"

Meanwhile, Kitty is exiting a tunnel and entering a giant open underwater room.

"Emma, I'm in the cavern" Kitty said. "I think I see something gold..."

Kitty shines her flashlight on a treasure chest full of doubloons.

"I found the treasure!" Kitty exclaimed.

"Yes! I know you could do it" Emma said over the headset.

Kitty swims over to the chest and picks up a small bag of doubloons.

"First place all the way" Kitty said.

An angler fish swims over to Kitty.

"Gah!" Kitty exclaimed.

Kitty lets go of her flashlight in fear and the angler fish swallows it. This leaves Kitty in the dark.

"No! No, no, no, no!" Kitty exclaimed.

Kitty grabs the angler fish but it just starts swimming and dragging Kitty behind it.

"Give me back my flashlight!" Kitty yelled.

"Kitt! What is it?" Emma asked through the headset.

"I'm being dragged away by a fish" Kitty explained.

The angler fish drags her into a narrow tunnel.

 **Team Interview**

"What kind fish was that?!" Kitty exclaimed.

"It was an angler fish" Emma said. "It lures its pray in with the light shining from its head"

"What is wrong with the ocean" Kitty said.

 **End Interview**

Meanwhile, Spud is swimming around through a tunnel.

"You holding up okay man?" Rock asked through the headset.

"Yeah, pretty sure I am" Spud said

Spud exits the tunnel and ends up in the giant underwater room with the doubloon chest.

"Aw yeah! I'm in the cavern" Spud said.

He shines his flashlight around the room and he spots the chest of doubloons.

"Do you see them?" Rock asked over the headset.

"Totally, man" Spud said.

Spud takes a small sack of doubloons.

Cut to above the water where the other halves of the teams are.

"All right, time to go back up, Spud" Rock said.

"Hey, Rock, can you as Spud if they've seen Kitty?" Emma asked.

"Yeah, sure thing" Rock said.

Cut back to Spud underwater.

"Spud, have you seen Kitty?" Rock asked through the headset.

"Which one's Kitty?" Spud asked.

"The girl with the pigtails" Rock answered.

"Oh, her" Spud said. "No, I haven't seen her man"

Spud hears Kitty's screaming coming from the narrow tunnel she was dragged into.

"But I think I might hear her" Spud said.

Cut back to above the water.

"Spud says he can hear your sister" Rock said.

"Tell him to follow her" Spud said.

Cut back to underwater.

"Spud, follow the noise" Rock said.

"You got it man" Spud said.

Spud swims into the narrow tunnel Kitty was dragged into.

The camera switches to Kitty being dragged around by the angler fish.

"Where are you Kitty?" Emma asked over the headset.

"A couple of caves over... I think" Kitty said. "And this stupid fish won't let go of my flashlight!"

Kitty swims off camera and a loud metallic clank noise is heard.

"Is everything okay! I heard something!" Emma exclaimed over the headset.

The camera moves over to where Kitty is to reveal that she is stuck between some rocks at the exit of the tunnel. She isn't able to move her hands .

"No I'm not!" Kitty yelled. "I'm stuck down here!"

 **Team Interview**

"This is like Emma's birthday all over again" Kitty said.

"No it's not" Emma said. "If anything, it's much worse"

"You know you need to work on being more supporting" Kitty said.

 **End Interview**

Meanwhile Josee is entering the large open room.

"Jacques, I've made it into the cavern" Josee said. "I am still fearing for my life"

Cut to above the water.

"Good work Josee" Jacques said. "I knew you could do it"

"Crimson, where are you?" Ennui asked.

"Somewhere" Crimson said through the headset.

Cut to Crimson swimming around underwater

"Well try to find it" Ennui said over the headset. "We're kind of behind"

"I'm working on it" Crimson said. "If I die, I want you to know that I keep my will under the mattress in my bedroom"

"You have a will?" Ennui asked.

"I like to be prepared" Crimson said.

"That's good advice" Ennui said.

Loki can be heard chattering something on the other end of the headset.

"Loki says he agrees" Ennnui said over the headset.

Meanwhile, Josee is taking a sack of doubloons from the chest.

"And Josee takes the gold!" Josee cheered to herself. "Like there was any ever doubt"

The oxygen meter on Josee's helmet turns red and starts beeping.

"Gah! My oxygen is down to two percent!" Josee yelled. "No! I need air! Help!"

"Josee, look for an air pocket" Jacques said over the headset.

Josee looks around the caverns. She spots one above her and starts swimming towards the ceiling of the cavern. After swimming up for a bit Josee ends up in an air pocket inside a small enclosed space. Once she feels safe Josee takes her helmet off.

"Okay... I found one..." Josee said, sounding out of breath. "Now what?"

"Um... Don't panic Josee" Jacques said. "I'll think of something"

"Are you telling me you don't know what you're doing!" Josee said.

"I'm doing my best, okay" Jacques said.

Meanwhile, Spud is swimming through the tunnel Kitty is stuck in.

"Do you see Kitty yet?" Rock asked through the headset. "Emma said she got stuck somewhere"

"I'm looking" Spud said.

Spud spots the lower half of Kitty's body sticking out of the rocks.

"I found her" Spud said.

He grabs Kitty's legs and tries to pull her out.

"Ah! What's going on!" Kitty yelled.

"Oh sorry" Spud said. "I'm supposed to help you get out of here"

"Oh thank God" Kitty said.

Spud tries to pull on her legs but Kitty doesn't move.

"Ow! Ow! You're hurting my legs!" Kitty said.

"Okay, don't panic" Spud said. "I have another idea"

Spud tries to move one of the rocks Kitty is wedged between. The rock rubs against Kitty's arm.

"Ah! My arm!" Kitty exclaimed.

"Okay... Let me try something else" Spud said.

"No! Every time you try to help you hurt me" Kitty said. "Give me thirty seconds. I think I have an idea"

"Whatever you say man" Spud said.

 **Team Interview**

"I think I did pretty well" Spud said.

"Eh, I'd give you about an average" Rock said. "Maybe below average"

"I'll take it" Spud said.

 **End Interview**

Meanwhile, Crimson enters the giant cavern with the doubloons.

"Ennui, I think I've found where I'm supposed to go" Crimson said.

"Cool" Ennui said through the headset.

Crimson swims over to the treasure chest and takes a small bag of gold doubloons.

"I have the gold" Crimson said.

"Nice work. I need you to get back here right now. We can still make it to first" Ennui said over the headset. "I think Loki is getting seasick"

"Got it" Crimson said.

Before Crimson leaves she looks up and sees Josee up in the air pocket.

"What the Hell is that?" Crimson asked.

"Josee! You need to get out!" Jacques said through the headset from up in the air pocket.

"I don't have to listen to you anymore!" Josee said. "I'm on my own! Remember!"

"Ennui, I think Josee needs help" Crimson said.

"You should probably go check on her" Ennui said over the headset. "I mean. I usually like death. But not like this"

Cut to Josee talking to Jacques through the headset in the air pocket.

"Listen Josee, we need to send in a diver after you" Jacques said over the headset. "It means you'll be disqualified but it's our only choice"

"You just love to quit. Don't you" Josee said.

"Ugh! Fine! I didn't mean it" Jacques said. "I'll go pro with you"

"Ha! You wish" Josee said.

Crimson swims into the air pocket.

"Hey" Crimson said.

"What are you doing?" Josee asked. "I thought you didn't care about anything?"

"You're right. I don't care" Crimson said. "But even someone as horrible as you doesn't deserve this. And when I saw you stuck in here I actually felt a little... Bad for you"

"Thank you I think" Josee said.

Crimson takes off her helmet and unhooks the breathing mask from the tank.

"We each take turns with this" Crimson said. "Got it?"

"Yes" Josee said.

Josee puts on the oxygen mask. Crimson takes a deep breath in and she and Josee start swimming away. Crimson's wig falls off in the water and her face makeup starts to wash up.

"Crimson and Josee are heading up to the surface" Don said via voice over.

Crimson takes the oxygen mask from Josee. Josee holds he breath to keep from drowning.

"Spud and Kitty are still stuck between a rock... And another rock" Don narrated.

Cut to Kitty still struggling to get out. Spud is trying to push Kitty out.

"Is this working?" Spud asked.

"No, it's not" Kitty said. "Please stop"

"Got it" Spud said. "Sorry"

"Emma, I have an idea" Kitty said into her headset. "I'm going to ditch the oxygen tank and swim for it"

"What no! That's insane" Emma said. "There's now way you can hold your breath long enough. Josee, an actual athlete mind you, had to get help"

"Maybe Josee couldn't hold her breath but I can" Kitty said. "Ever since I was stuck in that pool I've been practising holding my breath. I can go four minutes with out batting an eyelash. I can do this!"

"Please hurry up" Spud said. "I need to get out of here too, man"

"Right" Kitty said.

Kitty takes off her helmet and oxygen tank. This makes enough room for her to swim out. Kitty holds her breath and swims towards the surface.

"Aw man, I came down here for nothing" Spud said.

"Spud, do you think you can get out on your own?" Rock asked over the headset.

"I think so" Spud said.

Spud moves Kitty's scuba gear out of the way and then he moves some of the rocks Kitty was stuck in out of the way.

"All right, I think I can make it" Spud said.

Spud tries to swim out but gets stuck.

"Uh oh" Spud said.

"What?" Rock asked over the headset.

"I may be stuck" Spud said. "Don't worry. I can still use me hands"

Spud pushes against the rocks and frees himself.

"Yes!" Spud cheered. "Let's get out of here"

Meanwhile above the surface, Jacques, Ennui, Emma, and Rock are waiting for their partners. Crimson and Josee make it to the surface. All of Crimson's makeup has washed off now.

"What happened to you?" Ennui asked.

"It's not important" Crimson said.

Crimson takes out her coloured contact lenses.

"Take these. I don't need them anymore" Crimson said.

Ennui takes the lenses from his partner.

"Ready to go now?" Ennui asked.

Loki hops on to the Goths' jet ski.

"Looks like he's ready to go" Crimson said.

Crimson and Ennui get on their jet ski and drive off.

"Josee, are you okay?" Jacques asked. "I was so worried about you?"

"Cram it" Josee said. "Right now we need to focus on winning"

Josee and Jacques get on their jet ski and drive off.

"I might be in trouble" Emma said.

"Same here" Rock said.

Kitty and Spud make it to the surface.

"I made it" Kitty said.

"Oh thank god you're alive" Emma said.

"Way to go man. You made it" Rock said.

"Thanks" Spud said.

"Are we toast?" Kitty asked.

"We can still make it sis" Emma said.

The Rockers and Sisters each get on their jet skis and ride away.

Meanwhile at the Chill Zone the Goths and Ice Dancers have arrived at the beach Don is at. Both teams have changed out of their swimsuits and into their regular clothes. They are racing towards the Chill Zone as fast as they can. Crimson and Ennui seem to be taking the lead.

"Oh no you don't!" Josee said angrily.

Josee picks a coconut off the ground and throws it at the Goths. It hits Ennui in the back of the head. He starts to fall over but tries to grab Crimson for support but he just ends up pulling her to the ground. Josee and Jacques make it to the Chill Zone first.

"First place" Don said. "Also, take this"

Don hands them a travel tip.

"Water taxi to the airport and fly to New York City" Josee read. "Let's go Jacques!"

"Hooray!" Jacques cheered.

Jacques and Josee run over a pier with some water taxis parked at it.

 **Team Interview**

"No penalty this time" Josee said. "How do you feel about my strategy now, Jacques?"

"I never said I didn't like cheating" Jacques said. "I have a problem with getting penalties for it"

"So we're good?" Josee asked.

"Oh yes, we're good" Jacques said.

 **End Interview**

Crimson and Ennui are getting off the ground and brushing the sand on their clothes off.

"Okay, we can still make it" Crimson said.

"Right" Ennui said.

Before they can start moving the Rockers push them out of the way and they fall to the ground.

"Sorry guys! We're in a hurry" Rock said.

"I think I have sand in my eyes" Crimson said.

Rock and Spud reach the Chill Zone.

"Second!" Don announced.

 **Team Interview**

"All right!" Rock cheered. "We're in the final three, man!"

"Wait? We are?!" Spud said, seeming confused. "Awesome! Let's rock that million"

"We could buy ourselves like... A apartment or something like that" Rock said.

"Yeah!" Spud cheered.

Rock and Spud high five.

 **End Interview**

The Sister run past the Goths and make it to the Chill Zone.

"Third place!" Don announced.

"We made it!" Emma exclaimed.

"Yes!" Kitty cheered.

Don hands travel tips to Emma and Rock.

"Cool, we're going to New York" Rock said.

"To the water taxis!" Emma exclaimed.

The Rockers and Sisters run to the water taxis.

"Huh, who are we missing" Don said.

Crimson and Ennui walk over to Don.

"Hi..." Crimson said.

"Oh, right, you two" Don said. "You're out of the race. I wish you luck in whatever circus, metal band, or cult you end up in. Go away"

"I really should be more disappointed... Oddly, I'm not" Ennui said.

"Me too" Crimson said.

Footage of Crimson and Ennui competing plays as they narrate over it.

"I can't believe I'm saying this but... I had a great time here" Crimson said as a clip of them startling Jay and Mickey in the Paris catacombs.

"I'm glad we got to go to Transylvania... And Finland" Ennui said over a clip of him dropping a ring around the narwhals horn in the Arctic.

"I hate those Ice Dancers" Crimson said over a clip of her and Ennui eating the gross food in Iceland.

Loki growls angrily as the footage switches to them walking along the beach.

"You said it Loki" Ennui said.

"You know, I really don't want to put my makeup back on when we get home" Crimson said.

"I feel like taking off my makeup as well" Ennui said.

"Yeah... I think it's time to grow up" Crimson said.

The camera pans to Don at the Chill Zone.

"Three teams remain" Don said. "Who will win it all? The only way to find out is to watch the grand finale of: The Ridonculous Race!"

* * *

 **I can't wait to get around to writing the finale. But I shouldn't get ahead of myself. I had a bit of trouble writing this one, probably because of all the different things going on at once, but I'd say this turned out really well. As for the elimination, I just saw this as a good time to eliminate them. I was pretty much finished with their plot even though I like them. Please let me know what you think of the chapter.**


	26. A Million Ways to Lose a Million Dollars

"Previously, on part one of the Ridonculous Race grand finale! Our final four teams found maps and searched for underwater treasure in the Bahamas. A challenge that for Josee and Kitty, seemed impossible to finish. It was another photo finish at the carpet but the Goths came in last and were cut from the race. And there was no rest for the weary. As the race, raced right on. Find out right here on the amazingly spectacular finale of: The Ridonculous Race!"

Don is on a pier in the Bahamas. Unlike most of the other times. There is no Don Box to be seen.

"Welcome back the the Bahamas" Don said. "Our final three teams have received their travel tips, taken their water taxis, and have boarded a flight to..."

Cut to a background of the American flag with a postcard of the Empire State Building to accompany it.

"New York City!" Don narrated, continuing is previous sentence. "Playground for capitalist wolves and jazz handed Broadway stars alike. It's home to eight point four million people. And sixteen point four million rats!"

Cut to Don standing near a Don Box at an airport in New York City.

"When teams arrive at JFK Airport they must find this Don Box and collect their next tip" Don said.

Cut to a plane up in the air.

"The final three teams are on one last flight here right now" Don said via voice over. "It really is anyone's game"

Cut to the inside of the plane where the Rockers are sitting down in their chairs and talking to the camera.

"Whoa man, it's so crazy that we're in the finale" Spud said.

"I know. There are two ways this could go" Rock said. "It's either ding ding ding! We win. Or, wah, wah, wah, we lose"

"Whoa man, that is the best description of anything ever" Spud said.

"Thanks" Rock said.

The camera pans back to Emma and Kitty.

"Woohoo!" Kitty cheered. "We're going to win a million dollars!"

"This is something you have to take seriously" Emma said. "This isn't a game anymore"

"Emma, keep it together" Kitty said.

"Right, right, I'll keep calm" Emam said. "Just the thought of that million makes me on edge"

The camera pans back to Josee and Jacques talking to the camera.

"We may have won the last challenge but it's not over yet" Josee said.

"At least got rid of those pesky Goths" Jacques said.

"We need to go after the Sister now" Josee said.

"Why not the Rockers? They are so gullible" Jacques asked.

"Exactly. We get rid of Emma and Kitty and then we can take down the Rockers with out breaking a sweat" Josse answered.

"Wonderful idea Josee" Jacques said. "Or... We could get rid of both of them"

"That's the idea you nitwit!" Josee said angrily.

Cut to later where the plane is landing at the airport in New York City.

"The teams have arrived" Don narrated. "Who will take the first tip and the early lead?"

All the teams exit the airport. Emma reaches the Don Box first and takes the travel tip.

"It's an All-In" Emma read. "Who's ready to face the traffic"

Cut to Don standing near some taxis.

"For this All-In teams must take on of these taxis and drive themselves to the Empire State Building" Don explained.

Cut to Don inside the main lobby of the Empire State Building.

"Once they arrive teams must climb a measly eighty six flights of stairs to reach the observation deck" Don explained.

Cut to Don up on the observation deck. On the observation deck is three pedestals with suitcases and travel tips on them.

"Here they collect their next travel tip. And these suitcases" Don said. "Moving one step closer to the final Chill Zone and the one million dollar prize"

Cut back to the teams at the airport reading their travel tip.

"Fun fact: The last team to arrive is pretty much doomed" Emma read from the travel tip.

"That doesn't sound good" Kitty said.

"Yeah, I think that's pretty obvious" Emma said.

"Let's go man!" Rock said.

"Hurry Jacques, this is important!" Josee exclaimed.

All the teams get in their own separate taxi.

Cut to the inside of the Ice Dancer's cab. Jacques is driving and Josee is looking at a map.

"Go! Go! We're in last place!" Josee yelled at her partner.

"You think I don't know that!" Jacques yelled back. "Which way do we go?"

"Keep going straight. But faster" Josee said. "So much faster!"

"Calm down Josee" Jacques said.

"This is as calm as I can be right now!" Josee shouted.

Meanwhile, Emma and Kitty are talking inside of their taxi.

"Okay, we're in the lead now" Kitty said. "I think it's okay for you to be calm now Emma"

"Kitty, I don't think you understand how serious this is right now" Emma said. "If I don't go to law school I'll end up in some boring job"

"Fine, but we're in the lead. I really think falling behind isn't a concern" Kitty said.

"You're right" Emma said. "Thanks"

"No problem" Kitty said.

 **Team Interview**

"Emma has had some issues with being just a little bossy in the past" Kitty said. "But she's really getting better"

"I was never bossy" Emma denied.

"Be honest" Kitty said.

"Fine, maybe a little" Emma said.

 **End Interview**

Meanwhile, Rock and Spud are being more careless with driving their taxi.

"The map says to take the next right" Spud said.

"You got it" Rock said.

Rock spins around the steering wheel and they turn on the street to the right of them. Their taxi knocks over a trash can.

"Oops" Rock said.

 **Team Interview**

"Have we ever driven before?" Rock asked rhetorically. "A little bit... But not much"

"But it was so fun!" Spud said. "Ooh! If we see a fruit stand can we knock it over?"

"That sounds like it borders on illegal" Rock said.

"Yeah, but it sounds fun" Spud said.

"That is true" Rock said.

 **End Interview**

"Take another right" Spud instructed.

Before Rock can respond to his partner he notices Josee and Jacques behind him.

"Hey look, it's the Ice Dancers!" Rock exclaimed.

The Ice Dancers' cab slams into the side of the Rockers' taxi. The causes the Rockers' taxi to drive off the road and crash into a brick wall. Rock and Spud get out of their taxi.

"Aw man, they wrecked out taxi" Rock said.

"Now how do we get to the Empire State Building?" Spud asked.

"Wait, we can still call a regular cab" Rock said.

"How will we find one?" Spud asked.

"This is downtown New York City" Rock said. "It's impossible not to find a cab"

Rock and Spud go over to the street.

"Hey taxi!" Rock exclaimed.

A taxi pulls up to the curb.

"What did I tell you" Rock said.

"Sweet" Spud said.

Rock and Spud get inside the taxi.

"Where are you two goin'?" The driver asked.

"The Empire State Building" Rock said.

Meanwhile, inside the Ice Dancers`taxi

"I see Emma and Kitty ahead of us" Jacques said.

"Get them" Josee said. "Nobody can stop us now"

The camera switches to the inside of Emma and Kitty's taxi.

"We're halfway there" Kitty said. "If we keep going straight we should-"

Kitty is cut off by Josee and Jacques ramming their taxi into the back of theirs. The Ice Dancers do this a second time.

"What is wrong with those people!" Emma exclaimed.

The Ice Dancers back up their taxi and hit the gas pedal. Their taxi rams into the Sisters' taxi a third time. This time it sends the Sisters' taxi spinning out of control and towards a lamp post. The Ice Dancers drive past the Sisters.

 **Team Interview**

"What? We were just having a bit of fun" Josee said.

"And sometimes, that fun involves sabotage" Jacques said.

 **End Interview**

"The Ice Dancers have taken first" Don narrated. "And the Sisters are about to take out most of eighty first and third"

The Sisters' taxi crashes into the lamp post. Emma and Kitty got out of the taxi.

"You okay?" Emma asked.

"Yeah, I'm fine" Kitty said. "But our taxi is ruined. Now what?"

Emma looks around and sees entrance to the subway.

"I see a subway entrance!" Emma exclaimed. "Come on, let's go!"

"Right" Kitty said.

Emma and Kitty run down into the subway.

Meanwhile, inside Josee and Jacques' taxi.

"Did you see the look on their faces?" Josee said. "It was almost as priceless as a million dollars... Almost"

"There's nothing that can stop us now!" Jacques said.

Joee and Jacques laugh evilly.

"Jacques look out!" Josee exclaimed as she pointed to a bunch of cars ahead of her.

Jacques hits the breaks.

"Oh no Josee" Jacques said. "We're in: A New York City traffic jam!"

"No! That can't be!" Josee shouted. "I refuse to accept this!"

"Hey get over yourself and honk like a normal person" The driver in the car next to them said.

The camera pans back to the taxi Rock and Spud are in.

"Aw man, traffic" Spud said. "This is so... Uh, what's the word?"

"Lame?" Rock suggested.

"Something like that" Spud said.

"Hey, I'm doin' the best I can" The driver said. "Hows about we just listen to some music?"

"No way man!" Rock said. "There is a million dollars on the line"

"Whoa, that's a lotta cash" The driver said.

"If we pay you extra would you mind breaking a few driving laws?" Rock asked.

"How much?" The driver asked.

Rock takes a wallet out of his pocket. He looks through the wallet and pulls out a one hundred dollar bill. He hands the driver the bill.

"Hey, is this Canadian money?" The driver said.

"You can get it exchanged" Rock said.

"Yeah, what he said" Spud said

"Hmm... Let me think 'bout it" The driver said.

"I'm sure the other teams are having just as bad a time" Spud said. "At least there's that bright side"

Meanwhile Emma and Kitty are on the subway.

"Wow it surprisingly clean down here" Emma said.

"I know, I thought there would be crocodiles down here" Kitty said.

"One, that's the sewers. Two that's just an urban legend" Emma said.

"Oh, right" Kitty said.

"Next stop, Empire State Building" A voice on the subway speakers said.

"Yes!" Kitty cheered.

Back inside the Rockers' taxi, the driver is trying to make a decision.

"Hmm... Okay, I'll take your money" The driver said.

"All right!" Spud cheered.

Rock hands his money over to the driver.

"Now let's break some driving laws!" Spud exclaimed.

The driver hits the gas pedal in the taxi.

Meanwhile, at the Empire State Building Emma and Kitty arrive first.

"We made it" Emma said. "Now we just need to climb some stairs"

"How bad could it be?" Kitty asked.

"Don't say that" Emma said. "That almost guarantees that it will be bad"

"The Sisters are the first to arrive at the empire state building" Don narrated. "But they may not be alone for long"

Meanwhile, Josee and Jacques are waiting for the traffic to start moving.

"Hang on, I think I hear cars behind us moving" Jacques said.

"Oh thank God" Josee said.

The Rockers' taxi speeds past Josee and Jacques.

"What was that?!" Josee exclaimed. "Quickly Jacques, after them!"

"Right" Jacques said.

Meanwhile the Sisters arrive at the Empire State Building observation deck. They both look very sweaty and worn out.

"The Ice Dancers and Rockers are catching up" Don narrated. "But thanks to editing the Sisters have already made it to the observation deck"

"Made it..." Kitty said tiredly.

"Oh thank god..." Emma said. "I see the briefcases"

Emma and Kitty walk over to the briefcases with the travel tips. Emma detaches the travel tip from the briefcase.

"Take this briefcase to the midpoint Chill Zone in Central Park" Emma read.

Cut to Don at the Chill Zone in Central Park.

"You heard the travel tip" Don said. "Teams must race here to the midpoint Chill Zone and hand me their tip to move on to the next challenge. If they're the last team to arrive, they're done. Cut from the race! Man, whoever that happens to is going to lose it"

Don look off screen.

"Be sure to get some extra cameras to catch that footage" Don said.

"Yes sir" A man off screen said.

Meanwhile, the Rockers' taxi arrives outside the Empire State building.

"Sweet! I don't see any other cabs" Rock said.

"We must be in first" Spud said.

"I can't find any parking spots" The driver said.

"That's cool" Spud said. "Just let us out here"

"You got it chief" The driver said.

Rock and Spud get out of the car and run towards the Empire State Building. Before they can enter they are almost hit by the Ice Dancers' taxi parking on the sidewalk.

"Whoa!" Rock exclaimed.

Josee and Jacques get out of the taxi.

"Hey man, you almost killed us" Spud said.

"Out of the way!" Josee said.

Josee and Jacques run past the Rockers and start going up the stairs.

"Let's follow them" Rock said.

Rock and Spud run into the building and start running up the stairs.

Meanwhile, up in the stairwell the Ice Dancers are running as fast as they can.

"First in the building, first to complete the challenge, first to win the million!" Josee declared.

"Um... Maybe not" Jacques said.

Emma and Kitty run past the Ice Dancers on their way down.

"Hi guys" Kitty said.

"So long" Emma said.

"Are you kidding me!" Josee shouted.

Meanwhile, Rock and Spud are running at a slower pace than the Ice Dancers.

"Hey man, I think we should pace ourselves a little bit..." Spud said. "I'm getting a bit tired"

"No time to stop man!" Rock exclaimed

"If you say so" Rock said.

Emma and Kitty run past them.

"Hi Spud, thanks for trying to help in the Bahamas" Kitty said. "Even if it didn't really help much"

"No problem Kitten" Spud said.

"It's Kitty" Kitty corrected.

Meanwhile, at the observation deck Josee and Jacques have arrived and are looking at their travel tip.

"It says to go to Central Park" Jacques said.

"Than let's go!" Josee said.

Rock and Spud arrive in their and take the last briefcase and travel tip.

"Central park! Let's go" Rock said.

"This is so much fun!" Spud exclaimed.

In the stairwell Josee and Jacques are running back down now.

"We need to move faster!" Josee yelled.

"Be careful" Jacques said. "You don't want to fall"

"Jacques, that's ridiculous" Josee said. "I'm an professional ice dancer, I can't-"

From being too caught up with Jacques Josee trips over and falls down three flights of stairs. She lands face first on the third break between the stairs.

"Josee!" Jacques exclaims.

Jacques starts running towards Josee but he also trips over and tumbles down several flights of stairs. He lands next to Josee. The Rockers run past them.

"Later guys" Rock said.

Josee and Jacques get up from the ground. They look very scratched up from the fall and Jacques has a black eye.

"You okay?" Jacques asked.

"I think so" Josee said. "Hang on, I feel like I swallowed something"

Josee coughs up one of her own teeth.

"Oh, that does not look good" Jacques said.

"It'll be fine" Josee said. "I'll just get a fake one. Now come on! We can still win this!"

Josee and Jacques start running down the stairs again.

Meanwhile, Emma and Kitty exit the building. Kitty sees the taxi Josee and Jacques parked on the sidewalk.

"Hey look, that must be for us" Kitty said.

"I don't think so Kitty" Emma said. "Who parks a taxi on the sidewalk?"

"Good point" Kitty said.

"Come on, let's just call a taxi" Emma said.

Emma and Kitty walk up to the street.

"Taxi!" Emma yelled.

A taxi pulls up to them. Emma and Kitty get inside.

"Where are you going?" The driver asked.

"Central park!" Emma said.

They drive off.

After that Rock and Spud exit the Empire State Building. Spud sees the Ice Dancers' taxi.

"Whoa man, they must have left us a taxi" Spud said.

"Yeah!" Rock cheered. "Let's do this"

Rock and Spud get in the taxi and drive away.

Josee and Jacques make it out of the building and see that their taxi is gone.

"Our taxi!" Josee yelled. "One of the others must have taken it!"

"Quick, start running" Jacques said.

Josee and Jacques start running down the sidewalk.

Meanwhile, Emma and Kitty's taxi arrives at Central Park.

"Here you are ladies" The driver said.

"Thanks" Kitty said.

Emma and Kitty get out of the cab and run over to the Chill Zone.

"Hold it right there" Don said. "You took the subway to the Empire State Building instead of a taxi. You get a twenty minute penalty"

"Josee and Jacques made us crash our taxi" Emma said.

"Really" Don said. "Let me review the footage"

Someone from off camera hands Don a touch screen tablet. Don observes the footage of the Ice Dancers ramming into the Sisters' taxi.

"Fine, I'll allow it" Don said. "There's another Don Box nearby. It contains another travel tip. Good luck"

 **Team Interview**

"Yes! We're in the final two!" Kitty cheered. "Woohoo!"

"But one of the other teams might be able to catch up to us!" Emma said nervously. "And if that happens I won't be able to go to law school! And-"

"Emma! Calm down. I'm sure we'll be able to keep the lead" Kitty said.

"Right. Let's do this Kitty!" Emma cheered.

They both high five.

 **End Interview**

Emma and Kitty run over to the next Don Box. Kitty takes a travel tip.

"It's an All-In. Buoys will be buoys" Kitty read. "It says to go to the boat house and use one of the boats to search the buoys in the pond for the combination that will unlock your briefcase"

"Well first we need to find the boathouse" Emma said.

Emma and Kitty walk up to a map of Central Park.

"Okay I think we're right here" Emma said as she pointed to the upper right hand corner of the map.

"That's not right. I'm pretty sure we're around here" Kitty said as she pointed to the lower left hand corner of the map.

"This might take a while" Kitty said.

Meanwhile, Josee and Jacques are still running around in the streets of New York City.

"It's no use. We'll never be able to catch up" Jacques said.

"I think I have an idea" Josee said.

Josee points up ahead in the road to a man driving a car shaped like a hot dog.

 **Team Interview**

"Why was there a man in a hot dog car? Why did he drive something impractical? Was he affiliated with the Oscar Mayer Company?" Jacques asked rhetorically.

"We don't know" Josee said. "But we saw opportunity and we took it!"

 **End Interview**

Josee steps in front of the hot dog car. The man in the car hits the breaks.

"Out of the car! Now!" Josee shouted.

The man in the car gets out and the Ice Dancers get in. They speed off in the hot dog car.

"Faster Josee!" Jacques said.

"I'm going as fast as I can" Josee said. "Try and find a map or something"

"Right" Jacques said.

Jacques opens the glove compartment and he sees nothing but bottles of mustard.

"Oh come on!" Jacques exclaimed. "Who in their right mind puts mustard in a glove compartment!"

Meanwhile, Emma and Kitty are still arguing over the map.

"Okay, if the Central Park Zoo is here than that means we are here" Emma said as she pointed at the map.

"That makes no sense" Kitty insisted.

"Why doesn't this map have one of those "You are here" markers?" Emma asked.

Meanwhile at the midpoint Chill Zone Rock and Spud arrive.

"Hold up Rockers" Don said. "You get a twenty minute penalty"

"What?! Why?" Rock asked.

"Yeah man, what did we do?" Spud asked.

"You were supposed to take your own taxi to the Empire State Building" Don said. "Not a regular taxi"

"But those icy guys destroyed our taxi" Spud said. "It was our only choice"

"Huh, really" Don said. "Let me take a look at that"

A man from off screen hands Don a touchscreen tablet.

"Thank you" Don said.

"Hurry up Don man!" Rock said. "The Ice Dancers are catching up"

The camera pans over to the Ice Dancers parking their hot dog car.

"Run! Run!" Josee yelled. "We can still make it!"

"I'm running!" Jacques said.

Josee trips over and slams into the ground.

"Are you okay?" Jacques asked.

"Pick me up!" Josee yelled.

Jacques picks up his partner and starts running again.

The camera pans back to Don observing footage of the Rockers' car crashing.

"Well it looks like no penalty for you" Don said. "Your next Don Box is nearby. Good luck!"

"Yes!" Rock cheered.

"Awesome!" Spud exclaimed.

Rock and Spud run over to the Don Box and the Ice Dancers run over to the Chill Zone.

"Jacques, Josee, I'm sorry... That it took me so long to say this: You're cut from the competition!" Don announced.

"What?!" Jacques yelled.

Jacques drops Josee in surprise and she lands head first on the ground.

"You idiot!" Josee yelled at her partner. "This is your fault!"

Josee gets up from the ground.

"My fault?! If you didn't fall down that stairwell we'd still be in this competition!" Jacques yelled.

"You're a weak partner! You hear me!? Weak!" Josee shouted.

"Weak?! You're the one with claustrophobia!" Jacques said. "I swear, if- Oh forget it! It's over. We lost"

"It's all over" Josee said.

Clips of Josee and Jacques competing play while they talk over them.

"I wish I could leave saying I'm proud of what we did. But I can't" Jacques said over a clip of him putting vegetable oil on the emu in Argentina.

"Maybe we don't deserve to be champions. Look at the way we behaved" Josee said as a clip of her taking the lava rock from Hawaii.

"But we can learn from these mistakes" Jacques said over a clip of them throwing a coconut at the Goths in the Bahamas.

"But first I think we should go to a hospital" Josee said as the footage switched to them walking away.

"Good idea. You need a new tooth" Jacques said.

"I think you also gave me another concussion" Josee said.

"Oh, I'm sure it's not that bad" Jacques said.

The camera pans over to Don.

"The Ice Dancers are gone and the Rockers are moving on to the next challenge"Don said. "Let's see how this goes"

Cut to both teams looking at the map.

"I keep telling you, we're closer to the zoo" Emma said.

"That doesn't sound right" Kitty said.

"I thought we were somewhere in the centre of the park" Spud said

"That's not right either" Rock said.

A woman notices them and walks over.

"Um... Do you need any help?" The woman asked.

"Do you know which direction the boathouse is?" Emma asked.

"Well we're here" The woman said as she pointed to the middle right side of the map. "So you want to go to the right"

"I think we were both way off" Spud said.

"Let's go!" Emma said.

"Thanks ma'am" Rock said.

"Have a good day" The woman said.

Both teams start racing towards the boathouse.

"The Sisters and Rockers are neck and neck as they hit the water and search for the combination to their suitcases" Don narrated.

Each team gets into a canoe and goes out on to the water.

"Inside awaits the final travel tip with a map to this seasons final Chill Zone" Don narrated.

Cut to Don at the final Chill Zone which is on big stage. All the eliminated teams are watching from the bleachers.

"Whoever gets here first wins: One. Million. Dollars!" Don announced.

All the observing teams cheer except for Taylor and the Ice Dancers.

"I wonder how the other teams feel about the finale?" Don asked.

 **Team Interview**

"What a fantastic quest these teams have been on!" Leonard said. "From the deadly deserts of Morocco to the forest of Central Park"

"I wish we could have gone on that journey" Tammy said. "If only our spells worked"

"I guess we didn't get the pronunciation right" Leonard said.

"That must have been it" Tammy said.

 **Second Interview**

"The Sisters versus the Rockers. What an exciting finale" Pete said.

Pete pretends to go to sleep. Gerry and Pete both laugh.

"When they say rockers do they mean the musical kind or the kind that mine for rocks?" Gerry jokingly asked.

"Ah who cares, they both stink" Pete said.

 **Third Interview**

"Do we care who wins?" Judy asked. "No we don't"

"I honestly don't even know who's in the finale" Lucy said. "We weren't paying attention"

"But hey, while we were here we got some authentic New York pizza" Judy said.

"It's overrated" Lucy said.

 **Fourth Interview**

"I'm hoping that the Sisters win" Mickey said. "Kitty was really nice to me and we were briefly in an alliance"

"Yeah, I hope they win too" Jay said.

"Being on this show has been great for us" Mickey said. "Just today I was able to read the morning newspaper with out giving myself a paper cut"

"That's major step up" Jay said.

Jay and Mickey high five.

"Hey, we did it with out hurting ourselves that time" Mickey said.

 **Fifth Interview**

"So what if we got eliminated early" Ryan said. "Me and Steph really connected"

"Yeah, we got through our first major fight on this show" Stephanie said.

"We sure did..."Ryan said.

"Uh huh..." Stephanie said.

Ryan and Stephanie lean towards each other.

"Please don't make out" The cameraman said. "Last time you did that it went on for half an hour"

 **Sixth Interview**

"Are you sad we didn't make it to the finale sweetie?" Kelly asked her daughter.

"No. No way" Taylor said. "I'm glad we got out before we got to do anything super disgusting. Like eat worms. Or share a sauna. So gross"

"That's my girl" Kelly said.

 **Seventh Interview**

"Did we want to be in the finale? No" Lewis said. "We're actors. We're already rich"

"And thanks to this show we've gotten our careers back together" Tracey said.

"Now we're playing Bill and Hillary Clinton in the upcoming movie Clinton: The Musical!" Lewis announced.

"We promise it won't be as bad as our last several films" Tracey said.

 **Eighth Interview**

"We're hoping the Rockers win" Lorenzo said. "Those guys are pretty cool"

"Yeah. But even they are no match for our newest invention" Chet said. "Parkour Kung Fu!"

"Observe" Lorenzo said.

Chet and Lorenzo start doing various flips and kicks but end up accidentally knocking over the camera and smashing it.

 **Ninth Interview**

"We could have been in the finale. If only I didn't try to be the bad guy" Melvin said.

"On the bright side we have gotten magic business has gotten more popular" Trevor said. "And I've been working on new magic tricks. Like this"

Trevor raises his hands in the air as if something magical was supposed to happen.

"Um... Am I missing something?" Melvin asked.

"A dove was supposed to fly out of my jacket" Trevor said.

"I think it's dead" Melvin said.

 **Tenth Interview**

"We've learned a lot from out time on this show" Ellody said.

"Yes, we have learned that intellect isn't everything and that we should never trust Bonnie ever again" Mary said.

"Agreed" Ellody said. "I am very glad she didn't win"

"And her name sounds like it belongs to a nineteen fifties housewife" Mary said. "I just felt like making fun of that"

"It wasn't very funny" Ellody said.

"I thought it was funny" Mary said.

 **Eleventh Interview**

"I can't believe we didn't win!" Bonnie said.

"Look on the bright side" Jack said. "At least you're a better person"

"Yeah. But we could've gotten a million dollars" Bonnie said. "But I suppose friendship is important or whatever"

"You're a work in progress" Jack said.

 **Twelfth Interview**

"We had an awesome time on this show" Geoff said. "I did things I never thought I'd do"

"Totally bro" Brody said. "It was completely insane!"

Geoff and Brody fist bump.

"Too bad those ice dudes got us eliminated" Brody said.

"At least they aren't in the finale" Geoff said.

 **Thirteenth Interview**

"On one hand, we lost" Noah said. "On the other hand, I have a girlfriend who might win a million dollars"

"Go Emma and Kitty!" Owen cheered.

"Okay Owen, don't get too excited" Noah said. "There's still a chance they might lose... But it's a low chance"

 **Fourteenth Interview**

"A lot has happened in this race" Devin said. "But I think the best part was me and Carrie getting together"

"Aw... Thanks Devin" Carrie said.

Carrie kisses Devin on the cheek.

"Honestly, this kind of makes up for not being in the finale" Carrie said.

 **Fifteenth Interview**

"Well we ended up blowing our second chance" Miles said. "But I think we've learned something"

"What?" Laurie asked.

"I don't know" Miles said. "But it's in there somewhere"

"At least we had fun" Laurie said.

 **Sixteenth Interview**

"Ha! Those Ice Dancers lost!" MacArthur said. "That's what you get for playing dirty"

"Easy MacArthur" Sanders said. "I do feel kind of bad for Josee. She did lose a tooth"

"But she's Josee" MacArthur said.

"Okay fine, I'm glad they lost too" Sanders said. "Just a little"

 **Seventeenth Interview**

"I really don't know who I want to win" Tom said. "We were in a kind-of-rivalry with the Rockers but I don't really know much about the Sisters"

"I say the Sisters" Jen said. "If only just to make the Rockers mad"

"They don't really get mad" Tom said.

"True" Jen said.

 **Eighteenth Interview**

"Well I have good news and I have bad news" Dwayne said. "Bad news is we aren't in the finale. Good news is that I'm getting rid of my face tattoo"

"Where'd you get the money?" Junior asked. "Please don't say I have to go to community college"

"No, I didn't dip into the college fund" Dwayne said. "But, I can't tell you where I got the money... Or where my wedding ring went... Or where that expensive lamp in the living room is"

"I think I just figured it out" Junior said.

 **Nineteenth Interview**

Crimson and Ennui aren't wearing make up but are wearing dark coloured clothes.

"I'm so happy the Ice Dancers got eliminated" Crimson said.

"Me too" Ennui said.

They both smile.

"This is really bad for my face" Crimson said.

"Mine too" Ennui said.

 **Twentieth Interview**

Josee and Jacques have their injuries patched up. But Josee is still missing her tooth.

"Ugh, this finale is terrible" Jacques said.

"Where's the talent, where's the passion!" Josee said.

"We give both teams a zero out of ten" Jacques said.

"Now come on Jacques, I need to find a dentist" Josee said.

 **End Interviews**

Meanwhile out on the water the Sisters and Rockers are paddling their boats. A weird noise that kind of sounds like biting can be heard.

"Do you hear that?" Emma asked.

"Sounds like someone's eating something" Kitty said.

Kitty looks over at the Rockers.

"Hey, don't blame us man" Spud said.

"Yeah, we thought it was you" Rock said.

"Huh, that's weird" Kitty said. "I could have sworn-"

Kitty is cut off by a snapping turtle jumping out of the water and biting her arm.

"Ah! Come on!" Kitty exclaimed. "Stupid canoe... Why can't someone invent a water car"

"You mean a motor boat?" Emma asked.

"Oh... Right" Kitty said.

The camera pans over to Rock and Spud paddling their boat.

"Hey man, you know what they should make?" Spud asked. "A water car!"

"Whoa, that is the best idea I have ever heard" Rock said. "Ever"

"Write this down" Spud said. "We could go down in history"

Rock and Spud make it over to a buoy. Rock lifts the buoy out of the water.

"It says... One, six, eight" Rock said. "Try that"

Spud inters that combination into the briefcase number area but it doesn't work.

"Nope" Spud said.

The camera pans over to Emma and Kitty by a buoy.

"Kitty, you get the combination, I'll distract the Rockers" Emma said.

"How?" Kitty asked.

"I don't know, I'll think of something" Emma said.

Emma sees another snapping turtle in the water and picks it up.

"Hey, rock stars!" Emma yelled.

Rock and Spud look over at Emma.

"What?" Rock asked.

"Catch!" Emma exclaimed.

Emma throws the snapping turtle at the Rockers. They duck and narrowly avoid it.

"Whoa!" Spud exclaimed.

"Emma! What is wrong with you!" Kitty exclaimed.

"Sorry... I didn't know what else to do" Emma said.

"There were so many better options" Kitty said.

"You're right. I'm very sorry" Emma said.

"Let's just forget about them for now" Kitty said. "We should focus on the challenge"

The camera pans over to Rock and Spud.

"What's the plan Rock?" Spud asked.

"Um... Search buoys until we find something" Rock said.

"Sounds simple... I like it!" Spud said.

A montage of the Rockers and Sisters looking a buoys and trying combinations on their briefcase plays while Don narrates it.

"The search for the final travel tip of the entire race is on" Don narrated. "And the gloves are off. Who will it be? If I wasn't standing while recording this I'd be on the edge of my seat!"

Kitty goes up to another buoy and picks it up.

"Okay, try one, one, seven" Kitty said.

"Got it" Emma said.

Emma enters the combination into the briefcase and it pops open.

"It worked!" Emma exclaimed.

She takes the final travel tip, which is golden, out of the briefcase.

"Yeah!" Kitty cheered.

Kitty hugs her sister.

"Aw... Thanks" Emma said. "Now come on! To the shore!"

Emma and Kitty start paddling their boat back to the shore.

The camera pans over to the Rockers.

"Come on man, we need to hurry up!" Spud said.

"Right" Rock said.

Rock picks up another buoy.

"Okay, try this code" Rock said. "Four, zero, nine"

Spud enters the combination into the briefcase and it opens.

"Yes!" Spud cheered.

He takes the golden travel tip out of the briefcase.

"Come on! Let's go!" Spud cheered.

Rock and Spud start rowing their boat back towards the shore.

The camera pans over to Emma and Kitty paddling their boat.

"Emma! We need to go faster!" Kitty said.

"I'm trying the best I can" Emma said. "Neither of us have really strong arms"

The Rockers catch up to them.

"Hey there guys" Spud said. "How's it going?"

"Don't taunt me!" Emma yelled.

"What? I'm just saying hi" Spud said.

"Oh... Hi" Emma said.

"Good luck" Rock said.

The Rockers and the Sisters reach the shore. They get out of their canoes and run down the path the travel tip instructed them to.

"Faster Kitty! I am not giving up a million dollars!" Emma said.

"I'm going as fast as I can" Kitty said.

"Come one Spud, we're not some dumb musicians, we can do this!" Rock motivated.

"Yeah! We can do it!" Spud cheered.

The two team begin to approach the final Chill Zone.

"We're almost there! All right!" Kitty cheered.

"I can almost taste the money" Spud said. "Tastes like fried chicken"

The camera pans over to Don standing at the final Chill Zone.

"It's the last dash to the final Chill Zone" Don said. "After twenty one countries and multiple challenges it comes down to this!"

Don holds up a silver platter with a bunch of stacked up money on it.

"Who is going to win this million dollars?" Don asked.

The camera moves back over the Sisters and the Rockers running.

"Emma... My legs are getting tired" Kitty said.

"Mine too, but we need to push through this" Emma said.

"Okay..." Kitty said.

"Hey man, I'm kinda tired too" Spud said.

"You heard them man! Push through it" Rock said.

The Rockers and Sisters run up the stairs to the stage where the Carpet of Completion is. The first team to make it up to the carpet is...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

... The Sisters make it on to the Carpet of Completion first with the Rockers reaching the carpet after them.

"The Sisters win it!" Don announced. "All one million dollars"

Spud collapses on to the carpet from exhaustion.

"We did it!" Kitty cheered.

"We make a great team" Emma said. "You really are a great sister"

"Aw... Thanks" Kitty said.

"Looks like everybody's happy" Don said.

"We're not!" Josee shouted from the audience.

"For the last time, I don't care!" Don shouted back.

Footage of Rock and Spud competing plays while they narrate it.

"Making it to the final two teams just to get eliminated kinda blows. But I'm still real proud of Spud. We learned a lot in this race" Rock said over a clip of Spud biting Rocks hand to eat some Choco-Oinks.

"Heh, thanks man. Maybe we can even win this thing" Spud said over a clip of him air guitaring in Finland.

"We just lost. Right now. We lost even bigger than anyone else. Even those LARP guys" Rock said over a clip of him waiting for Spud to react to his hand being bitten by bullet ants in Brazil.

"Oh yeah... Right" Spud said over a clip of him pretending a snake is a guitar in Australia.

The footage switches to clips of the Sisters competing in the race while they talk over them.

"This race has been the most incredible experience of my life" Emma said as a clip of Kitty deflecting tennis balls from the Tennis Bot in Dubai while she hides behind Kitty.

"I know, I don't regret a single moment of this race" Kitty said over a clip of her taking a picture of her and Mickey.

"I'm so proud of you Kitty" Emma said over a clip of her pushing Kitty into the water in Hawaii.

"Aw... Thanks" Kitty said as a clip of her taking a picture of herself and the gravedigger in Romania.

"I'd take you over a million bucks any day... But the million dollars is still nice" Emma said as a clip of Kitty riding the mechanical bull in Alberta was shown.

The scene shifts to all the eliminated teams standing behind Don. Emma and Kitty are looking at the million dollars they just won. Kitty is throwing it up in the air.

"Yes, throw all your money on the ground. Very smart" Don said sarcastically.

"It's fine" Kitty said. "I'll clean it up"

"That's all for now" Don said to the camera. "We hope you enjoyed our race around the world. Be sure to keep an eye out for more of: The Ridonculous Race!"

* * *

 **Well that was the finale. I really hope you had as much fun reading this as I had writing this. If you're wondering why I eliminated the Ice Dancers at the midpoint, it's because they didn't really deserve the million dollars. But that's pretty obvious. Also, there's an alternate ending available if you wanted Rock and Spud to win. Anyway, let me know what you thought of: The Ridonculous Race: Reimagined.**


	27. Alternate Ending

The Rockers and the Sisters reach the shore. They get out of their canoes and run down the path the travel tip instructed them to.

"Faster Kitty! I am not giving up a million dollars!" Emma said.

"I'm going as fast as I can" Kitty said.

"Come one Spud, we're not some dumb musicians, we can do this!" Rock motivated.

"Yeah! We can do it!" Spud cheered.

The two team begin to approach the final Chill Zone.

"We're almost there! All right!" Kitty cheered.

"I can almost taste the money" Spud said. "Tastes like fried chicken"

The camera pans over to Don standing at the final Chill Zone.

"It's the last dash to the final Chill Zone" Don said. "After twenty one countries and multiple challenges it comes down to this!"

Don holds up a silver platter with a bunch of stacked up money on it.

"Who is going to win this million dollars?" Don asked.

The camera moves back over the Sisters and the Rockers running.

"Emma... My legs are getting tired" Kitty said.

"Mine too, but we need to push through this" Emma said.

"Okay..." Kitty said.

"Hey man, I'm kinda tired too" Spud said.

"You heard them man! Push through it" Rock said.

The Rockers and Sisters run up the stairs to the stage where the Carpet of Completion is. The first team to make it up to the carpet is...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

...

... The Rockers make it on to the Carpet of Completion first with the Sisters reaching the carpet after them.

"The Rockers win it!" Don announced. "All one million dollars"

Spud collapses on to the carpet from exhaustion.

"We did it!" Rock cheered.

"We won? We won!" Spud cheered.

"If you weren't on ground I'd high five you" Rock said.

"Looks like everybody's happy" Don said.

"We're not!" Josee shouted from the audience.

"For the last time, I don't care!" Don shouted back.

Footage of Emma and Kitty competing plays while they narrate it.

"This race has been the most incredible experience of my life" Emma said as a clip of Kitty deflecting tennis balls from the Tennis Bot in Dubai while she hides behind Kitty.

"I know, I don't regret a single moment of this race. Even if we lost" Kitty said over a clip of her taking a picture of her and Mickey.

"I'm so proud of you Kitty" Emma said over a clip of her pushing Kitty into the water in Hawaii.

"Aw... Thanks" Kitty said as a clip of her taking a picture of herself and the gravedigger in Romania.

"I'd take you over a million bucks any day... But the million dollars still would've been nice. At least I still have Noah" Emma said as a clip of Kitty riding the mechanical bull in Alberta was shown.

The footage switches to clips of the Rockers competing while they talk over it.

"Making it to the final two teams and winning is awesome! And I'm still real proud of Spud. We learned a lot in this race" Rock said over a clip of Spud biting Rocks hand to eat some Choco-Oinks.

"Heh, thanks man. Maybe we can even win this thing" Spud said over a clip of him air guitaring in Finland.

"Spud, we just won. Like, right now" Rock said over a clip of him waiting for Spud to react to his hand being bitten by bullet ants in Brazil.

"Wait? We won!" Spud said over a clip of him pretending a snake is a guitar in Australia.

The scene shifts to all the eliminated teams standing behind Don. Rock and Spud are looking at the money they won and throwing it up in the air.

"Yes, throw all your money on the ground. Very smart" Don said sarcastically.

"It's fine" Rock said. "We'll clean it up later"

"That's all for now" Don said to the camera. "We hope you enjoyed our race around the world. Be sure to keep an eye out for more of: The Ridonculous Race!"


End file.
